RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was admin

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was admin (Full Version)

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onestandingstill -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was admin (2/14/2007 12:48:23 PM)
My First Sir and I did a lot of heavy breast play. Once he squeezed my boobs so hard one of my milk glands ruptured. Being we'd played with him squeezing them harder then that before we had no idea it would rupture. What we did is I went to my GYN who knows I'm into S&M and had he check it. I recommend all subs finding a medical professional that's aware they play hard before they have an issue. If they know before the marks or injuries occur then there's a better chance the Dr. will think it's consensual. I again say the Top/Dom/or Master should be trained in any edgy or extreme play well before he'd do something to a sub. Even if there's consent I think the Dom should be the deciding vote. I mean what if a sub consents to be killed for real in a scene, does that mean the Dom should honor that request? I think not as the Dom would still have to choose to be a murderer. I think many a sub does not know their own limits or the safety factors of a Doms job as far as edge play. No matter what a sub requests, if the Dom does these things he still chose to do it and should be responsible for it. If he causes permanent injury the notion it will be permanent will have to be agreed on by both people. In addition to that if you know what you're doing will damage someone to the point they need to go to an ER I think both people in that scene need help. If a rope, knife or whip slips, you have to accept accidents are going to happen. I guess if it's abusive depends on the intentions. On a separate note I don't see why asking questions is wrong. I think promoting discussion about subjects you are interested in has nothing to do with someone's knowledge necessarily. It may be the person just wants to see how other people's opinion mirror or don't mirror their own. I agree Ross writes a lot, but don't get the hostility of some people here. If it bothers you he asks questions too much no one said you had to read or participate in his threads. Coming here and participating only to to whine is very childish and unbecoming IMO. suzanne

MagiksSlave -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was a (2/14/2007 1:01:48 PM)
I honestly... Dont know Im very torn here over how to answer this... I really dont know Magik's slave

Devilslilsister -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was a (2/14/2007 3:57:41 PM)
Master is always trying to drag me to the hospital. The times he's managed to take me, he's even refused to leave me there. Gah - it'll take HOURS in an ER - might as well go and come back. He hollared at me last halloween when i was feeling really fricken wierd. Found out my blood sugar dropped. Gah, i have to becareful what i mention otherwise its "lets go to the doctor" But that might stem from the fact that 2 halloweens ago i had pnuemonia, pharynjitis (sp?) and tonsilities and i was laying in bed telling him to stop being so melodramatic and i didnt need to go to the hospital. i could barely walk, but i wasnt that sick. I did manage to convince him the night before i went to a doc that i wasnt that burning up and i escaped an ER visit. Course i had to promise to go the next day to a doc. i have medical insurance - lol - so really its all good. We have had "oops" but nothing ever requiring medical care. Although i am sure if something like that did happen - it would be the same ol same ol. Me trying to convince Master i'm okay and him dragging me to the hospital.

julietsierra -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was admin (2/14/2007 5:24:39 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69 Should a dominant intentionally physically hurt, not emotionally hurt? lol..I'd completely missed the emotional hurt part of this question. If he didn't delve into emotional sadism along the way, we'd have had a very short termed relationship. So damn straight a dominant should delve into emotional pain somewhere along the way if that's what he enjoys. He'd just better know what the hell he's doing and how to do it. Oh yea...and that sound of glee in his voice when he hears my pain and naturally reacts to it has the power to instantly change my pain to pleasure as I realize I've been feeding his sadism quite nicely and upon reflection, he'd been feeding my masochism. Cause it all just gives me another wonderous opportunity to choose him all over again... which makes my heart just about burst with loving him even more than I did. And I don't care one iota if anyone else thinks that's strange. juliet

touchthesky -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was a (2/14/2007 5:43:50 PM)
i think everyone knows the difference between being a Dom and a psycho..or fantasy and reality.i m excuciatingly familiar with the DSMIV, and under the addictions area there is nothing about BDSM being related to addiction,i think u have that out of context. any behavior can become obsessive compulsive including posting on internet forums

cjenny -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was admin (2/14/2007 5:52:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69 Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was adminsistered in a session even though it was within the submissive's consent and limits? I read that as a dom would be in the wrong if they did not send a submissive to a hospital. Or that the dom was going beyond the pre-arrangement therefore against the 'rules'. Trick question? Wouldn't this be an abuse of trust and responsibility? Again I read, is the trust that is being abused the trust given in the original arrangement. Should a dominant intentionally physically hurt, not emotionally hurt? Should the dom know the limits of the submissive? The submissive may be a masochist or enjoy emotional turmoil. Is harm a perception or a reality and how is it defined? Perception.. the way I am reading your questions is my perception only, and they could be totally off-based. Can giving a submissive discipline on a regular basis be percieved as harm as a co enabling of an adictive personality? Again I go back to the dominant knowing the submissive, knowing what she needs. Ross ©º°¨¨°º©

