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Forced? feminization? - 2/2/2007 4:55:38 PM   
wizardprincess


Posts: 10
Joined: 1/29/2007
From: Arkansas
Status: offline 		I was interested in this subject. I have a close male friend with whom I occasionally experiment with. We are both VERY new to the whole lifestyle. I have noticed that he sometimes likes to pretend to be a woman. Aka: wearing very feminie intimate apearl....slips, dresses, girly nightgowns. He is in no way gay in a male sense. It is almost like he is a lesbian trapped in a mans body. He is obsessed with the female body and everything about it. Although I am submissive, it does turn me on to think of having sex with him dressed as a woman. He knows that I am aware of his fetish type behavior and is trusting enough to tell me such things. So how should i go about doing something of the sort. I know to just talk to him, but I'm not sure how to approach the situation. Any sugestions would be greatly appreiciated.
thanks
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RE: Forced? feminization? - 2/2/2007 6:13:37 PM   
KarbonCopy


Posts: 779
Status: offline 		Be honest with him.

Be straight up about it. the worst he can do is say no :P

if yes then take the time to talk about what you both want.


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RE: Forced? feminization? - 2/2/2007 6:15:36 PM   
bandit25


Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline 		Karbon has given you good advice.  Simply talk to him about it.  If he's comfortable enough for you to know about his fetish, he should be ok with talking about having sex with you.

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RE: Forced? feminization? - 2/2/2007 6:45:08 PM   
wizardprincess


Posts: 10
Joined: 1/29/2007
From: Arkansas
Status: offline 		Thanks you guys. it just dosen't seem so easy from my perspective seeing as how i'm submissive also, so it's very hard for me to initaite a more dominant conversation. And this is very contradictory of my to say, but i'm not even sure i can be dominant enough to do it. Who knows though.....we never know until we try right?
Thanks again for the input.

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RE: Forced? feminization? - 2/2/2007 6:59:14 PM   
BRNaughtyAngel


Posts: 1821
Status: offline 		You might consider sharing your thoughts and feelings about this with him through an email.  I know it's an impersonal way to share something like this, but if it's email or not sharing it at all, I'd go with the email.  It will also give him time to digest what you've shared without having to respond immediately, giving him a chance to mull it over.

Good luck to you!

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RE: Forced? feminization? - 2/2/2007 7:04:19 PM   
Cedwen


Posts: 15
Joined: 1/29/2007
Status: offline 		Read some where there are four basic types of people ! Man/man. Woman/woman . Woman/man . Man/woman.So what you describe is not abnorman.We all are often trapped in a body we dont like ! Surely he is not a wimp ? It takes courage to admit you are not one of the first two ! Such are usualy hetro and not the first two. The first two for sure always make it obvious what they are  The last two try to hide it. Takes love and understanding with another for them to reveal themselves, Seldom are they gay or lesbian They reveal themselves. You would know by now if he is Bi. Use the situation to your advantage ? Maybe thats why you are on this site ? I use my husband this way. he loves it and loves me back as do I of himCedwen

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RE: Forced? feminization? - 2/2/2007 7:24:34 PM   
BeautifulRacket


Posts: 70
Joined: 9/28/2006
From: Seattle Area
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Cedwen

Read some where there are four basic types of people ! Man/man. Woman/woman . Woman/man . Man/woman.So what you describe is not abnorman.We all are often trapped in a body we dont like ! Surely he is not a wimp ? It takes courage to admit you are not one of the first two ! Such are usualy hetro and not the first two. The first two for sure always make it obvious what they are  The last two try to hide it. Takes love and understanding with another for them to reveal themselves, Seldom are they gay or lesbian They reveal themselves. You would know by now if he is Bi. Use the situation to your advantage ? Maybe thats why you are on this site ? I use my husband this way. he loves it and loves me back as do I of himCedwen

You make an awful lot of generalizations, which makes it appear that you have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. You may want to be careful about that in the future.

I'm with the "talk to him" crew, WP. I don't think communicating or having courage are dominant traits (in fact, some of the best communicators and most curageous I know are submissive), so take care in selling yourself short and/or hiding behind things because you're a submissive. Find the courage to assert your desires, and tell him you're very attracted to him, then ask if he'd ever consider getting involved with you (sexually, or whatever you have in mind). You might also let him know you don't need an answer on the spot, and your feelings and friendship won't be hurt if he's not willing or able to get involved. At least that'd be the gist of what I'd say in your position.

Best of luck to you, and I ope you'll let us know how it goes!

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RE: Forced? feminization? - 2/2/2007 7:52:13 PM   
wizardprincess


Posts: 10
Joined: 1/29/2007
From: Arkansas
Status: offline 		Thank you guys all very much. I really like BRNaughty Angel's idea of the e-mail. I am a wimp that way. I'll definently keep everyone posted. I think I may go on over and type up a message now. He'll be at work till around midnight. Perhaps it'll give me time to get over my nervousness.....cause once I hit the 'send' key, that's it baby! :)  Then we'll find out how he feels tonight. I just wander how it'll all play out seeing as how he's pretty much (or so it seems) just as submissive as I am. Does that usually work?
I really love this site and all the great feedback. Thanks agian.....hopefully i'll have good news tomarrow!

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RE: Forced? feminization? - 2/3/2007 2:13:16 PM   
Wulfgang


Posts: 14
Joined: 1/24/2007
Status: offline 		I find it a major turn on to be dressed up, thats where my switch sub side is.

