Profile pictures and smiles (Full Version)

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thetammyjo -> Profile pictures and smiles (12/14/2006 1:37:43 PM)

When I log on I often see a profile of someone who might fit those search categories we can choose. What I notice is that often the picture is unflattering and I was wondering why today.

For me, I think it is the lack of a smile.

In my picture I am smiling so much it practically breaks the image -- I was very happy when that picture was taken. So if you think I'm too fat or you hate curly, red hair, you get distracted by my sincere grin (I hope).

So why do people choose to use pictures where they are not smiling or even worse where they look so sad and miserable?

Is it some idea that it will make them look more serious or more submissive?

I think it just looks sad and I don't need a sad person in my life, do you?




LordVelvet -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/14/2006 2:09:32 PM)

tammyjo,
I agree with you that a nice smile goes a long way in a photo. As to why other choose not to have one I couldn't say, I choose not to have a photo at all, wonder what that says about ME?




asubiam -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/14/2006 2:11:52 PM)

I also choose not to post a picture, but have no problem sending one if requested.




cjenny -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/14/2006 2:11:52 PM)

oh jeez. i'm not smiling in my pic. i hadn't even thought about that.




LuciusAestus -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/14/2006 2:49:45 PM)

I find myself looking stupid when smiling on photos. I don't really think I look good on pictures in general, but my smile seems to magnify this. People usually say I look angry in my pix, I prefer smiling on the inside ;). And in general I guess people have different ways they like to be seen, so some people will smile and some will not and perhaps many on't even think about it. If someone wishes for people to think they're friendly, a smile would be fitting, but perhaps some people want the opposite?




thetammyjo -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/14/2006 4:12:57 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: cjenny

oh jeez. i'm not smiling in my pic. i hadn't even thought about that.


Yours isn't a close up of your face. I'd say you look thoughtful or that you are listening to someone.




thetammyjo -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/14/2006 4:13:59 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuciusAestus

I find myself looking stupid when smiling on photos. I don't really think I look good on pictures in general, but my smile seems to magnify this. People usually say I look angry in my pix, I prefer smiling on the inside ;). And in general I guess people have different ways they like to be seen, so some people will smile and some will not and perhaps many on't even think about it. If someone wishes for people to think they're friendly, a smile would be fitting, but perhaps some people want the opposite?



That's why I had mine taken when I was very happy.

There was a study a while ago that you can't fake a real smile because while you can make your mouth do the motions, your eyes won't and people can tell the difference.




Rumtiger -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/14/2006 4:14:44 PM)

have you seen the pic where I try to smile?

It scares even me sometimes.




Aileen68 -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/14/2006 7:01:13 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: masterbobandsub

ill even take you to the loo and wipe your botty .

But will you smile while you do that?




Najakcharmer -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/14/2006 8:33:53 PM)

I picked my main picture for two reasons.  One, I like the mood I was in when it was taken, and I think at least some of it comes through in my expression.  I'm working with a wild critter that isn't visible in this version of the photo. I am completely focused and intent on what I am doing, with what I would describe as Zen-like calm, and a real sense of pleasure and enjoyment at working with the magnificent animal.   It's not - exactly - a smile, but I think it conveys some of what I want it to.  I could be wrong however.

The second reason I use that as my main profile pic is that it's the plain old me with no makeup and about 50+ lbs heavier than I am now, and that helps filter out some of the assholes that are writing me for the wrong reasons.




kyra -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/14/2006 8:42:25 PM)

 i love a stern, dominant look. rawr! however, i think there should be a variety of pictures. at least one with a smile ^__^




SmokingGun82 -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/14/2006 9:18:55 PM)

I like the picture on my profile... I wasn't paying attention and my roommate at the time was a photographer. Plus, I always look like I'm faking a smile in pictures, no matter how happy I am. 




pixelslave -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/14/2006 9:45:53 PM)

In general, I have to agree with you Tammy Jo.  A photo says a lot about a person to me.  If it isn't either warm, thoughtful, sensuous, or otherwise appealing for one reason or another, I'm not going to be attracted to it.  Photos of people who appear angry, disinterested, sad, lonely, stern, vicious, extreme, etc., aren't at all appealing to me.  I want to be with someone who is warm and inviting.  [:)]

When we get to the point where we know each other and are ready to begin a scene together, she can show me the other parts that can be nasty, wicked, strict, and for other reasons quite exciting.  Until then, I want to know the person behind that persona who I'd want to spend a lot of time with.  That's just my opinion, your mileage may vary. [8|]

- pixel




Najakcharmer -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/15/2006 12:15:35 AM)

I wouldn't mind some feedback on the expression in my profile pic.  What does it convey?  Does it qualify as a smile or not?  I know what I'm doing in the pic and how I'm feeling, but I'm less sure of how well it might be translating to other folks who see it.  Especially since this version of the pic doesn't actually show anything other than the facial expression.




DanceDreaming -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/15/2006 12:23:35 AM)

Yours is kinda -like- a smile Najak. It's pretty inviting, and warm, even if it isn't a beaming smile like TammyJo. Mine isn't a smile, but I still love the pic. Going to have to upload a cleaner copy though... that one got mangled somehow.




littlesarbonn -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/15/2006 12:32:18 AM)

I try not to smile because then the police might recognize my picture.

I actually just listened to a graduate student give a final paper presentation on the literature involving why interpersonal communication often leads to situations where smiling is frowned upon, for lack of better wording. There's a belief in a lot of communities that people who smile look ridiculous because they are not used to seeing themselves smile very often. As such, they frown when they take pictures, because they are used to seeing that reaction in themselves and don't want to look ridiculous (even though they don't really). Even I don't smile that often in pictures. I'm just as guilty as everyone else.




Najakcharmer -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/15/2006 1:11:42 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DanceDreaming

Yours is kinda -like- a smile Najak. It's pretty inviting, and warm, even if it isn't a beaming smile like TammyJo. Mine isn't a smile, but I still love the pic. Going to have to upload a cleaner copy though... that one got mangled somehow.


Thanks for the feedback!

People who see the rest of the photo either never see the expression or they do a major double take when they do. That's one of the reasons I don't show the whole thing.  The critter I've got my hands on in this picture is arguably among the world's most dangerous animals, and it is clearly signalling defensive intent.   I feel a Zen-like calm and a deep focus inside the mind of the animal, so that I am aware of its intentions and reactions almost before it is.  This focus allows me to stay literally one step ahead of it as I work at very close quarters.  Also I am thinking how beautiful the animal is and how rewarding it is to work with this particular species, and concerned for the animal's safety and comfort.

I tend to be extremely camera shy and prefer to avoid audiences in circumstances like these, as I don't believe that wild animals should be used to bolster human ego and there's far too much of that type of annoying drama around already.  So I don't have a lot of photos of me that capture the "perfectly calm, controlled and centered" mindset.  That's why I keep this one, even though it's a bit outdated.  




beltainefaerie -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/15/2006 1:39:09 AM)

I definitely like the smiles, but I think some people are trying to look serious and are afraid smiling will make them look goofy.

cjenny, you aren't smiling, but you look pleasantly wistful, as opposed to some of the sad, bored or confused-looking pics that I think the OP was referring to.




MsSonnetMarwood -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/15/2006 4:50:09 AM)

I have to be honest - I'm just happy when they're smart enough to send a face shot and not one of their genitalia.





pinkkeith -> RE: Profile pictures and smiles (12/15/2006 7:09:38 AM)

I think my smiles look goofy when I see it in a photograph.

One thing that gets me when looking at a photo is that it never looks like the person I see in the mirror.




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