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hisannabelle -> RE: 25 lbs? (4/29/2007 11:55:42 AM)
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ORIGINAL: mixielicous
i am actually saddened that aesthetics should be a shameful thing. i want be be the best that i can be, and well dammit ME wanting to be that trophy slave, is something that i do for MYSELF and do as thanks for Him.
see, what i don't get is why weight has to be what makes one a trophy slave. i think i'm a trophy slave, but i am also 198lbs. i'm gorgeous, and a large part of what makes me gorgeous is the fact that i am confident in myself and in my position as His slave and His future wife regardless of how much i weigh.
He's not always going to be the man i fell in love with, just as i'm not always going to be exactly as i was when He fell in love with me. doesn't mean that we aren't still in love with each other...it just means a large part of commitment is commitment regardless of weight, illness, etc.
if you cannot stand to look at yourself in the mirror when you are not even overweight, that speaks to me personally of a negative body image, and losing weight isn't going to fix that in the long term, nor will it affect the psychological repercussions of said body image.
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On a side note: While their are many different opinions about submission and slavery. I am in the belief a slave should be pleasing. And most i think would agree with me. Subs and slaves talk about wanting to please a master/owner/dom. But when it comes right down to it many give fine print on how they want to please. A slave of mine will please me in anyway i tell her too., including losing 25 pounds. IF she does not? if she refuses? then she is only willing to please me under certain conditions. To me this isnt giving yourself. This is giving parts of you that are convient for you. Granted people have hard limits. Things that make this sick or just plain scares them to death. and that is fine. But i think alot of subs bring normal everyday things into things they will not do, just because its an inconvience to them.
On that note, again in my opinion, slaves should be pleasing in all ways, that includes pleasing to the eye. They should not only try to be as sexually appealing and pretty as they can be but they should want to be that way for their M/O/D. So why is it so many are eager to please when their legs are apart but have hestitations about sliming down a bit to look even sexier? perhaps its the opposite. perhaps the subs are so antisuperficial, they refuse to change their appearence because they will then feel like their dom is being superficial. When in fact, they should be trying to be the most pleasing sub/slave that dom has ever collared. It makes you wonder... who IS the guilty party? The Dom for wanting the sub/slave to looks as sexy and beautiful as she can? Or the sub/slave for refusing to( and often getting offended) make herself more sexually appealing?
it is damn near impossible for me to lose weight. if i could, and if i thought it would so influence His opinion of my appearance, i would. however, i can't. i eat well, i exercise, i walk almost 3 miles a day, and i am still in the obese range for my height. i think the problem here is that so many people equate thinness with beauty, and that's just not the case for some of us. some of us are considered beautiful (and sexually and aesthetically pleasing) by our dominants as well as ourselves regardless of how much we weigh. THAT is the kind of relationship i want. if He tossed me out on my ass because i was fat, we'd have big problems, considering the fact that He got together with me knowing my health history and the health problems i have that prevent me from losing weight. He doesn't force me to go to unhealthy lengths to lose the weight that healthy methods AREN'T getting off because i -don't- have any weight related health problems.
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There is a difference between submission and slavery. A slave should do whatever she is told. A submissive has more rights than that. As a submissive/bottom, I have LOTS of everyday things I wouldn't do for my dom. I wouldn't cut my hair short. I wouldn't move from my home. I wouldn't change careers. I wouldn't give up one of my pets. I wouldn't stop hanging out with my friends, etc.
geeky, i have loved your posts on this thread...i think they are very wise. i completely agree with you here. however, as someone who is a slave, who is property, i have to put in that there are plenty of slaves with owners who still don't impose this kind of bs on them.
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your statement also makes me think, M/s/D/s has sooo so so sso many different requirement, constraints, prerequisites etc, some much more weird, strange, nasty, rude than just weight. its shocking that requiring a good physical physique is so out of line.
mixie, you keep talking about games, requirements, prerequisites...makes me wonder what kind of m/s relationships you've entered into, because as a slave, i can't identify with any of what you're saying about that. just my humble experience. He didn't impose any games, constraints, requirements, or prerequisites on me...i gave up ownership of myself to Him of my own accord, and He treats that with maturity. neither of us believe in games.
on the whole, it's not any of my business except that you chose to post about it and i'm sharing my opinion - as someone who has been underweight, overweight, everywhere in between, who has an eating disorder, etc.... your entire attitude on this thread just screams bad body image to me, which won't cause you problems now, most likely, but probably will eventually in your relationship. it might be good just to keep that in mind.
annabelle.
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