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What does surrender mean or look like to you as a slave? - 2/8/2007 2:19:09 PM   
MasterRobsalayna


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alayna has a question for slaves.  What does total and complete surrender to your Master or Mistress mean to you?  What does it look like in your relationship?  Is there anything you keep unto yourself (emotionally, physically, practicality wise), something that does not belong to Master/Mistress?  That may be the antithesis of a slave, alayna knows, but just curious.  Another question is:  when was the moment you realized that you did (or did not) give "everything" unto Master/Mistress?  Was it an "aha" moment or a slow realization or instantaneous?  Any thoughts on this issue would be appreciated and yes, LA, alayna would love to see some links (Master llmits alayna's computer time so any shortcuts to this topic are welcome!).

Masters/Mistresses feel free to respond, too, if that is okay on this forum.

And yes, Master, slave knows....

Thank you, everyone.

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~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The only thing in life that i regret is living too many days regretting too many things. Life is for the living and i choose to live!
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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/8/2007 2:34:09 PM   
Wildfleurs


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quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterRobsalayna

alayna has a question for slaves.  What does total and complete surrender to your Master or Mistress mean to you?  What does it look like in your relationship?  Is there anything you keep unto yourself (emotionally, physically, practicality wise), something that does not belong to Master/Mistress?  That may be the antithesis of a slave, alayna knows, but just curious.  Another question is:  when was the moment you realized that you did (or did not) give "everything" unto Master/Mistress?  Was it an "aha" moment or a slow realization or instantaneous?  Any thoughts on this issue would be appreciated and yes, LA, alayna would love to see some links (Master llmits alayna's computer time so any shortcuts to this topic are welcome!).

Masters/Mistresses feel free to respond, too, if that is okay on this forum.

And yes, Master, slave knows....

Thank you, everyone.


Do you mean how it looks practically in day to day life?  Or in general (and probably romantic) sense what it looks like?

Also if you wouldn't mind clarifying what you mean by keep to yourself (like an example)?

C~


_____________________________

"Just because you've always done it that way doesn't mean it's not incredibly stupid." -despair.com

~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/8/2007 2:41:14 PM   
mixielicous


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quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterRobsalayna
Is there anything you keep unto yourself (emotionally, physically, practicality wise), something that does not belong to Master/Mistress?

Another question is: when was the moment you realized that you did (or did not) give "everything" unto Master/Mistress?



i would like to imagine that i have posessions of my own ... but the truth of the matter is, i may own something, but since Master owns me, my posession becomes His. It was kinda an 'a-ha' moment had by me a few nights ago over a glass of wine ... when Master let me know, this was the way it was. LOL. but i dont mind, i know He would have no actual desire to posess sentimental things of mine so it doesnt worry me much.

and i dont really mind giving Him my paychecks because i am not a good saver really, and this way i feel like i am being spoiled a lot [even if He is just spending my own money on me hehehe]


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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/8/2007 2:45:17 PM   
juliaoceania


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I am a submissive, I do know that my feeling is that I am slowly surrendering to my Daddy. It is a process. I had not mentioned this before, but recently I had an occurrence that has shown me how deeply I have  surrendered to him. I cannot go into specifics because it might cause some controversy which would be inappropriate and hijack the thread, but it was an extremely meaningful thing for me... and perhaps that is part of the reason I do not want to share it?

I think that true surrender takes time. In my relationship it is taking time at least. I know that I have not only given up control to him, but I have given up control over many things external to our dynamic. I am FREE because of this surrender. I feel as though he has taught me this on many levels, and some of it is my own self discovery. I have trust, not only in him, but in me. I cannot control anything but my response. This I have complete control over. I trust myself to respond correctly.

When there is conflict of even the smallest kind within our dynamic, I have noted that it is resistence on my part that causes it, and I correct this immediately. The better I get at surrendering, the less conflict there is not only between the two of us, but within me. That is why I feel more at peace lately than I have ever been in my life, I have surrendered, and I am free.

I am not perfect in my submission, and I still work daily to become more at peace and more of who I am on a daily basis. There is still resistence on my part at times, this is because old habits die hard. I spent an entire lifetime trying to control my reality instead of just allowing things and people to be the way that they are. I am now in the process of establishing new habits, and this is the process I spoke of earlier. The surrender has happened, and now it can cement itself into my daily life.

