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RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 7:14:20 AM

gooddogbenji

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline

I just read most of this thread, and want to thank the contributors for wasting their time on such a charitable issue.

However, much like giving a crack addict money, discussions with defiant rarely change the situation, and any emotional investment in the aptly named "Abyss of Ignorance" quickly leads to depression.

You have provided standard definitions to contrast hers, they have been ignored. You have pointed out many flaws in her view, they have been ignored. You have asked her to point out the merits of her view for the general public, it has been ignored.

Yet somehow, we all still care.

Maybe it just proves that bisexuality distracts us from rational thought.

Yours,

benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to viperess)

Post #: 161

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 7:22:46 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: viperess

LaTigresse i just pulled a pan on chocolate chip cookies from the oven...would that help?

Woooohooooooooooooo YES!

Thank you very much. I am not sure what evil facet of character that will bring out of me but yeahhhhhhhhh chocolate!!!

Must be the chocoholic me.....

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to viperess)

Post #: 162

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 7:30:04 AM

BRNaughtyAngel

Posts: 1821
Status: offline

Defiant, for one who has such strong opinions about sexual orientation and sexual history, you don't seem to have much of anything on your profile about that. In fact, you don't have a single remark about it.

Obviously you continue to have problems finding what you are seeking, so perhaps it's time to update the profile with a more clear picture of who you are and who/what you seek. That way, you can weed out those pesky bisexual straight males who have either played with another guys winky or secretly want to.

Make sure you include your relationship and sexual history, just in case they have a thing against straight switches whose ex husband was a closet bisexual possibly undeclared homosexual who liked hugging and blowjobs and whose baby daddy was a homophobic undeclared dom. Afterall, you do want to be honest and upfront about such things when you expect the same from them.

Good luck in your continued search.

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)

Post #: 163

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 7:40:20 AM

JackM1

Posts: 137
Joined: 2/3/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

I always thought straight men experimented on themselves with masturbation, not other men. My son's father was a natural dom, even though he didn't ever say he was into the lifestyle, he was always referring to himself as MasterSir then his name. He wouldn't even engage in anal sex with a woman because the whole idea of anything anal made him think about homosexuality. He was enraged over the fact that this man had married me saying he was straight. I am not the only one who feels this way. If a man can honestly swear he's straight when he's been with men, that would mean my husband did nothing wrong.

sweety ,thats called Homophibia.

for the record, im bisexual. the reason i know im bisexual is because i have a lingering attraction(sexualy, mentally) towards women, but also towards men in equal amounts. the difference between me and someone who is straight but obeying their Dom, is that if *I* were told to perform with another woman for my Dom i would most likely have an attraction and really enjoy myself. someone else who doesnt have any attraction to someone of the same sex would most likely do it out of submission, like so many other people have said, but i doubt they would get any kind of gratification out of it like i would.

lets try to break it down to something more simple, and stereotypicaly generall: we'll go with the female model

me= bi= hotts for pussy and dick= young, will, and egar! "what? eat out this wonderful pussy in front of me? dont mind if i do!!"

someone else= straight= hotts for dick but will bend for Doms pleasure= obeying, not very egar, but trying to enjoy themselves because theres no way to get out of it. "might as well, because a tongue is a tongue and an orgasm is an orgasm, and i'll get beaten if i dont..."

of course, everyone is different, and different people have different reasons for the things they do, but for the hell of it lets just reiterate what some other very smart people have said and say that "to each their own" and submission is greater then sexual desire. TADA!(though i have a sinking feeling that this is all for nothing...)

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)

Post #: 164

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 8:03:53 AM

BBBTBW

Posts: 836
Joined: 5/21/2004
Status: offline

Can you accept that you definition of Bi-Sexual does not fall in line with everyone's definition. Your definition is very narrow when it comes to the official dictionary definition as well as the definition when it is related to the lifestyle that we have all chosen to live. You are allowed your definition, no one is negating that. However you have to understand that just because you think that way doesn't mean everyone thinks the same way. If getting involved with a man that has had a sexual encounter with another man is such an issue for you, you really should make mention of it in your profile. You should also make that the first question you ask.

You used your disgust of liver as an analogy. Let me also use your disgust of liver. You tried it, you didn't like it, correct? However, by your standards, regardless of whether you liked it or not, you are a liver lover just by trying it.

Does it disgust you that a man's member has been inside another man's rectum or just a rectum in general, because honestly a rectum is a rectum regardless of the gender it is attached to? It serves the same functions male or female. If you are going to use certain arguments and analogies, make sure there aren't any holes in them.

When you reference vanilla lifestylers and GOD forbid talk shows, you have to know that they don't represent those that believe in wiitwd. If you are going to reference anything, make sure it is something that has relative overall opinion based upon the society that you are involved with. Comparing apples to oranges doesn't really get your point across. It just makes you look like a bitter, closed minded person.

_____________________________

"You keep using that word, I do not think it means what you think it means" -- Inigo Montoya, The Princess Bride

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)

Post #: 165

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 8:04:49 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

So does Defiant still believe that "not bisexual = hard limit on bisexual activity"?

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to JackM1)

Post #: 166

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 8:06:55 AM

gooddogbenji

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

So does Defiant still believe that "not bisexual = hard limit on bisexual activity"?

