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RE: tribute? - 1/21/2007 9:40:02 AM   
DiannaVesta


Posts: 1087
Joined: 2/6/2006
From: Mid-Atlantic area
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littlesarbonn

quote:

ORIGINAL: DiannaVesta

quote:

ORIGINAL: hammernhoney

IT could be either but many use a tribute to weed the chafe from the wheat.....HH


hey sexy lady!

I agree with this. It depends on the woman and what she brings to the table. I'm just not available to spend countless hours online with a guy that THINKS he wants to be my slave.



There's a sidebar to this that I think I would like to add here. Knowing GDV and her experience and reputation in the community, if I was approaching her for the first time, and in order to spend further time, taking away from her valuable time, I was to contribute a token amount to prove I'm sincere, especially if she didn't know me from anyone else, I would have very little problem with it. That's because she HAS a reputation that proves to me she's real, she's sincere, and knowing what I know, she's pretty damn good at what she does and in everything she believes in.

The problem with tributes I find most of the time is that someone with no reputation, but maybe a hot picture, wants $50 or so in order to continue a conversation. When I was in Michigan, and I first joined Collarme.com, I saw an advertisement that seemed really sincere from a very, very beautiful woman who was located in my city. So, breaking my normal trend (that still hasn't really changed to this day), I wrote her a message, explaining my experience, perspective and what value I could bring to the table as the service submissive that I sincerely am. She responded with less than a one line response indicating that to continue the conversation, I needed to send her $75. Needless to say, we didn't continue the conversation. She has since disappeared from the site, but that honestly doesn't surprise me.

This is the dichotomy that a submissive needs to exist within. If you are contacting someone you already respect, someone like the Dianna Vestas, Tammy Jos, or Akashas, or any other number of people who are solid individuals who you know are exactly as they claim to be because of YEARS of interaction that proves who they are, then that whole tribute thing shouldn't be an issue. And it's not surprising to me that the more known, solid repuation people tend not to be the ones that people complain about when it comes to tributes. There's a reason they are respected, and in my opinion, it has little or nothing to do with money issues. It has to do with consistency, knowledge and honesty that you know you can trust them to be the same people tomorrow that they were yesterday.



Thank you D. I agree and not because I'm looking for business. The reality is I’m a smart woman capable of making a living any way I wanted. I enjoy female domination and if I can balance my time doing what I enjoy and everyone is benefiting then it’s all good. After all if I own a slave then I would expect the same… they would provide for me, help me with my bills and buy me gifts. I don’t make excuses for this because IMO that’s the way it should be.   I get so sick of hearing, “I am a successful business woman that makes my own living and I would NEVER be with a slave because of money.” I have plenty of degrees and own several businesses. Anyone that knows me knows that I am successful in most everything I do HOWEVER I still expect to be pampered, taken care of and worshiped. So when a male comes to me and wants to me to take him on a journey I figure he’s getting off pretty easy at $75.00 a month to email me, chat and talk on the phone. If he was my slave he’d be contributing a whole lot more.


  My time is valuable and I just won’t waste it on someone that can’t make a commitment. When money is involved people tend to pay attention and place worth. That’s a fact.    


_____________________________



(in reply to littlesarbonn)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: tribute? - 1/21/2007 9:41:51 AM   
DiannaVesta


Posts: 1087
Joined: 2/6/2006
From: Mid-Atlantic area
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressSassy66

quote:

ORIGINAL: all4yourplsr

I think it's a scam.  Once they get your money, they don't need you anymore. 


No....WE need your money all the time.

I'm kidding BTW.I dont need it...I just like getting it.



LOL- EXACTLY! Thats me. I don't need it. I just expect it and enjoy taking it. Plain and simple.


_____________________________



(in reply to MistressSassy66)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: tribute? - 1/21/2007 9:57:39 AM   
sissifytoserve


Posts: 1016
Joined: 8/30/2006
Status: offline 		The way I see it...if you expect money.....you better provide a SERVICE to that person who is paying you.

Otherwise...that person who is handing over his/her money is being suckered.


As for me...i'd never "pay for play".

Realistically in a relationship...you do spend money...both partners do....but that is a whole other can of worms.


Pro domination is a BUSINESS.....plain and simple. Its about making money.

Not against it....but definately not for me.

I for one can't submit to a complete stranger who has absolutely no feelings for me whatsoever.

_____________________________

A great mind must be androgynous
Samuel Coleridge

The uniting of the feminine and the masculine is the highest form of human development Carl Jung

(in reply to DiannaVesta)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: tribute? - 1/22/2007 8:00:10 AM   
undergroundsea


Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littlesarbonn
people who are solid individuals who you know are exactly as they claim to be because of YEARS of interaction that proves who they are, then that whole tribute thing shouldn't be an issue.


