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messaging rudeness - 4/22/2005 8:26:50 PM

Bri4fun

Posts: 6
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

I have heard this from many of the people both Dom and sub on this site. How difficult it is to gain any form of response. I tried it out...as others have...and sent a few well thought out and polite msgs. Only to discover it IS difficult to get a response as normal politeness would dictate. In my experience I've even responded to submales even though my interests clearly do not fall in that direction...since they were polite, they deserved a response to let them know I did read it and it is not "my cup of tea".
Everyone here should think about rudeness and that it is rude to not tender a response to someone who approaches you politely. Particularly when you can obviously see they spent time and effort to write you. I learned enough with that to not bother wasting time sending msgs. Would you deliberately and obviously ignore someone in the "real world" who spoke to you and addressed you with respect and politeness?

Post #: 1

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/22/2005 8:38:35 PM

FangsNfeet

Posts: 3758
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Bri4fun

quote:

Would you deliberately and obviously ignore someone in the "real world" who spoke to you and addressed you with respect and politeness?

I've done it before and I'm most likely to do it again. So save the Drama for your Mama and allow us to have our freedom to speak or not to speak.

Politely Suggested,

FnF

_____________________________

I'm Godzilla and you're Japan

(in reply to Bri4fun)

Post #: 2

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/22/2005 8:43:19 PM

siamsa24

Posts: 2426
Joined: 2/2/2004
Status: offline

I'm sorry, but this has been discussed TO DEATH. Here are some links to a few of the threads:

Manners

Why is politeness and respect such a big deal in BDSM?

Showing Respect

Rude and offensive e-mails

Deleted unread

Being Rude

RUDE submissives

That's not all of them, but I am tired of pulling.

I have so much respect for you Proudsub, I really don't know how you do it

(in reply to Bri4fun)

Post #: 3

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/22/2005 9:02:20 PM

ellegantsub

Posts: 2
Joined: 2/10/2005
Status: offline

How about the people who message RUDE statments?!? Hey, if you aren't into something or have a prejudust why would you send a hatefull message to a person who has made no contact with you! I could not believe this person would find the time to insult me for no reason. Sad person who finds that thrilling.

(in reply to Bri4fun)

Post #: 4

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/22/2005 9:06:54 PM

siamsa24

Posts: 2426
Joined: 2/2/2004
Status: offline

There are links discussing that issue in the above post as well.

(in reply to ellegantsub)

Post #: 5

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/22/2005 11:11:02 PM

SirKenin

Posts: 2994
Joined: 10/31/2004
From: Barrie, ON Canada
Status: offline

Blah. It was the Scorpions that said "over and over and over".

_____________________________

Hi. I don't care. Thanks.

Wicca: Pretending to be an ancient religion since 1956

Catholic Church: Serving up guilt since 107 AD.

(in reply to siamsa24)

Post #: 6

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/23/2005 1:04:25 AM

Jacen

Posts: 30
Joined: 9/24/2004
Status: offline

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results

(in reply to SirKenin)

Post #: 7

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/23/2005 10:26:39 AM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jacen

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results

heh. Or the sign of someone who just read Hume.

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

(in reply to Jacen)

Post #: 8

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/23/2005 10:48:43 AM

siamsa24

Posts: 2426
Joined: 2/2/2004
Status: offline

LOL *claps hands* I got the reference! That just made my day

(in reply to perverseangelic)

Post #: 9

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/23/2005 11:37:44 AM

onceburned

Posts: 2117
Joined: 1/4/2005
From: Iowa
Status: offline

quote:

Would you deliberately and obviously ignore someone in the "real world" who spoke to you and addressed you with respect and politeness?

Of course not, but email is not the same thing as 'in person'. Otherwise it would be as if every woman here was surrounded by a throng of men, all talking at the same time trying to get her attention. The polite thing to do would be to systematically talk to each person in turn (while still more men arrive) ... but its a heavy burden to expect of someone.

I understand the frustration of trying to get the attention of women here. May I suggest that you establish some 'name recognition' by posting more frequently to the message boards? I think you will find that this will help, especially if you develop a good reputation.

(in reply to Bri4fun)

Post #: 10

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/23/2005 11:40:28 AM

siamsa24

Posts: 2426
Joined: 2/2/2004
Status: offline

quote:

May I suggest that you establish some 'name recognition' by posting more frequently to the message boards? I think you will find that this will help, especially if you develop a good reputation.

Believe me, this helps. I tend to read email from names I recognize first

(in reply to onceburned)

Post #: 11

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/23/2005 1:04:18 PM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: siamsa24

LOL *claps hands* I got the reference! That just made my day

:) Yay! I'm writing an exam today, I'm glad I was able to make someone happy :)

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

(in reply to siamsa24)

Post #: 12

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/24/2005 12:00:08 PM

temptation

Posts: 111
Joined: 2/20/2004
From: heaven
Status: offline

at least you dont get shit like this;

"nice pictures, all fake and a very stupid profile. why do you men even bother doign this shit. go play with your self "

it happens every once in a while.

