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What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 5:47:31 AM

hot1

Posts: 455
Joined: 5/4/2004
From: Ontario Canada
Status: offline

Ok.....I am pissed....my pet peeve is shallow people.

I just received an email from someone who comes across as being very very shallow. I responce only half rude...I mean I could of ripped a piece out of him...and simply said that because of a disability I cannot do heels and corsets...to which he comes back giving me hell becuase the fact that I have a mild disability it is not in my profile.....I was hurt and pissed.....but now am thinking should it be? At the same time whose business is it? Not that I hide it...but I refuse to let it interfer with living my life. What's the big deal that I can't do heels and corset....Hell I can't sweep and scrub floors either.....nor can I lift over 30 pounds...so that ALL is supposed to be in the profile.

Oh..I am at work so likely not able to really respond much until I get home tonight...but will try..

beth

< Message edited by hot1 -- 2/12/2007 5:54:39 AM >

_____________________________

come on guys...give the blond a break
Please Don't Confuse The Blond

Post #: 1

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 5:55:15 AM

pahunkboy

Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline

I never put my social security number in my profiles.

He was probaly wanking to the thought of the heals.

(in reply to hot1)

Post #: 2

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 5:56:21 AM

cjenny

Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline

I ran into that a lot. Then I just popped it all to the top of my profile.. and now I get mail asking precise details of each ailment lol. Dang I woke up this morning to a snarky post asking what I do for a living that 'lets' me lay in bed all day!! I think it is easier to have it in my profile, though several folks here told me I should not do it.
But we all know how carefully profiles are read....I say upfront that I am not seeking other than friendship.
Silly peeps, profiles are for perusing!

_____________________________

*Unless I cite a source it is MO.

~ ssssh. i think i've just found freedom. ~

(in reply to hot1)

Post #: 3

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 5:56:29 AM

gardenia100

Posts: 38
Joined: 3/25/2006
Status: offline

No I'm with you Beth on that one. A profile is just a snap shot of you. In no way can you posibly list everything about you, just something to give an idea. From there, thats where the communication starts. Shoot its just an email to get to know one another not a proposal. He was off base, but many are.....LOL. How many emails do you get and they never go anywhere? Just let the troll go and get on about your business. Don't let him bother you.

Barbara

(in reply to hot1)

Post #: 4

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 6:12:46 AM

Lillithsdream

Posts: 20
Joined: 9/15/2006
Status: offline

I post in my profile about my car accident. Had too, since I really did get hurt, I have neck injuries. lol...one smart ass Dom wrote me an email saying well...how hurt are you? Can you come serve me? We don't even need to go into that one but...just letting you know...I think honesty in what we have to offer from the get go is the right way to go. If we have physical limitations, what can you do except cope with them? I know there are understanding people on CM, just as there are assholes.
Lil

_____________________________

“The only thing I regret about my past is the length of it. If I had to live my life again I'd make all the same mistakes - only sooner.”
santiz Tallulah Bankhead quotes , 1903-1968)

(in reply to gardenia100)

Post #: 5

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 6:30:13 AM

pahunkboy

Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline

Hey- to the disabled. BAD word.

I am pernanently and totally disabled.

When asked- standard reply- "im retired"
if teh person is worht more- ill add, "had an accident doing constryctiuon, as my last job was building houses]

(in reply to Lillithsdream)

Post #: 6

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 6:34:28 AM

cjenny

Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: pahunkboy

Hey- to the disabled. BAD word.

I am pernanently and totally disabled.

When asked- standard reply- "im retired"
if teh person is worht more- ill add, "had an accident doing constryctiuon, as my last job was building houses]

Disabled was a horrid word, until I finally came to terms with it this year. Now it is just a word... like brunette. It is a word that describes part of me.
I put it up there because like other posters I am tired of 'Doms' trying to convince me that sure, I can be suddenly fit and able for the TwueDom that they are.

It isn't that big of a deal to me, I just want them aware so I don't have to run it all by over and over.

_____________________________

*Unless I cite a source it is MO.

~ ssssh. i think i've just found freedom. ~

(in reply to pahunkboy)

Post #: 7

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 7:20:23 AM

hot1

Posts: 455
Joined: 5/4/2004
From: Ontario Canada
Status: offline

Well, I refuse to admit or live like I am disabled...but I am not so blond that I won't take the tax credit and gimp parking sticker thank you very much.

