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Trophies - 3/21/2007 10:59:38 AM

Lolajolly

Posts: 11
Joined: 11/10/2005
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I have a question that I am asking myself that I am thinking would be interesting to see how other people are thinking about it.

Trophies... trophy wives, trophy subs...

Where does the ill will for them come from. I think for my part it comes from the fact that is something I can and will never be, and if that is the case, how legitimate is that bias?

Post #: 1

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 11:03:55 AM

mixielicous

Posts: 1283
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: Boston area, Massachusetts
Status: offline

i think the problem stems from the fact that the 'trophy' is aware of her status and that changes the mindset.

personally, i would be proud to be called a trophy slave b/c it means Master wants to show me off, is proud of me, and other woman want to be me. not very humble i know, but the idea is enticing, and i think somewhat humiliating, as if you were on display

_____________________________

"lets just say he's a few prawns short of a galaxy"

(in reply to Lolajolly)

Post #: 2

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 11:22:15 AM

onestandingstill

Posts: 1335
Joined: 8/3/2006
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BDSM Trophies = scars from scenes IMO
Trophy wives = a woman who's more valued for her outside than inside IMO
Trophy sub = a Dom who's more interested in what others think he has vs him worrying about what he has IMO.

I hope to never be a trophy, I'd rather be considered the prize.
suzanne

(in reply to Lolajolly)

Post #: 3

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 11:27:07 AM

CreativeDominant

Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lolajolly

I have a question that I am asking myself that I am thinking would be interesting to see how other people are thinking about it.

Trophies... trophy wives, trophy subs...

Where does the ill will for them come from. I think for my part it comes from the fact that is something I can and will never be, and if that is the case, how legitimate is that bias?

Most trophies...the Super Bowl, the Nextel Cup, even your local bowling alley's League Championship...have to be earned through effort. I think that a great part of the ill will that is directed at trophy wives/girlfriends/subs comes about from the fact that these "trophies" are usually much more visually appealing in comparison to their partner. This then becomes associated with the idea, rightly or wrongly, that the trophyholder did not win the trophy but rather, acquired it through the flashing of cash and/or other material goods. Jealousy and envy may also play parts in this.

mixie states that she would like to be a trophy sub...but I am assuming (and yeah, I know that is dangerous) that mixie wants to be seen that way not only for the humiliation factor but also for the pride factor she would feel in hearing her master speak of her in that way and in knowing that she became that through hard work on both their parts and NOT because he just happened to have more cash and more objects to offer her than the next Joe while being as ugly as sin and about as mannerly as a rhino and as intelligent as a gnu. In other words, she wants to be an "earned" trophy, not a "storebought" one.

(in reply to Lolajolly)

Post #: 4

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 11:28:05 AM

MsKatHouston

Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline

I think the ill will comes from the perception others have that the third party actually is that. It diminishes the person's value in another's eyes when the reality may be something entirely different.

For people who actively seek "trophy ___" based strictly on outward appearances and other's opinions so they look better in another's eyes, I just think it's sad but if everyone is getting something out of it...to each their own.

quote:

personally, i would be proud to be called a trophy slave b/c it means Master wants to show me off, is proud of me, and other woman want to be me. not very humble i know, but the idea is enticing, and i think somewhat humiliating, as if you were on display

For me, I see that in a different light than what I typically think of when I think of a trophy wife/sub/hubby, etc. I suppose it's all about how you define trophy ___.

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to onestandingstill)

Post #: 5

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 11:29:39 AM

MsKatHouston

Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline

oh...what you said I agree completely with. You said it much better than I.

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to CreativeDominant)

Post #: 6

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 11:30:49 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

In my first relationship, a friend of my masters other slave one day said to me "You know you're just a trophy slave right?"

The fact is that I'm perfectly happy being a trophy- however I also know I'm a lot more than "just" that.

I think it comes from insecurity of the hotter/younger girl and assuming there can't be any serious value involved.

Now, the fact is that plenty of younger/hotter girls ARE trophies, whether the people involved are willing to admit it or not. And, if they are trophies,then the relationship will eventually end unless more is added to the "trophy" status.

For example, Hugh Hefner and Holly- I have no doubt that Hugh has tons of girls he keeps around just for amusement and fun and trophy goodness. But Holly I think has shown herself to be truly dedicated to Hef, his life, his business and shown herself to be an asset.

Another example would be Donald Trump and Melania.

