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RE: Getting to know your partner? - 2/27/2007 9:19:20 AM   
juliaoceania


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I think that this is an impossible question to really answer for me because the longer we are together the deeper my submission to him. When did I first submit to BDSM acts? The first day we met in the flesh. How long has we known each other online? Two months. How much time did we spend getting to know each other? The first few weeks we talked intermittently, then we started talking on the phone daily for sometimes hours at a time. I have no clue exactly how much time we spent before we actually met, I do know that the first time I looked into his eyes I knew I was going to submit to him.



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(in reply to valeca)
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RE: Getting to know your partner? - 2/27/2007 9:28:43 AM   
valeca


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Heh, julia, don't make me change the question to 'how much time did you invest in your relationship before you first physically/mentally submitted'!  There were already enough issues with it to begin with!

I interpret your answer to be a few months in total in actually getting to know Sinergy.  Just the impression I got when reading your post.

Great perspective.  Thanks for sharing.


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RE: Getting to know your partner? - 2/27/2007 9:52:06 AM   
Wildfleurs


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quote:

ORIGINAL: valeca

How much time do you invest in getting to know your partner before submitting/accepting submission?

EDIT:
Actually, I'm going to move this post up here so the question is a little clearer.

 I wasn't asking what the 'appropriate' time is, but rather how much time did you invest in getting to know your partner before submitting/accepting submission.

For those not currently involved with a partner, apply the question to past relationships (good and bad).




It was three and a half to four years before ownership was acknowledged/formally established.  After then it was about two years later that we did the first sign of ownership (my labia piercing).  And then it was two years after the piercing that we did the branding, another sign of ownership.  We've never done a collaring though.

C~

Edited after reading responses since there are a few milestones for us.


< Message edited by Wildfleurs -- 2/27/2007 9:56:19 AM >


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RE: Getting to know your partner? - 2/27/2007 10:08:23 AM   
valeca


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Thanks, Wildfleurs!

Those sound like wonderful, well-earned milestones.




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RE: Getting to know your partner? - 2/27/2007 11:05:24 AM   
SirDominic


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Okay, I did miss the intent of the question. For us it was about three months from first email to our first private fetish get together.

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RE: Getting to know your partner? - 2/27/2007 11:37:49 AM   
agirl


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In answer to your question .....over 3 yrs.

agirl



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RE: Getting to know your partner? - 2/27/2007 11:40:55 AM   
canupleaseme


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We emailed and spoke daily and met a few times for 6 months and got to know each other in both a vanilla way and bdsm way verbally. When we became a couple and D/s we were together a matter of 5 days i think before we did anything phsyically and i collared him.  It felt absolutely  the most natural thing to do, even though i had planned to wait quite a long time before we played. Ive now known him a year and been together with him for 6 months and its great

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RE: Getting to know your partner? - 2/27/2007 11:52:18 AM   
psychodoughb0y


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I talked with her online for nearly two years.  There were periods we didn't talk, and periods we talked from the time we woke up to the time we went to sleep.  Overall the times of talking were greater than not.  We became very close, and she was basically my best friend... the person I could talk to about anything.  So far we've been together nearly four months and things are going very well, and I see them continuing to go well in the future.

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RE: Getting to know your partner? - 2/27/2007 11:56:23 AM   
BitaTruble


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quote:

ORIGINAL: valeca

 I wasn't asking what the 'appropriate' time is, but rather how much time did you invest in getting to know your partner before submitting/accepting submission.



He had me from hello. ::grins:: Took a hell of a lot longer before it manifested physically, but the pull was there from the moment we met and we both knew it.

Celeste

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Rock, paper, scissors."

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RE: Getting to know your partner? - 2/27/2007 12:02:51 PM   
MsKatHouston


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I'm still getting to know him and I hope that never changes.  We will both grow as individuals and continue to get to know each other's subtleties and nuances throughout the relationship.  Our attraction was instant, we met and played quickly and it developed fast.  Sometimes, you just know.

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~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

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RE: Getting to know your partner? - 2/27/2007 12:04:18 PM   
jauntyone


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Master and i met through mutual friends. Two weeks after meeting, i moved into his house. A year later we were married.
 
I think it really depends on the individuals involved. For some, it takes no time at all; and yet for others, it takes longer. What's important is that each person work at their own speed instead of trying to fit into what others would call acceptable.

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RE: Getting to know your partner? - 2/27/2007 12:25:35 PM   
valeca


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I love the diversity!

SD--Not a problem.  I saw how the wording could be interpreted both ways.  I appreciate your coming back with the added information.




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~valeca, Owned and Operated by Loraith.

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