gandalf0297 -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was a (2/15/2007 12:39:37 PM)
Ok I am going to wade in here. And this happened to us so I feel I have more than enough experiance in it to last a LIFETIME..And belive me once is WAY to much. During the course of play I had an opps. And that's putting it mildly. I fucked up big time.And as I am trying to keep this short ,Im leaving out a bunch.(I pretty much lost it.control wise.) Suffice to say the the sub ended up taking herself to the hospital. Inatially the injury seemed to just be a sore back. Then at work she blew out a disc.This was a direct reslut from our play aession.She ended up taking over2.5 week's off of work.Not to mention thereduced paychecks ,the pain and suffering and all that happy shit. When you are playing with a sub YOU are responsable. YOU had damn well better take her to the hospital if she needs it. And YOU had better be ready to step up to the plate and accept responsibility. In both her care and monitary needs. for

SirDiscipliner69 -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was admin (2/16/2007 5:10:36 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: onestandingstill I think not as the Dom would still have to choose to be a murderer. I think many a sub does not know their own limits or the safety factors of a Doms job as far as edge play. No matter what a sub requests, if the Dom does these things he still chose to do it and should be responsible for it. Yes the responsibility is the safety of the dom for the sub. They are not under endorphines as much as the sub. I always advocate responsible behaviour that is within consenting limits. Ross ©º°¨¨°º©

SirDiscipliner69 -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was admin (2/16/2007 5:12:38 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: onestandingstill My First Sir and I did a lot of heavy breast play. Once he squeezed my boobs so hard one of my milk glands ruptured. Being we'd played with him squeezing them harder then that before we had no idea it would rupture. Having hung a submissive by her breast a few years ago was delightful to watch but she later was sore for days....the additional support may have been a lighter fare she would have suffered....but she did enjoy.. Ross ©º°¨¨°º©

SirDiscipliner69 -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was admin (2/16/2007 5:15:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: onestandingstillOn a separate note I don't see why asking questions is wrong. I think promoting discussion about subjects you are interested in has nothing to do with someone's knowledge necessarily. It may be the person just wants to see how other people's opinion mirror or don't mirror their own. I agree Ross writes a lot, but don't get the hostility of some people here. If it bothers you he asks questions too much no one said you had to read or participate in his threads. Coming here and participating only to to whine is very childish and unbecoming IMO. suzanne Thanks. The intent is evoke thought process and see just how established some may be in their thought process. Some are most afraid of what they do not understand or simply are unhappy people. Thanks for the comments as many have said the same to Me but in private messages and emails as they do not want the wrath of the scorned. Ross ©º°¨¨°º©

SirDiscipliner69 -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was a (2/16/2007 5:17:47 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave I honestly... Dont know Im very torn here over how to answer this... I really dont know Magik's slave Thank you. you are thinking about something you might not of been aware of. Ross ©º°¨¨°º©

SirDiscipliner69 -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was a (2/16/2007 5:19:33 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Devilslilsister Master is always trying to drag me to the hospital. The times he's managed to take me, he's even refused to leave me there. Gah - it'll take HOURS in an ER - might as well go and come back. your Master seems like he is a keeper. Ross ©º°¨¨°º©

SirDiscipliner69 -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was a (2/16/2007 5:22:27 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: gandalf0297When you are playing with a sub YOU are responsable. YOU had damn well better take her to the hospital if she needs it. And YOU had better be ready to step up to the plate and accept responsibility. In both her care and monitary needs. Agreed. Sorry for your mishap. Back injuries do not necessarily happen at the moment but from previous activity...possibly that which is repeated on a regular basis. Ross ©º°¨¨°º©

azzmaster -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was a (2/16/2007 5:25:27 PM)
accidents can happen, nah mean? but ya know if yall don't knowwhat u doin or how far 2 push , dis da wrong game fer ya.

