RE: Man Handled.... (Full Version)

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WhiplashSmile -> RE: Man Handled.... (4/9/2007 4:00:11 PM)

OK, you guys had talked about this before hand and came to an agreement? Right?  If so, then what he did was clearly a violation of that agreement.  I've had one relationship with a Domme myself.  Personally, you did the right thing smacking him in the face.  You should have slapped his ass back at the evelator and verbally used your Domme skills to treat him as if he were a submissive.  LOL...   An eye for an eye type of thing, to get your point across clear.   I'm suprised you did not Woman handle him in the room by grabing his hair.  Then again, he might have enjoyed that too much.

So wack wack across the face.   Doms like this give the rest of us a bad name.  More so when we are the type that is willing to be in  Dom/Domme relationship.  I read what FukinTroll had to say, and I believe this to be most correct.  





MDJour -> RE: Man Handled.... (4/9/2007 4:06:05 PM)

That could very well be true. I had thought about his pursuits vs mine, and how it would play out. Unfortunately, his reality and plans happened before any discussions happened. I truly never expexted that he would change his agenda because of me. All I want out of people is to be treated with courtesy.
MV



wfsubseeking1 -> RE: Man Handled.... (4/9/2007 4:39:56 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: FukinTroll

I think you already know this guy, it just shocked you because you didn’t see it sooner. There are a lot of D’s with delicate egos, they may be huge egos but can be crushed with a powder puff. This guy cannot get enough conquest to fill the hole of inadequacy he feels deep inside. He most likely has a large collection of subs and is always on the hunt for more. Nevertheless the greatest boon to his ego would be showing a Domme her sub side. He feels that would be the crowning jewel in his headspace of uber domliness.
 
There is no cure for this sort of thing and most who suffer from it lack the discipline to identify it, work through it, and find a good place with it. The irony is they can be dynamic charismatic individuals who have life experiences and a life style that others would envy, but they cannot see their forest for the trees. It is the same for each sex and both sides of the kneel. It is just more prolific amongst male D’s.
 Personally I have nothing to gain from trying to assert dominance upon a Domme and a lot to lose. The most painful loss would be that of a good friend, confidant, and peer.


my apologies for responding in this area but You hit the nail on the head!!

seeking



MDJour -> RE: Manhandled.... (4/9/2007 6:51:56 PM)

Well. this little scenario has taken an evil turn. I have been told that my face slapping would be receipricated in a most unpleasant manner. I'll be in touch with all Atlanta's DM's and Munch organizers.



FukinTroll -> RE: Manhandled.... (4/9/2007 7:54:28 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MDJour

Well. this little scenario has taken an evil turn. I have been told that my face slapping would be receipricated in a most unpleasant manner. I'll be in touch with all Atlanta's DM's and Munch organizers.


Okie dokie... it is starting to look more like he is an abuser and not a D.



MDJour -> RE: Manhandled.... (4/9/2007 8:18:21 PM)

Ah yes, abusive in nature, so unexpected and disappointing. That's OK, it will be handled accordingly I'm L&L. Details are available via private email.
Blessing to All, Yours, Mistress V.



BossyShoeBitch -> RE: Man Handled.... (4/9/2007 9:28:11 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

Speaking as someone who has dated and does date female dominants sometimes as equals sometimes as the most glorious of submissives, I find what he did beyond the pale and if he was in my local area I would deal with him harshly.  I would first dress him down privately and if he admitted the mistake I would simply request he appologize.  I feel that if he can set his ego aside before me as well as having the humanity to appologize, he should be given a second chance.  HOWEVER, if he got all pissy with me I would ban his ass instantly and permanently PERIOD.

On the two occasions I have reached out and yanked a Dommes hair like that, the first was after a bit of indirect flirting filled with innuendo and was met with "oh god but not here" and the other "back away or this knife will be going home with you" which I of course did begging forgiveness, the begging was because it was a 12" chefs knife and the forgiveness because I had either read the clues wrong or should have waited till I got her alone.