Trophies can be a lot more than just eye candy.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to onestandingstill)

Post #: 7

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 11:36:59 AM

mixielicous

Posts: 1283
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: Boston area, Massachusetts
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CreativeDominant

mixie states that she would like to be a trophy sub...but I am assuming (and yeah, I know that is dangerous) that mixie wants to be seen that way not only for the humiliation factor but also for the pride factor she would feel in hearing her master speak of her in that way and in knowing that she became that through hard work on both their parts and NOT because he just happened to have more cash and more objects to offer her than the next Joe while being as ugly as sin and about as mannerly as a rhino and as intelligent as a gnu. In other words, she wants to be an "earned" trophy, not a "storebought" one.

not dangerous this time, as you are quite right. an earned trophy is def different than a bought one, and well a girl who is bought i would not consider a trophy at all.... more of a leech if you ask me

but if i do manage to somehow earn that title, yes it would spark a lot of pride.... i mean, who DOESNT want to be shown off as the best possible ____ they could be, as an ideal, and an idol.

quote:

quote: mixielicous

personally, i would be proud to be called a trophy slave b/c it means Master wants to show me off, is proud of me, and other woman want to be me. not very humble i know, but the idea is enticing, and i think somewhat humiliating, as if you were on display

MSKat replied,
For me, I see that in a different light than what I typically think of when I think of a trophy wife/sub/hubby, etc. I suppose it's all about how you define trophy ___.

MSKat, i am curious then, what would this be to you? edit to add, oh, what CD meant?

< Message edited by mixielicous -- 3/21/2007 11:40:39 AM >

_____________________________

"lets just say he's a few prawns short of a galaxy"

(in reply to CreativeDominant)

Post #: 8

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 11:40:18 AM

MsKatHouston

Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline

When I think of tropy wife I think of the bought kind not the earned kind where the relationship for her is strictly based on financial gain and/or status and for him it's showing off a hot chick on his arm at parties.

That's not to say that there are different kinds and I can certainly see the appeal in what you state, but it's the first place my mind goes when hearing that term.

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to mixielicous)

Post #: 9

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 11:42:03 AM

CreativeDominant

Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsKatHouston

oh...what you said I agree completely with. You said it much better than I.

Thank you....

(in reply to MsKatHouston)

Post #: 10

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 11:45:19 AM

dawntreader

Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lolajolly

Trophies... trophy wives, trophy subs...

Where does the ill will for them come from? I think for my part it comes from the fact that is something I can and will never be, and if that is the case, how legitimate is that bias?

Why do you say you will never be one?

Is our definition of them bad or good? Is it envy or are they less worthy than the "non-trophies ? Why do we limit our potential and judge those that seek theirs?
i personally believe there is not any woman on here that could not be a trophy if she wanted to - we are only limited by our thoughts, perceptions, and desire to do what it takes~

(in reply to Lolajolly)

Post #: 11

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 11:49:05 AM

PONYSEEKER

Posts: 364
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline

Dont know really how to explain this but I definatly have to have my sub fill a trophy roll at times. I enjoy doing it and I think she takes great pride in it. I think there is nothing wrong with showing off a good woman and the more people that druel over her the better in my opinion. One night I was out at a vanilla bar and went in the restroom and was taking a leak and this guy comes up next to me and we are talking while leaking and they guy starts talking about this really hot woman... it was my sub. I loved hearing his comments. I really dont think its degrading because I dont think of her as just a trophy of course but it really is nice being able to show a woman off.... its one of the reasons I like show ponies. I show off her looks and her abillities.

(in reply to dawntreader)

Post #: 12

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 12:12:52 PM

mixielicous

Posts: 1283
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: Boston area, Massachusetts
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsKatHouston

When I think of tropy wife I think of the bought kind not the earned kind where the relationship for her is strictly based on financial gain and/or status and for him it's showing off a hot chick on his arm at parties.

That's not to say that there are different kinds and I can certainly see the appeal in what you state, but it's the first place my mind goes when hearing that term.

ah, when i hear trophy ____, i do not automatically think: bought

i think ... well, you know what i think

and on the first things that come to mind back to the OP of where the ill will comes from, i always saw it from other people who found trophy _____ to be too prideful - this whole bought facet, is actually new to me but it makes perfect sense!

ponyseeker, we have the same opinion of Trophy ___ but my own ill will towards myself for desire of this stems from the pride. as a naturally submissive girl and also someone who apparently comes at "slave mindset" a bit naturally [go with me on that part,

] the pride that would UNDOUBTEDLY ensue is very hard for me to accept, and its kind of like tug o war with myself. i am not religious, the least, but pride being a sin well i could always understand ... and well i could go on and on but i am sure it doesnt need that much explaining for you to understand what i am trying to say

i digress

_____________________________

"lets just say he's a few prawns short of a galaxy"

