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RE: Positive and Negative Discipline - 4/12/2007 8:17:06 AM   
Padriag


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quote:

ORIGINAL: softness

I work with children who have frightening neagitve self images, they see them selves as totally worthless, unlovable and useless.

I've dealt with several submissives who had the same problem.  Self-images of being stupid, worthless, unworthy of love, useless, dirty, etc.

The first time I encountered such a submissive I tried to deal with it through praise, telling her I thought she was pretty, nice, helpful, loveable, considerate, a good person, etc.  Although that initially appealed to her, it ultimately failed and she pushed me away as hard as she could.  The problem was what Festinger and Brehm called cognitive dissonance, in this case the stress causing difference between what she believes about herself and what her environment indicates.  In this case, she believed she was dirty, stupid, useless, and unworthy of being loved... and there I was contradicting that... the result was increasing levels of stress, the more I tried to comfort her and reinforce a positive self image through praise alone, the more the stress increased.  Eventually she couldn't take it and she pushed me away to escape the stress.

Since then I've learned that while praise is an important tool, its is also important to only use it when it is appropriate... when it has been earned.  When I now encounter a submissive with a negative self image, I work to change that image through action.  I encourage, push and if necessay force the submissive to engage in activities where they can succeed, where the negative self image is challenged by their own success.  If the submissive feels useless, I find ways for them to be useful.  If the submissive feels worthless, I find activities that build self worth.  Its not actually me reinforcing their self image, but their own successes, their own actions.  That build a very solid self worth that is not dependant on the praise of anyone else (not even me) but comes internally from their own self beliefs.

Again, in closing I'll emphasize, we learn by doing, we become by doing.

Two books you might find useful (particularly as a teacher) are
The Six Pillars of Self Esteem by Nathaniel Branden
Adlerian Counseling: A Practitioner's Approach, 4th ed.  by Thomas Sweeney, Ph.D

Edited to add some links and fix some typos

< Message edited by Padriag -- 4/12/2007 8:40:22 AM >


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A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

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RE: Positive and Negative Discipline - 4/12/2007 8:33:28 AM   
TigressFL


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quote:

My view is this... a bit of both is more effective. That is you use positive reinforcement to encourage good behavior (i.e. praise), as well as negative reinforcement (i.e. excusing the individual from some unpleasant activity). You use positive punishment (i.e. writing sentences, spanking, etc.) when the individual does something undesired, or you can use negative punishment (i.e the removal of privileges). There is also the process of extinction which requires understanding what motivated the undesired behavior, removing whatever is reinforcing that behavior so that the behavior eventually ceases. The combination of these techniques, I've personally found, is very effective in altering behavior in just about anything... from my cats to people.
quote:

ORIGINAL: Padriag



I could not have said that better myself!!! I agree completely!

Tigress~FL

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RE: Positive and Negative Discipline - 4/13/2007 12:02:20 AM   
DarkVictory


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Well, it all depends on what you're out to achieve.  Some of us are evil fucking bastards who enjoy a woman with a nice and low sense of self-esteem.  This makes us feel more like men, more powerful and potent.  Given that this is her job, to make us feel powerful and potent, (did I mention potent and powerful?) it would be imperative to make her feel small, weak, helpless, less-than, dirty, guilty, undeserving, etc.  Anything else would be too threatening to us.

Besides, everyone knows that praising someone reduces your manliness and studly-i-tude.  Naah, make her feel like shit and replace her when she's broken, that's the ticket.




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RE: Positive and Negative Discipline - 4/13/2007 3:57:12 AM   
heartfeltsub


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Am seriously hoping that this post Dark was meant to be as sarcastic as it sounds. The reason for the question is that some actually do believe or at least demonstrate through their actions their agreement with this way of being "dominant."

heartfelt

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RE: Positive and Negative Discipline - 4/13/2007 4:42:50 AM   
softness


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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkVictory

Well, it all depends on what you're out to achieve.  Some of us are evil fucking bastards who enjoy a woman with a nice and low sense of self-esteem.  This makes us feel more like men, more powerful and potent.  Given that this is her job, to make us feel powerful and potent, (did I mention potent and powerful?) it would be imperative to make her feel small, weak, helpless, less-than, dirty, guilty, undeserving, etc.  Anything else would be too threatening to us.

Besides, everyone knows that praising someone reduces your manliness and studly-i-tude.  Naah, make her feel like shit and replace her when she's broken, that's the ticket.




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RE: Positive and Negative Discipline - 4/13/2007 12:32:44 PM   
Aswad


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Depending on what you're looking for, you could pick up a book about Pavlovian conditioning in humans, as well as various books that go in-depth about training animals.

Believe it or not, what we consider being "human" is a fairly thin layer covering an intelligent ape, something that is fairly obvious in children. You can use the same kind of conditioning on a human, with some adaptations, as would work on various animals.