Your point is valid for when the primary reservation with tribute is a concern about a scam. And demand for well-known personalities may justify or even necessitate tribute.

However, there are other reasons to not wish to tribute. I see it as one might if a personal ad on a vanilla site asked for a tribute to continue the conversation, or to sustain the conversation. It just does not fit my model for the types of relationship I actively seek, which are based on mutual interest and not critically dependent on material benefit. I am more comfortable to spend more towards means that are more consistent with my relationship goals. For me, tribute is more relevant for a relationship that carries a sense of anonymity where I present more my role than my self.

While tribute may help lessen the number of insincere persons, I think it still lets through insincere persons and rules out sincere ones.

Cheers,

Sea

(in reply to littlesarbonn)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: tribute? - 1/22/2007 8:02:25 AM   
undergroundsea


Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DiannaVesta
So when a male comes to me and wants to me to take him on a journey I figure he’s getting off pretty easy at $75.00 a month to email me, chat and talk on the phone. If he was my slave he’d be contributing a whole lot more.


My time is valuable and I just won’t waste it on someone that can’t make a commitment. When money is involved people tend to pay attention and place worth. That’s a fact.    


If you don't mind commenting, I am curious how the tribute matter applies to female submissives who approach dommes.

Cheers,

Sea

< Message edited by undergroundsea -- 1/22/2007 8:23:12 AM >

(in reply to DiannaVesta)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: tribute? - 1/22/2007 11:02:57 AM   
MistressSassy66


Posts: 1675
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DiannaVesta

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressSassy66

quote:

ORIGINAL: all4yourplsr

I think it's a scam.  Once they get your money, they don't need you anymore. 


No....WE need your money all the time.

I'm kidding BTW.I dont need it...I just like getting it.



LOL- EXACTLY! Thats me. I don't need it. I just expect it and enjoy taking it. Plain and simple.



I love that Attitude 
Hows that go...Great Minds think alike 

_____________________________

Mistress Sassy

http://www.mistresssassy.com

In the Immortal Words of Bob....Fuck the dumb shit.

"I love you not only for what you are,But for what I am when I'm with you."- Opening line from a poem by Roy Croft

(in reply to DiannaVesta)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: tribute? - 1/22/2007 11:11:56 AM   
wyldsubmissive


Posts: 157
Joined: 5/7/2005
Status: offline 		 
quote:


I love that Attitude 
Hows that go...Great Minds think alike 


Not to be... rude, Mistress Sassy, but it is my opinion that great minds think for themselves.

-Wyld

(in reply to MistressSassy66)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: tribute? - 1/22/2007 1:23:34 PM   
MistressSassy66


Posts: 1675
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline 		Okay so maybe there is some truth to that.
Thing is though it was taking out of context it was meant in the conext that" birds of a feather flock together"...remember there is safety in numbers.

Great Minds discuss ideas.
Average minds discuss events.
Small minds discuss people.

The above is the way I see it.
So when I say Great Minds think alike,that is what I mean.

Oh and BTW ...people being rude is something I've grown accustomed to,kinda have too with this site at times....  LOL  

_____________________________

Mistress Sassy

http://www.mistresssassy.com

In the Immortal Words of Bob....Fuck the dumb shit.

"I love you not only for what you are,But for what I am when I'm with you."- Opening line from a poem by Roy Croft

(in reply to wyldsubmissive)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: tribute? - 1/22/2007 2:58:38 PM   
GuidingLite


Posts: 233
Joined: 12/10/2006
Status: offline 		to all you HATERS of professional women that are lucky enough to make some cash doing what they love, dont be jealous they wont play with you for free.  if they were attracted to you they would.  But they arent. so they wont.  Either pay them and get your play on or quite whinning coz they wont play with you for free.  You just dont appeal to them enough for them to want to play with you for free.  Get over it.

(in reply to freetime05)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: tribute? - 1/22/2007 4:17:19 PM   
Solinear


Posts: 283
Joined: 1/8/2007
Status: offline 		Me?  I could care less.

I enjoy the way many people will state that all people have the same standard, but the moment I consider the thought of most men requiring a tribute of their subs/slaves, I think of a master that is sub/slaveless... or has male sub/slaves.

