RE: Love and Submission Separate?

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RE: Love and Submission Separate? - 2/26/2005 7:55:36 AM

sinnocentky

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Joined: 2/19/2004
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i have to agree with much of what has been said already. i know that for me, the deeper the emotional connection, the deeper i go into my own slavery. that is not to say though, that to submit i have to love someone. i think it is an ever growing process that as one develops, so does the other. i also find myself taking into thought the fact that as owned property some are at times required to serve other dominants. for me, that service comes from both the fact that i am a slave... and from the love of my master... in other words.. in serving them, i serve him.

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RE: Love and Submission Separate? - 2/26/2005 5:31:40 PM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Leonidas

Hi perverse,

Yeah, terms and trying to define them can wrap you around the axel faster than anything. In my terms, I'd say you belong to your owner (partner for you). You have discovered that you can serve another man as a slave and still belong to your owner (partner). That's not an uncommon discovery to make in my experience. Ownership and love go together for you. Service can be separate. When you say "maybe it's because the other man is second to my partner" I recognize that as something common in my experience. You are serving the other man as your owners slave (again, my terms). For many slave women, that's a big lesson to learn. Most fear that if they do serve the other man well, it will somehow mean that they are less devoted to their master. You are a brave young woman. You're coloring way outside the lines here. There's some good stuff outslde the lines.

Thank you. I appreciate your compliments.

I agree completely with the way you put things. I can serve, without guilt, because I know that I am my partners first. I could not belong to someone I didn't love, because to me, to belong to someone is to give him/her -everything- which (from my POV) must include your love. In order to say someone owns me, I need to be able to say that he owns my mind, my soul and my body. For some, this could occur without love, but I couldn't give -all- of my soul to someone I -didn't- love.

Or something.

It's all pretty confusing, and still pretty new. Frankly, I think it's an ideal situation, because everyone invovled is getting something they didn't have before. Ask me again in six months, though.

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RE: Love and Submission Separate? - 2/26/2005 6:10:08 PM

krikket

Posts: 1183
Joined: 11/17/2004
From: Washington, DC Metro Area
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quote:

Do you find that submission and love are correlated for you (in other words, the extent that you feel one leads you to feel the other) or are they completely separate?

I believe they can be completely separate...i have seen it in people i know personally. As for me, they go hand in hand. I can bottom to another person in play, but submit to them fully? naaaaa, not wired that way.

beautifully said.. i'm pretty much wired the same way. i can, and have, done a little bottoming, but submitting totally, becoming his slave..that takes committment, trust and above all love.

peace ~ joy
jiminie

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RE: Love and Submission Separate? - 2/26/2005 11:12:49 PM

teachmetobeg

Posts: 43
Joined: 1/23/2005
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i have been talking to Sir for what seems like hours, but must be about a month or two that W/we have been conversing. He has not collared me yet, but rather is training me for the time being. Shortly after meeting Him for the first time, He made a joking comment that i was "love-struck". It had not occured to me exactly the feelings i had for Sir, so i was taken aback when i realized how right He was (though i haven't told Him). Sir and i share a lot of the same energy as far as O/our beliefs and where W/we are at on many levels. Each time i talk with Him, i find myself not only growing more respect for Him, but loving Him more for who He is.
That said, i had served one before whom i did not have an emotional connection with. While i know that i am made to serve, i would feel "dirty" after playing with Him. For me, the connection has to be there or it just doesn't feel right.

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RE: Love and Submission Separate? - 2/28/2005 10:13:32 AM

Destinysskeins

Posts: 267
Joined: 7/1/2004
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Greetings,

No, i have never served a Master whom i did not come to love. Yes, my submission and my love are intertwined. i've attempted to separate the two in the past and was unable to do so much to my dismay at the time.

This being said, if i were to begin a play-based relationship now (either as a subbie, switch or Dominant party), i think i could do so with a defined separation between service and love. Perhaps this is because those needs are already fulfilled by my Master or perhaps just because of the play basis. Perhaps both!

Well wishes

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RE: Love and Submission Separate? - 2/28/2005 11:19:22 AM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
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quote:

Would any of you who have been collared to a man for any length of time (say six months), and would consider yourself his slave and deeply submitted to him, say that you don't love him?

it would be a serious lie if she said that she did not love Him.

quote:

Do you find that submission and love are correlated for you (in other words, the intensity with which you feel one leads you to feel the other) or are they completely separate?

this slave has a submissive nature and also a love for mankind in general, so, when an overwhelming desire to assist an elderly woman cross the street cannot be denied, is that from the desire to serve or the compassion for fellow man, or both? it is hard to separate the two for this slave, because love, in all it's forms can be so intertwined with service, in all of it's forms, that it becomes impossible to separate the two....guess it matters on how much control a Master allows His slave to have over her emotions, but that might not fit into one's definition of submission, so please disregard that if it creates confusion.

< Message edited by Mercnbeth -- 2/28/2005 11:21:50 AM >

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RE: Love and Submission Separate? - 2/28/2005 11:42:42 AM

ProtagonistLily

Posts: 1222
Joined: 12/27/2004
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edana wrote:
<SNIP>

quote:

Girls… can you remember when you were young, on the playground… and there was a boy… who was smart, and could draw well. Who was outspoken, and ran really fast. *smiles*… do you remember that feeling… wanting to sit next to him at assembly, or get the swing next to his at recess. Oh… just to catch his eye.

Do you remember your first “crush”? -- That… is *inside* the box. As children we are free of the trappings of “pain” and “pressure” free to – live inside that box

Free to be… “In love”

I have the hugest “crush” on my Master… *smiles* I can’t imagine living any other way.

<SNIP>

edana,

You go girl!!! Your Master is an incredibly lucky man, as are you. Revel in it, suck the marrow right out of it. It was an absolute joy to read this post.

Lily

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RE: Love and Submission Separate? - 3/2/2005 6:11:21 PM

MzBerlin

Posts: 378
Joined: 7/3/2004
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Leonidas-
This seems to be coming up a lot in posts recently, and I'm happy that you brought it up directly. (I've been lurking)
For me- submission and love go hand in hand. While I am able to bottom to someone that I don't love or have deep feelings for, I am not able to fully submit to them. I have found that I automatically submit to people that I love, regardless of the dynamic (friends/lovers) of the relationship. I usually tell people that I am "selectively submissive" and explain it with the few sentences I've typed above.
B

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