Since discipline, reinforcement and conditioning are aspects of behavioural regulation, you might benefit from having a look at one of the main aspects of such regulation in humans and animals: "moral" development. You might want to have a look at Kohlberg's stages of moral development. Determining which stage the subject is at can help in figuring out what kind of stimuli will give the strongest behavioural regulation. A quick summary if you'd like to avoid a lot of reading:

Stage 1: Direct negative feedback. (Avoidance)
Stage 2: Mixed positive and negative feedback. (Self-interest)
Stage 3: Social acceptance. (Pack-orientation)
Stage 4: Authority and law. (Conformity)
Stage 5: Social contract orientation. (Individuality)
Stage 6: Universal principled conscience. (Rationality)

Animals can develop to at least stage 3. Humans generally develop to somewhere in the stage 3-5 range. Very occasionally, they get to stage 6. Which stage a person is currently at, as opposed to the content of their morality, will determine what kind of feedback will be most effective in regulating their behaviour.


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RE: Positive and Negative Discipline - 4/13/2007 12:56:27 PM   
minnetar


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The positive discipline would work better on this girl as she is harder on herself than anyone else would be.

minnetar

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RE: Positive and Negative Discipline - 4/13/2007 1:39:29 PM   
LadyHugs


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Dear softness, Ladies and Gentlemen;
 
Discipline is the teaching of attitude and behavior in a social setting.
Everybody who interacts with another -- 'teaches' others how to treat them and or the situation.
 
That said, I would in general say that a Dominant uses what ever works best for their slave/submissive and, on a case by case basis.
One is not the best over another.  Some respond differently and must be dealt with differently. 
 
The fairest type of discipline is when the individuals are included into the process.  Knowing there are consequences before the need to discipline gives freedoms to the choices as well as judging their choices on consequences.  That is the lesson.  What we do effects/affects others and how that affects/effects others has consequences, such as a ripple effect.  Judgement is a learned art and so discipline is the boundry of the general art of judgment.  And, dealing with children's logic is much different then dealing with adult logic.
 
As far as the use of 'discipline' negative or positive as far as a Master-slave/Mistress-slave interaction; I work best with adults in an positive manner.  We become jaded as children of always being told 'no' or 'don't' do this or that--it is a negative.  Our world is negative and our news reflects that overkill of negative.  Positives work much better in a M/s relationship, in my mind's eyes --because, we are not 'little kids' but just need positive feed back as to learn how to see through their Dominant's mind's eyes.  Relationships should aim for a positive interaction and work hard to maintain a positive position.  Of course in all relationships there will be negative times.  However, in life's journey--I much prefer pleasant company instead of a killjoy.
 
Just some thoughts.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,

Lady Hugs

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RE: Positive and Negative Discipline - 4/13/2007 1:43:12 PM   
CdnExplorer


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A positive approach would work best on me as well. I've always been a perfectionist so I'm pretty good at beating myself up when I do something not quite right, never mind flat out wrong. If being involved in a relationship causes me to feel badly about myself I'm not going to feel like it's a situation I should stay in.

Very interesting stuff Aswad! I think I've found something new to learn about

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RE: Positive and Negative Discipline - 4/13/2007 1:54:26 PM   
gypsygrl


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quote:

Stage 1: Direct negative feedback. (Avoidance)
Stage 2: Mixed positive and negative feedback. (Self-interest)
Stage 3: Social acceptance. (Pack-orientation)
Stage 4: Authority and law. (Conformity)
Stage 5: Social contract orientation. (Individuality)
Stage 6: Universal principled conscience. (Rationality)


If you're going to look at Kohlberg's work, you might want to consider consulting Carol Gilligan's work also for both its substance, and its critique of Kohlberg.  In doing his research, Kohlberg limited his sample to men.  Gilligan found a whole different developmental process when she looked at women's moral reasoning.  Both researchers drew their sample from university students, so they're infused with a middle class bias.  Having read through the literature on moral development, I've basically decided we have no sound scientific basis for positing any general theory.  Morals are very contextual.  Of course, that's my contextualized conclusion.

Jurgen Habermas has posited a 7th stage that follows from Kohlberg's 6th: the post-conventional stage.  I always liked that.


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RE: Positive and Negative Discipline - 4/13/2007 2:00:09 PM   
LadyHugs


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Dear softness, Ladies and Gentlemen;
 
As to your comment about, deprived kids may be subjected to abuse and punishments at home, etc., and further you commented that slaves and or submissives may be a part of their normal life in a D/s or M/s relationship, that pain, humiliation, punishment and more of a daily experience of life has proffered some thoughts on this particular post response of yours. (Post #7)
 
Not all kids from deprived homes are subjected to abuse and unjust punishment at home.  We (the general sense) often are subjected to hearing the cases that do happen and I can agree, one case is one too many.  The same can be said about D/s or M/s.
 
But, we (in a general sense) are given many assumptions based on a 'class' of people and not the facts of individual people independent of class.
 
I do believe I see in my mind's eyes the slip up of the distinguishing the difference between punishment verses discipline.  In my mind's eyes there is a clear line in difference but, so easily blurred if not taken to account the difference as to refresh in the BDSM realm of the differences.  Discipline is training and though it could imply punishment--it is a sincere struggle to keep punishment in its intent to administer justice to the offense committed.  Most of those in service slave/submissive capacities avoid punishment however crave the serving disciplines to bring it to an art form.  It is self mastery, just as Dominants become disciplined in their mastery and artful application.
 