I am sorry..but a big part of who I am is how I handle my medical. For not giving up and just go and sit in the chairs like the doctors say i might as well do. and dammit anyone that basically tells me I am not worth the time of day because I can't wear heels....i just want to string up by the nuts

_____________________________

come on guys...give the blond a break
Please Don't Confuse The Blond

(in reply to cjenny)

Post #: 8

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 7:23:12 AM

cjenny

Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline

Interesting hot1.. it is very possible that I have given up.
Of course a tax credit & medical insurance would be a help. Ooooh. New profile, submissive woman ISO wealthy insured Dominant who doesn't mind taking care of all household chores! Oh, and doesn't mind no sex, no play as well LOL.

_____________________________

*Unless I cite a source it is MO.

~ ssssh. i think i've just found freedom. ~

(in reply to hot1)

Post #: 9

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 7:29:57 AM

hot1

Posts: 455
Joined: 5/4/2004
From: Ontario Canada
Status: offline

I know what it is like cjenny.....I am just too damm stubborn to ...or that is what one of my best friends tells me when he keeps offering to call the vet to put me down ...lol

Also been told no since in trying to kill myself...the bullet would jsut bounce off the hard head...lol

but on a serious note...when I get down...and feel like giving up...I have friends that help.....I have a network of "diasable" friends.....they can give me a good boot in the ass and I have to take it...they are in worse shape than me.

beth

_____________________________

come on guys...give the blond a break
Please Don't Confuse The Blond

(in reply to cjenny)

Post #: 10

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 7:34:25 AM

findmedaddy

Posts: 254
Joined: 5/18/2006
From: Maine
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: cjenny

I ran into that a lot. Then I just popped it all to the top of my profile.. and now I get mail asking precise details of each ailment lol. Dang I woke up this morning to a snarky post asking what I do for a living that 'lets' me lay in bed all day!! I think it is easier to have it in my profile, though several folks here told me I should not do it.
But we all know how carefully profiles are read....I say upfront that I am not seeking other than friendship.
Silly peeps, profiles are for perusing!

I believe that note was implying that there is one profession a woman pursues in bed. Still a snarky post, but not necessarily for the reason you thought.

To hot1 -- my profile has been criticized for saying too much...and then for not being clear enough about what I want...etc, etc. Some people just look for ways to make others feel bad. it's stupid and a waste of time. I sympathize with you and hope you can shrug it off soon.

(in reply to cjenny)

Post #: 11

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 7:37:02 AM

cjenny

Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline

Heh well I knew I senses snarkiness somewhere in there. It just didn't occur to me to take it the way you suggested! Hahahaha proof positive that my sex drive is in park.
*hugs fmd*

_____________________________

*Unless I cite a source it is MO.

~ ssssh. i think i've just found freedom. ~

(in reply to findmedaddy)

Post #: 12

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 7:39:14 AM

findmedaddy

Posts: 254
Joined: 5/18/2006
From: Maine
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: pahunkboy

Hey- to the disabled. BAD word.

I am pernanently and totally disabled.

When asked- standard reply- "im retired"
if teh person is worht more- ill add, "had an accident doing constryctiuon, as my last job was building houses]

My father was disabled, and that was the word he preferred. The choices then were "crippled" and "handicapped," if I remember correctly. He liked disabled because it was descriptive and -- at that time -- not pejorative. Maybe it had become a bad word. But I think I know what he would make or other choices, such as "differently abled" and the like.

(in reply to pahunkboy)

Post #: 13

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 7:40:13 AM

BlkTallFullfig

Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline

I think disabled to the extent that it is problematic to carry on activities of daily living should be alluded to in general, than spoken about if the person communicating asks.
I don't think it's possible to mention everything in a profile. I try and mention the important things about me which may or may not be deal breakers for some from my description of me to what I seek. M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to hot1)

Post #: 14

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 7:44:27 AM

SirKenin

Posts: 2994
Joined: 10/31/2004
From: Barrie, ON Canada
Status: offline

Anything that aids or impedes in your abilities to serve should be listed. You should not be hiding the fact that you have a disability. Really, if you get snarky comments because you hid it and then it comes out after someone bites, it is your own fault.