At least that is how it is playing out for me. I am looking forward to reading other people's perspectives. Great topic.

Edited to add, if I desire possessions it is only because I desire the feelings that come with them, sure stuff is fun, but it is just "stuff". I am of the opinion that your possessions own you, so I do not desire "stuff" for its own sake. I would rather be free. Nothing means more to me than the people I love, and I cannot take "stuff" with me.

< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 2/8/2007 2:50:21 PM >


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Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/8/2007 2:47:49 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


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90% of the time it looks like any other relationship.

I do not keep anything from my partner except birthday and hannukah surprises and that's just for a short time- and we are a vanilla based relationship.

It's honestly not something I had thought of until you asked, although I was delighted the other day when my partner used "we" in terms of his CDs.

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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/8/2007 3:16:38 PM   
sambamanslilgirl


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What does total and complete surrender to your Master or Mistress mean to you?
total and complete surrender to Daddy meant that i gave everything about me (the good, the bad, the ugly and the imperfect) to Him and once i did, i never felt so free in my life.  Daddy accepted that i'm a strong woman who needed His guidance to fully achieve my potential which He sees in me. it was terrifying at first because i thought i had to be perfect for Daddy before surrendering and submitting to Him. as Daddy told me, 'if you were perfect, I would be out of a job.'  Daddy knows i have some weak points in which i will improve on as i grow and learn yet there are other points He's strenghtening.

What does it look like in your relationship? 
don't understand.

Is there anything you keep unto yourself (emotionally, physically, practicality wise), something that does not belong to Master/Mistress?
decision-making for the concerns and welfare of my 2 UMs i keep that part of me. He only has a general interest in their daily life and they see Him as "Uncle".  Daddy does give medical advice and assistance when i have questions because my oldest is a traumatic brain injured and He has experience about treatments and medicines.

He doesn't have to micro-manage my life except for a few certain things (like going out on dates or non-work related events). He does take interest in the work i do (music reviewer for a radio station) and loves reading my reviews.

hope that answers your questions


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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/8/2007 3:26:01 PM   
subsidize


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total surrender to this girl means giving up all my material possessions and becoming a total doormat for Him.

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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/8/2007 4:02:55 PM   
Mercnbeth


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quote:

What does total and complete surrender to your Master or Mistress mean to you? 


that nothing is held back from Master.  tangible or not, everything belongs to Master and He has the right to it whenever He desires.

quote:

What does it look like in your relationship?


Master's name is on all the pink slips.  Master calls ALL the shots.  His pleasure is paramount.  this slave tells Master everything that crosses her mind and comes into her little corner of the world by way of the internet, phone line, delivery service or persons appearing in His absence.

quote:

Is there anything you keep unto yourself (emotionally, physically, practicality wise), something that does not belong to Master/Mistress? 


No.

quote:

 when was the moment you realized that you did (or did not) give "everything" unto Master/Mistress?  Was it an "aha" moment or a slow realization or instantaneous?


it was instantaneous--the moment this slave chose to be His slave.  if she could not have given "everything", she would have self-identified as "submissive" and sought a Dom who would abide by her requirements and limits and go along with her retaining authority or control over certain things she could call her "own".

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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/8/2007 6:34:04 PM   
sweetnurseBBW


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quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterRobsalayna

alayna has a question for slaves.  What does total and complete surrender to your Master or Mistress mean to you? 
He owns it all. Everything is his.

What does it look like in your relationship? 
Basically what he says goes.

Is there anything you keep unto yourself (emotionally, physically, practicality wise), something that does not belong to Master/Mistress? 
His pleasure and needs come before mine. I obey and serve him as he sees fit. What belongs to me belongs to him. That is just how it is. No other way to put it. Surprise presents and stuff like that I keep until I am ready to give to him.


That may be the antithesis of a slave, alayna knows, but just curious.  Another question is:  when was the moment you realized that you did (or did not) give "everything" unto Master/Mistress?  Was it an "aha" moment or a slow realization or instantaneous? 
It wasn't instantaneous. We both had to learn and trust first. The foundation was there. When I took His collar his limts became mine, everything I had he then owned.


Any thoughts on this issue would be appreciated and yes, LA, alayna would love to see some links (Master llmits alayna's computer time so any shortcuts to this topic are welcome!).

Masters/Mistresses feel free to respond, too, if that is okay on this forum.

