what do i do about lack of contact

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

what do i do about lack of contact

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> what do i do about lack of contact

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 6:41:41 AM

neveralone

Posts: 12
Joined: 11/17/2006
Status: offline

hi
i met a Dom from this site at weekend, he said everything was really good, he said before we met that he wanted to take everything to the next level, now he is not talking to me at all.

did i do somthing wrong?

na

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 6:58:10 AM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

obviously?

You expect a reasonable dissertation?

Ron

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to neveralone)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 6:58:23 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: neveralone
hi
i met a Dom from this site at weekend, he said everything was really good, he said before we met that he wanted to take everything to the next level, now he is not talking to me at all.

did i do somthing wrong?

na

I have no idea if you did something wrong.

However, it is extremely common for someone to pull someone along for a first date from the net to get some fun and then drop off the face of the earth- whether it's because they are married, too scared to have a serious relationship, or too scared to just be honest that there was no chemistry and they really don't want to keep going...who knows.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to neveralone)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 7:18:15 AM

WorldofSilence

Posts: 114
Joined: 6/14/2006
Status: offline

I'm afraid this happens.

However if it's been a day or two, maybe giving the benefit of the doubt might work, just remember to set a limit amount of time, it's just recently happened to Me, I waited for about 3 something odd weeks, with no contact then I pulled the plug as I can't be bothered with someone who is that rude.

Give them the benefit of the doubt, unless it has already been a while, chalk it up as experince do what you need to do to feel better.

WoS

_____________________________

"Beware Hearing loss. If found please return to owner.Been missing since 1981. Reward on return"

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 7:21:45 AM

meatcleaver

Posts: 9030
Joined: 3/13/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: neveralone

hi
i met a Dom from this site at weekend, he said everything was really good, he said before we met that he wanted to take everything to the next level, now he is not talking to me at all.

did i do somthing wrong?

na

You've just learnt a lesson that online is for suckers. If you carry on with online you will probably find that people switching off their computer or changing handle to avoid someone they've made overtures and promises to as completely normal.

You are much better off finding someone in r/l where you can look them in the eye.

_____________________________

There are fascists who consider themselves humanitarians, like cannibals on a health kick, eating only vegetarians.

(in reply to neveralone)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 7:33:25 AM

WorldofSilence

Posts: 114
Joined: 6/14/2006
Status: offline

Ahhh well then I'm pretty doomed in your eyes meatcleaver aren't I?

*chuckles* r/l encounters are nothing short of annoying and frustrating for someone like Me, I diagree that it is for suckers as you put it, for some people who find going to munchies difficult because of access problems or communication problems etc.. this is a godsend. I have the power of copy and paste, and I don't need to be a parrot every time I meet someone in the real world :)

Yep I'm talking of the D/s, M/s,BDSM etc etc minirotity of disabled people.

WoS - Flag bearer of Deafies and BDSM accessabiltiy for disabled people. :P

_____________________________

"Beware Hearing loss. If found please return to owner.Been missing since 1981. Reward on return"

(in reply to meatcleaver)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 7:44:26 AM

CreativeDominant

Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: neveralone

hi
i met a Dom from this site at weekend, he said everything was really good, he said before we met that he wanted to take everything to the next level, now he is not talking to me at all.

did i do somthing wrong?
na

Given the brevity of your post, it is difficult to say. You give no specifics as to your behavior or his nor to your activities. With no information other than that given above, I can't give you an answer...the best I could do is repeat some of what LA said and maybe add a few more reasons...perhaps you went ahead and played with him, he had his fun and now he's done and on to the next; perhaps you came on too strong and it scared him, etc..

As an aside...meatcleaver, I can identify with the disappointment of some of the people a person meets through online and then goes over to real life with. Many times, they cannot follow through with what they say they are/do/want/desire. But...so are many people we meet in real life. I've had my heart broken by someone who I first met online. But...I also had my heart broken by someone I met in person and never had an online moment with. While the net can allow for bad behavior in a myriad of ways different than real life, there is nothing about real life that doesn;t afford some people that same opportunity to be jerks, cheaters, abusers, and heartbreakers.

(in reply to neveralone)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 7:57:26 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

It's called pooferation!

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to CreativeDominant)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 8:04:59 AM

domiguy

Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: neveralone

hi
i met a Dom from this site at weekend, he said everything was really good, he said before we met that he wanted to take everything to the next level, now he is not talking to me at all.

did i do somthing wrong?

na

Yes. What ever went wrong is all your fault. All you baby...You will find that guys are rarely wrong...Whatever you did wrong don't do it again or you will never find happiness and will be miserable your whole life.

