RE: Doms approaching submissive females and lying about what they want from them?

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RE: Doms approaching submissive females and lying about... - 4/20/2007 9:36:03 PM

Sweetbluerose

Posts: 54
Joined: 9/24/2005
Status: offline

Curvyslavegirl,

Your right as are the rest, and indeed, i did feel it was a red flag when they asked for pictures, but the one was about 1000 miles from me, so i kind of understood how he felt about booking a flight and flying down to meet a woman...but bottomline i did feel "wrong" doing it and should have listened to my instincts.
i let the fact that it has been a long time for me, and my desire for a Dom, lead me into situations that good sense should have warned me about.
Thank all of You for Your kind answers....

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Post #: 21

RE: Doms approaching submissive females and lying about... - 4/21/2007 3:44:19 AM

TheDiva

Posts: 129
Joined: 6/21/2006
From: Tallahassee, FL
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: outlier
...

I have been contacted by submissives who said things like:
"What would you do to me?". When I said "First get to
know you better."
...

I get the message or its equivalent with some frequency. That's the perfect answer; I'd think someone's first message should be an introduction, not a poll.

(in reply to outlier)

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Post #: 22

RE: Doms approaching submissive females and lying about... - 4/21/2007 8:19:23 AM

serillabound

Posts: 22
Joined: 12/12/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sweetbluerose

I wonder if I am the only woman on here, that has the bad luck to find Doms/Masters who say they want ltr or rt play. But, who really want someone to send them nude pictures, some erotic writings, and/or phone sex. It may be that I am just incrediably gulible and naive.
I find that everything is great as long as I do as they say, but the minute I ask a casual question about their availability for calls or instant messages, or when we are going to meet for real, the communication stops abruptly?
Is it because these questions aren't submissive? Or that they are lying about being available to play real time, or they are just looking for nonreal gratification?

IMO they want to perv on the internet, and are probably married or otherwise committed. Don't waste your time.

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Post #: 23

RE: Doms approaching submissive females and lying about... - 4/21/2007 2:41:27 PM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: texancutie

You have every right to ask questions, and you also don't owe them anything. Who is to say these men are even really what they claim to be? You are assuming just because a guy you meet online, tells you he is an experienced Dominant or Master, that he really is.

Try reading the BDSM acid test. You can google it. It's good reading for newbies, and may help you weed out the unwanted. Just be thankful that kind of guy ended up disappearing on you, and you never had the chance to meet them, or get deeply emotionally involved real time.

I am reading this acid test and some of the information on it seems rather much. I was wondering how they determine fakeness of realness of a dominant? Who came up with these numbers?

quote:

Various estimates and surveys have placed the ratio of true (i.e., natural) male sexual Dominants to female sexual submissives at about one to ten. However, a quick count in any given D/s oriented chat room would lead you to believe that male Doms outnumber the subs at about two to one. Now if there is actually only one male Dom for every ten female subs, that means that 19 out of the 20 "Doms" you see online HAVE TO BE FAKES. Keep this in mind. There is a 95% chance that any man you talk to online claiming to be a Dom is no such thing. This leads us to our first rule, a rule that all statisticians and scientists already know by heart: "When in doubt, throw it out!" Your search for a suitable Dominant partner (especially if you are seeking a serious long term relationship as well) could easily take years. That's hardly surprising, most people spend years looking for that special lover, be they 'vanilla' or otherwise. So don't be disheartened by all these drastic ratios. BUT DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME either. If any of the prospects you are chatting with online makes you feel uncomfortable for any reason, drop him. Don't give him 'three strikes' or 'extra chances to win.' Block out his screen-name and move on. There was only a one in twenty chance he was legitimate anyway. Trust your instincts!

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Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to texancutie)

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Post #: 24

RE: Doms approaching submissive females and lying about... - 4/21/2007 6:31:07 PM

arayofsunshine55

Posts: 545
Joined: 8/1/2004
From: San Francisco, CA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sweetbluerose

I wonder if I am the only woman on here, that has the bad luck to find Doms/Masters who say they want ltr or rt play. But, who really want someone to send them nude pictures, some erotic writings, and/or phone sex. It may be that I am just incrediably gulible and naive.
I find that everything is great as long as I do as they say, but the minute I ask a casual question about their availability for calls or instant messages, or when we are going to meet for real, the communication stops abruptly?

I think you are being very gullible and naive. You interact with an unseen unknown stranger with nudie pics and erotic stories and you are giving him wank fodder. Nothing wrong with that in my book but it seems he's being pretty upfront about his desires. Hell I put up pics and write blogs for the specific purpose of giving the gals and blokes a bit of wank fodder. But I don't mistake them for anything else. And they don't even have to interact with me to wank. It's a public service from a non-service oriented gal

.

Figure out what works for you. So although I may post pics for the purpose of wank fodder, I don't email nude pics. I don't get into loads of sex talk. I push to meet asap. Works for me, the pure wankers who actually approach me have to work much harder than they like if we are really focused on different things. This type really does announce himself from 3 miles away. Learn to read the signs. Or enjoy. That is also a choice you can make. Enjoy them for what they are, titillating. Cause us gals like to wank as well.

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Is it not most transformative, most earthshaking, to pierce the veils of self-deception and illusion, and crack the eggshell of ignorance, to most intimately encounter oneself? Lama Surya Das

(in reply to Sweetbluerose)

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Post #: 25

RE: Doms approaching submissive females and lying about... - 4/21/2007 6:41:20 PM

unsung

Posts: 183
Joined: 12/23/2006
Status: offline

No you are not the only one to be approached by men with immediate expectations for sexual gratification; it seems to happen more frequently than being approached by a well mannered, and genuinely interested and interesting d-type.

(in reply to Sweetbluerose)

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Post #: 26

RE: Doms approaching submissive females and lying about... - 4/21/2007 11:59:38 PM

outlier

Posts: 1111
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheDiva

quote:

ORIGINAL: outlier
...

I have been contacted by submissives who said things like:
"What would you do to me?". When I said "First get to
know you better."
...

I get the message or its equivalent with some frequency. That's the perfect answer; I'd think someone's first message should be an introduction, not a poll.

Thank you TheDiva. It is always nice to have one's actions confirmed.
And I would bet a sizable sum that with the picture you have got
posted you have to deal with A LOT more email than I do.

Outlier

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Worth the time, the thought - or rather, the thoughtfulness - and, often,
the waiting." Pete Seeger

(in reply to TheDiva)

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Post #: 27

RE: Doms approaching submissive females and lying about... - 4/22/2007 12:22:33 AM

pagansub77

Posts: 137
Joined: 3/5/2005
Status: offline

Well, I actually find I'm less offended if they come right out and say "hey, look, I live 2000 miles away, the chance we will ever meet is slim to none but I like your pics and would love to see more." Kind of like the wino who asks for money for a bottle. He's not blowing sunshine up your skirts, he's being honest. He's also more likely to get a buck from me.
YMMV

ps77

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ps77

In the end everything will be okay.
If everything is not okay, then it's not the end.
Madness takes its toll...exact change only

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RE: Doms approaching submissive females and lying about... - 4/22/2007 12:45:57 AM

Denny17

Posts: 86
Joined: 11/5/2006
Status: offline

true enough doms do that to get some pussy. can you blame them when they aint marketable or smart enough, it aint easy getting pussy or pussy pictures in vanillaville as in here i imagine but its not right.

(in reply to Sweetbluerose)

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Post #: 29