(in reply to MsKatHouston)

Post #: 13

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 12:25:43 PM

PONYSEEKER

Posts: 364
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline

Mix,
Makes perfect sense to me. One way of combating this is to create a "public cacoon" so to speak. Whenever I am in public with my sub I kind of make it so that we are in our own little world and she feels protected and comforted by the actions between us and others have a tendency to feel jelouse. I have actually been doing this for years and didnt really notice it that much until weird shit started to happen like they held up a plane for me at LAX (before 911) so that I could say goodbye (Airline got in trouble for it)
We are never crowded out at Disney by people and usually if the ride is too crowded I have had employees of Disney remove people from the ride for us. Its really weird and I dont understand it but for some reason it weilds a ton of power. Oh, on the plane that they held up there was a new Pastor at the gate and when he saw the scene taking place I guess had everyone at the gate pray for us after we left LOL. By creating the "cacoon" type deal it seems to replace sub pride with self confidence and rassurance.

(in reply to mixielicous)

Post #: 14

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 12:26:48 PM

MsKatHouston

Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline

quote:

I really dont think its degrading because I dont think of her as just a trophy of course but it really is nice being able to show a woman off

Which is, IMO, the difference between valuing a person for looks alone or valuing them for the whole package. I don't think there is anything at all wrong with showing off someone you are proud of. Or of enjoying being the one who is being shown off.

Just a perception thing. Interesting.

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to mixielicous)

Post #: 15

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 12:29:34 PM

MsKatHouston

Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline

I could start a whole other thread on that post and it is an interesting concept that my sub and I have been discussing at length recently. Specifically the energy flow between us and using that power to achieve certain goals. I'm not sure if that's exactly what you were getting at but your post reminded me of it.

Didn't mean to derail...

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to PONYSEEKER)

Post #: 16

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 12:30:47 PM

Hime

Posts: 149
Joined: 10/31/2006
From: Vegas
Status: offline

For Me....
A trophy is a symbol of my dedication and ability.
A trophy boosts my pride and gives me joy when it is acknowledged by my peers.

And yet....
Even a trophy needs attention if I want it to keep its sparkle.

(display them, protect them, and tend to them)

~ xoxo

(in reply to Lolajolly)

Post #: 17

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 12:33:18 PM

toservez

Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
Status: offline

My definition of a trophy relationship is any person or both are for the most part only together for one aspect not considered politically correct. For men it is usually women’s looks and for women it is usually the man’s money but there can be other reasons and I have certainly seen many power exchange relationships basically just based on the power exchange and little else that to me would qualify as trophy as well.

Why do people use the term as a put down is another story and to me it is done out of insecurity. It is put down 101 when seeing an older guy with a younger attractive female and not knowing anything about their actual relationship. It boils down to the qualities I think I have are better qualities then a person I am judging I think they have that I think I do not have, the I am better here are my reasons for it.

To me as long as two people are in a happy and healthy relationship, I salute them. If the happiness is derived based on things that would not make me happy who cares.

_____________________________

I am sorry I do not fit Webster's defintion of a slave but thankfully my Master is not Webster.

"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned." - H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama

(in reply to mixielicous)

Post #: 18

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 12:33:34 PM

Lolajolly

Posts: 11
Joined: 11/10/2005
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I should have expressed more fully what I meant.

By trophy subs I mean those sort of glorious looking creatures whom you see trotted about the clubs, whose every movement and reaction seems to exemplify the meaning and physicality of beauty, no matter how extreme the play... and yet sometimes I get the feeling that it is more about that show and showcase than anything else...

I am sure my views are colored by my own envy, to some degree.

I also think that there are some escoteric beauties which any person can achieve, but physical beauty is not something every person can achieve simply by trying harder.

(in reply to dawntreader)

Post #: 19

RE: Trophies - 3/21/2007 12:35:11 PM

PONYSEEKER

Posts: 364
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsKatHouston

I could start a whole other thread on that post and it is an interesting concept that my sub and I have been discussing at length recently. Specifically the energy flow between us and using that power to achieve certain goals. I'm not sure if that's exactly what you were getting at but your post reminded me of it.

Didn't mean to derail...

Thats exacly what I am talking about. I dont understand it and its something my sub pointed out to me.... and when I am alone it does not exist but when we are together its definaly a force so to speak.

(in reply to MsKatHouston)

Post #: 20

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