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RE: Forced? feminization? - 2/3/2007 2:23:57 PM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		Im curious why you would think of it as a necessarily dominant conversation.  It doesnt sound terribly like he needs to be forced to dress. It would be your both enjoying a shared fetish, one that he pursues on his own from what you said. (unless I misunderstood)
There is a difference between needing to force fem someone, who is not naturally drawn to the femenine side they are expected to adopt, and someone who is obviously into it without much help.

Yes, talk to him  But dont view it as your needing to take a dominant role.  Think of it more as expressing an interest in something he has already admitted to you as attracting him.  Tell him how it made you feel, and see how he reacts.  There is an excellent chance that the idea of sex dressed as a woman is part of his fetish/fantasy too.  You might be helping him realize that, and not even knowing it.

Good luck

DV

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RE: Forced? feminization? - 2/3/2007 2:49:51 PM   
spiritd1


Posts: 53
Joined: 1/21/2006
Status: offline 		I am very much like you friend. I love to be feminine whenever I can and am in noway gay(nothing against gay it is just not me) and I would relish having a girlfriend to do things with. I would invite him over and do girl things like dressing up, makeup and talk about fem things. Then you could get around to sex and ask him if he would like to try it dressed up, let him know how you feel when with a guy and ask if he would like to try it being dressed up. I really think he would be very eager and willing as hormones get going when you are with someone of the sex you prefer. From experience I can tell you he would love to be able to dress up with you and have a GG help him learn all he has missed in the early years of not being a girl. Growing up as a male we miss alot and have alot to learn and change if we want to be as feminine as we can. We have to change our whole way of thinking and actions and we need to get alot more in touch with our feelings. Women are so much more complicated than men and have so much more to deal with in life that it takes a guy so long to catch up on all that. OK I could ramble on but give it a try I think he will jump at the chance. Good luck sweetie and let us know how it all works out. :):)  

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RE: Forced? feminization? - 2/3/2007 2:54:06 PM   
spiritd1


Posts: 53
Joined: 1/21/2006
Status: offline 		Forced Fem WOW what a great life that would be.

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RE: Forced? feminization? - 2/5/2007 11:33:26 AM   
KarbonCopy


Posts: 779
Status: offline 		So how did it go?

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RE: Forced? feminization? - 2/5/2007 2:58:58 PM   
mp072004


Posts: 381
Joined: 12/22/2005
Status: offline 		Yes, talk to your friend. If you already know that he crossdresses, and especially if you've seen him dressed, telling him that you want to have sex with him seems like a very small jump. It seems sweet to me that you two have this comfortable, experimental erotic friendship.

To my knowledge, most crossdressing men are heterosexual or het-leaning bisexual. Obviously, I don't have a lot of sex with gay men, but I don't get the impression that many gay men like to dress in women's lingerie for erotic appeal.

People with male genitals, male identities, and an erotic fascination with women's bodies are heterosexual men, not lesbians trapped in men's bodies. If your friend thinks women are sexy, has male genitals and thinks of himself as a man, and likes to wear silky lingerie, he's a crossdressing het man.

Submission and crossdressing do not go hand in hand. Some submissive men have a thing for crossdressing. Some men aren't interested in power inequality but like to dress. And I know one who identifies as a dominant and a top and wears stockings and dresses, so I imagine there are more out there.

That said, Wizardprincess, if you want to initiate sex, you've got to summon some shred of assertiveness--it's just not possible to initiate sex while being entirely passive, though you could flirt and hint heavily if you prefer a coy veneer. Good luck!

Monica




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RE: Forced? feminization? - 2/5/2007 8:00:29 PM   
wizardprincess


Posts: 10
Joined: 1/29/2007
From: Arkansas
Status: offline 		Well, words were spoken, decisions were made and let me tell you it was an interesting weekend. I shall not induldge in details but I WILL say this:
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED! Yea, in the words of  Bogart: "......I think this is the begining of a beautiful friendship"
Thank you all, I really gained alot of confidence from everyone edgeing my on. Yall are so awsome. I don't think this will be a serious thing between us which is not what I was looking for. And to be honest, I was a little scared he would expect more from me besides just a friend to play with (so to speak) but we both pretty much had been having the same feelings for a while.
wow....life...it's always an adventure!
Thanks again all.

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RE: Forced? feminization? - 2/6/2007 4:33:26 AM   
sheilaslavecd


Posts: 3
Joined: 12/28/2006
Status: offline 		Good to hear it all turned out in a way that works for you.

Relish your (rare?) luck and I wish you the best :-)

Also, as a side note, if things get serious, there is always the possibility of the two of you becoming the rare sub/sub relationship. But as far as relationships go, don't force anything make it as natural as possible :-)

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RE: Forced? feminization? - 2/6/2007 5:59:53 AM   
MsSonnetMarwood


Posts: 1898
Joined: 2/10/2005
From: Eastern Shore, Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: spiritd1

Forced Fem WOW what a great life that would be.


How is it forced when it's what you want?



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RE: Forced? feminization? - 2/10/2007 5:06:45 AM   
macdaddi


Posts: 3
Joined: 7/7/2006
Status: offline 		I ENJOY THE FEELING AND IDEA OF DRESSING UP.  IT IS VERY EXCITING TO FEEL SOFT PANTIES AND SILK STOCKINGS. IT IS ALSO THE HUMILATION OF BEING DRESSED THAT IS EXCITING.I BELIEVE IT GOES BACK TO MY CHILDHOOD OF SEEING WOMEN IN HEELS , STOCKINGS, GARTERS ETC THAT HAS ME WITH THIS FETISH.

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