RE: Online representation (Full Version)

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BlkTallFullfig -> RE: Online representation (3/16/2007 5:44:59 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: EmeraldSlave2
I have VERY low empathy, can’t stand mingling, small talk, socialization, but I have to do it every day so I’ve learned how to do it well

quote:

  As much as we all like to SAY we’re open and welcoming, the reality is that I don’t like most people, I don’t have much in common with most of them, and I can’t stand the social ice breaking process it takes to get there.
I feel the same way, but from a different perspective interestingly enough.   I don't like people because I'm very empathic, often feel and take on negativity from people around me.   I also cannot stand the phoniness of pretending to like each other, while trying desperately to find something in common (like "did you watch the latest tv show, and see how hot that famous useless person is?").    M

P.S.  Where is troll's answer to his own post?



Mikal -> RE: Online representation (3/16/2007 5:54:50 PM)

quote:

Do you feel you are giving yourself a fair representation of your personality, thoughts, and ideas in your posts?

For the most part... I edit for spelling whereas I can't take back a mis-pronounced word [:D], but other than that... what I post is what is in my head at the time. Like now:

I WUV LADY TIGER!!! She's the bestest, sexyest, most wonderfulest Lady! [sm=flowers.gif] To sing praises of her that would do her justice would render choirs mute and musicians fingerless.
(One thread down, several hundered to go... *grins*)
 
quote:

Is the manner in which you post reflective of what people will see when/if they meet you in real life?

I think so, one I get talking. In person, I tend to be quiet (unless I'm riled up about something) and I don't like interrupting.
 
quote:

Do you sweeten the pot when you post, chat, cam or phone?

Depends on what the person considers 'sweet'. You've seen my pics *winks*.. the first set is what I normally send/display, sooo.... do YOU think they are a fair representation??
 
quote:

And last but not least…. *drum roll*
 Have you met someone that was contrary to how they present themselves online?

Oh YES! [sm=hair.gif]



PsyVamp -> RE: Online representation (3/16/2007 6:01:57 PM)

I feel I am giving as honest of a representation of my true self as I  possibly can using words alone.
My attitude in person is more or less the same as on the boards.
I like to try to feel a person out when I chat or talk on the phone.  I never promise anything that I have no intentions of delivering.
I have met only a few of the people r/t and so far they seem to keep to their profiles. 
Although, the last guy that I met stated on his profile that he was 5'11".  And he really was, which took me by surprise as I am used to guys exagerating their height by at least 2 inches.

Psy



swtrayn -> RE: Online representation (3/16/2007 6:11:49 PM)



Do you feel you are giving yourself a fair representation of your personality, thoughts, and ideas in your posts?


As I always have said.. "I am just me" I am really not much different online than I am real life. I think that my posts pretty show my personality and thoughts... (only thing i can see different real life is I am  more flirty online without really knowing the person, and real life.. I wait til I know someone better before I flirt.. if that makes sense).

Is the manner in which you post reflective of what people will see when/if they meet you in real life? 

Yes, I am very upfront and what ya see is pretty much what ya get... I even make sure people even know that I am a BBW..

  Do you sweeten the pot when you post, chat, cam or phone?

No, as I stated above, what ya see (and hear) is what ya get.


Have you met someone that was contrary to how they present themselves online?

Sadly, yes, I met a person whos personality was nothing like what they showed and shared online and over the phone. And even the picture that was shared didn't look like the person at all.
But, I have learned well to use my gut feeling when I talk to someone to get a feel for them, make sure they are pretty consistant on personality and so forth. So, if something feels not quite right, it probably isn't.






leakylee -> RE: Online representation (3/16/2007 7:44:33 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: FukinTroll

All righty here we go!
 
Do you feel you are giving yourself a fair representation of your personality, thoughts, and ideas in your posts?
 
Is the manner in which you post reflective of what people will see when/if they meet you in real life?
 
Do you sweeten the pot when you post, chat, cam or phone?
 
And last but not least…. *drum roll*
 Have you met someone that was contrary to how they present themselves online?


My posts i dont think give a full representation of me. I know that I have come back and read some them. I have wondered what in all hells what I was thinking when I wrote them. They sounded really amusing in my head, but they didnt convey that. Which is kinda odd, cuz I do have a very sarcastic humor.

