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ORIGINAL: TreSwank

Just remember not to tell the women in your life about your penchants for the occasional homo-erotic "fling".  No matter how opened-minded and kinky they fancy themselves to be, 98% of them are NOT okay with it.

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ORIGINAL: TreSwank

..I don't think that the term "bi-sexual" would necessarily fit, because that would imply that your preferences are 50/50, ...

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maybe a little. But we're all a little gay.

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ORIGINAL: Mavis

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ORIGINAL: TreSwank

..I don't think that the term "bi-sexual" would necessarily fit, because that would imply that your preferences are 50/50, ...

Ok, have to chime in here as an actual bisexual person, ... bisexual should not have to imply a 50 / 50 pref at all!   In fact, not one of the bisexual males or females i know considers themselves anywhere near 50 / 50, they tend to have a clear pref for one gender, or have NO pref for one gender over the other, with thier sexual attractions being triggered by other things initiating sexual draw, a manner or demeanor that can present in either male or female.  (ie, if i love YOU, i am attracted to the body you come in)

my opinion, (which could be changed, but i'd need some serious convincing and i'm not being obstinant, i just think i'm logically right, given what i know about the topic personally.)  

IF you'd even consider doing anything sexual with a person of same gender, you have bisexual tendancies.  Even if it's 1%, it's still Bi.   A completely straight person cannot even entertain the thought.  It's so foreign to them, it doesn't connect with their sexuality. 

That said, it doesn't mean bisexual persons are without choice, many who are "bi-curious" never act on it, it doesn't make them any less bi, but it doesn't mean they have to claim to be practicing, even to themselves.  Some people will feel better if they don't explore it further than the reaches of thier minds.  Some bisexuals have only one significant same gendered relationship in their whole lives, this doesn't make them any less bi than people concurrently involved with  both genders.

As for bi-folk being greedy, we're no more greedy to say we could have satisfying relationships or encounters with both males and females than it is for me to say i like both blonde men and bald men.  AND it doesn't mean i "would do" any bald men i run into just because they happen to be bald.  (bald and rich, maybe!)

So anyway,  you've asked for opinions, and i vote yes, you're Bi because you considered it.  Not only that, you did it.  AND went back for more, so this is no fluke, it's clearly an interest someplace in your being.  Doesn't mean you have to give it reign if the fallout disturbs you. 

Hey, i think The Rock is hot, but the fallout of my kidnapping him would make him off permantently fantasy-land only. It's only hot in my head, once taken to the street, my life would be impacted poorly.  If i found a guy with similar attributes, and no accompianing fallout, i might go for it.  That's how your bisexuality can be for you, if you run into something that doesn't have that negative fallout for you, indulge it.  If not, keep it wrapped.  It doesn't change your life.

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ORIGINAL: labsintheriver
I’d really like to ask your advice to help me resolve something which has really worried me for years. In spite of having experimented, I’m still not 100% comfortable with my sexuality. Let me give you the “data” and you can tell me your opinion:

But….the bi (or maybe even gay?) bit…….
I fancied a few boys at school. I remember being attracted aged 14 to a boy I saw in his swimming trunks. I wanted to play with his bottom and cock. (I did flirt but got nowhere.)
However, I have always liked looking at some gay porn.
I find (some) male cocks & butts attractive.
I find pics of (some) gay BDSM erotic
I find pics of (some) gay sex erotic
There is a narrow range that I find sexy- tends to be muscular, good looking, non-camp, often black, dominant, smooth studs!
Looking at pics of more average men I find most repulsive

In real life, it is VERY RARE for me to see a man who I find attractive. There are just a couple who I’ve ever flirted with.
To test myself out, I have experimented with several of one-off casual encounters with men and a couple of TS’s. In summary:

I loved getting fucked in the butt
I usually find giving oral repulsive (feels dirty, diseased) but occasionally this is overcome by being turned on.
I sometimes enjoy receiving oral from a man, but the look and smell is not “right.”
I am really turned off by the smell, whiskers, hair, maleness of a man. I have to repress this in order to find the more sexy bits attractive.
I enjoyed kissing one ultra sexy man while he jerked me off, but otherwise find it utterly repellent.
The idea of cuddling a man is disgusting
I have a strong gut feeling which puts me off any romantic contact with a man at all. It would just be repulsive. I don’t think that this is psychological repression, I think it’s a genuine feeling.

I don’t want to be gay or bi really, but accept that I am probably a bit Bi.

Does that ring true to you, or could I be more repressed than I realise?

Are there women out there who are compatible sexually (in fantasy/attitude) with me?

Will I be singing show tunes in a travelling circus in 10 years?

Please don’t just say “just be yourself,” “it’s ok so long as your comfortable with yourself,” or “experiment and see,” as I’ve tried all that. I need a little more explanation and personal stories.

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ORIGINAL: YourhandMyAss

You can have relations with both genders and not be bi,  If master says to and you do it don't mean you're bi.

now if you enjoyed the encounteres with both genders and you will seek bisexual encounters again willingly and with joy yeah you might be bisexual.

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ORIGINAL: NeedToUseYou

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ORIGINAL: YourhandMyAss

You can have relations with both genders and not be bi,  If master says to and you do it don't mean you're bi.

now if you enjoyed the encounteres with both genders and you will seek bisexual encounters again willingly and with joy yeah you might be bisexual.

Maybe, the way you look at it.

The only way I'd agree with your view is if it was forced like rape and there was no  choice in the matter. The mere fact that your master told you to do it, doesn't mean you didn't make the choice to do what he told you to do.

It's still you selecting to do it.

