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What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 8:21:45 AM

puella

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It's not yet noon on Saturday and I am more random than usual.

Has anyone out there actually had someone who was in love with them? And I mean this totally disassociated from your being in love with that person (necessarily).

What was it like? How did you know it? What did it mean for you?....

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We must move forward, not backward, upward, not forward, and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom...... The Simpsons

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography." ...Ambrose Bierce

"Don't you oppress me!"....Stan/Loretta

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RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 8:29:02 AM

farglebargle

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Finding the bunny being boiled on the stove is usually a good sign.

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ברוך אתה, אדוני אלוקינו, ריבון העולמים, מי יוצר צמחים ריחניים

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RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 8:31:18 AM

puella

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I am not really aiming as sarcasm, fargle. I do not usually allow myself to get this exposed in a question. I honestly was just hoping for people who know to explain it to those of us who do not.

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We must move forward, not backward, upward, not forward, and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom...... The Simpsons

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography." ...Ambrose Bierce

"Don't you oppress me!"....Stan/Loretta

(in reply to farglebargle)

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RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 8:32:28 AM

domiguy

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Oh my little Puella, why do you ask such questions? Haven't you ever been in love with someone? Or had someone love you?

I think we possibly dive in way to fast when using the term "love." It kind of sucks as you get a little older and a touch more jaded that sometimes the word itself starts to lose meaning when applied to the times.....We have become way to transient....It's sometimes is difficult when someone says they love you after spending a short amount of time together...I always think they are simply speaking to the Domidong...."Hello...I'm up here!!!"....lol....I'm just a piece of meat to you whores.

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RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 8:35:37 AM

farglebargle

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quote:

ORIGINAL: puella

I am not really aiming as sarcasm, fargle. I do not usually allow myself to get this exposed in a question. I honestly was just hoping for people who know to explain it to those of us who do not.

Sorry, I exhibit poor impulse control. I can never resist the pop-culture reference.

_____________________________

It's not every generation that gets to watch a civilization fall. Looks like we're in for a hell of a show.

ברוך אתה, אדוני אלוקינו, ריבון העולמים, מי יוצר צמחים ריחניים

(in reply to puella)

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RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 8:36:48 AM

puella

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No problem, doll... it's a highly out of charecter post for me , as well.

_____________________________

We must move forward, not backward, upward, not forward, and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom...... The Simpsons

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography." ...Ambrose Bierce

"Don't you oppress me!"....Stan/Loretta

(in reply to farglebargle)

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RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 8:38:12 AM

LustyVampInMn

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i knew it was love when he walked in the snow to the store because a very pregnant me NEEDED breyers choco chip ice cream. i knew it was love when i was sick and he held my hair back for me and then cleaned up after me- never complaining.. i knew it was love when he rubbed my ass til i fell asleep..then, there are the small things- the touch of his hand on my shoulder, a call in the middle of the day to see how i'm doing.. love is wonderful- the best high in the world.

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RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 8:40:27 AM

imthatacheyouhav

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its very awkward when that happens. i normally tell them that they are a very nice...wonderful person, but i just dont love them like that....or depending on the circumstance i'll just have to not see them any more.....i wish you well in dealing with this and i completely empathize.

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RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 8:53:23 AM

marieToo

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This is strange timing as I was just talking to a girlfriend last night about my ex husband. He was in love with me. And it never lessened over the years. Always wanting to kiss me when he got home from work. Still wanting to hold hands after some 22 years. Wanting to snuggle with me and fall asleep in each other's arms. For over 2 decades I couldn't breathe. It was a love that strangled, smothered, destroyed and killed. Life without him has been like rebirth---like there is space now in which I can move. I don't want someone to love me like that ever again. On the other hand, it has alot to do with the way I'm built. I'm simply not cut out for that type of relationship.

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RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 9:02:26 AM

gypsygrl

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Smother love, yes. I can certainly understand that feeling. I need a lot of 'space' and get really uncomfortable if someone is too overwhelming in their shows of affection. My ex-husband wasn't very affectionate, but he was certainly a hoverer and that drives me crazy too.

