RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (Full Version)

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DiurnalVampire -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/19/2007 5:16:54 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RWAble

But what about the ones that don't approach? Won't see no way to do it. The shy ones? You miss out on so much.


Doubtful, if they dont approach and we dont see them come up anywhere, we dont miss what we didnt know was there in the first place.  However, these ultra shy ones are ikely also not going to be the ones saying or demainding things in their initial (or any other) emails that will turn us off right away.

DV



thetammyjo -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/19/2007 6:09:23 AM)

See the idea that someone could turn me on or turn me off via one email is really strange to me.

I don't think of those who send me notes as "types" or "categories" because I try to take each note as it is.

In general I never say "yes" or "no" but instead ask a return question. If the person clearly does not live within easy driving distance of me, I ask how they will change that. If they clearly haven't read my profile, I say "please read my profile".

So far those people who just simply do not write back to me.



GoddessKai -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/19/2007 8:34:27 AM)

"Will you pop my balls with your high heels Mistress?"
Can we say no? Come on now, don't be a dumbass.

"Send pictures of your feet."
Even if I took pictures of my feet, I wouldn't send them out so they can be your jerkoff material.

"Do you seek a full toilet slave? I am experienced in golden, roman and brown showers."
Uh.. gross. Just.. no. NO. I said NO.

When asked what skills a slave has to bring to the table that will differentiate them from the other dozens of like-minded messages I get each day, the slave/sub has nothing to say, or comes off with one of their kinks or by telling me they've never had their asshole plundered. I don't care if you're an anal virgin... do you do windows? ;)

The typical "blackmail me" messages.

Those that demand my AOL/Yahoo/MSN names.

Subs that hope to catch my attention with lists of what they will and will not do for me, to make me happy.

Any sub that expects me to drop everything on a dime just to reply to their endless messages that usually consist of asking "what I would do to them."

Subs that seem alright at first, and then one of their kinks turns quickly into an obsession and they won't shut up about it. Every other word out of their mouth has something to do with the aforementioned kink/obsession and their world revolves around it completely. This is especially annoying when I've told them that I'm not interested in such a kink. Guh. GET THE PICTURE.



MissTreatinyou -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/19/2007 10:46:21 AM)

I personally can get turned off by someone's chosen screen name alone. Like anyone with 69 as part of their name unless they really did happen to be born in that year.



TravelingDomme -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/19/2007 11:17:06 AM)

Those that cannot or will not read. Despite being told I am not a member of the lonely hearts club they wish to tell Me of how they would want an "exclusive" relationship.

Those that wish to top from the bottom
Those that make reference to sexually pleasing Me (how would they know what pleases Me)



SweetDommes -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/19/2007 2:53:56 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RWAble

Hum....makes one wonder why they even bother. To get lost in the many folds of humanity. A true servant, does so in and out of the lifestyle. It's not a game, it is what they are. They are happy to do so in their daily life, because it gives them the pleasure they seek in giving. Thus they hide in the forest. Waiting for the One to claim them. The One with more knowledge about how they feel, than themselves.


If they are hiding in the forest, then they aren't bothering to try.

This isn't a game to us either, and I honestly have no idea why you seem to think that it is.  This is who and what we are - every day, every night, at work, at home, at the grocery store, visiting friends and relatives, etc.  And we still aren't going to go out into the "forest" very often ... we want someone who is brave enough and sure enough of himself to come out into the meadow once in awhile.



thetammyjo -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/19/2007 4:00:56 PM)

These sorts of messages you note, GoddessKai, don't turn me on or off -- that's investing too much emotional energy in an email from a stranger.

And I can't remember the last time I got such an email. Not sure why but most of the notes I get aren't this vulgar.



kc692 -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/19/2007 4:10:52 PM)

I'm a dominant though and it doesn't stand for what I think you are meaning,,,,,am I ok?[:D]



GoddessDustyGold -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/19/2007 4:19:03 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: kc692

I'm a dominant though and it doesn't stand for what I think you are meaning,,,,,am I ok?[:D]

Oh, sweet Lady K!   I needed to smile. Thank you!



DianeB269 -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/19/2007 4:39:11 PM)

That's what I was thinking when I read his message.

quote:

ORIGINAL: ineedotk

"Subs" that tell you what they are going to do to you don't really sound like subs to me.  More like desparate little boys trying to get your attention. 



kc692 -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/19/2007 4:50:52 PM)

Good to see you Dusty. Everyone needs to smile!!!  Don't forget, if you ever need to hear funny stories or to vent, call me!!!![sm=flowers.gif]



VeryMercurial -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/19/2007 5:55:17 PM)

I think the ladies here have covered just about every thing I don't like to hear
from a submissive.