I would disclose it personally. I equate it to people lying about their age or weight (something that is very common on sites like these) so they can attract more "bites".

_____________________________

Hi. I don't care. Thanks.

Wicca: Pretending to be an ancient religion since 1956

Catholic Church: Serving up guilt since 107 AD.

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

Post #: 15

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 7:46:17 AM

BBBTBW

Posts: 836
Joined: 5/21/2004
Status: offline

I have a 75% disability in my right ankle and a 25% disability in my left wrist. All due to a car accident 7 years ago. I spent 2.5 years in a wheel chair learning to walk again while nursing a wound (the bones came thru) that couldn't be closed with stitches and the grafts didn't take. I decided to take the bull by the horns, perscribe my own physical therapy, work at a restaurant for 2 additional years which made me have to be on my feet and build my stamina up as well as my strength. I live with horrendous pain every day, but I bite the bullet on that...only OTC pain killers if absolutely necessary. And I can't wear heels either. Hell I can barely find decent shoes to wear since the injury made my foot larger, I went from a size 11.5 to a size 13 in women's shoes. Heck, thank GOD for foot slaves that enjoy large feet

. But during that time, I did have a slave leave because he couldn't face the fact that I might spend the rest of my life using a cane or in a wheelchair. I say GOOD RIDDANCE!!!!

_____________________________

"You keep using that word, I do not think it means what you think it means" -- Inigo Montoya, The Princess Bride

(in reply to hot1)

Post #: 16

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 7:47:46 AM

loverly

Posts: 236
Joined: 1/23/2004
Status: offline

on the original subject of .. " what should nad shouldn't be put in our priofiles"? .. whatever it is WE chose to share... and .. IF there is someone we come to care about and think of as a chat friend and maybe more...then perhaps we share all... until then.. not me... i am Honest in my profile.. that will show to the right people!

hope you All have a great day!

(in reply to cjenny)

Post #: 17

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 7:51:37 AM

cjenny

Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirKenin

Anything that aids or impedes in your abilities to serve should be listed. You should not be hiding the fact that you have a disability. Really, if you get snarky comments because you hid it and then it comes out after someone bites, it is your own fault.

I would disclose it personally. I equate it to people lying about their age or weight (something that is very common on sites like these) so they can attract more "bites".

Pardon me, the snarkiness was due to a post I made about being in bed all day. Not due to me LYING nor WITHHOLDING information. All you need to do is glance at my profile, I do not hold it back.
For this very reason.
The sheer tedium of explaining over and over again why I cannot do things except type for the most part.
Becoming disabled SirKenin cost me my marriage. I am not about to make the mistake of forcing my fucked up body on anyone ever ever again. No surprises come with this package.

_____________________________

*Unless I cite a source it is MO.

~ ssssh. i think i've just found freedom. ~

(in reply to SirKenin)

Post #: 18

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 7:57:37 AM

SirKenin

Posts: 2994
Joined: 10/31/2004
From: Barrie, ON Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: cjenny

*snip*

*yawn*

That is nice. No. Really.

My post was not directed at you. It was in the response to the OP, so no need to get your panties in a bunch.

_____________________________

Hi. I don't care. Thanks.

Wicca: Pretending to be an ancient religion since 1956

Catholic Church: Serving up guilt since 107 AD.

(in reply to cjenny)

Post #: 19

RE: What should and should not be in your profile? - 2/12/2007 7:57:42 AM

newsubseeking61

Posts: 33
Joined: 10/8/2006
Status: offline

Many people reading profiles on here feel that they are entitled to know everything about another.

They do not.

We need only reveal what we wish to reveal to any given individual. I prefer to disclose a lot about how I look as I hate the surprise factor. I want them to know going in that I am a big girl. But some things I don't disclose until I know them well enough that I feel it is important for them to know that. How many people do you actually talk/chat to are real candidates? VERY FEW, therefore, I think disclosure should really be on a need to know basis.

Also, for some people, remember what Jack Nicholson said: "You can't handle the truth!" (And many can't....so why do you want to know them?)

(in reply to hot1)

Post #: 20

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