A couple times guys have fallen for me and I couldn't reciprocate in the same way and I always felt guilty about it. After a while it started to feel like an unwelcome control move and a manipulation.

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“To be happy is to be able to become aware of oneself without fright.” ~Walter Benjamin

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RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 9:10:01 AM

puella

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Helo Domi,

I don't know why I ask such questions, I guess it is what makes me so frustrating.

Yes, I have loved profoundly. I have seen others love and live together in love, but no, no one has ever been in love with me. I just thought it might be interesting to hear others speak about what it was like to know and feel what it meant to have someone in love with you.

Thanks.

_____________________________

We must move forward, not backward, upward, not forward, and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom...... The Simpsons

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography." ...Ambrose Bierce

"Don't you oppress me!"....Stan/Loretta

(in reply to domiguy)

Post #: 11

RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 9:17:24 AM

gypsygrl

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From: new york state
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Ok, I think I misunderstood your question.

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“To be happy is to be able to become aware of oneself without fright.” ~Walter Benjamin

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RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 9:21:34 AM

SirDominic

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quote:

ORIGINAL: puella
Has anyone out there actually had someone who was in love with them? And I mean this totally disassociated from your being in love with that person (necessarily).

What was it like? How did you know it? What did it mean for you?....

If I understand what you are asking, here is one story:

At one time I ran my own small business and hired a young woman (early 20's). She was extremely shy, uncomfortable with herself. She had a serious case of rosacea all over her face. I treated her simply as another human being. We ended up having a lot of interests in common and could talk for long periods of time.

She had never had any man show any interest in her, and to have one do so without any sexual overtones, well it hit her pretty hard. She fell for me big time, and for awhile had fantasies about us being together. For awhile, she would come in on her days off wearing verrrrry sexy clothing. My response was to pretend not to notice it at all. It became sort of a game where she dressed more and more provocative, trying to get a reaction out of me, and the more she went over the top, the more I completely ignored it.

If I would have ever made a pass at her, she would have quit on the spot. So in a way she was being a tease. I think that she just enjoyed the game, and she could enjoy it because she knew I wouldn't ever make that pass.

It was very charming. In the ten years she worked for me, she did a lot of maturing. We are still very good friends to this day.

Namaste, Sir Dominic

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You teach best what you have lived.

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RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 9:30:21 AM

domiguy

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Maybe someone would love you if your tits were bigger or you started eating pussy.....I understand these qualities to be love enhancers.....I love you.

Edited to add:....Of course only if you get bigger tits or begin dining at the "Y."

< Message edited by domiguy -- 4/28/2007 10:05:30 AM >

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RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 9:36:56 AM

Donnalee

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Whether I want to receive the love offered makes a difference in how it feels to me. I have been loved by men whom I know I would not return it in kind, and with maturity, I've learned ways to gracefully be very clear about that and the boundaries that I'd accept with them.
I've had a man "be in love with me" who really wasn't...it was just a way he'd learned to manipulate women who wanted to hear that. He felt it gave him all kinds of permissions he didn't have. It didn't, but I could see how easily that would work if I'd been more needy at the time.
But the good kind? Aaahhhhhh.....it feels good to be loved by a man whom I want to love me. It makes me feel a little prettier, a little happier...more full and complete. To be seen through the eyes of love is a very heady feeling. To be made love to by a man who is trying his very best to communicate his feelings with his words and carress.....mmmm....is to feel treasured and fulfilled in a quiet, hopeful way that feels like Spring. I am loved by a gentleman, and it brings a smile to my face.

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RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 9:42:27 AM

wandersalone

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When the love was reciprocated it really was like finally feeling a sense of belonging and wonderment that the person felt the same way that I felt about him. A real sense of 'phew, this guy really 'gets' me!

I had someone who loved me and I didn't feel the same depth of feelings, in that situation I felt guilty and uncomfortable and for some reason wondered if I had lead him on in some way however this was many years ago and I have figured out that he had a tendancy to form very close attachments to women very fast which he read as being in love with them.

