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If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 8:39:41 AM   
swtrayn


Posts: 222
Joined: 2/21/2007
Status: offline 		Ok, I will admit, I hyjacked this question from the "Ask a Mistress" forum.
I found it interesting and thought I would ask it in this forum.

The question there was "If you're going to play with a submissive/slave, does the person's gender matter to you and if so what is your preference?"

So, I am asking.. .

If you're going to play with A Dom/Top, does the person's gender matter to you and if so what is your preference?" 

_____________________________

"I tried to contain myself -- I escaped..."

"Make sure brain is engaged before SEND key is released"

"Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead."--Lucille Ball

Profile   Post #: 1
RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 8:52:17 AM   
CoyoteWhips


Posts: 45
Joined: 9/11/2006
From: Fitchburg, Mass.
Status: offline 		It's at least 90% important to me to bottom to a woman.  By 90% I mean that there might me a man out there I'd enjoy bottoming to, but I haven't met him, and I'm often attracted to dykes.

Conversely, topping for me isn't sexual.  A butt is a butt when it comes to striping with a whip or a cane.


(in reply to swtrayn)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 9:02:03 AM   
toservez


Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
Status: offline 		I do not mean to answer the question totally indirectly but this is what I am all about.

I do not do casual play so to play in the terms of this question it would be with a person or order by my owner to play with the person. There are times when play is not sexual but most times it is sexual on some level for me even if no sexual contact or any other obvious sexual behavior takes place. The two drives are too closely connected to each other in me.

I am bisexual and have served both men and a woman and also been loaned out for play to both genders. For me it does not really matter what gender as feeding off their enjoyment and pleasure, if just playing, has worked for me.


_____________________________

I am sorry I do not fit Webster's defintion of a slave but thankfully my Master is not Webster.

"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned." - H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama

(in reply to CoyoteWhips)
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RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 9:13:07 AM   
onestandingstill


Posts: 1335
Joined: 8/3/2006
Status: offline 		For me absolutely.
I'm not gay nor am I bi.
I'm also not bi phobic and on very rare occasion have been topped by a girl, topped a girl, and had sexual relations with a girl.
Though most of this was with one of my best friends, my attraction to her was just not there as far as a romantic or submissive involvement
It's not even remotely the same energy exchange for me to play with a woman.
I absolutely prefer men, I absolutely can submit more fully to a man, and sexually (a little unrelated, but relevant) I prefer men.
suzanne

(in reply to swtrayn)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 9:50:01 AM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline 		Not really. I don't have much experience with the female gender (*sniffle* My own sex turns me down 8 times outta 10), but I've done it enough to know that I don't care. If it's for a scene then I require trust and good energy. Relationships are a bit more complicated, naturally.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to swtrayn)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 10:01:41 AM   
daddysprop247


Posts: 1712
Joined: 6/24/2005
From: DC Metro area
Status: offline 		i could only ever serve Men..."playing" with or serving a female is just out of the question. part of it is due to the fact that i am 100% heterosexual, but primarily it's because of the traditional values/beliefs i have regarding gender roles.

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 10:16:17 AM   
lonlyrossInNeed


Posts: 3144
Joined: 10/8/2005
Status: offline 		I am bi curiouse but i would not be bi for just anyone
for me its more about the pleasur im kinda of a big plesur slut so like to be pleasing and i like my pain releas so if im having a stresffuull time and need the releash it dos not matter male or female
but that is just for play .

ross.g

_____________________________

To know what pain is hurts the most
pain is not just a wound in your flesh
pain is a dagger in your heart

(in reply to daddysprop247)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 10:44:21 AM   
nissa


Posts: 125
Joined: 2/28/2007
From: Carson City Nevada
Status: offline 		If I was going to MEET anyone with the purpose of it being relationship wise, yes, the gender matters a great deal.

_____________________________

nissa

(in reply to swtrayn)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 10:52:54 AM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		For me no question it would have to be a man i an\m not remotely interested in wome.  Just my personal choice.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to nissa)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 10:57:27 AM   
sublizzie


Posts: 1252
Joined: 5/26/2004
Status: offline 		Define "play". My favorite scene was cooking for 70 people outdoors, with no electricity and no running water using only Dark Ages appropriate ingredients. Why would I care whether someone was male or female in that scene?