I don't think the logic you are using holds up. If your master told you steal from a store, you'd still be a criminal. If he told you to run across the field at a football game naked, you'd still be streaker. If he told you to whore on the street for money, you'd be a hooker. It's not as if your actions don't count because someone told you to do it. It is still your choice to do it, whether you like what you are doing or not. 

I don't personally see why he is rejecting, what appears to be his impulses personally. It'd probably be easier and healthier in my view, to just accept he likes men sometimes, and stop fighting an internal moral conflict about it. Instead it looks to me like he's grasping for a sexual loophole that will get rid of the pesky label.

Your argument seems to imply people aren't what they do. If they aren't what they do, then what is  "who we are" based on? It certainly isn't based on who we want to be or do. It's what we do that makes people what they are. So, if you do something of your own free will(and slaves, subs, have free to choice not to be a slave or sub to any particular master) then that is who/what you are.

Sorry, it just works out that way.

IMO

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ORIGINAL: PsyVamp

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ORIGINAL: TreSwank

Just remember not to tell the women in your life about your penchants for the occasional homo-erotic "fling".  No matter how opened-minded and kinky they fancy themselves to be, 98% of them are NOT okay with it.

I guess I must be in that 2%, when my sub told me about the male/male encounters he had....Well, just let me say that it opened the door to many, many more possibilities and the thought of it still makes me smile..

OP, I don't think you are bi, but that is only IMO.  My opinion is bias because  I can get turned on looking at "perfect" bodies of either sex.  

Damn Vampyre

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ORIGINAL: Mavis

quote:

ORIGINAL: TreSwank

..I don't think that the term "bi-sexual" would necessarily fit, because that would imply that your preferences are 50/50, ...

Ok, have to chime in here as an actual bisexual person, ... bisexual should not have to imply a 50 / 50 pref at all!   In fact, not one of the bisexual males or females i know considers themselves anywhere near 50 / 50, they tend to have a clear pref for one gender, or have NO pref for one gender over the other, with thier sexual attractions being triggered by other things initiating sexual draw, a manner or demeanor that can present in either male or female.  (ie, if i love YOU, i am attracted to the body you come in)

my opinion, (which could be changed, but i'd need some serious convincing and i'm not being obstinant, i just think i'm logically right, given what i know about the topic personally.)  

IF you'd even consider doing anything sexual with a person of same gender, you have bisexual tendancies.  Even if it's 1%, it's still Bi.   A completely straight person cannot even entertain the thought.  It's so foreign to them, it doesn't connect with their sexuality. 

That said, it doesn't mean bisexual persons are without choice, many who are "bi-curious" never act on it, it doesn't make them any less bi, but it doesn't mean they have to claim to be practicing, even to themselves.  Some people will feel better if they don't explore it further than the reaches of thier minds.  Some bisexuals have only one significant same gendered relationship in their whole lives, this doesn't make them any less bi than people concurrently involved with  both genders.

As for bi-folk being greedy, we're no more greedy to say we could have satisfying relationships or encounters with both males and females than it is for me to say i like both blonde men and bald men.  AND it doesn't mean i "would do" any bald men i run into just because they happen to be bald.  (bald and rich, maybe!)

So anyway,  you've asked for opinions, and i vote yes, you're Bi because you considered it.  Not only that, you did it.  AND went back for more, so this is no fluke, it's clearly an interest someplace in your being.  Doesn't mean you have to give it reign if the fallout disturbs you. 

Hey, i think The Rock is hot, but the fallout of my kidnapping him would make him off permantently fantasy-land only. It's only hot in my head, once taken to the street, my life would be impacted poorly.  If i found a guy with similar attributes, and no accompianing fallout, i might go for it.  That's how your bisexuality can be for you, if you run into something that doesn't have that negative fallout for you, indulge it.  If not, keep it wrapped.  It doesn't change your life.

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ORIGINAL: theRose4U

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maybe a little. But we're all a little gay.

Is that like a little pregnant?

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I also agree with Voltare that going to a professional to clean out the clutter would be helpful, because I know that the man I dated had so much ambivalence about the healthiness/cleanliness of his desires it drove me nuts.   M

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Those are some pretty strong words. If I was describing something that didn't appeal to me, I doubt I'd use such a lexicon; it is reserved for things I hate, well, passionately, and the essence of passionate (or "gut", as you seem to call them) feelings is that they tend to not be very well thought out. Not always a bad thing, but there it is. I wonder if you are responding to social/familial/religious or otherwise external factors? I also notice that twice in your post you go to hyperbolic lengths to express that you are not attracted to the effeminate, stereotypical gay male. Could this be a defense? If so, what are you protecting, and from whom?

Consider that not only will you not find your own truth of feeling if you let it steep in external factors, but that the factors could themselves be propelling what homosexual attractions you do in fact experience (I'm sure we're all familiar with the "it's hot because it's wrong" instinct). It seems very much that you are treading into a lifetime taboo and are terrified of the consequences despite your undeniable arousal. If you really want to love freely, I suggest that one of those two has to go.

Yes, there are women who are compatible with whatever sexuality you're uncovering. I'd certainly say you're not in danger of losing your heterosexual inclinations. You're not in danger of anything, really, except understanding what you want and actually getting it. And that can, of course, be very frightening, and your gut will probably send you all kinds of hyperbolized signals. But your inquisitiveness here suggests it's worth it to you and to your sense of sexuality to jump in and love from a greater understanding of yourself.

And just in case I'm completely off base with all of this, or I'm as coherent as a lobotomized cockatiel, here's a little blue face with some crap comming out of its skull:.

Good luck.