Nope. She still knows it.

Yours,

benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 167

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 8:14:52 AM

viperess

Posts: 290
Joined: 11/6/2006
Status: offline

LaTigresse
Just be careful cause they are like triple chocolate..gotta love Mrs. Fields..oh no loving a female...gonna have a real chocolate high today..yeppie

_____________________________

viperess slave of BlackTarnHeart
heart and chain sister to velvetvixen68

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Post #: 168

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 8:15:31 AM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

Some people want to be "forced" to do something they already want to do but need to be given permission to do it. In other words, they have yet to come to grips with who they are, but if they're doing it to make someone else, rather than themselves, happy, it becomes ok in their mind.

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
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Ms Relationship Books
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BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)

Post #: 169

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 8:38:54 AM

defiantbadgirl

Posts: 2988
Joined: 11/14/2005
Status: offline

That's just it. Many male subs haven't come to grips with who they are. Even if they excuse it as ok because they are doing it to please someone else, they are still willing to do it. If a master or mistress told a sub to jump off of a skyscraper and they did it to please their master or mistress, does that mean they weren't suicidal?

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 170

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 8:40:54 AM

agirl

Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BBBTBW

You used your disgust of liver as an analogy. Let me also use your disgust of liver. You tried it, you didn't like it, correct? However, by your standards, regardless of whether you liked it or not, you are a liver lover just by trying it.

.

*Liver lover* is a gorgeous word combination, by the way.

agirl

(in reply to BBBTBW)

Post #: 171

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 8:53:23 AM

agirl

Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

That's just it. Many male subs haven't come to grips with who they are. Even if they excuse it as ok because they are doing it to please someone else, they are still willing to do it. If a master or mistress told a sub to jump off of a skyscraper and they did it to please their master or mistress, does that mean they weren't suicidal?

Yep.

You've been given any number of analogies about doing things because you've been told to, not because you WANT to or would choose to.

And what of the ones that do it simply because they've been told to. You haven't explained why it *should* be a hard limit JUST because you *don't wanna or don't like it*.....Many , many people would find it odd to have the *s* taken out of D/s.

agirl

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)

Post #: 172

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 8:53:47 AM

gooddogbenji

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

If a master or mistress told a sub to jump off of a skyscraper and they did it to please their master or mistress, does that mean they weren't suicidal?

Quite possibly, depending on their mindset. Suicidal is the desire to end your own life. If your desire is not to end your life, but to bring your Owner happiness, then it is highly debatable if it constitutes suicidal or not. It is, however, suicide.

In the same vein, if your desire is not to do the anal humpy humpy with another man, but to please your Owner, then you aint bisexual.

Yours,

benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)

Post #: 173

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 8:54:03 AM

defiantbadgirl

Posts: 2988
Joined: 11/14/2005
Status: offline

I still can't believe that 9 pages later, not a single male sub has said bisexual activities are a hard limit. I'm beginning to think I should forget dominating anyone and just become a sub.

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)

Post #: 174

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 8:59:50 AM

defiantbadgirl

Posts: 2988
Joined: 11/14/2005
Status: offline

The reason it "should" be a hard limit is simply that if a person was straight, their own sexual orientation would make the deed impossible for them to perform.

(in reply to agirl)

Post #: 175

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 8:59:59 AM

gooddogbenji

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline

I'm sure some have it as a hard limit, but I think your argument has led most of us to focus our energies on not laughing/crying/punching the nearest ignorant person.

Yours,

benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)

Post #: 176

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 9:02:12 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

In the same vein, if your desire is not to do the anal humpy humpy with another man, but to please your Owner, then you aint bisexual.

Yours,

benji

I don't know why, but that line is just the best..........

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to gooddogbenji)

Post #: 177

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 9:07:03 AM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

I still can't believe that 9 pages later, not a single male sub has said bisexual activities are a hard limit. I'm beginning to think I should forget dominating anyone and just become a sub.

By all means if there is something about someone's profile that bothers you, do not meet them. I think you are right about something else too, you should not date sub men if you have such issues with all of them because they do not read minds and know what you want them to write in their profile

But I would warn you about something, doms have bisexual experiences also, so you may want to dismiss dom men that do not list it as a hard limit for them.

In fact if I were you I would read through a cross section of all lifestyle orientations, swtich, dom, sub, and see exactly how many people are paranoid about others thinking they "might" engage in bisexuality so they feel they must list it as a hard limit.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)

Post #: 178

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 9:07:07 AM

gooddogbenji

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

The reason it "should" be a hard limit is simply that if a person was straight, their own sexual orientation would make the deed impossible for them to perform.

So it is impossible to get raped by another man?????

Call the supreme court and get those innocent fuckers out of jail, STAT!

(If he asks any questions, just tell him an badly informed woman from a kinky website said so)

Yours,

benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)

Post #: 179

RE: honesty about sexual orientation - 2/19/2007 9:07:37 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl
The reason it "should" be a hard limit is simply that if a person was straight, their own sexual orientation would make the deed impossible for them to perform.

You're wrong. I'm not sure why you feel it "should" do that- but it doesn't.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)

Post #: 180

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