Some people will call it prostitution, others will call you whores.  Personally, I hate the fact that prostitution is illegal.  No, not because I want to hire one, but because it is the *only* activity that you can do legally for free, but the minute you start paying for it, it's illegal in the vast majority of the world.  I would much rather see it institutionalized, taxed and regulated.  The minute they pay $100 in taxes per 30-60 minute session and the pros pay to have a license that requires regular (monthly) health check-ups, it's not going to be a "You want a date?" situation with drug addicts being one of the larger portions of those engaging in the profession.  When someone can avoid a trip to jail by going to a legal  prostitute that they know is clean, some will still try to 'get a date', but the majority will avoid the dangers and spend a little more money.

That's just me on my soapbox though.  I still could care less if she demands tribute.  I also can obviously care less if she charges $200 an hour and rides you like Secretariat (before he died, hopefully).  Not my life, not my business.

(in reply to GuidingLite)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: tribute? - 1/22/2007 4:53:07 PM   
MistressSassy66


Posts: 1675
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline 		The thing about being identified as a prostitute for bondage sessions floors Me.
Or how about the no strings attached housekeeper,does that qualify as prostitution I wonder.Probally not as no monies are exchanged but a service is provided.

I have a set of standards for Pro sessions and Personal sessions.

MY Pro sessions are not about sex...they are about cross dressing,overcoming fears of being themselves,they need to be spanked/whipped til they cry to let the stress out,they need to feel needed when serving coffee or doing housework.
It gives them a purpose whether they pay or not.
People think its not personal with a paying submissive,I get attached(to regulars) and offer aftercare with compassion to everyone just as I would bishop.The dynamics of that relationship(the ones who pay) has a broader meaning than most think.

_____________________________

Mistress Sassy

http://www.mistresssassy.com

In the Immortal Words of Bob....Fuck the dumb shit.

"I love you not only for what you are,But for what I am when I'm with you."- Opening line from a poem by Roy Croft

(in reply to Solinear)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: tribute? - 1/22/2007 7:40:36 PM   
undergroundsea


Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GuidingLite
to all you HATERS of professional women that are lucky enough to make some cash doing what they love, dont be jealous they wont play with you for free.  if they were attracted to you they would.  But they arent. so they wont.  Either pay them and get your play on or quite whinning coz they wont play with you for free.  You just dont appeal to them enough for them to want to play with you for free.  Get over it.


It is not fully clear at whom your comment is directed, and I am wondering if it is driven by frustration from other threads. It appears to be in response to the original post but I have learned to not give much weight to the in reply to tag on collarme.

I think the question in the OP is a fair one and does not suggest hatred for professional domination. And I do not see the OP to be about professional domination.

Tribute does not necessarily mean compensation for professional domination. In the context I read from the OP's words, it refers to a demand for money in order to have or sustain a conversation. I have received these demands upon sending an introductory email and some of these demands had signs of a scam. So I think it is fair to ask if one sends the money per these demands, will he ever hear from the person again. I think some of these demands come from dommes seeking submissives, some come from scammers, some come from persons who fit each description.

I think there are two sides to most stories. There are good and bad persons presenting themselves as sub and dommes. I think a case can be made for asking for tribute. I think a case can be made for being against tribute. Just as dommes can become frustrated with their experiences with persons seeking only sexual gratification, subs can become frustrated with their experiences with persons seeking only financial gratification.

I have not sought professional domination and do not seek it at the moment. Still, I have and have had different forms of social relationships with many people in the BDSM professional industry. Based on the professional dommes I personally know and on the benefit I see professional domination to provide, I hold professional dommes in good regard. Based on my observations about human nature, I think I would not give the same regard to any person who is a professional domme. And I think the term professional is also used as broadly as the term tribute; I do not think every person who demands some form of financial compensation for dominance can be credited to be a professional domme.

My two cents.

Cheers,

Sea

< Message edited by undergroundsea -- 1/22/2007 8:32:36 PM >

(in reply to GuidingLite)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: tribute? - 1/22/2007 7:44:06 PM   
GuidingLite


Posts: 233
Joined: 12/10/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressSassy66

The thing about being identified as a prostitute for bondage sessions floors Me.
Or how about the no strings attached housekeeper,does that qualify as prostitution I wonder.Probally not as no monies are exchanged but a service is provided.

I have a set of standards for Pro sessions and Personal sessions.

MY Pro sessions are not about sex...they are about cross dressing,overcoming fears of being themselves,they need to be spanked/whipped til they cry to let the stress out,they need to feel needed when serving coffee or doing housework.
It gives them a purpose whether they pay or not.
People think its not personal with a paying submissive,I get attached(to regulars) and offer aftercare with compassion to everyone just as I would bishop.The dynamics of that relationship(the ones who pay) has a broader meaning than most think.


That's it! :)

(in reply to MistressSassy66)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: tribute? - 1/22/2007 7:45:19 PM   
GuidingLite


Posts: 233
Joined: 12/10/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Solinear

Me?  I could care less.

