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Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats*


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Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/3/2005 11:04:17 AM   
silkrose


Posts: 9
Joined: 4/17/2005
Status: offline 		I have been told that Subs are not allow to talk about what they want to eat/ when they master is done they are too is that right?... Is that being mean to the person or is a part of training .
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RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/3/2005 11:08:11 AM   
Padriag


Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline 		Depends on the individuals. Not everyone does that, some do. What did you agree to? If you didn't discuss it and agree with it before you got into the relationship that would be my first concern.

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to silkrose)
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RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/3/2005 11:11:49 AM   
EmeraldSlave2


Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		There is no such thing as a universal rule in Ds. There is nothing ALL subs can or cannot do. There are very few things A sub can or cannot do at ALL times.

What matters is what you've decided in your own personal relationship. Many subs have things they call "limits" or things that the dominant does not have authority over, the sub can do as he or she pleases.

While I would eat or not eat according to whatever the Owner ordered me, he does not take direct micro-management over my eating habits. This would be rather time consuming, tedious and pointless for us.

However, some people enjoy having that direct control within their relationships, perhaps as a diet control, perhaps as a sadistic pleasure, perhaps just because they want control. Lots of doms and subs like directly having control over an every day aspect of life such as emails, clothes, food, money, etc.

Again- there's no universal thing that a sub can or cannot do. We can or cannot do anything we consent to within the specific relationship.

(in reply to silkrose)
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RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/3/2005 11:31:17 AM   
ruffnecksbabygir


Posts: 412
Joined: 1/4/2005
Status: offline 		as mentioned above, there's not a yes or no answer to your question...you'd have to ask your Master or potential Master what is his personal preference. I have known Masters that will have their sub/slave kneel beside them and not eat until the Master is finished, other's will allow their sub/slave to eat with them and will allow them to choose their own meals etc.

Master allows me to choose pretty much my own meals, with some exceptions, and i am also allowed to sit & eat with Him. He knows there are certain foods i do not care for and He never pushes them on me. But again, this is all depends on the Top and whether or not they wish to control what you eat or how you eat.

_____________________________

~hugs~
Babygirl

:Disclaimer: The above is only this slave's opinion:

"And Those Who Danced Were Thought To Be Quite Insane By Those Who Could Not Hear The Music" -- Angela Monet

(in reply to EmeraldSlave2)
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RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/3/2005 11:33:16 AM   
siamsa24


Posts: 2426
Joined: 2/2/2004
Status: offline 		I agree that there is no universal rules, that is something important to keep in mind.

In my relationship my partner does control what I eat, but he does it because I asked if he would. I have struggled with an eating disorder for the past 6 years and I cannot recognize my body's signals saying that it is hungry. I interpret "hungry" as "sick"
He tells me when to eat and how much. I can take as long as I like, but he makes sure I get a certain number of calories every day.

(in reply to EmeraldSlave2)
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RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/3/2005 11:36:21 AM   
ElektraUkM


Posts: 309
Joined: 2/19/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: silkrose

I have been told that Subs are not allow to talk about what they want to eat/ when they master is done they are too is that right?... Is that being mean to the person or is a part of training .


No, that is not right.

Unless your master tells you that is how he wants it, and you agree... then you don't have to do that.

~ Elektra

(in reply to silkrose)
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RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/3/2005 11:39:26 AM   
MaitresseEden


Posts: 477
Joined: 8/8/2004
From: Houston, Texas
Status: offline 		Just because a person indentifies as submissive, doesn't mean that they consent to everything, nor does it mean that common sense and intelligence must be checked at the door. Some people get off to micromanaging another persons life. ( something I personally fail to comprehend) but as the previous posters said.. there is no carte blanche rule of what DS is. No Specific method of training, (albeit there are those who think there is) You can't cookie cutter a person into being something they arn't, you can try, but you will never be happy with them. So in a nutshell. TIME TO COMMUNICATE OPENLY about what your limits, wants, needs and desires are.

Ms. Eden

_____________________________

"If I didnt define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other peoples fantasies for me and eaten alive. - Audre Lorde"

(in reply to siamsa24)
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RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/3/2005 12:13:57 PM   
sputniklove


Posts: 39
Joined: 2/22/2005
Status: offline 		As is pointed out there are no fast rules...Ever....If you have a problem discuss this with your Master,and be clear on what you NEED in regard to this issue. As it was pointed out there are agreements,and what you may or may not have agreed to is what needs to be examined here. If you do not like the arrangement,you must modify thye agreement If one existed between the two of you. Relationships, D/s included evolve and this should not be excluded in your case either.

(in reply to silkrose)
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RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/3/2005 4:12:36 PM   
proudsub


Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline 		Everyone else already said it, it's between you and your dom. I choose my own food but always ask Hubby what he wants, in case he wants something different from what i am fixing.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan


(in reply to silkrose)
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RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/3/2005 5:40:58 PM   
MrKite


Posts: 94
Joined: 3/11/2005
Status: offline 		You really answered you question in your own profile. If you seek guidance then you agree in conversation as you build your relationship in what areas you seek that guidance. You also say you want to fulfill his desires and understand what he teaches you. All you have to do is meet someone that agrees with you on what you do and learn and earns your respect for doing it.