That said, there must be a voice for those who role play in their relationship where the punishment becomes a reward, as they create a situation as to cause a response from the Dominant.  Although, this is not my particular style of D/s or M/s--it still has a following and their relationship works for them.
 
Furthermore, we also have those who are really more Sadist/masochist to which D/s is loosely followed if ever.  That is a whole different series of 'behavior' and 'attitude' to which no action is punishment and a severe scene with corporal would be the highlight of their day.
 
This is why I request consideration be given to handle things on a case by case bases, as each relationship is structured on different foundations and this in its own way, creates the measure or standard of what punishment is and or is not.  In so doing, we become more flexible and willing to move to a different form of discipline if one type does not and or to borrow elements of all types of discipline to best fit the person we're teaching/training/mentoring/coaching.
 
Just some thoughts.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,

Lady Hugs

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RE: Positive and Negative Discipline - 4/13/2007 7:12:12 PM   
Aswad


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quote:

ORIGINAL: CdnExplorer

Very interesting stuff Aswad! I think I've found something new to learn about


Thanks. Remember to take Kohlberg with a few tablespoons of salt ... heck, the whole shaker, as gypsygirl pointed out. He got some of the basics down, but he's crippled by his own views.


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RE: Positive and Negative Discipline - 4/13/2007 7:24:47 PM   
Aswad


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quote:

ORIGINAL: gypsygrl

If you're going to look at Kohlberg's work, you might want to consider consulting Carol Gilligan's work also for both its substance, and its critique of Kohlberg.  In doing his research, Kohlberg limited his sample to men.  Gilligan found a whole different developmental process when she looked at women's moral reasoning.  Both researchers drew their sample from university students, so they're infused with a middle class bias.  Having read through the literature on moral development, I've basically decided we have no sound scientific basis for positing any general theory.  Morals are very contextual.  Of course, that's my contextualized conclusion.


I'm not surprised that there may be significant differences between men and women, at least beyond stage 3. And I have enough of my own critique of Kohlberg to fill a book, the foremost of which being that he did not recognize moral relativism as a valid position. But he got the general outline right, IMO, at least with regard to males, and that makes it a useful tool to me. In my observation, it holds true for non-middle-class people as well.

The literature, in general, is fairly questionable. Everyone seems to either have an agenda, or not to correct for their own biases. With suitable modifications, however, it forms a useful tool.

For me, the validation of the general outline came from analyzing how it meshes with what we know about neural nets, consciousness, mental health problems, and so forth, as well as what I know about programming (which is, believe it or not, a useful background for psychiatry). Also, the fact that the first three stages are observable in the animal kingdom helps, IMO.

quote:

Jurgen Habermas has posited a 7th stage that follows from Kohlberg's 6th: the post-conventional stage.  I always liked that.


Actually, in Kohlberg's theory, stage 5 and 6 are both post-conventional, and he did also posit a stage 7.

From my interpretations, I operate on stage 6, but in a morally relativistic worldview. My ethics are a formal system, in the math/logic sense of the word, derived from basic axioms that were chosen from a combination of my instincts, interoperability with the regular western society, and some inferrence from end-point nodes I wanted to keep from my previous stage. The system is (as any formal system) internally self-consistent, universally applied, and capable of objective discrimination of any given case (at least any case I've encountered so far).

It is also entirely unworkable for most people I've talked to, as it conflicts with very many "common sense" assumptions, often reaches non-PC or "unacceptable" conclusions, and happens to be sufficiently complicated that the last person that evaluated the interaction between three of the axioms commented "why doesn't your head explode?"... It works for me, though.

Would you care to briefly elaborate on the posited 7th stage in Habermas' theory? I'd like to hear about it, but will likely forget the reference before I have the energy to read up on it.


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RE: Positive and Negative Discipline - 4/13/2007 8:15:02 PM   
Aswad


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Aswad


Just thought I'd be self-indulgent enough to elaborate on my former post on Kohlberg's stages, with a bit of personal interpretation thrown in, although not as modified as my own model.

Pre-conventional:
Stage 1: Direct negative feedback. (Avoidance)
At this stage, behaviour is regulated by direct negative feedback, which is to say regular negative reinforcement. The subject learns that certain actions will lead to negative stimuli/consequences, and avoids these actions from a desire not to be punished or inconvenienced. Young children, whether human or animal, operate at this stage, although some adults do as well.
Stage 2: Mixed positive and negative feedback. (Self-interest)
A realization that "desired" behaviour leads to positive consequences for oneself, and of the reciprocity of interindividual relations ("you scratch my back, and I'll scratch yours") occurs. Many negatively reinforced behaviours may have been internalized as habits or mores, and behaviour becomes directed at achieving positive conditions for oneself. I think most animals reach this stage. Much of the undesireable behaviour of teens can be ascribed to the fact that they frequently operate at this stage, and that their peers are the most desired "in-group".
Stage 3: Social acceptance. (Pack-orientation)
As other needs have been met, and an awareness of the concept of society, community or "pack" arises, the desire to "belong" in a group, i.e. socialization, occurs. The subject will direct actions at achieving social acceptance in the desired circles. This also occurs in pack animals and social animals in general, IMO, although not necessarily in all individuals. Domesticated cats sometimes show clear signs of this stage, again IMO.