Now when it comes to im, email, phone, I am exactly as I am in real life. I rarely hold anything in reserve. It just isnt really worth it to me.

I have only met one person really that wasnt what I expected. That wasnt so much any falseness portrayed, just portions of personality withheld. Sometimes them stalker types hide that mess pretty well. But out of the meets, and all the people I have talked to, there was just the one, that was scary..

lee



kyraofMists -> RE: Online representation (3/16/2007 7:59:53 PM)

I have been instructed to answer this post on behalf of my Lord, KnightofMists (as if you guys didn't already know that *g*).

His posts very accurately reflects his thoughts, ideas and portions of his personaility.  The part of his personality that few get to see is a childlike playfulness.  He is as much a flirt in person as he can be online.  And yes, he looks as good in his leathers in person as he does in his pic  *w*

Depending on the situation he is in, he will be very much the same as what is seen in his posts.  At a formal lifestyle event he is more reserved and quiet.  Like me he does not enjoy small talk but loves intelligent conversation.  He prefers to be on the outskirts of things and watch what goes on around him.

Relaxing at home will bring out his playful nature.  Much of our time at home is spent laughing and having a good time.

Sweet is not something that I think many would use to describe his posts.  He is blunt and direct; the medium is irrelevant.

He told me that yes, he has met people who were different offline than online, but that is because online only gave him a limited perspective of the person.  The perspective gained online was accurate and meeting face to face just added new dimensions to the person and the personality.

Knight's kyra



dawntreader -> RE: Online representation (3/16/2007 8:11:15 PM)

quote:

Do you feel you are giving yourself a fair representation of your personality, thoughts, and ideas in your posts?


i hope so - it is certainly my intention
 
quote:

Is the manner in which you post reflective of what people will see when/if they meet you in real life?  


again, it is my hope and intention, but people will see you according to their unigue perception
 
quote:

Do you sweeten the pot when you post, chat, cam or phone? 


no

quote:

  Have you met someone that was contrary to how they present themselves online?


yes, a few times [&:]

quote:

What I believe you really need or want to know about me in my posts are factual.  I really don't have any skeletons in the closet to speak of.  I am everything I purport myself to be (or more - I'm really not into the ego thing).  There might be things that I do not mention here that a partner might wish to know, but nothing illegal, unethical or immoral (except for that whole BDSM thing).  My views can be utilized for the betterment of my peers, but my life isn't necessarily yours to dissect. 
by mstrjx 

Can i say ditto here? i really could not have put my own thoughts together as well as this...



Vendaval -> RE: Online representation (3/17/2007 3:03:24 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: FukinTroll
All righty here we go!

(Pulls out map and compass)

Do you feel you are giving yourself a fair representation of your personality, thoughts, and ideas in your posts?
 
Yes

Is the manner in which you post reflective of what people will see when/if they meet you in real life?
 
Yes, I am very blunt but polite at the same time.

Do you sweeten the pot when you post, chat, cam or phone?

What for?  Best to be real and not a caricature of yourself.

And last but not least…. *drum roll*

Have you met someone that was contrary to how they present themselves online?

Yes, of course.  Those who were married or living with a woman and did not reveal that information, people who used photos 10 years or more older, people who lied about their level of experience, etc.



StellaByStarlite -> RE: Online representation (3/17/2007 6:05:20 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: FukinTroll

All righty here we go!
 
Do you feel you are giving yourself a fair representation of your personality, thoughts, and ideas in your posts?
 Not at all. The typed word isn't my best communication skill, lol. I'm much wittier, and more articulate when face-to-face. And cooler. Heh
Is the manner in which you post reflective of what people will see when/if they meet you in real life?
 Yes and no. I tend to lurk and read more then actually post, because I am an observer and like to stand outside of group dynamics. On the other hand, it's easier to get me included in conversations in real life. it really depends. In a larger group situation, I'm more likely to keep quiet and just listen. but if it's just one on one, I'll open up more.
Do you sweeten the pot when you post, chat, cam or phone?
 Yes. Especially when I post. I rarely go the "harsh truth" route with anybody anyway, unless I know them extremely well. That goes double for online, since it's difficult if not impossible to truely get to know somebody in this medium.
And last but not least…. *drum roll*
 Have you met someone that was contrary to how they present themselves online? Yes! But in a good way.. I've chatted with people that came across as total assholes online but in real life were delightful and charming. That's why I'm more inclined to give folks the benefit of the doubt. It's less hassle that way. =)



LaTigresse -> RE: Online representation (3/17/2007 6:10:09 AM)

Awwww Mikal, a little Payton and now you are singing my praises. You goomba! 