I enjoy the way many people will state that all people have the same standard, but the moment I consider the thought of most men requiring a tribute of their subs/slaves, I think of a master that is sub/slaveless... or has male sub/slaves.

Some people will call it prostitution, others will call you whores.  Personally, I hate the fact that prostitution is illegal.  No, not because I want to hire one, but because it is the *only* activity that you can do legally for free, but the minute you start paying for it, it's illegal in the vast majority of the world.  I would much rather see it institutionalized, taxed and regulated.  The minute they pay $100 in taxes per 30-60 minute session and the pros pay to have a license that requires regular (monthly) health check-ups, it's not going to be a "You want a date?" situation with drug addicts being one of the larger portions of those engaging in the profession.  When someone can avoid a trip to jail by going to a legal  prostitute that they know is clean, some will still try to 'get a date', but the majority will avoid the dangers and spend a little more money.

That's just me on my soapbox though.  I still could care less if she demands tribute.  I also can obviously care less if she charges $200 an hour and rides you like Secretariat (before he died, hopefully).  Not my life, not my business.

 
well said Solinear.


(can't believe there's actually a man here who likes women)

< Message edited by GuidingLite -- 1/22/2007 7:47:11 PM >

(in reply to Solinear)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: tribute? - 1/22/2007 8:04:48 PM   
undergroundsea


Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GuidingLite
well said Solinear.
(can't believe there's actually a man here who likes women)


I am curious to hear the intellectual basis behind your position, for as it is I do not see it.

Why does this thread make you feel professional domination is being attacked?

Why do you think all men who have posted to this thread excepting Solinear do not like women?

I think a post that expresses your views and why you feel that way will have more substance than one that attacks anyone who does not perfectly agree with you.

Cheers,

Sea

(in reply to GuidingLite)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: tribute? - 1/22/2007 8:59:21 PM   
savannasub


Posts: 32
Joined: 12/3/2006
Status: offline 		Dude I dont think she cares you disagree, cheers.

(in reply to undergroundsea)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: tribute? - 1/22/2007 9:26:08 PM   
undergroundsea


Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: savannasub

Dude I dont think she cares you disagree, cheers.


Dude, you must see something I don't. Then what do you think drives the attacks?

Cheers,

Sea

(in reply to savannasub)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: tribute? - 1/23/2007 7:19:23 AM   
openmindedslave


Posts: 470
Joined: 2/27/2005
Status: offline 		let us look at it from a submissives stand point. -At least one view.
As a submissive/slave, there are many advantages to seeing a prodom.

The first being the non involvment side. If people just read the lifestyle profiles out here , many times, the common thread is they are treated  like a prodom. Meaning they change their schedules, they prepare the setting  and maybe...maybe  the sub/slave shows up... maybe. If he does, great. If he doesn/'t , well you know the rest.  The reality is  many they meet out here are not going to commit to a dom . They are not even going to take them out to dinner or get involved with their lives outside of playing behind closed doors. For many lifestyle doms, this life is  importain , but so is  companionship  and  yes, a person to come home to as in a husband or other. Most so called subs/slaves will  not committ their lives to a realtionship, but to a few hours of play here and there. In some cases the lifestyle dom, may see their enjoyment controlled more by the subs scheduling than  their own. Alot of lifestyle get burned out here, because they are not looking for monies but something deeper.

As with a Prodom,  the money makes it clear from the start ,. You are hiring a professional to give you a service. You don't have to meet their family or  take them to dinner. If your cheating on your spouse, many Prodoms are able to work with your schedule. The Prodom may have more equipment to play. And depending on the subs/slaves resources , he may beable to meet  a professional on rather short notice while on a vacation or business trip. Shame expedia doesn't include doms in making  travel arrangements lol

All of this is not to say a prodom can not give of their self too.They can share their personal life outside of play. Talk about their kids and  home repairs if there is a level of trust. Also ,realize from a sub postion that its not realistic that a 50 year old guy is going to find a 19 year old Mistress who wants to marry and dom him 24/7.Yes there are exceptions, but not enought of them. Also ,not only those subs/slaves who do show up for a play date may pay. the other issue is how many come back? Or  how about the training they must go through to learn the newest  fetishes or equipment on the market? Or the wardrobes or  role playing ideas that get more and more intense?

And yes, it is true any woman can call them selves a pro. And life the vanilla world, you don't find the right person on the first date. It takes time. A prodom is easy to find.just click and email
A good Prodom  wil be a lucky find. But a great one...you will know it .

(in reply to undergroundsea)
Profile   Post #: 38
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