Conventional:
Stage 4: Authority and law. (Conformity)
When the rules of society have been internalized, although not necessarily all of them, these are seen as important for various reasons, e.g. they keep the wheels turning, they offer an illusion of safety, etc.. This stage is one of those that are common in adults. For those who do not develop past this level, it can get pretty dogmatic. This level, IMO, is common in beurocrats, many religious groups, and so forth. It is also the one stage I'm reasonably certain can be skipped in some individuals, although I've seen enough evidence to the contrary to not be certain. I at least consider it a "dead end" to remain stuck here. The main flavours, in my experience, are dogmatism-oriented and conformity-oriented, with the latter being the most prevalent in my circles. It would appear that most young adults, at least, stay here. One could possibly formulate this level as "society is the most important unit", but that would lead to implications about fascism etc being wired into the human developmental model, which some might not be comfortable with.

Post-conventional:
Stage 5: Social contract orientation. (Individuality)
The subject eventually goes on to individuate again, and realizes that rules are a means to an end only. An awareness of the validity of other opinions and viewpoints surfaces, as an artefact of recognizing that society is comprised of individuals like oneself, and has no intrinsic value apart from these individuals. The WP article posits that this is the basis for democracy, although I can't recall if Kohlberg himself made that assertion. A fair number of adults, but by no means all, reach this stage, usually late in life. IMO, a good example would be the politically-incorrect but friendly uncle/aunt/grandparent that is outspoken about things the younger adults can't / won't say due to the dogma of political correctness (stage 4; rules doesn't necessarily mean laws).
Stage 6: Universal principled conscience. (Rationality)
At this stage, values are universally applied, and morality once again transcends the individual, but in this case does not in the direction of society, but instead in the direction of an abstract ideal. Ethics are rational, and internally self-consistent. Right and wrong, in a given framework, must be objectively discernable from ethical principles. Actions are not regulated in conformity with expectations, law or any other external force, at least not insofar as doing so would violate the ethical principles; instead, every action is "right", within the given framework.


With regards to these morals, the basic idea is that an impulse, in the absence of conscious awareness and self-discipline, will be acted upon, unless it draws conscious attention to itself, for instance by being dissonant with morals or other cognitions. In the presence of such awareness and discipline, the impulses will still most likely be acted upon, although with a greater awareness and a lower acceptance of dissonance, i.e. carefully considered actions.

This is part of why people can be completely different when they are drunk, for instance, as it will take a lot stronger cognitive dissonance (or threat thereof) to call sufficient attention to an impulse that it becomes regulated. Habits may still play a great part in behaviour, but cognitive overrides that depend on this mechanism of dissonance or attention-calling will tend to fail. Of course, the extent to which people revert to their basic impulse-state will depend on the level of intoxication.

Incidentally, it is also why I tend to be more comfortable around people who are stoned or high than around people who are overtly drunk: the interference with cognition and dissonant responses is usually less for a comparable level of intoxication.

Figuring out the developmental stage a person is at can be an aid in achieving obedience and desired behaviour, as it tells you something about the stimuli the person will be the most responsive to.

At stage 1 and 2, unless you've regressed them to these levels yourself, you probably shouldn't really be playing with them in the first place, but the most effective tools will be negative and mixed feedback, respectively.

At stage 3, acceptance, belonging and a sense of one's "place" is the desired goal, and stimuli related to this will be most effective, such as approval, validation, confirmation, affection and reassurance on the positive side, with complements being available on the negative side.

At stage 4, it is necessary to get them to internalize the rules laid out, and a more systematic approach may be necessary. Formalizing things and showing that the functioning of the relationship depends on strict adherence to these rules may be a viable strategy.

At stage 5, formal rules may be harder to embed, requiring conditioning instead, while the intent can quite readily be grasped. Talking about things, explaining the intentions behind the way things work, and playing on the individual qualities may be a viable strategy.

At stage 6, you will probably have to resort to conditioning to change undesireable behaviour, which may cause developmental regression. Very few people operate on this level, however. The most viable strategy, IMO, is to utilize the cognitive flexibility and self-discipline required to implement this stage in the first place, and together plan out a way to refactor the moral framework in such a way that compliance becomes an intrinsic part of their individual moral fiber. This takes a lot of work, and a lot of time, in most cases, but will yield fairly absolute results, I'd wager. (No, I haven't conditioned or trained anyone operating at stage 6, so I can't say anything for sure, although I can make some educated guesses, supplemented by self-analysis.)

Well, sorry for being so long-winded. Hope this was interesting and/or useful to someone.

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RE: Positive and Negative Discipline - 4/13/2007 9:32:01 PM   
gypsygrl


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quote:

quote:

Jurgen Habermas has posited a 7th stage that follows from Kohlberg's 6th: the post-conventional stage.  I always liked that.


Actually, in Kohlberg's theory, stage 5 and 6 are both post-conventional, and he did also posit a stage 7.


Ok, I must have the name for the 7th stage wrong.  Its been a long time (20 years?) since I've read it, and I'm working off the top of my head, but, if I remember correctly, Habermas outlined his stages of moral development in Communication and the Evolution of Society.  I want to say that its the stage at which a person develops a meta awareness of ethics, and a critical attitude toward ethical systems in general, rather than being bound by them because it would be consistent with Habermas's basic world view.  But, I could be just making this crap up.  If such a stage hasn't been posited, someone should get around to positing it, though. 