_____________________________

If it feels good, do it.

(in reply to silkrose)
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RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/3/2005 5:43:55 PM   
ProtagonistLily


Posts: 1222
Joined: 12/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

I have been told that Subs are not allow to talk about what they want to eat/ when they master is done they are too is that right?... Is that being mean to the person or is a part of training .


Right. Nor are they allowed to go to the bathroom without permission, speak to people without permission, and certainly don't write on these boards freely without their owner's supreme permission.

C'mon. Get real please. There are as many differant rules under which submissives live as their are D/s couples in this world.

Lily

_____________________________

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"
~Dr. Seuss~

(in reply to silkrose)
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RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/3/2005 5:50:36 PM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		What does your Master require? When you find that out you will have the answer to your question.
It doesn't matter what any of us think or say. We are not making the decisions for the two of you.
Some doms choose what food their submissives eat. Mine does....however my ex dom never did.
Just depends on how much control they want. If they happen to want that sort of control.

Only he can answer for you.

(in reply to silkrose)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/4/2005 1:15:21 PM   
Kinkypupper


Posts: 713
Joined: 9/26/2004
From: Portland oregon
Status: offline 		True depends on the relationship
If its a Dom/sub one then both are on a equal ground/footing
If its a Master/slave relationship then if that is a requirement from the Master then the "slave" has no choice as they have given all rights of 'self' to the Master

_____________________________

Phil Moulton
A Sensual Touch
Locopony Racing
Portland Oregon

(in reply to silkrose)
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RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/16/2005 9:44:15 PM   
SirSTRYKER


Posts: 284
Joined: 8/15/2004
Status: offline 		Over and over it's already been said, there is no fail proof method for this lifestyle. If Y/you T/two have discussed limits, (as I sure as Hell hope you have for if not and you have this much drama over eating, I'd pitty your ass if He's as sadistic as I am) then yes you should eat what He picks out for you. Damn if I have time to worry about what My wife eats...and damn if I'm fighting her over that nasty assed cottage cheeze she eats either. Fuck it, she can eat whatever she wants. I didn't marry and collar her for her diet ffs.

_____________________________

B.O.H.I.C.A. (bend over here it comes again.)

(in reply to Kinkypupper)
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RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/16/2005 11:24:50 PM   
Chilli


Posts: 42
Joined: 2/27/2005
Status: offline 		Peanut butter is a hard limit for me

(in reply to SirSTRYKER)
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RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/17/2005 8:20:55 AM   
SirSTRYKER


Posts: 284
Joined: 8/15/2004
Status: offline 		LMFBAO @ Chilli...are liver, mushrooms, and strawberries for This One.

_____________________________

B.O.H.I.C.A. (bend over here it comes again.)

(in reply to Chilli)
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RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/17/2005 9:08:37 AM   
SenorX


Posts: 142
Joined: 12/23/2004
Status: offline 		The reason for negotiations is to prevent something as this from happening after the fact.

If a sub advertises that she is willing to do so, then it becomes a part of the contract. If the topic is discussed beforehand and agreed upon by both parties, then the sub and the Dom/me should be bound to such. If not, then a discussion, negotiation, and agreement should be in order prior to such becoming the rule.

However, if the sub has agreed to being a slave, then a difference exists.

Best Regards,

X

(in reply to Chilli)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/21/2005 9:14:13 PM   
BeautifulDoll


Posts: 107
Joined: 4/14/2005
Status: offline 		my Master chooses my food for me most of the time but since we are still getting to know one another in our 24/7 relationship He has been letting me pick out my food until He is able to know what i do and do not like to eat. i like for Him to choose my food when He does, i feel more like a little girl as well as more like He owns me. i love that feeling.

(in reply to silkrose)
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RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/23/2005 4:18:11 AM   
Msnaughtyjo


Posts: 8
Joined: 5/19/2005
Status: offline 		In my opinion submissives choose to obey their mistress/master . There should always be ground rules set before and contract or a deal is agreed.....As long as you are happy with the master choosing what you eat and that it is healthy and balanced and that the food causes you no harm or reaction. Then in my opinion why not give it a whirl say on a temporary basis and see how you feel x




Attachment (1)

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Bdsm is an art , therefore i am an artist ...and you my dear slave are my canvass.....Kneel you may kiss my hand

(in reply to BeautifulDoll)
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RE: Can a *Sub refuse what her Master picks what she eats* - 5/25/2005 3:45:23 PM   
masterdarkthorn


Posts: 13
Joined: 5/22/2005
Status: offline 		Where is it chiseled in stone that a sub must eat what the master says. It seems some of you take this role playing thing just a bit too seriously.

(in reply to Msnaughtyjo)
Profile   Post #: 20
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