LaMistressa -> RE: Online representation (3/17/2007 6:12:36 AM)

I think I'm pretty close to the same personality online as off - I'm cranky and a smartass even in my sleep. But always remember, "Objects in the Mirror are Closer than they Appear."

Okay, I need more coffee.



juliaoceania -> RE: Online representation (3/17/2007 8:13:22 AM)

quote:

Do you feel you are giving yourself a fair representation of your personality, thoughts, and ideas in your posts?

Sometimes I do, and sometimes I do not

quote:

Is the manner in which you post reflective of what people will see when/if they meet you in real life?


I  love to laugh, and will laugh at just about anything. I have a dry sarcastic sense of humor. I do not know if this translates into my posts... I think I can come off more serious than I actually am. I am extroverted and at times bubbly

quote:

Do you sweeten the pot when you post, chat, cam or phone?


No

quote:

And last but not least…. *drum roll*
 Have you met someone that was contrary to how they present themselves online?


Men often lie about their height, and everyone but my Daddy did lie about this



unsung -> RE: Online representation (3/17/2007 8:15:33 AM)

Tell me your interpretation and I may tell you if you are correct in what you see more likely however I will wonder off and interpret your assessment.  Yes I am pretty much the same identity here as I am in the real world - I am an introvert and protective. 

No I don't believe I have met anyone contrary to how they presented themselves online vs realtime.  I think my interpretation was perhaps misdirected by other factors that may have been acting as a filter.  The only thing that does not seem to align between online and real with many are these profile pictures.  And  people that are posting  their pre-30's image.  Gaud it is not the same 15 to 20 years later.

edit to add protective as it came to thought when I backed out of this thread



ownedgirlie -> RE: Online representation (3/17/2007 8:35:45 AM)

~fast reply~

Very much like Emerald, I let very few people "in" because I don't want to have to worry about fakes and lies and whether or not to trust. 

While my thoughts, values, sense of humor, and overall view of the world remains the same whether I'm online or offline, I am probably more blunt and to the point online.  Offline I talk a lot and am more energetic.  I'm usually online when I'm trying to wind down or relax, which may explain that.

I've met people who were not at all as I understood them to be online.  Misrepesentation of self won't get someone far wtih me.  I've met some who were exactly as I understood them to be from online interaction and it was truly a delight each time.



LaTigresse -> RE: Online representation (3/17/2007 2:25:50 PM)

I think that at least on here the more a person posts the better idea the readers get of the person behind the type.



angelic -> RE: Online representation (3/17/2007 2:32:09 PM)

Great thread!  Actually i am more contrary and more of a cynic here than i am in r/l.  In r/l i tend to be more the funny smartass sort.  And i tend to speak my mind more in r/l than i do here.  Here i am more select about what i say because all anyone here has about me are words on a screen. 

i tend to 'coach' what i say here in a way that hopefully offends fewer rather than the masses.  In r/l i would tell you exactly what i think and why without 'watching' what i say.



wandersalone -> RE: Online representation (3/18/2007 12:20:01 AM)

Do you feel you are giving yourself a fair representation of your personality, thoughts, and ideas in your posts?

I think that anyone who reads a lot of my posts would be able to get a basic understanding of the type of person I am. My posts in casual banter, health and safety and the random stupidity section as well as other forums can all be quite different from eachother as I write the posts for a different reason - to make people laugh,to educate, to show my support, mention my own experiences etc.
 
Is the manner in which you post reflective of what people will see when/if they meet you in real life?

At a first meeting with anyone I tend to get quite shy and I react by being either tongue tied or extremely talkative, I am working on finding a happy medium to this!  In person as on here I definitely can change from topic to topic and humour to serious in a millisecond.
 
My many 'acquaintances' that I have in real life would probably say that I am very much like the person I am in my posts, the very few people who know me closely would say that behind the facade of the light and breezy, always smiling and laughing, slightly eccentric person is a very deep thinker who cares too much at times and often feels most alone when surrounded by people.