However, you seem to have laid out the groundwork pretty clear and while the first instance could simply be due to your ample charms the second incident was the sort that if you were with me, he would have been leaving ON his shield as they say.  That was a seriously fucked up thing to do and as Troll says, the guy is an insecure little pathetic shit of a man.

edited to ad:  I have the UTMOST respect for female dominants and in NO way consider them to be submissives in waiting or any of that kind of bullshit. 


How do I apply for the dating Domme postion?  Sounds very, v e r y, v  e  r  y, interesting...[sm=crop.gif]



WhiplashSmile -> RE: Manhandled.... (4/9/2007 11:57:30 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: FukinTroll

quote:

ORIGINAL: MDJour

Well. this little scenario has taken an evil turn. I have been told that my face slapping would be receipricated in a most unpleasant manner. I'll be in touch with all Atlanta's DM's and Munch organizers.


Okie dokie... it is starting to look more like he is an abuser and not a D.

I'm really starting to dispise the damn abuser types with very little self control.



Vendaval -> RE: Manhandled.... (4/10/2007 12:04:53 AM)

I am sorry to hear that, MDJour.  Please let us know how
this matter is resolved.  (And to clarify my earlier post,
bitchslapping in response to having your ass slapped is
what I meant.)   
 


quote:

ORIGINAL: MDJour

Well. this little scenario has taken an evil turn. I have been told that my face slapping would be receipricated in a most unpleasant manner. I'll be in touch with all Atlanta's DM's and Munch organizers.



MDJour -> RE: Manhandled.... (4/10/2007 4:32:33 AM)

Vendaval,  The resolution of this is undetermined. But perhaps will serve as a lesson to some, regarding respect and public behaviour.
BossyShoeBitch, not being sure of the context in which your post was made, everyone is entitled to a personal life. He asked me to pursue a course on a personal level, I was not looking. Hence I will return to my priorities and be done with wasting time.
It is sad that some have to fluff their own egos with abusive behaviour and Threats. That's OK, a copy of the email with the specific threat has been placed in the proper hands.
I appreciate all the comment and words of reason and support on this board. And I'll be back to chat tonight.
Peace,
Mistress V.



MsCfromMelbourne -> RE: Manhandled.... (4/10/2007 6:45:29 AM)

Agree with everyone and add a point:

Power struggles. 

Conflict between Dominants is usually all about power, not sex or manners or respect

His power play was not subtle. He managed to make you lose your cool and slap him (which is a win of sorts), but his email was a super stupid follow up. 

You will win this power game and come out with more scene respect than him.  Just watch out for retaliation.  Revenge is a dish best served cold

With the utmost respect I suggest you choose your battles wisely.  You need more allies than enemies in your local scene (as do we all)



SirDominic -> RE: Manhandled.... (4/10/2007 8:24:40 AM)

Agree with you comments about powerplays, but in this case I don't think that is what it was. He stepped way beyond the protocols of what is considered acceptable behavior. He probably had a fantasy about "having" a Domme, and thought treating her roughly would get him that. Quite frankly, I think Mistress V let him off easy with a face slap; he shoulda been punched out.

Mistress V, you have your priorities in order. You are a Domme I would be proud to call a friend.

Namaste, Sir Dominic



FukinTroll -> RE: Manhandled.... (4/10/2007 12:04:27 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MDJour

a copy of the email with the specific threat has been placed in the proper hands.

Mistress V.



If you are a victim of a cyber-stalker or online harassment there is an agency that can help.

Cybersnitch

Report to this site and they will respond rather quickly. Make sure you have all the information ready. Hate mail, IM conversations, etc... Anything you have. They will contact local authorities in your area as well as authorities in your stalkers area and your troubles will diminish rather quickly.



LadyIce -> RE: Man Handled.... (4/10/2007 2:02:30 PM)

I am not a switch, and I would not date a male Dom.
If I was with a male Dom, I would not be at all surprised at those actions.
Why are you?



