RE: someone please just listen to me

RE: someone please just listen to me (Full Version)

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hisannabelle -> RE: someone please just listen to me (1/31/2007 6:00:59 PM)
congratulations! i must say that i think it's amazing that you are doing this, and that this positive, beautiful thing could come out of a relationship that may have been more than incredibly difficult. i wish you the best of luck...i hope your friends and family can come to be understanding and supportive as well, whether they agree with your decisions or not.

thekajiracat -> RE: someone please just listen to me (1/31/2007 6:32:56 PM)
to everyone...thank you so much. my new daughters name is Isabella, for those who asked. also, indeed i am a woman and so is my ex...so no need for a dna test. (i'm good, but not that darn good, haha) i have already started the legal proceedings in regards to the adoption. as of right now i have temporary custody and primary placement of her. all legal ends should be taken care of fairly quickly. again, thank you all for the words of advice and encouragement. i truly appreciate it. i havent had a chance to spend much time here in the forums but you all have shown such kindness, and to me, a stranger...i think ill hang around a bit...love to you all!!

thekajiracat -> RE: someone please just listen to me (1/31/2007 6:42:24 PM)
oh yes, and the other issue. the father? tell me and her birth mother who it is and i guess we will all know...all ive gotten out of her about him is that he was at a party in a club in atlanta..and he had blue eyes. so that narrows it down, eh? my lawyer says the adoption will progress fairly smoothly and rapidly in comparison to other adoptions, being that social services got involved immediately, as did the family court branch. ive got the law and all of its agencies behind me so all thats left is to dot those i's and cross those t's. and to answer another question...i wish her mother the best of luck in life. i wish her no harm. whether she gets sober is of no concern of mine, thats up to her to deal with. luckily for Isabella and myself, we dont have to ride the roller coaster with her. i hope one day she does clean her act up, and i will by no means keep her daughter from her, ever, however my main concern is for the child, now my daughter. i will shield her and protect her from all that may harm her, even her own birth mother. thank you all again...you havent a clue about how much all of your thoughts have helped me through today. wierd thing, is it possible that i have post partum mood swings? i dont know...but i know im exhausted, and the highlight of my day was a shower...and not a "speed shower" either...a real true to life shower. WOOHOO! thank you all so much....really and truly made today a better day for me and in essence a better day for my daughter. love to you all!

MstrssScarlet -> RE: someone please just listen to me (1/31/2007 6:56:09 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: thekajiracat wierd thing, is it possible that i have post partum mood swings? i dont know...but i know im exhausted, and the highlight of my day was a shower...and not a "speed shower" either...a real true to life shower. WOOHOO! thank you all so much....really and truly made today a better day for me and in essence a better day for my daughter. love to you all! No matter how much you love your new daughter, it's always a totally exhausting schedule those first few months. I hope someone in your family finally comes around and is willing to help you get a break now and then. When you mentioned that the child was a girl, an old saying came to mind: A son is your son until he takes a wife; a daughter is your daughter all of her life. I wish nothing but the best for you and your children. Mistress Scarlet

KatyLied -> RE: someone please just listen to me (1/31/2007 7:01:11 PM)
quote: the highlight of my day was a shower.. It's official - you are definitely a new mommy. You chose a beautiful name for your daughter. I'm glad to hear that you have an attorney and are doing things the right way, you need to make sure everything is in place legally in order to protect your new family.

VoiceOfReason -> RE: someone please just listen to me (1/31/2007 7:03:11 PM)
To act in the defense of a child, plucking them from a dangerous situation, is noble. My advice, ask those who deride what you are doing now what they would have you do instead or differently. They may well have some valid concerns as to your emotional involvement or even your preparedness you should calculate into what you are about to do. However, if they continue to focus on the negative, if they have nothing more to offer you than to give you Hell for acting with honor and attempt to convince you to be less instead of helping you be more and better...challenge them to provide you with something constructive or step out of the way. Good luck to you.

RosaB -> RE: someone please just listen to me (1/31/2007 7:43:44 PM)
Isabella is a beautiful name, it also was my beloved baby sister's middle name. The name of which, as a kid, I wanted to trade with my younger sister; long story, I won't bore the world with all the details, but, I have the Isa at the beginning of my middle name as well. I'm happy to hear that you've found some comfort from the words offered on this forum thus far. Rosa

thekajiracat -> RE: someone please just listen to me (2/1/2007 4:58:55 PM)
once again thank you to you all for the support regarding my decision to adopt this child. every second with her is a new blessing for me. for anyone interested, i have a few pictures of her. if you would like to see her, please just email me here on CM and i will reply with her picture. thank you all again.

texancutie -> RE: someone please just listen to me (2/1/2007 5:01:50 PM)
Congrats to you. It is great to read that you are doing something wonderful for the baby!

CandleInTheWind -> RE: someone please just listen to me (2/1/2007 8:13:56 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: thekajiracat my ex, her mother, was a very abusive alcoholic. while she did abstain from drugs and alcohol during her pregnancy, she returned right back to her old tricks. she called me when she was in labor and asked me to come. i was there for her through that, the birth and the days following that the baby spent in the NICU. (she was fine, just had a temp drop) after bringing her home, (to her own home, not mine) she asked me to please take her child and raise it for her. it took a lot of cowardess and a lot of bravery both to ask me that. i accepted the child as a gift from god, and intend to raise her as my own. any feelings for her mother have absolutely nothing to do with my desire to care for her. i wish her mother the best in life, and i hope that she one day has what it is that she seeks. i am not raising her child out of retaliation at all. i took this baby into my heart and life because i want her to have a life that she deserves and i know that i can provide that. I honestly see no cowardess in her asking someone else to take the child...it is the toughest decision to make...and she actually did the more thoughtful thing! I do hope that you can drop the anger i sense towards the childs mom...after all if she had decided to terminate you wouldnt have the little lady of the world that you do!

thekajiracat -> RE: someone please just listen to me (2/7/2007 10:46:02 AM)
the only reason i referred to her action as one of cowardess is because her motivation for asking me to take her child was that the child hinders her from her own life of the drugs and alcohol. it was noble that she realized she wasnt ready for the responsibility of bella, and asked for my help. i recognize that in her, it was her reasoning that proved cowardess, in my opinion.

Vendaval -> RE: someone please just listen to me (2/8/2007 11:07:05 AM)
Your actions are noble and honorable. You have a great and wonderful responsibility in your life now. Be proud of yourself and the decision you made. Peace, Vendaval

pahunkboy -> RE: someone please just listen to me (2/8/2007 11:31:00 AM)
gives you a BIG hug embraces you gives you a HUGE smile

completenz -> RE: someone please just listen to me (2/8/2007 2:38:28 PM)
hi glad you are working on the legal situation. Its your life and you must be true to yourself and follow your own heart. Dont doubt yourself, even when you are sleep deprived!!! lol ( that's one part of motherhood i definately dont miss) i wish you and your beautiful wee bub all the happiness in the world Big hugs c

venusdiva429 -> RE: someone please just listen to me (2/13/2007 4:40:53 PM)
You sound amazing. The baby couldn't be luckier to have such a great mama!

mixielicous -> RE: someone please just listen to me (2/13/2007 4:47:37 PM)
my dad isnt my bio and i am very thankful for him. you should be proud of what you did, you gave this baby a father when no one else wanted to be. give yourself a pat on the back, it was an admiral decision to make

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