SirDiscipliner69 -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was admin (2/16/2007 5:27:17 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: cjenny quote: ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69 Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was adminsistered in a session even though it was within the submissive's consent and limits? I read that as a dom would be in the wrong if they did not send a submissive to a hospital. Or that the dom was going beyond the pre-arrangement therefore against the 'rules'. Trick question? *No trick question...just if the dom were trying to pus the agreed envelope of consented limits and something did not work out or was to be more intense than awareness of both.* *I know what I would be and do but what is the general thoughts of those that read? Have they made arangements for such?* Wouldn't this be an abuse of trust and responsibility? Again I read, is the trust that is being abused the trust given in the original arrangement. *No...but the responsible person is suppose to be in charge and know better so at what point is back off just that and forget the goal of intent of pushing the envelope.* *I know from previous experience that something previously done may not work on a certain time, location, mindset.* Should a dominant intentionally physically hurt, not emotionally hurt? Should the dom know the limits of the submissive? The submissive may be a masochist or enjoy emotional turmoil. I have had the pleasure of sessioning with many women with much higher thresholds than the typical submissive...many lapped up the pain like it was going out of style...it is all in the presentation and build up. Ross ©º°¨¨°º©

SirDiscipliner69 -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was a (2/16/2007 5:30:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: touchthesky i think everyone knows the difference between being a Dom and a psycho..or fantasy and reality.i m excuciatingly familiar with the DSMIV, and under the addictions area there is nothing about BDSM being related to addiction,i think u have that out of context. any behavior can become obsessive compulsive including posting on internet forums Some do not but unknowigly find out sadly. I am not familiar with DSMIV...what is that short for? I think that the sensational rush can be equaled to morphine by some and can be classified as addictive. If not why would one need to push the limits if the same feeling were the same? Why wouldn't they just be content with being spanked as they may have in the first session? Ross ©º°¨¨°º©

SirDiscipliner69 -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was admin (2/16/2007 5:34:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: julietsierra quote: ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69 Should a dominant intentionally physically hurt, not emotionally hurt? lol..I'd completely missed the emotional hurt part of this question. If he didn't delve into emotional sadism along the way, we'd have had a very short termed relationship. So damn straight a dominant should delve into emotional pain somewhere along the way if that's what he enjoys. He'd just better know what the hell he's doing and how to do it. Mind fuckery is something that should be done with skill and with the intent that both parties are aware of what is to happen. I would hesitate admittedly with the emotional sadism...not with the physical as it were consent before hand. Emotional and mental may unleash long forgotten problems that I may not be able to control. Ross ©º°¨¨°º©

SirDiscipliner69 -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was admin (2/16/2007 5:36:21 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: julietsierra Oh yea...and that sound of glee in his voice when he hears my pain and naturally reacts to it has the power to instantly change my pain to pleasure as I realize I've been feeding his sadism quite nicely and upon reflection, he'd been feeding my masochism. Yes this has been experienced in the physical realm but not the mental / emotional realm that I can recall. I am glad you both found each other and are able to feed off each other over and over. Ross ©º°¨¨°º©

SirDiscipliner69 -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was admin (2/16/2007 5:37:39 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: onestandingstill Your question is a little confusing as to why the sub had to go to the Hospital. Did the Dom do it on purpose, did he screw up and do something by accident, did he lose control and go off in a fit of rage??? Did someone else do it? Did the sub have a medical problem unrelated to the Scene? Exactly what you're asking I'm not sure. No the question in theroy would be that of pushing the envelope and such responsibility for the thin line between dager and pleasure in achiving a desired goal of both. Ross ©º°¨¨°º©

SirDiscipliner69 -> RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was a (2/16/2007 5:40:54 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: NightWindWhisper Can giving a submissive discipline on a regular basis be perceived as harm as a co-enabling of an addictive personality? Very interesting question. Short answer: yes. Long answer: Being spanked regularly (in a non-damaging manner) in a way that fulfills the need to turn to, let's say, alcohol then why not? However anyone can perceive anything, and addicts are often linked with 12 step groups and within that there is the perception of switching one addiction for another is not good. To enable one to do that then also would be perceived as "not good." It's such an open ended general question it's really impossible to answer. As a side note, I believe that much of what occurs in a d/s // bdsm relationship is addicting. Heck I attempt to be my submissives addiction via orgasm and endorphin release, I haven't had any complaints on that one. Consider that working out at the gym, or running can be addictive, so can stamp collecting and sex. It's a matter of "does it interfere with life," or "is it harming the person in some way?" Running is exactly along the lines of BDSM...One pushes throught the pain..sets goals...pushes the envelope. After time it becomes easier. Then a new goal is set and the process is repeated. Endorphines are released to ease the pain. Many talk of a runner's high. Ross ©º°¨¨°º©

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