BitaTruble
Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: VerySpankable1
It has been sometime since I opened a profile on collarme.com. I was sent here by another submissive woman who thought I would find what I was looking for here.
Your profile and journal entries are full of contradictions, so how is one supposed to know what it is that you are really looking for here?
On the one hand you state:
"i would like to explain that i am only here to find friends and be part of the community."
In that same journal entry you state:
"Searching for someone to join our family and in return we will give them experience in seeing and playing with a M/s couple."
That's a contradiction. Two statements diametrically opposed to one another. Are you looking for friends or a play partner?
quote:
Anyway, the reason for this post is to ask other submissive women why there is so much hesitation with answering e-mails on here.
I have been in the lifestyle for nearly 7 years now and don't understand why people who claim to live this lifestyle, want to join or find a couple, are not even interested in responding to e-mails.
If it hasn't occured to you by now, might I suggest that the people you have written to just aren't interested in answering 'your' emails. That doesn't mean they don't answer those who do interest them.
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I have never been rude or even been obscene for that matter. I am a very kind and generous person and is only asking whether there is interest.
From your journal:
"If you recieve an e-mail have the freakin respect to either say, not interested or even to say fuck off...lol..."
Some might consider that rather rude.
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Every e-mail that is sent to me whether rude or not I always respond to.
That's 'your' way. That doesn't mean everyone else does things 'your' way. They do things their way. It's really as simple as that.
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Is it just because I have a little more respect or tolerance for such things. I don't have that much time on my hands but do find the time to answer any e-mails that are sent to me.
Some people don't want to waste their time on corresponding with those who they already know aren't right for them. They are not obligated to do so and no answer 'is' an answer. Even a response to an unsolicted email can encourage people to keep trying, so it's often in the best interest of someone to just ignore those emails which don't interest them rather than get pulled into some sort of drama which, perhaps, 'they' don't have the time for.
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Just wondering because I have sent many out, which have been months since, and have not received an answer to any even though i see that they have read them or they are online.
Within a few days of joining, you post a journal entry saying you will be gone for two weeks. When you come back, you are heading into the holiday season with Halloween, Xmas and the rest. You stated that you don't want to chat, don't have time to chat .. so people might read that as you don't have time for 'them' either. The end of the year is a very busy time for a whole lot of people .. you don't have time for them to even chat.. well, they don't have time for you to even write back.
Also, you have been in your relationship for a year. That's not very long, so to go searching for a beta submissive (and they are a premium with couples being a glut) you need to really shine, to stand out above the rest and frankly, from your profile, your journal entries and now this rather whiney forum post, you don't stand out so why should people contact you just because they interest you? Obviously, you don't interest them or they would have returned your emails. You don't appear to offer any incentive either via your profile or your journal to give someone a reason to contact you. You tell them up front, they won't be long term, you are not the people with whom they will spend the rest of their life and you are just looking for experiences and experiences are all you offer in return. Experiences are a dime a dozen and can be had at any local dungeon or play event for the price of admission. Couple that with stating that you've sent out numerous emails and it can make one feel as though they are not special, really don't have any value other than as a play thing for you and your Master and pretty much no matter what they may do with you, they're not going to be allowed to stick around for the long haul.
In other words.. I think you're trying to lay blame on the wrong people. It's not the submissives to whom you are writing that are the problem ... it's you.
To attract the sort of submissive you want, you have to be the sort of person that submissive will be attracted to. Right now, that would be someone who is attracted to a whiney, bitchy, self-indulgent alpha with a chip on her shoulder who only wants someone they can use and then discard when they are done.
Granted, there are people out there who will be attracted to that, but, it's rather obvious you're not writing to them.
This was written in the spirit of constructive criticism but I seriously doubt it will be taken that way. Just keep in mind that I don't know you so am very objective when it comes to reading your entries and journal. Others may have a whole different take on it and if so, you'll probably hear from them and LA might even come around and send forth 100 links on this exact same topic. She's got more stamina than I do.
Celeste
_____________________________
"Oh, so it's just like Rock, paper, scissors." He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."
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