RE: Difference between slave and X's slave?

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RE: Difference between slave and X's slave? - 2/16/2007 8:12:09 PM

BabyNyla

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Joined: 9/15/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Archer

Not all slaves have a submissive nature, some have to work very hard at that aspect of being owned. But for some reason they find the work worthwhile.

This is so true, especially for me. I am very outspoken, and always have been. A lot of people say it is because I was Domme for so long ... but it's not that, it's just my personality. I have to work very hard to tone things down and to often think before I speak (I had this problem even as a young child ... it always got me in trouble).

My husband/Dom is the first person I have ever felt submissive towards ... and I crave very deeply to be his slave ... but it is a very hard thing for me to do ... and a constant life lesson. However, when he is pleased and happy ... all the pain and struggles are so worthwhile. And he allows me to remain *sassy* to a degree and he loves my opinions and fiestiness ... and I don't think those traits make me any less of a slave than a very weel behaved slave or a doormat.

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RE: Difference between slave and X's slave? - 2/16/2007 8:20:22 PM

maye

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Hello...i am new here ...new to the D/s lifestyle in fact, even though i have been married for 15 years. At the risk of "stepping on toes" since i'm the new kid on the block, i did want to comment on your post. One thing that i have found that bothers me, is when someone pulls out their "How to be a True Submissive" or "How to be a True Dominant" handbook and feels that they need to tell someone how they are doing it ALL wrong. Once you make the decision to be true to yourself and your partner it is your own self-exploration and experimentation that constitutes true submissiveness & Domination. Whatever works within the realm of your own personal realtionships is what truly matters.

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RE: Difference between slave and X's slave? - 2/16/2007 8:20:55 PM

AquaticSub

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Joined: 12/27/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

I guess, to my eyes, it seems much like a woman saying that women should stay home, have babies, be submissive to all men, wome are inferior, etc but saying that in a public forum. I mean, why isn't she at home making cookies and the next baby rather than causing a public scene with her inferior femaleness?

(not that I believe any of that, just that is read very weird to me so say one thing then do the opposite)

I understand that. I guess their answer would be that they are trying to educate us to our proper roles.

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RE: Difference between slave and X's slave? - 2/16/2007 8:27:51 PM

Wildfleurs

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Joined: 9/24/2004
From: Connecticut
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quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo:
Does anyone else see a big difference between someone who identifies as "a slave" or having "a slave soul" or anything else like that and someone identifying as "someone's slave"?

I see being a slave as a station - generally if I encounter someone who says they have a slave soul (or slave heart) ... or they are single and refer to themselves as a slave ... or better yet refer to themselves as slave ____ I usually think to myself "bullshit." So to me its hard to see a difference since I view it as only being a station (in relation to someone else) reflective of a dynamic.

quote:

As I see more and more threads where people who declare themselves to be "a slave", especially when the words they use suggest they see their own definition as superior or better than others, writing out very judgemental or black & white declarations I find myself wondering just why they are talking.

If they are "a slave" I find it rather odd that they tell anyone else what to think and declare their ideas so vehemently, even going so far as to say other's definitions and views are not "real" or "unnatural". Wouldn't "a slave" be silent on these issues or at least be careful to limit what they say only to themselves so they don't risk the wrath of free people? Shouldn't someone who identifies as "a slave" be more humble around free people -- I'm assuming that category is correct for some of us reading this forum after all.

No - I don't understand why in the world slaves would be a delicate flower that just shuffles around quietly like wallpaper.

C~

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RE: Difference between slave and X's slave? - 2/16/2007 9:23:43 PM

MsLadySue

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I agree with you Maye. When I first began my journey as a dominant woman, I was continually told "this is how you should do this or that" about the so called dominant rule book. I decided long ago that the only rules I would follow are the ones that work best for me and my partner.

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RE: Difference between slave and X's slave? - 2/17/2007 6:31:54 AM

thetammyjo

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MsLadySue

I agree with you Maye. When I first began my journey as a dominant woman, I was continually told "this is how you should do this or that" about the so called dominant rule book. I decided long ago that the only rules I would follow are the ones that work best for me and my partner.

I agree with both of you, thus my question.

When someone takes out their rule book, declares it to be the universal rule book, then behaves contrary to that, I get very very confused.

I guess my confusion over these situations resulted in an unclear initial post from me at the start of this thread. For that I apologize to those whom I confused.

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