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RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 2:30:58 PM

juliaoceania

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quote:

ORIGINAL: puella

I just thought it might be interesting to hear others speak about what it was like to know and feel what it meant to have someone in love with you.

Thanks.

I was deeply loved by two men. One was my exhusband, but he loved his drugs more than even his life. He loved me very passionately. Part of him still loved the idea of me as little as 5 years ago. I am the mother of his first born, and even though he loved the drugs more than me, he never remarried. He has two children with the woman he is presently with, and yet he told me that he did not want to marry her, part of the reason was me... One would think that this is a good feeling, but it isn't Puella, because like Tina Turner crooned What's love got to do with it?

The second person that I feel really loved me deeply I felt a sense of guilt over breaking his heart for many years. I was on the rebound from my marriage, and he was someone that I knew had a crush on me for years. I needed someone to lean on, someone who would jump when I said to, but as a submissive this was troubling and unnatural for me at the same time. He was gorgeous, sweet, he loved my son, and even my mother loved him... but I did not. I hurt him and that stayed with me for a long time. I went years without dating anyone new as a result. I knew what the power to hurt someone was, and it was not a responsibility or a power I wanted. It is hard to tell someone that wants to marry you that you just do not love them the way they love you. I worried about karma being visited on me because of this too, because in many ways I used him (even though this was not a conscious thing at the time).

So my experiences with being "loved" are not all they seem to be. In love anyways. I feel loved now, and I love in return, but what I think you are talking about is the young tempestuous love mostly visited on youth... the terrible type that leaves one with an ache to have that person at all costs, that is not what I desire anymore. I desire a partnership, my compliment, that person that can be relied upon and who is steady,... I do not know if that makes sense or not.

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Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

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RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 2:38:13 PM

IrishMist

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quote:

ORIGINAL: puella

It's not yet noon on Saturday and I am more random than usual.

Has anyone out there actually had someone who was in love with them? And I mean this totally disassociated from your being in love with that person (necessarily).

What was it like? How did you know it? What did it mean for you?....

What an odd question. I think it really comes down to what you would define as love.

My first Master loved me; yet I had no illusions that his definition of love was not the same as mine. Whereas my feelings for him made me more emotional towards our relationship; his made him more sadistic and cruel

AS for how I knew it; just in the little things that he would do. He never said the words but sometimes you would see a certain expression on his face; or he would speak in a certain way. Even with the words never spoken, I felt his love every day.

It actually would not have mattered one way or another in our relationship. I loved him and that was enough for me.

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RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 2:58:45 PM

ownedgirlie

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The love I received from my ex husband was a sick love that nearly destroyed me. I never want that kind of love again.

When I came to love my Master, I did so without ever expecting or asking to be loved in return. I simply needed him to accept my love, and to accept the way I expressed it. He welcomed it and cared for it. The day he told me he loved me, I burst into tears. I well up every time he says it. In love with me? I do not know that that's the case, it would depend on how one defines "in love." I do know I have never been loved more, never been cared for more deeply, and never felt as I do now. It is not a romantic love or a cuddly love by any means, but then I would not do well with that. But it is a love I see and feel every day.

Hard to answer your questions though. I feel like I have a safe haven - a home that is warm and welcoming. And I feel more gratitude than I know to express - not just because he loves me, but because of how he loves me. It makes my heart warm. And it makes me want to give everything I can possibly give.

Of course now I'm humming Nat King Cole:

There was a boy
A very strange enchanted boy
They say he wandered very far, very far
Over land and sea
A little shy and sad of eye
But very wise was he
And then one day
A magic day he passed my way
And while we spoke of many things
Fools and kings
This he said to me
"The greatest thing you'll ever learn
Is just to love and be loved in return"

< Message edited by ownedgirlie -- 4/28/2007 2:59:12 PM >

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RE: What does it feel like.. - 4/28/2007 3:32:03 PM

LadyIce

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As lovely and smart as you appear to be, it is hard to believe no one has been in love with you.
Maybe they were in love with you and scared to tell you?
For me, when someone is in love with me it makes me feel alive, valued, precious, safe, adored
and appreciated as a human being.

(in reply to puella)

Post #: 20

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