My head exploded when i tried to unpack your ethical system.

I wrote something once where I rather passionately argued for the immorality of all ethical systems, particularly those relying on rationalist assumptions.  I don't like stage 6.  :)




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RE: Positive and Negative Discipline - 4/13/2007 10:37:28 PM   
Aswad


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quote:

ORIGINAL: gypsygrl

Ok, I must have the name for the 7th stage wrong.  Its been a long time (20 years?) since I've read it, and I'm working off the top of my head, but, if I remember correctly, Habermas outlined his stages of moral development in Communication and the Evolution of Society.


Kohlberg posited a "divine insight" type of 7th stage, which may exist if you believe in such things (I do), but which he could not find proof of. He hardly found anything to substantiate the 6th level, so going for a 7th would be more than a stretch.

It's been a while since I read some of this stuff too, so working off the top of my head as well, although I'm fairly confident the version I posted was reasonably sensible, as I've been using it in my analysis of people and the right way to respond/interact.

quote:

I want to say that its the stage at which a person develops a meta awareness of ethics, and a critical attitude toward ethical systems in general, rather than being bound by them because it would be consistent with Habermas's basic world view.  But, I could be just making this crap up.  If such a stage hasn't been posited, someone should get around to positing it, though.


A meta-awareness of ethics is intrinsic to stage 6, in my opinion. A conscious awareness certainly is. And I'm very certain that a conscious meta-awareness is involved in the moral relativist version, which is what describes me.

I'm not sure what you mean when you suggest being critical of ethical systems, although I'm assuming you mean being critical of ethical values and the validity of general models applied to ethical mechanisms of the mind. If this is the case, I certainly agree.

I've also considered eliminating ethics from the picture, and going by instinct alone, since mine are fairly positive most of the time; e.g. profound sense of empathy for all living beings. But so far I've settled for axioms that are compatible with my instincts instead, as I'm not certain re-establishing ethics will be particularly easy if working without them doesn't work out, and I've kind of been relying on that ethical framework to regulate my D/s activities etc., so I'm reluctant to risk messing that up.

quote:

My head exploded when i tried to unpack your ethical system.


And we haven't even gotten to the axioms, yet.

It can be complicated. Integrating new axioms, or removing old ones, when I feel that a change in ethics is required, can be a complicated task sometimes. Creating a new set of values from scratch would be simpler, although that would be a major change of personality.

Mostly, though, the actual day-to-day workings of it are simple enough, although some issues get complicated and have to be dealt with appropriately. As far as I'm concerned, though, those issues have always been complicated, I just haven't seen the full extent of their complexity before reaching this stage.

It's kind of like that thing about ignorance being bliss, but that you can't go back once you've been to the other side. Reality doesn't become simple by denying its complexity.

Of course, for practical reasons, I have some axioms that provide overriding principles for certain scenarios. For instance ones relating to how it is better to act suboptimally than to fail when the clock is ticking, or the ones regarding self-preservation (otherwise I'd be stuck in an infinite regression trying to determine which bacterial flora in my intestines it would be least morally reprehensible to partially kill off when choosing what to eat for the day, given that I hold all life in equal regard).

All in all, the transition takes time, but it allows flexibility if you want it, provided you have the meta-awareness in place, and once it's in place, the world truly does become a simpler place, because the gray areas disappear.

Note that I'm not saying it's better, like Kohlberg seems to imply. Just different.

quote:

I wrote something once where I rather passionately argued for the immorality of all ethical systems, particularly those relying on rationalist assumptions.  I don't like stage 6.  :)


An ethical system, if you strip it bare, is something that regulates your behaviour. Absent an ethical system, your behaviour is not regulated, and impulse prevails. Just have a look at babies; the reason why they're "innocent", is because they don't yet have an ethical system, no notion of right and wrong.

Don't confuse content with structure.

It would be more appropriate to refer to Kohlberg's model, or my simplified derivative above, as stages of behavioural regulation. The morals/ethics of things are contents, and personal. Some, like me (and apparently you) would argue that those are also subjective in their entirety.


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RE: Positive and Negative Discipline - 4/14/2007 8:33:24 AM   
gypsygrl


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quote:

Kohlberg posited a "divine insight" type of 7th stage, which may exist if you believe in such things (I do), but which he could not find proof of. He hardly found anything to substantiate the 6th level, so going for a 7th would be more than a stretch.


There's a point at which these kinds of logical systems start to get away from themselves.  As I understand it, Kohlberg's theory is supposed to have some kind of empiricle basis as he's a psychologist and not a philosopher.  But, very few people live in a world that can be regulated by conscience.  Within the system you presented, we're necessarly stuck somewhere around stage 4/5 because we're bound by the laws of the land.  Politically speaking, if our conscience doesn't conform to those laws, and we follow our conscience even when it contradicts the laws, we're in trouble.   So, we can posit post-conventional stages, but it will be very difficult to find examples using  a positivist method.  The psychologists have to hand it all back over to the philosophers as we're left with speculation as our only method.  And, history because its always possible to talk about whats already happened.

quote:

I'm not sure what you mean when you suggest being critical of ethical systems, although I'm assuming you mean being critical of ethical values and the validity of general models applied to ethical mechanisms of the mind.


