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Where's the line - 1/25/2007 4:05:14 PM   
MakeItTight


Posts: 9
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline 		From what I've heard there is a line between a dom/sub and an actual relationship. Maybe I'm being naive, but is there anyone else who wants a relationship with their dom/sub, instead of keeping them as a 2nd life.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Where's the line - 1/25/2007 4:21:02 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		You're not naive, just unaware. There's lots of us who live 24/7 and this is WHO we are, not just WHAT we do.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to MakeItTight)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Where's the line - 1/25/2007 4:24:41 PM   
LadyJulieAnn


Posts: 979
Joined: 6/29/2005
Status: offline 		I'm in a long-term, loving relationship with my sub, and it's working quite well.

Be well,
Julie

(in reply to MakeItTight)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Where's the line - 1/25/2007 4:28:24 PM   
Coupleseeking321


Posts: 43
Joined: 1/1/2007
Status: offline 		I dated my Master before I introduced him to the lifestyle. We live together and plan to marry when I graduate. I couldn't be happier.

(in reply to LadyJulieAnn)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Where's the line - 1/25/2007 4:41:25 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		you have been talking to a very select few, my friend---

Believe me, it is all over the map.

Ron(ne)


_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to MakeItTight)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Where's the line - 1/25/2007 5:15:50 PM   
beltainefaerie


Posts: 610
Joined: 4/15/2006
Status: offline 		I think that they are all relationships, just various kinds.  However, I'm sure you didn't post to play games with semanics.  (I can't help it, I'm a teacher.)  In any event, many people have romantic relationships, even marriages in D/s relationships.  Others have separate romantic relationships and merely play with BDSM roles/activities in side relationships, at play parties or with professionals.  Others are poly and have all sorts of relationships going on.

My husband is not my Dom, because he is vanilla.  I have several casual play partners that I create scenes with occasionally plus a Master and sisterslave that I have an ongoing relationship with.  While it is not romantic in the traditional sense, we love each other and are quite bonded.  The same is true for my brat. 

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Where's the line - 1/25/2007 5:44:25 PM   
redwall2001962


Posts: 28
Joined: 1/24/2007
Status: offline 		Hello! New to this whole way of life. I would love to find a Mistress or as I would like to think a Queen or Goddess to Adore and Serve as a life time lover,  best friend and with luck my Wife too. I really don't want to find one that will degrade me or humiliate me in front of my family and friends or coworks either. In other words people that don't understand this bond that we would have. I'm just starting to wonder if I'm looking in the right spot even here. It seems to me that most of these Mistresses just want someone they can ridicule for there own selfesteem or they want payed for it which is fine for a lot of the people that just want to play at this for what ever reason they might have.
I'm just wondering if there are any Mistresses out there that are kind and loving and treat their sumissive lovers with respect and thoughtfulness.
Or should I just go check myself into an Asylum.LOL. It almost seems that I do not fit in with the way people think as normal or with what people consider deviate. 
So I guess I must be (deviater) LOL. Thanks
P.S. This is just one of the more pressing thoughts I've come to realize I should find out more on.
Thanks again. 

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Where's the line - 1/25/2007 5:54:45 PM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline 		My male sub and I are also in a loving relationship. For me that is how I prefer and so does he. For us one without the other just doesn't work.

~Lashra


_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”






(in reply to redwall2001962)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Where's the line - 1/25/2007 10:55:54 PM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		That depends on the Mistress/Master and their desires.
I have long term-submissives and also more casual play
partners.  Read through the various forums here and
use the Search button to find specific topics and more
information.
 
Good luck in your search.

_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE


http://KinkMeet.co.uk

(in reply to MakeItTight)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Where's the line - 1/26/2007 6:15:42 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		I've owned Fox for seven years and we certainly have a relationship.

I told him when he was taking me out for Valentine's Day (that evening after work) and I gave him to restaurants to consider (so it will be a minor surprise for me). We do all sorts of "relationship" stuff, even romantic stuff, the big difference is that I have that authority to make the decisions if I so choose.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to MakeItTight)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Where's the line - 1/26/2007 12:21:42 PM   
LadyOunce


Posts: 126
Joined: 10/18/2006
Status: offline 		You hear about said relationships less in the public as those in them don't tend to make the news, nor do they have websites advertising their services and such. But if you look at many reputable D/s sites, they are often run by lifestyle couples/triads/etc who are a relationship that either centers around and/or includes their D/s.