Do you sweeten the pot when you post, chat, cam or phone?

Smiles, I liked this question. What you see is what you get with me. I generally do make an effort not to swear in emails or on the phone with someone I haven't met if they may be offended but the odd 'buggar' or 'shit' may creep in.

Have you met someone that was contrary to how they present themselves online?

Yes definitely both in a positive and negative way, people who sent me very old photos that had no similarity to what they now looked like, people who wrote me very long and interesting emails then didn't say a word when we met and the best ones are the meetings with people whom I have thought ok they seem nice and then meet them and find that we are still talking and laughing 5 hours later.... now those are the best! 
 
I met someone for a coffee recently and he said that I was a 'more strange than he thought I would be but in a nice way'!!!! grins, I took it as a compliment.



hisannabelle -> RE: Online representation (3/18/2007 12:27:12 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: FukinTroll

All righty here we go!
 
Do you feel you are giving yourself a fair representation of your personality, thoughts, and ideas in your posts? usually - i certainly try to.
 
Is the manner in which you post reflective of what people will see when/if they meet you in real life? pretty much. i can be much quieter in real life, but also much more outgoing, depending on the situation. i am similarly absentminded but a lot less abrasive, usually, in real life - i can be pretty abrasive in some of my posts here.
 
Do you sweeten the pot when you post, chat, cam or phone? no. i don't feel i have any reason to.
 
And last but not least…. *drum roll*
 Have you met someone that was contrary to how they present themselves online? no. i've met...somewhere in the realm of ten online friends offline, and they were all pretty much how they acted online. then again, i talked to them on a regular basis online and sometimes on the phone for awhile before we met offline, too.



RobertCloud -> RE: Online representation (3/18/2007 12:57:49 AM)

quote:
Do you feel you are giving yourself a fair representation of your personality, thoughts, and ideas in your posts?

I do my best to be exactly who I am in my representation online as I am in real-life. Of course, there will be many things you will not see because circumstances will not arise online that will in real-life.
I remember once that a man told me I was the most arrogant son-of-a-bitch he had ever met. My response was to him that he needed to leave my mother out of it. I was indeed arrogant and I prided myself on that but I was a self-made asshole my mother had nothing to do with it.

There are other times I am the gentlest of people you will meet, with a truly kind soul. I will not harm a spider, I capture them and carry them outside if I can do so, I only kill them if I have no option. I have actually stopped and cried over an animal that I have accidentally hit as I put it on the side of the road and covered it up.

No, I am not trying to say anything special, just.... I am who I am... here... and everywhere... and my profile truly is the way I am...

quote:

Is the manner in which you post reflective of what people will see when/if they meet you in real life?
 
Very much so, but again, it does depend on the circumstances. If the post is one that is in a hostile environment then that is a side you will see of me and you may not see that in real-life as that may not be the environment we are surrounded by. Having coffee or eating a meal is very different than posting a comment on a forum.
 
quote:

Do you sweeten the pot when you post, chat, cam or phone?
 
No... I give you exactly who I am... It is the same way I would answer the comment in person as I would here. No matter what the venue is. I might talk softer on the phone, but only because I do not want to blast your ear off.
 
quote:

Have you met someone that was contrary to how they present themselves online?
As many have said, have not we all. Have had several people send me pictures that were not even of them, and others that had only sent pictures of faces or in one case a lady sent her in lingerie and it was nice but her face, what teeth she had were so tobacco stained that I could not have stood there. She knew I was a non-smoker and had problems with smokers so she had hid the fact she was one. I can handle a smoker that will keep from smoking around me and who is not a really heavy smoker, but she smelled of smoke so bad that I had to step back after giving her a hug because I had had to hold my breath.



RobertCloud -> RE: Online representation (3/18/2007 1:12:06 AM)

quote:

Men often lie about their height, and everyone but my Daddy did lie about this


LOL... You are only given certain choices... The nearest choice to my correct height is 6'-1... I am actually 6'-0 3/4... So I chose the one nearest to my correct height... that is not a lie, it is choosing what is available. Depending on which shoes I am wearing I can actually gain up to 2 inches in height.. but my most common shoes have 1 inch heels.



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