And yes, Master, slave knows....

Thank you, everyone.


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Sir Pain's pain slut

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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/10/2007 5:34:47 PM   
goodpet


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It looks like me sleeping in the cold dark damp dirt/cement basement because Sir told me to. And doing it without asking or challenging Him about why He wanted me to do it. Just doing it. 

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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/10/2007 6:05:20 PM   
myobedience


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 What does total and complete surrender to your Master or Mistress mean to you? 
 
i will tell you what i would like it to mean to Him and me....
i give myself completely and He understand me completely because He has taken the time to know me and i have been given the ability to ask my questions...or to reinstated my peculiar goals...if He accepts me for me, then i am willing to give him all.... 
me

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A Man who always seeks to be the best He can be for you is the only Man truly worthy of being called Master.

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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/10/2007 7:10:05 PM   
Squeakers


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     For me, it was mental---surrendering of the mind.     I can tell him anything good or bad expect like LA said, birthday or holiday gifts and I even have a difficult time from telling.    

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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/12/2007 3:03:43 AM   
Areflectionofyou


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The surrender..meaning complete surrender happened over time for me with him. He took things slow with me ..ive been a slave since 19 and i think he was nervous about my experience level as compared to his. It all changed just recently where he has slowly been taking control of my life one thing at a time. This has been far different than anything ive experienced before.

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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/12/2007 9:12:15 PM   
classykindasassy


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Thy will and not mine, Lord...

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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/12/2007 11:46:30 PM   
captiveprincess


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Everyone who has posted has made excellent points.  However, there is one thing i would like to add that no one has thought to mention yet or perhaps it is a difference in viewpoints, but to me giving up total control and surrendering completely not only means doing what my Lady tells me to but it most importantly means putting Her thoughts and wishes above my own.

Lady K's collared slave,
~shelly

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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/14/2007 8:37:50 AM   
Devilslilsister


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Funny enough, i just asked this a question that is almost a follow up to this. 

i know what surrender looks like sort of.... but i dont really want to share.  Tell you if i get there = )


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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/14/2007 2:51:34 PM   
Arastella


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I dunno if you can really define it.  You can just feel it is all.

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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/15/2007 6:43:05 PM   
andreaC


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Complete surrender to me happened when i totally gave my life, trust, possession, mind, body and soul to my Master. 

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Complete and extremely happy :)
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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/15/2007 7:20:28 PM   
slavemaia


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Surrender has been and will mostly likely continue to be a process. It is something that happens within me rather than something within my control. It's occurred over the course of time, sometimes by forcing myself to do exactly what i don't agree with because it's what Master wants - othertimes it's this amazing realization of how much i adore Chairman and crave pleasing Him. In this regard it's more of a surrender to who i am on a very deep level. What it looks like in my relationship is He's in charge and i'm not - ha ha - that's it in a nutshell.
 
In terms of an aha moment - yes - when i realized that Master had taken me, not by force but through patience and love, my desire to please Him grew so strong that suddenly i realized the power struggle was over, i wasn't so afraid anymore - the fear had been replaced with love and gratitude. Are there things i still cling to? Undoubtedly yes - as i doubt all my fears and doubts have been wiped away entirely, but Master expects only steady progress, not perfection.

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She reaches up, not for the apple, but for what causes it to be there.
slave to love - - Chairman's maia


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RE: What does surrender mean or look like to you as a s... - 2/15/2007 7:58:20 PM   
BitaTruble


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quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterRobsalayna

alayna has a question for slaves.  What does total and complete surrender to your Master or Mistress mean to you? 


Letting go of expectations and actually submitting to his will as he requires I should rather than as I think I should.

quote:

What does it look like in your relationship? 


It's invisible.

quote:

 Is there anything you keep unto yourself (emotionally, physically, practicality wise), something that does not belong to Master/Mistress? 


Nope, nothing.

quote:

 That may be the antithesis of a slave, alayna knows, but just curious.  Another question is:  when was the moment you realized that you did (or did not) give "everything" unto Master/Mistress? 


The day I accepted I was his slave.

quote:

 Was it an "aha" moment or a slow realization or instantaneous? 


Pretty much instant. Once I got it, I got it. That's how I 'get' most things though. Blind as a bat with no sonar, bumping into cave walls, then BOOM.. the light bulbs come on and I have the knowledge forever more.

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


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