_____________________________

Above all, be true to yourself, and if you cannot put your heart in it, take yourself out of it. -Jackson

Few are those who see with their own eyes and feel with their own hearts. -Einstein

Do not consider painful what is good for you. -Medea

(in reply to MakeItTight)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Where's the line - 1/30/2007 11:00:17 PM   
MakeItTight


Posts: 9
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline 		It's a relief to hear that there is more to the BDSM scene than just lust.

Thanks all-

(in reply to LadyOunce)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Where's the line - 1/30/2007 11:06:42 PM   
sarbonn


Posts: 203
Joined: 3/23/2004
Status: offline 		There are all sorts of relationships that meet all sorts of different definitions. The problem comes in trying to define them in simple terms so that everyone falls into set definitions.

_____________________________

Give a man a fish, he eats for a day...
...teach a man to fish, he steals your fishing hole and then charges you for the fish.

(in reply to MakeItTight)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Where's the line - 1/31/2007 3:00:05 AM   
MissSunita


Posts: 4
Joined: 1/31/2007
Status: offline 		To me there is no relationships beyond me telling my slaves what work to do and them serving me. They are slaves and servants not my equals. I think you can only have a social relationship with equals and not inferiors

(in reply to sarbonn)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Where's the line - 1/31/2007 3:39:47 AM   
bandit25


Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline 		I think Ron was correct.  You have been talking to a select few.  Expand that crowd.

(in reply to MakeItTight)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Where's the line - 3/17/2007 4:19:07 PM   
jamesthehumanrug


Posts: 668
Joined: 10/21/2005
Status: offline 		dear makittite
in re to your question and picture posted
you look so natural as is,....
if it comes natural; it lasts, for real- what else is there?!
quote:

ORIGINAL: MakeItTight

From what I've heard there is a line between a dom/sub and an actual relationship. Maybe I'm being naive, but is there anyone else who wants a relationship with their dom/sub, instead of keeping them as a 2nd life.


_____________________________

I REMAIN RESPECTFULLY SUBMITTED
,LOVEles,
jamesthehumanrug

(in reply to MakeItTight)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Where's the line - 3/17/2007 4:31:08 PM   
BeachMystress


Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
Status: offline
You were misinformed. Many people want intimate involvement with their submissive. Before I married, I rarely bothered to keep a sub who wasn't also my "romantic interest." Now, my husband and I live in a D/s relationship 24/7/365. The easiest way to describe our relationship to people is that we have a traditional 1950's marriage, with him in the wife role. The only difference is that my "wife" doesn't wear girl clothes and does go to work. Any other subs I'd bring into our lives would be non romantic. It just depends upon the goals of the people involved.






_____________________________

Beach Mystress
*Do not threaten the weak. Intimidate the strong. ~ Stevenson*
http://beachmystress.jigsy.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/beachmystress/

(in reply to MakeItTight)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Where's the line - 3/17/2007 7:30:01 PM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline 		I am in a long term loving D/s relationship with my male sub. We are very happy together and as this works for us we have no plans to change our relationship.  Now some other couples may prefer not to have romantic feelings involved in their dynamic and if that makes them happy, more power to them. I just know that it would not work for me.

~Lashra


_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”






(in reply to BeachMystress)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Where's the line - 3/17/2007 8:00:44 PM   
freakgoddess


Posts: 48
Joined: 8/19/2006
Status: offline 		there are very definitely those of us who prefer to be in a relationship rather than just being play partners.  but there are alot of people out there who are just looking for play partners as well.

< Message edited by freakgoddess -- 3/17/2007 8:01:32 PM >

(in reply to MakeItTight)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Where's the line - 3/17/2007 8:38:48 PM   
cloudboy


Posts: 7306
Joined: 12/14/2005
Status: offline
I would say that the line for relationships v. a strict BDSM role lies between submissive and slave.

A Domme will have a submissive based on the person he is and the relationship she can have with him, but a slave's primary purpose is to fufill a specific role to a Domme --- wherein his personhood is of secondary importance.

This is my abstract take on the question.

(in reply to MakeItTight)
Profile   Post #: 20
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