I pity you.

out.

D.G.

p.s. Jesus please protect me from your followers.

< Message edited by domiguy -- 1/19/2007 8:05:36 AM >

(in reply to neveralone)

Profile

Post #: 9

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 8:22:24 AM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: neveralone

hi
i met a Dom from this site at weekend, he said everything was really good, he said before we met that he wanted to take everything to the next level, now he is not talking to me at all.

did i do somthing wrong?

na

Wouldn't it be wonderful it it was something you did wrong?

Then you could figure it out, work on yourself, and make sure it never happened again.

I can so relate to that power we can feel when we try to take the blame for eveything that happens to us.

I had to learn through a long process that often it has nothing to do with us, sometimes it does. It can be difficult to see which is the truth, the reality is often a combination of both.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to neveralone)

Profile

Post #: 10

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 9:05:13 AM

toservez

Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: neveralone

hi
i met a Dom from this site at weekend, he said everything was really good, he said before we met that he wanted to take everything to the next level, now he is not talking to me at all.

did i do somthing wrong?

na

How can you have done something wrong if you were being you?

Who knows his reasons and I would suggest not get bothered by it. Personally I cannot reccomend enough for people who start out online to never ever get emotions involved unitl you have met the person physically. Use online as a tool for information gathering and some guage of compatibility and chemistry but never get any expectations unitl you meet.

_____________________________

I am sorry I do not fit Webster's defintion of a slave but thankfully my Master is not Webster.

"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned." - H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama

(in reply to neveralone)

Profile

Post #: 11

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 9:13:03 AM

FelinePersuasion

Posts: 4792
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline

meeting someone in real life is no more a guarentee they're real, true, great, kind, or won't kick ya to the curb after the first date.

People who are assholes, or time wasters, or any number of lables will be so online or off. Looking them in the eye will not guarentee other wise.

I've met plenty of people in real life face to face in person and had them do the whole disapere after making prommises thing.

It's notunique to online only.

quote:

ORIGINAL: meatcleaver

You've just learnt a lesson that online is for suckers. If you carry on with online you will probably find that people switching off their computer or changing handle to avoid someone they've made overtures and promises to as completely normal.

You are much better off finding someone in r/l where you can look them in the eye.

(in reply to meatcleaver)

Profile

Post #: 12

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 9:17:36 AM

justheather

Posts: 1532
Joined: 10/4/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: meatcleaver
You've just learnt a lesson that online is for suckers.

Huh. Guess that makes me a sucker.

But, if having r/l l/t relationship with an amazing, intelligent, honest, caring, spiritual and creative Dom (whom I just happened to have met and gotten to know intially online) makes me a sucker, well, what the heck, call me Lolly and tattoo the word Dum-Dums across my ass, I'll take being a sucker any day.

You will meet "players" everywhere. Chalk it up to experience and next time you'll be the wiser. There are good people, as well as jerks, online.

_____________________________

I want the scissors to be sharp
And the table perfectly level
When you cut me out of my life
And paste me in that book you always carry.
-Billy Collins

(in reply to meatcleaver)

Profile

Post #: 13

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 10:09:19 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

quote:

call me Lolly

Get your adverbs here....

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to justheather)

Profile

Post #: 14

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 10:19:19 AM

childofpain

Posts: 44
Joined: 1/16/2007
Status: offline

but what if i suck well????

(in reply to KatyLied)

Profile

Post #: 15

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 10:22:44 AM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

No one will be paying attention to your use of adverbs so it will work out pretty good for you in that regard, I think.

Ron

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to childofpain)

Profile

Post #: 16

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 10:35:53 AM

dawntreader

Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: childofpain

but what if i suck well????

LMAO!!!

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to childofpain)

Profile

Post #: 17

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 10:39:36 AM

Domisub

Posts: 3
Joined: 1/9/2007
Status: offline

n

< Message edited by Domisub -- 1/19/2007 10:42:55 AM >

(in reply to dawntreader)

Profile

Post #: 18

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 10:45:07 AM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline

I wouldn't worry.
I tend to think that guys I meet just want to get into my panties.
Then, once I picture them in my panties, I don't have that desire to submit.

After that it is just a friendly date until we decide if we want more. It at least helps me find out who the flakes are, right off the bat.
Kyst

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley

(in reply to neveralone)

Profile

Post #: 19

RE: what do i do about lack of contact - 1/19/2007 10:52:52 AM

BRNaughtyAngel