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first encounter - 4/19/2007 12:27:14 AM   
piercedallover


Posts: 1
Joined: 1/15/2007
Status: offline 		had my first time ever session with a Dom a few weeks ago. is it normal to have severe impact play and intercourse on the first visit?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: first encounter - 4/19/2007 12:51:10 AM   
WilliamTheSlave


Posts: 4
Joined: 3/26/2007
Status: offline 		My first session was of a similar intensity.

Why are you asking this question? Is this your only doubt or are there other doubts you have about your Dom?

(in reply to piercedallover)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: first encounter - 4/19/2007 1:06:08 AM   
hisannabelle


Posts: 1992
Joined: 12/3/2006
From: Tallahassee, FL, USA
Status: offline 		greetings pierced,

depends. for me, i doubt i would do that the first time i met someone; then again, it would depend on how i met the person and how much we'd communicated before the meeting, as well.

as long as you are both comfortable with it, there's no right or wrong way to go about things. there are lots of people who like to wait before playing/having sex, and lots of people who are comfortable doing it at first. if you are having doubts, then that's something to communicate to the dom you are talking to, and if you feel that he isn't respecting your comfort level, then i would definitely rethink things. but overall if you are happy with it, normal/not normal doesn't really matter.

hope you are well.
annabelle.


_____________________________

a'ishah (the artist formerly known as annabelle)
i have the kind of beauty that moves...

(in reply to WilliamTheSlave)
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RE: first encounter - 4/19/2007 1:11:08 AM   
captainblack


Posts: 146
Joined: 8/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: piercedallover

had my first time ever session with a Dom a few weeks ago. is it normal to have severe impact play and intercourse on the first visit?


Normal for one is not normal for another. I have had that sort of interaction on the day of a first
meeting sometimes. Other times it was not until much latter. It depends on how things work
out between the two of you.

Always have a first meeting in a public place. This provides saftey for both parties
and allows you to each walk away if there is a feeling something is wrong.

CB

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(in reply to piercedallover)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: first encounter - 4/19/2007 2:58:56 AM   
heartfeltsub


Posts: 1641
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline 		It depends on what was agreed to. i play with a person who has very sadistic tendencies and while i thought my first private sessions with Him (which did include sex) was a bit heavy, it was in keeping with what i had told Him about myself. W/we had also played in public before and those sessions were milder. Also it was a time of both of U/us learning what i could and couldn't take.

i don't know if this happened with you, but some of my submissive friends, especially those who are new in the lifestyle say they are masochists when they haven't felt the first whip stroke or cane, and the Dom/Top who is playing with them takes them at their word. That is why when i was looking i always said that i was a wimp and not good with pain play, so that play starts at a less intensive level.

heartfelt

(in reply to captainblack)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: first encounter - 4/19/2007 7:14:12 AM   
HutchGarahl


Posts: 562
Joined: 1/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: piercedallover
had my first time ever session with a Dom a few weeks ago. is it normal to have severe impact play and intercourse on the first visit?


Depends...was something like this discussed ahead of time....were you comfortable during the session....how do you feel about it now that it's done? For some people, a high impact play and sex scene would be normal on a first...for others, it may not be something expected, but happen anyways leaving one feeling a bit odd. I would suggest however, if your feeling a bit odd and uncomfortable with what happend...you need to discuss it with the dom.

(in reply to piercedallover)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: first encounter - 4/19/2007 7:18:18 AM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		you sound as thought you did not handle the first stage of negotiations very well....remember you have all the power in any situation until you give it away...

_____________________________


Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."




(in reply to heartfeltsub)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: first encounter - 4/19/2007 7:23:58 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: piercedallover
had my first time ever session with a Dom a few weeks ago. is it normal to have severe impact play and intercourse on the first visit?

It's not uncommon.

But who cares- what matters is whether you knew what you were getting into, felt comfortable and fulfilled by the experience, and feel more secure afterwards?

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to piercedallover)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: first encounter - 4/19/2007 9:23:40 AM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		as long as you felt ok about it then it was probley fine.  As for normal i guess it depends on  what you see as normal.  As for me i would not do that on a first meet that is what is normal for me.  For you it may be different.  As long as you are ok with it i would not worry about labeling it normal or abnormal.   It is what it is.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: first encounter - 4/19/2007 3:13:44 PM   
slaveish


Posts: 1086
Joined: 2/19/2007
Status: offline 		Severe impact play, to me, is something to reserve just because of the level of intimacy it takes for me to feel comfortable with it. I'm not saying it's wrong to do it on the first meet, nor is it wrong to have sex on the first meet.

It is like Buddha said. We humans set the parameters of "right" and "wrong" but in the universe, "right" and "wrong" do not exist.

_____________________________

You only lose what you cling to. ~~Gautama Sidharta

If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other. ~~Mother Teresa

(in reply to littleone35)
Profile   Post #: 10
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