I'm really bugged by the fact that I haven't a clue what Habermas' 7th stage is.  I really have no idea if that is his 7th stage.  I would have to look it up.  So, I hesitate to answer the question of what it means, because I haven't a clue where I got that idea.

But, if you look at ethics historically, different cultures have different ways of "organizing" ethical values.  Its not just that the values themselves are contingent, but the way they're put together is also contingent.  Kohlberg's system is a hiearchy organized along a vertical axis with the higher being "better" than the lower stages.  All developmental theories are organized this way.  Using what you say as an example (your conviently available), when you say somewhere in your post that a given stage isn't "better" its just "different," you're introducing a new principal of organization and refusing the hiearchy.  In doing that, you suggest an entirely different system for organizing values though the values themselves (the contents) may remain the same.   Critical doesn't necessarily mean  a negative evaluation, it just implies a reflexive awareness and ability to step out of a system in order to evaluate it.  It gets really interesting here because, in effect, the contents of the system are being deployed against its form.  Hiearchies(form) are bad because they violate our notion of fairness(content).  Thats just an example.  I could also say hiearchies are good because they preserve order.  And then, there's the reflexive moment where the two contents are compared, "fairness" and "order" and the person reflects on why one is better than the other...I'm an s, and have a need for order and security and if I have to choose would, choose a hiearchy over a more chaotic system.  But, because I understand the foundation of my choice, I can't say hiearchies are better.  They are just different.  I'm reflexively aware of having chosen.

quote:

It's kind of like that thing about ignorance being bliss, but that you can't go back once you've been to the other side. Reality doesn't become simple by denying its complexity.


Right.  I hear you on that one.  Although, it is possible to take refuge in fatalism and let the complexity take care of itself.  This doesn't involve denial so much as surrender.

quote:

An ethical system, if you strip it bare, is something that regulates your behaviour. Absent an ethical system, your behaviour is not regulated, and impulse prevails. Just have a look at babies; the reason why they're "innocent", is because they don't yet have an ethical system, no notion of right and wrong.


Interesting.  I never thought of ethics quite so concretely, but it makes sense.  Although, I would add  ethics is oriented towards interaction rather than just action.  It regulates behavior towards others but thats a rather pendantic point since all our behavior is inevitably social and oriented towards others.  But, it means that someone who is incapable of understanding how their actions intersects and combines with the actions of others would be incapable of ethical action.  Ethics, in the emphatic sense, can only really be spoken about at stages 5 and 6. (Im assuming a developmental framework here, even though I don't believe in it.  My bad.  But, I'm stuck with the vocabulary/grammar of my culture, and in order to avoid this contradiction, I would have to invent a whole new world view.  Its here we confront something like Sartre's nausea.

quote:

Don't confuse content with structure.


Ok.  I'll be careful.

quote:

It would be more appropriate to refer to Kohlberg's model, or my simplified derivative above, as stages of behavioural regulation. The morals/ethics of things are contents, and personal. Some, like me (and apparently you) would argue that those are also subjective in their entirety.


I was engrossed to see the way you used the simplified version of Kohlberg's model in matters of discipline, especially to address the question of "Positive/Negative" styles.  I agree that its necessary to be very much aware of the individual's own default system of behavioral regulation  particularly in applied matters, though I'm not, strictly speaking, a subjectivist.  If I'm a relativist, I'm a cultural relativist and tend to understand things in their social /historical context.  But, for practical purposes, the kind of subjectivism your appealing to works well enough.










_____________________________

“To be happy is to be able to become aware of oneself without fright.” ~Walter Benjamin


(in reply to Aswad)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Positive and Negative Discipline - 4/14/2007 11:02:03 PM   
Aswad


Posts: 9374
Joined: 4/4/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: gypsygrl

But, very few people live in a world that can be regulated by conscience.  Within the system you presented, we're necessarly stuck somewhere around stage 4/5 because we're bound by the laws of the land.  Politically speaking, if our conscience doesn't conform to those laws, and we follow our conscience even when it contradicts the laws, we're in trouble.


You misunderstand. Behavioural self-regulation by the moral mechanism is different from the conscious cost/benefit tradeoff. The moral mechanism regulates by causing distress/dissonance, while the tradeoff mechanism is simply an evaluation without such a factor.

And, interestingly enough, most are stuck at stages 3 and 4 for the better part of their lives. Note, though, that this is about internalized rules, not about laws. It's about what will cause the mental/emotional distress of doing something "wrong".

But, yes, acting in accordance with the closest internally self-consistent approximation of the average moral beliefs of your culture will most likely get you arrested at some point in time. Which happens all the time with some people.

This isn't exclusive to morals, though. People have all sorts of reasons for breaking the law. Moral grounds are only part of it.

Interestingly enough, the predominance of stage 3 and stage 4 can be argued as instrumental to the outcome of the Milgram experiment and later duplications of it, as well as being an important part of the mechanism behind the brutalities of WWII (nazi doctors, death camps, Nanking massacre, etc.), as they make it a moral imperative to act in such a way under certain conditions. I would posit that the people who do not comply under such experiments as that conducted by Milgram, are divided into two camps: one that refuses because of a different moral stage, and one that refuses due to profound empathy causing stronger distress than the moral imperative to comply.

