myobedience -> RE: Why is the word slave so negative? (3/3/2007 7:21:40 PM)
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ORIGINAL: sweetnurseBBW Having been a slave for 13 years I have noticed there seems to be a war brewing between sub and slave. Why does it matter? Alot we know have different defintions on what a sub a slave is. None are wrong , but why the negative tone? I have seen statements such as " a slave is a mindless drone". "a slave has no rights" a slave is not a free thinker", " a slave is unmotivated" . None of these are true. Why is it a slave gets the negative defintion? I just would like others opinions on the subject. These are my thoughts….. You said, “having been a slave for 13 years;” so not to confuse the issues, I will ask YOU ~~ What is your definition of slave? What rights do you have? How motivated are you? What motivates you? Are you caged, restrained and feed out of a bowl? Do you sleep in the basement on a pallet with no blanket? Do you dress naked? Are you allowed to be a normal woman 24/7/365, wearing your own clothes, thinking your own thoughts? What services do you perform daily? Do you have a job that brings in income into your relationship? If not what do you do all day long? Are you a slave in private and a slave in public? Are you a submissive AND slave or just a slave? Why are you a slave? How did you become a slave? Do you like being a slave? If your master/dom didn’t want you anymore~ Would he release you? Sell you? Would it be a discussion before a release? Are you allowed to cook for dinner what you choose? Does your master/dom share you? Why or why not? Is there love in the relationship? Is love important in a M/s relationship? Are you a sexual slave? Are you a domestic slave? I would ask these questions of you because these are some of the differences floating around, the misconceptions, the ideas, the convoluted thinking of what a slave vs a submissive might, should or would be. I can tell you from what I read, slaves do not like to be called submissives and submissives do not like to be called slaves, not always, not sometimes, but many times. (Not a generalization, so take it for one) Why do submissives become slaves and how? What changes? Why do some submissives say they have a slave heart? What is a slave heart vs a submissive heart? Is one really any better than the other? Why must we argue about titles and labels? Why can’t we just agree that a dom uses a label for his purposes and a woman uses the same label to identify herself? Why do women who have never served as a slave consider themselves a slave? Why do they use that title? Why does a newbie in this lifestyle consider herself a slave and really doesn’t have the foggiest notion of what it means and all she may have done is read some online site? Why do some slaves think they are superior to submissives? So IMHO, sub or slave, doesn’t matter the title, it matters what is in your heart and what your other half finds in you. Also, masters are many times not real masters. Why? They cannot master themselves. Also dominants are not always dominants, they domineer rather than dominate. Many times weak woman and men do not know the difference between control, authority, dominate and domineering? (Notice I said men and women, I didn’t say dom/me, mistress/master, sub/slave.) On another thought ~~ Are all masters doms? Does a master ever identify himself as a dom? And the questions would go on. I, as a woman, want to find a man who compels me to be strong, yet finds me willing to give up authority and control to him, because I find him worthy to give my all to him…mentally, spiritually, psychologically and physically. But never my soul, for my soul belongs to another far greater than any man or woman. Where do you find labels in that context? Yet a D/s dynamic lies embedded in that paragraph. Is D/s M/s? Is M/s D/s? Is D/s BDSM? Is M/s BDSM? Is BDSM D/s? Is BDSM M/s?
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