(in reply to perverseangelic)

Post #: 13

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/24/2005 12:11:24 PM

siamsa24

Posts: 2426
Joined: 2/2/2004
Status: offline

I think I may have gotten one from either the same person or someone who thinks the same "those pics dont even look like the same person nice try "sir""

(in reply to temptation)

Post #: 14

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/24/2005 1:15:56 PM

masterstrict

Posts: 3
Joined: 10/17/2004
Status: offline

i am a firm beliver in treating people as they deserve , so do as you would be done to , the main thing we all have is the ability to just treat with the contempt they deserve

(in reply to Bri4fun)

Post #: 15

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/24/2005 2:00:55 PM

darkinshadows

Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline

What I do not respond to -

'Hi'
'up 4 a chat?'
'r u busy'
'whats wiv da plumage'
'will you save me or corrupt me?'

any mail (even plesent ones) including the words -

'on yer knees'
'little one'
'vanilla'
'bitch'
'girl'
'gift'
'true'
'real'

Any mail that talks solely about what a person is and wants.

Any mail that looks like a piece of spam (the repeatable kind not the pink stuff).

I do reply however to a well thought out mail that shows that the person writing has read my profile and has taken a note of my interests.

I also reply to mails that are sent with kind words about my profile.

And genuine questions.

Peace and Love

_____________________________

.dark.

...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to Bri4fun)

Post #: 16

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/24/2005 2:35:13 PM

DreamWeaverAz

Posts: 38
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: dark~angel

What I do not respond to -

'Hi'
'up 4 a chat?'
'r u busy'
'whats wiv da plumage'
'will you save me or corrupt me?'

any mail (even plesent ones) including the words -

'on yer knees'
'little one'
'vanilla'
'bitch'
'girl'
'gift'
'true'
'real'

Any mail that talks solely about what a person is and wants.

Any mail that looks like a piece of spam (the repeatable kind not the pink stuff).

Peace and Love

well there go all My words of wit and wisDom...*grins* oh and btw...

will that lovely plumage be My salvation or corrupt Me, will it take Me deeper into vanilla or will your gift be a pet that is true and real?

*ducks and grins*...heheheh

Luvs ya back D

_____________________________

Honor and Trust and Respect before anything other

(in reply to darkinshadows)

Post #: 17

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/24/2005 7:37:06 PM

PenelopePitstop

Posts: 254
Joined: 4/22/2005
From: UK
Status: offline

That last message by dark angel has a very pleasing lampshade/tree shape, I'm noticing.

This is what I won't respond to. I've just had it:

U hot. Want 2 talk? Got cam?

And this one person who, bless him, has just put so much effort into all five of his posts, but COMPLETELY ignores my requests to tone it down, and refuses to accept that I won't be phoning him.

_____________________________

Wickedness is a myth created by good people to account for the curious attractiveness of others ~ Oscar Wilde

"You had me at Goodbye"

(in reply to DreamWeaverAz)

Post #: 18

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/25/2005 1:05:32 PM

Bri4fun

Posts: 6
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

"So save the Drama for your Mama..."

You can say "respectfully submitted" all you like...you meant to be annoying and insulting. My recently widowed "mama" is not someone you should be using in your infantile and insulting manerisms. THIS is one of the very reasons I do not post much. Too many like this one. Normally I don't respond to children, but I'll make an exception in your case.
Also, if people acted honorably and treated others so UNTIL someone proved they didn't deserve it, being online would be a much more positive experience for everyone.
When those of you who pretend others aren't real people (even online) realize rudeness is rudneness on the Internet or in the "real world", more enjoyment would be gleened by all when they were online.
And I'm sorry to bore those of you who may have seen this before, if you didn't like it why not just ignore it?
I DO thank those of you who were more constructive, though.
Well, you "regulars" who live and die by these msg boards and chats have a good time. Most days I have better things to do than vicariously live life on a machine.

(in reply to PenelopePitstop)

Post #: 19

RE: messaging rudeness - 4/25/2005 1:11:49 PM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline

Oooo. I got a -great- one today.

The person wrote to me fairly politely, but addressed me as "girl."

I responded politely to the message, and added at then end that while I very much appreciated being written to, I'd prefer not to be addressed by diminuatives.

The respones? "whatever loser"

I responded again, to say that I hadn't intended to offend, and that my partner prefers I not be called diminuatives.

I doubt she'll write back.

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

(in reply to Bri4fun)

Post #: 20

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