FukinTroll -> RE: Man Handled.... (4/10/2007 2:06:19 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyIce

I am not a switch, and I would not date a male Dom.
If I was with a male Dom, I would not be at all surprised at those actions.
Why are you?


Perhaps it is your life experience that is motivating this post. Nevertheless we have a number of D/D couples here that show just how wonderful a D/D relationship can be.



LadyIce -> RE: Man Handled.... (4/10/2007 2:11:53 PM)

I have seen a few in my lifetime also, but they are few and far between.
I can count the D/D couples that I have seen on one hand.
Anything is possible, but it is rare that it lasts, in general.
So again, I will not date a Dominant male.



KinkMasterDave -> RE: Man Handled.... (4/10/2007 3:12:08 PM)

PREVIOUSLY POSTED IN A REPLY:
From a male Dom point of view, he overstepped his bounds.
Again from a male dom prospective, "no" has multiple meanings to many of us. No to me can mean:
1) No
2)im moving to fast.( usually in play)
3)Try a different approach or route. ( usually with new experiences)
4) YES!
5) i really want you to but want to "pretend" to resist
6) Various other things.

These are not definations i gave "no" these are definations that have been implied by subs/women. Hence it is sometimes confusing( and i get my head bit off about it on some occassions) to know what you mean by no... not all NOs mean no.

I always found a dom couple being togather is like walking through a mine field. you have two dom personalities, this is like putting two bulls in a pen with 1 cow.


MY RESPONSE:
While I hate to admit it due to flying criticism, I agree that NO, doesn't always mean NO... I've run into that TOO MANY times in my personal walk to say it isn't so.

The one point I would seem to get hung up on though... is that Dom-to-Dom relationships, should never show any type of disrespect of personal lifestyle integrity in front of any others (i.e. in front of subs or other Dominants)... unless the "humiliation play" has been previously discussed and approved jointly.

As for two Bulls and a cow in the pen.. it's more like just two bulls often... lol

I have seen many wonderful Dom-to-Domme relationships work.. where each has their Dominant side fulfilled through others, and one or both might have a Switch or submissive side that gets play time... I admire the communication and care that it takes to make that work.

I'd only hope that this "experience" will help to set an example that can be passed along to others of the communication required before any type of "takeover" of another....

Wishing all can find the passion this lifestyle has to offer.. and in a healthy way.

MD



lorddividian -> RE: Man Handled.... (4/10/2007 3:54:15 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

Any person who takes "no" to mean anything BUT "no" before the point of spending a lot of time with them, having a lot of intimacy with them and being almost precognitive on what their response will be is just an idiot asking for trouble.


I agree with this 100% NO MEANS NO unless there is negotiation beforehand. Obviously there was not. I say this means 3 things.

1. He has no idea what hes doing
2. Hes Scared of having a woman more powerful than him present
3. Hes playing the I have a bigger dick game.

Anyay you look at it, he needs to be educated or avoided.

Your choice.



lorddividian -> RE: Man Handled.... (4/10/2007 3:57:10 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: KinkMasterDave
These are not definations i gave "no" these are definations that have been implied by subs/women. Hence it is sometimes confusing( and i get my head bit off about it on some occassions) to know what you mean by no... not all NOs mean no.


In a kinky relationship nothing should ever be "IMPLIED" if its not negotiated or talked about 1st its off limits. Any respectable Dom or sub knows this.



MDJour -> RE: Man Handled.... (4/10/2007 5:57:33 PM)

KinkMasterDave and Lorddividian, you both have valid points about the use of the word NO. And in play it is essential that this be covered. I just didn't expect to have to define the boundaries of good taste in such a public setting.

SirDominic and MsCfromMelbourne, you both have good points about the underlying powerplay. Those who know me in the local community, know that this is not my style.

I have certainly reaped the benefit of so many thoughtful and insightful comments here over the past few days.

Kindest regards, Mistress V.



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