MzMia -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/19/2007 9:33:06 PM)

I love all the posts here and seeing new posters!
Hello MsRose, I hope to see you post more often![:D]



MzMia -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/19/2007 9:38:13 PM)

Thank you for all the wonderful responses ladies!!
I actually thought I had heard them all, but I heard a few new ones tonight!
Whoppeeee!
I will say, for those of us that have not made our D/s match, it can happen.
Maybe a few submissive men will read this thread, and not make these mistakes!



MysticFireTopaz -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/19/2007 11:20:49 PM)

One wrote to me tonight and said at the close of his introductory letter, "I require a picture as I have met enough TV's and males posing as femdoms....just so I can be sure...even with a pic. one can never be sure."
 
He did not include a picture with his response, nor was there one on his profile.  There of course is nothing wrong with asking for a Domme's picture, if worded in a polite, respectful, and non-demanding manner.  I didn't like his attitude and didn't write back.
 
Lady Topaz



MsCfromMelbourne -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/20/2007 4:57:00 AM)

Yesterday a sub wrote to me that he was a young, fit and good looking

I replied "Why are you single?"

His reply was short and sweet.

"Because I enjoy it"

OK......is it just me being picky or was that a really dumb way to attract the interest of a Dominant woman?





GoddessKai -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/20/2007 5:06:31 AM)

In response to thetammyjo:

It's not that I invest much time in them in the first place, it's just that I'm disgusted with the way they approach a woman. ANY woman, Dominant or submissive.

Usually these messages are met with the question "Would you want a man talking like that to your mother or sister?" If the answer is no, then don't do it.

I may be a Domina, but that doesn't mean I like being treated like a whore from someone I've never met before that first message. The rudeness is apalling, because many of them are serious and generally expect a reply.

Oh, as a sidenote, I especially like the "subs" that message me for a first time and tell me I'm fake. Never before have I spoken with them, they know nothing about me aside from what my profile states, and I'm fake. And it's usually because I'm a BBW.
"ur not a reel mistress ur to fat"
Right, as if being a fat chick is going to make me drop to my knees in submission.
[sm=biggrin.gif][sm=ofcourse.gif]



DiurnalVampire -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/20/2007 5:15:18 AM)

I dont think its turned on or off as much as disinterested very quickly.  I believe a first email is a first impression.  If someone is going to make the move to email me in the first place, Id expect them to put their absolute best foot forward. What I should be seeing is the best effort they have to look good and set themselves apart.  If some of these notes are the best they can do, then I see really very little reason to hope it is going to get better later on. I will forgive siliness that comes from nerves for a first email, but I will not forgive rudeness or demands.  I get enough polite, sweet and properly constructed emails that I dont need to bother with the ones who are nasty, demanding and too lazy to write out the words in their sentences to impress their would-be new contact.

but thats just me
DV 



cloudboy -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/20/2007 7:16:52 AM)

quote:

Yes, RWAble, it can be extremely difficult to find ... someone who views servitude the same way the dominant does ...


Most submissives I know love to have someone clean our house, cook our meals, and run errands for us while we are tired. So, I would say we do view it the same way.[X(]

quote:

Tammyjo: See the idea that someone could turn me on or turn me off via one email is really strange to me.

I don't think of those who send me notes as "types" or "categories" because I try to take each note as it is.

In general I never say "yes" or "no" but instead ask a return question. If the person clearly does not live within easy driving distance of me, I ask how they will change that. If they clearly haven't read my profile, I say "please read my profile".

So far those people who just simply do not write back to me.


The real reward is in meeting people F2F. It adds to our experience, it makes coffee taste better, and typically one learns something about himself and others. B/C this is your orientation in meeting others, you don't find yourself disappointed in trifles. You are very sensible in this regard.



MysticFireTopaz -> RE: What "type" of submissive's approach you on here, that turn you OFF? (3/20/2007 10:40:44 AM)

I just got another one that "rubbed me the wrong way."  The guys used the term "dear" three times in his introductory letter.  Now as a salutation, dear is fine, as in "Dear MysticFireTopaz."  Other than that, I don't think it's appropriate, e.g. "I think we'd be a great match, dear," "Looking forward to hearing from you soon, dear," "You sound absolutely wonderful, dear."  The same holds true of other overly familiar terms such as "honey" or "sweetheart."
 
Now I do know of some established couples where the submissive is permitted to call the Domme "dear," and have no problem with that if it works for them, but in an introductory letter???
 
Lady Topaz



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