Anyway, with stage 6, he is skating on thin ice, empirically speaking, but well within the bounds of what I've observed (in a less than a handful of people, which explains why the empirical grounds are shaky). With stage 7, he's skated off a cliff, and is trying to fly, or maybe waiting for angels to carry him off.

quote:

So, we can posit post-conventional stages, but it will be very difficult to find examples using  a positivist method.  The psychologists have to hand it all back over to the philosophers as we're left with speculation as our only method.  And, history because its always possible to talk about whats already happened.


I'm not a positivist. But, in any case, the post-conventional stages (5 and 6) are not that hard to find examples of. Stage 5 is readily apparent, while stage 6 requires a very large sample size to document. If one accepts my position that moral relativism is valid, and that the model can be transferred, I would claim to be an example of stage 6, although I can't claim that self-evaluation is scientifically valid.

Either way, I don't buy what he said outright, I synthesized a model based on it that I pared down in my post. And I'm more concerned with the mechanisms involved, and the associated psychological structure, than with the contents and "symptoms" of any given level.

quote:

But, if you look at ethics historically, different cultures have different ways of "organizing" ethical values.  Its not just that the values themselves are contingent, but the way they're put together is also contingent.


Certainly. Moral content is always complicated. But the parts of our brain that would be capable of dealing with anything beyond stage 3 have not had enough time to evolve to a point where the mechanisms can be particularly complicated. Ref the work being done on the basic algorithms of the neocortex, for instance.

And content certainly varies with time. I'd recommend reading What You Can't Say, by Paul Graham, as linked. You've probably thought the same things yourself, but it's an entertaining read. And one I'd recommend to many BDSM'ers.

quote:

Kohlberg's system is a hiearchy organized along a vertical axis with the higher being "better" than the lower stages.


Actually, it may be that I misunderstood him, but my understanding was that it is quite similar to any other developmental model, in being temporally organized instead. For instance, languages usually only get seperate words for blue and green at a late stage in their evolution; IIRC at least one oriental language still uses "grue like the sky" and "grue like the grass" to distinguish them.

There is no value judgement inherent, the way I read it. Which is odd, since he is a moral absolutist, and thus would presumably judge the content as being more important than the organization.

I certainly don't put a value judgement in it myself. It's quite simple: at any point you are faced with a challenge that requires more abstraction to solve it, you start the process of migrating to a higher level of abstraction. Which is, again, not a judgement of "quality". Also, he claims it is not possible to "skip" a level, and I'd tend to agree with him, from a basis that the human brain usually resorts to local algorithms, and those tend to find local minima, not global minima.

Basically, in the face of dissonance, you either resolve the dissonance, sustain mental health injuries, or become desensitized to the stimuli that caused the dissonance.

quote:

Using what you say as an example (your conviently available), when you say somewhere in your post that a given stage isn't "better" its just "different," you're introducing a new principal of organization and refusing the hiearchy.


Again, it may be that I'm biased in the direction of assuming good faith, but I think this is what he meant, too, although I suspect many who do not think this way may have been making specific assumptions about this. When all you have is a hammer, anything will look like a nail, etc...

But, yeah, I guess a clearer way of getting it across is to say that there are several different processes leading to a development that is lumped into a single model due to people not being sufficiently aware of the processes. Some candidate processes are avoidance - habituation - social integration - individuation, habit - form - meaning - awareness - meta-awareness, and so forth.

I have never met anyone that I evaluated as operating at stage 6 that did not also have some form of meta-ethics awareness, although it does perhaps seem like Kohlberg isn't quite implying that this is a requisite. In that sense, one might posit meta awareness as a 7th stage, and it might be the case that formal logic is an 8th stage, or both of these could be branches off the main tree at some point.

But such complexity goes beyond the scope of the thread, so you might want to take it to PM or a different thread (and alerting me by PM), unless everyone else is amused as well. It would perhaps be interesting to "dissect" the moral mechanics of people at the other stages as well, for purposes of more generally answering the OP. What I've said in my posts can be applied to disciplining a stage 6 person, but not all of it can be generalized to every stage.

I was only trying to give some pointers about using the most effective behavioural regulation mechanisms to achieve the desired behaviour from one's sub/slave; morals cause distress / dissonance when tested or violated, and so are fairly ideal in obtaining obedience and conditioned behaviour.

Reflexive and stimulus-response conditioning are different matters, of course.

quote:

Critical doesn't necessarily mean  a negative evaluation, it just implies a reflexive awareness and ability to step out of a system in order to evaluate it.  It gets really interesting here because, in effect, the contents of the system are being deployed against its form.


Stepping outside a system to evaluate it is operating in a different frame of reference, which is chosen as part of the evaluation. This may be an empty frame of reference, an approximation of a different system, or whatever. The mechanism doesn't go away fast enough for it to be viable to "disconnect" it for purposes of introspection, so instead the system is externalized and viewed in another frame of reference. I use this if I want to change anything, or need to check for a formal error (I'm only human).