I have been topped by both men and women, but I don't see it as a sexual activity.

(in reply to swtrayn)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 11:08:14 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		if i was to play (which i don't), i would prefer my tops be male Doms because i'm not bi or even bi-curious.

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to swtrayn)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 11:47:52 AM   
swtrayn


Posts: 222
Joined: 2/21/2007
Status: offline 		First off I wanted to thank you all for responding to my question. I like to know how others think and feel.

I have found so far in the 11 years I have been in the lifestyle, that I have only been able to submit to men. 
I have tried in the past to submit to a female Domme/Top, I just couldn't seem able to do it.
I am bi and do very much enjoy a relationship with women, but have not been able to submit to them.

rayn

Wanted to add, that I can't say I NEVER would, just so far in my life I haven't been able to

< Message edited by swtrayn -- 3/7/2007 11:49:46 AM >

_____________________________

"I tried to contain myself -- I escaped..."

"Make sure brain is engaged before SEND key is released"

"Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead."--Lucille Ball


(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 12:26:21 PM   
swtnsparkling


Posts: 1738
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

If you're going to play with A Dom/Top, does the person's gender matter to you and if so what is your preference?" 

Well I don't play casually but-
I have been the submissive of a Male Dominant
I have been the submissive of a Female Dominant
So NOPE doesnt matter to me



_____________________________

Never make anyone a priority who treats you as an option 2003

Walk in Peace
A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better than a "Yes" uttered merely to please



(in reply to swtrayn)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 12:45:26 PM   
StellaByStarlite


Posts: 790
Joined: 2/10/2007
Status: offline 		Hello. =)

Being forced into bi activities is a big turn-on to me, I'll freely admit that. Not sure if that makes me bisexual or just bi-kinky. It would really get the Mister all revved up, so of course that's a big positive, lol. As far as relationships go, I've only gotten emotionally attached to men.   Maybe it just depends on the situation.

Cheers,
Stella

(in reply to swtnsparkling)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 12:58:05 PM   
Artsslave


Posts: 24
Joined: 3/1/2007
Status: offline 		like many, i don't "play" unless i'm in a relationship. But i do know i can only be Topped by a man. i see women as my equal, a partner to be close to, but not my Mistress. i could never kneel to her.

(in reply to StellaByStarlite)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 1:15:34 PM   
Elorin


Posts: 970
Joined: 8/22/2004
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline 		I've been topped by men and women, so the gender doesn't matter. Trust matters. Connection matters. Gender doesn't matter.

(in reply to Artsslave)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 5:33:15 PM   
bearincuffs


Posts: 1904
Joined: 12/16/2006
Status: offline 		If I was going to play with a Dom/Top the gender of the person will matter for me. Since being a gay male, it is only natural for me to play strictly with someone of the same sex!

_____________________________

property of Master Dave of the House of Gemini

An it harm none, do as thou wilt
Do what you will, so long as it harms none
An it harm none, do what thou will
That it harm none, do as thou wilt
Eight words the Wiccan Rede fulfill

(in reply to swtrayn)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 5:54:33 PM   
PlayfulOne


Posts: 1047
Status: offline 		Nope doesn't matter,  I can take a whip to either.

K

< Message edited by PlayfulOne -- 3/7/2007 5:55:08 PM >

(in reply to bearincuffs)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 5:56:50 PM   
FukinTroll


Posts: 6277
Joined: 2/6/2007
From: Under a bridge
Status: offline 		I thought the Golf shoe was the new whip.

_____________________________

I'm the guy your girl is thinking about when she is fucking you!

TrollTopia
Greedy Groupie!

The Mods have me on speed Spank!! Gotta luv'em.

(in reply to PlayfulOne)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: If you're going to play...... - 3/7/2007 6:33:47 PM   
petdave


Posts: 2479
Status: offline 		Funny, i was also thinking about "borrowing" the question to expand it a bit
i consider myself to be heterosexual, in that i'm only sexually attracted to women, and, quite frankly, i usually don't get along with other men socially either. So i would only have a D/s relationship with a woman.
However, if i were single, i would scene with a male Top, including submitting to sexual use, in order to get a bondage & pain "fix", because i'm just needy that way


(in reply to FukinTroll)
Profile   Post #: 20
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