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starshineowned -> RE: Gagged (3/20/2007 7:14:14 AM)
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On the days that issues bother you deeply between your Dominant and yourself, how do you find you most often and naturally react?
I can only think of one issue that deeply bothered me, and time/trust has pretty much laid that to rest in any sense of being deep.
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Are you gagged by your own thoughts and words and prefer not to discuss it, but knowing in a healthy relationship dependent upon communication that you need to?
99.9% I would gag myself because I know I have the type of personality to leap before I look. So I have learned to take the jumbled up emotions and thoughts into mental bondage until I can straighten them out, and analyze before I open my mouth. If I arrive at a point that I am able to speak on it..then it is because I feel very strongly about it, and have taken the time to weigh in the factors that brought me to that point to begin with.
When I am unable to formulate the words I need to express what I am feeling strongly about..I am allowed to write them down, and then Master will discuss what I have written with me so that he's able to see my face, eyes, body language as well as hear the tone. Often this is easier for me because it's a controlled thing or a ask and answer session rather than just trying to blurt out everything and maintain sense.
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Do you immediately want to share ALL your thoughts and words until it’s at the brink of disrespect, and you are gagged with the command, “Enough” or even possibly the real gag?
A few times this happens but it isn't related to deep issue's. It happens more when I talk about a subject that I feel passionate about or strongly about beyond us, and go over the edge to drive a point home. Master usually will say "enough", and thats that..then he explains how he understands what I have being speaking about, and shares his views.
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What solutions in communication do you use to avoid your gag in the relationship?
Again..my gag is usually self imposed on the immediate home front. Often times what I thought was a issue is not really even a issue because I did my own gagging. If I can't work it out in my head..then I write it down to see my thoughts. Most of the time it becomes so trivial of a thing that I often chastise myself for wasting time on it once the rationalization kicks in. Often times these are things that daily life or life outside being a slave in the dynamic most probably would of not brought about self-gagging.
Well Wishes
starshine
Happy slave of Master Delvin
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