Without a frame of reference, you cannot operate on it. Just like light and dark are both needed for "brightness" or "darkness" to have any meaning. Contrast.

And, yes, I guess you could say this is using a mechanism on itself.

Basically, there's a certain bit of a limbo here. My morals are stable, they do not drift, and the only changes in my moral judgements, within a given set of axioms, come about as I get more information about the case under consideration, or if I've only made a partial evaluation (which is never the case for actions, but  may be the case for discussions in some instances).

But at the same time, they are entirely changeable, although it takes a bit of time to integrate, and then a bit of time for things to settle. I can certainly understand how moral absolutism might be a "comfortable" alternative; it does not cause distress for me, as I don't need that "rock" to hold on to, but I can certainly see it causing distress for many.

quote:

Right.  I hear you on that one.  Although, it is possible to take refuge in fatalism and let the complexity take care of itself.  This doesn't involve denial so much as surrender.


In my experience, attempting this didn't do me any good when I did (can you say 'anarcho-nihilism-gone-worse'?), and I really owe turning out as "well" as I did to a history teacher (I hated the subject at the time, until I got him, and I was amazed at the way he used his mind) and to my nephandi (I progressed from 4 to 6 over the years with her, as a result of the conflict between wanting to be a couple and having strong views on things, as well as learning to see good in humanity, not just bad).

quote:

Interesting.  I never thought of ethics quite so concretely, but it makes sense.


Part of assimilating information, for me, is organizing it quickly into a whole, rereading to get the parts and interconnections, and then refactoring into orthogonal units and storing these. As an unfortunate side-effect, self-contradictory units tend to get lost along the way, along with those that contradict other units from the same source.

This is why I am pedantic about language, I guess. When the terms are precise, it is a lot simpler to identify the orthogonal units and their interconnections/interactions. Many small building blocks will offer more possible configurations than a few large ones.

quote:

Although, I would add  ethics is oriented towards interaction rather than just action.


I disagree. It's oriented towards cognition. Or, more precisely, mental process, not just the conscious parts.

quote:

It regulates behavior towards others but thats a rather pendantic point since all our behavior is inevitably social and oriented towards others.


That's more of a social construct, or perhaps a social view of it. There are several of my axioms that regulate my behaviour in the absence of ohters, or even with regard to myself, and these function in the same way.

quote:

But, it means that someone who is incapable of understanding how their actions intersects and combines with the actions of others would be incapable of ethical action.


No. Or, rather, not in the sense of "ethics = behavioural self-regulation", and not in the sense of "ethics = values and reasoning based on them". I've seen examples of people being absent either while not being absent the other.

The question is more one of their progression being "wrong", or lack of the drives and motives that would lead to "regular" ethics. For instance, if you don't see the cause and effect relationship due to abusive parents, progressing beyond the pre-conventional stages may be difficult; subtract about one sigma empathy, and you've got a prime candidate for a sociopath. Absence of social integration (like I experienced) can do quite interesting things at stage 3, with interesting consequences for what is internalized when transitioning to stage 4, but doesn't necessarily preclude hitting stage 3. Absence of the desire for social contact might, though. And so forth.

quote:

Ethics, in the emphatic sense, can only really be spoken about at stages 5 and 6. (Im assuming a developmental framework here, even though I don't believe in it.  My bad.


Empathy can act at any stage, IMO. I can remember feelings of empathy from ages at which I was operating at a pre-conventional stage, in contexts that have been verified as actual and accurately remembered events by parents etc... Even before I went for the "all life is equal" axiom, I had trouble swatting a wasp that had stung me, emotionally.

But, yes, empathy varies in strength between individuals, and levels 3 and 4 do not leave a whole lot of room for empathy to dominate dissonance, which brings us back to WWII, mass behaviour, bumfighting, etc... The pack instinct is strong in humans; empathy can  be, but this doesn't appear to be common, nor covariable with moral development.

quote:

But, I'm stuck with the vocabulary/grammar of my culture, and in order to avoid this contradiction, I would have to invent a whole new world view.


I do this all the time. It's part of my job sometimes.

quote:

Its here we confront something like Sartre's nausea.


Not familiar with that term. Care to explain?

quote:

I was engrossed to see the way you used the simplified version of Kohlberg's model in matters of discipline, especially to address the question of "Positive/Negative" styles.


I had to look up "engrossed", as English is not my native language, but if I understood the term correctly, this is a compliment. In which case, thank you.

quote:

I agree that its necessary to be very much aware of the individual's own default system of behavioral regulation  particularly in applied matters, though I'm not, strictly speaking, a subjectivist.  If I'm a relativist, I'm a cultural relativist and tend to understand things in their social /historical context.  But, for practical purposes, the kind of subjectivism your appealing to works well enough.


I'm just arguing that knowing the structure is fundamentally important to altering the content, and that embedding conditioning into a person's morals will be a very effective way to achieve the desired behaviour; also, this knowledge also provides more info on the stimuli a person will be receptive to learning from.

Awareness of preexisting content is also useful, of course, but may take more time to identify than the structure, particularly if you want to identify all of it.

Regards,
Aswad.

(in reply to gypsygrl)
Profile   Post #: 38
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