Is it rape if she likes it? (Full Version)

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DaddyDeSade -> Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 4:31:30 PM)

After class I was sitting with a friend and two acquaintances of hers who I do not know. and the two stranger women got to discussing the question if it is still rape if she likes it. Let me say first in my opinion it is always rape if it is non-consensual and is always wrong. One of these girls said that if a girl enjoys the experience it stops being rape. And then goes on to define enjoys the experience as having an orgasm. Then I hear the other girl say no one would ever orgasm during rape. And there I sit with a girl who was kidnapped for four days by a neighbor at 19 and kept tied to a bed and repeatedly raped. She came at least once every time and was in therapy for years dealing with it. This situation almost came to blows very quickly. First when the other girl didn't believe her, again when she said, "well there must be something going on with you, because no normal woman would cum during rape."
Last time I checked orgasm was a physical thing a person could not always control. Especially possibly because my friend had always fantasized about rape. So her body could experience something her mind was not totally on board with. Which was another thing she had to work out in therapy. If anything she is more into fake rape now then before as a way of working through the trauma on her own terms. But I have to say it was still definitely rape.
How could educated young ladies of maybe 20-21 in university be so foolish? I know they are in at least one critical thinking class because that was the class I was sitting in on when I met them.




popeye1250 -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 4:33:49 PM)

(SHHHHH!) She's supposed to "struggle!"




CuriousLord -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 4:35:13 PM)

I've known a lot of rape victims.  Most have, to their utter abhorance, orgasmed.

The worst part about rape is how it screws the body and mind.  The body loves it- just like sex or masturbation.  It's the mind that deplores it.  (Unless, of course, the rapist is just really sucky.  Then both body and mind hate it, which, if you ask me, is a lot easier on the victim psycologically.)




Masterdarkone26 -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 4:49:34 PM)

It is STILL RAPE... even if they enjoy it and orgasm from it.. but there are many who have that desire and so want it but won't let themselves fully go because of the emotional part of it getting in the way...

Watch them scirm but get so wet from being helpless..




NakedOnMyChain -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 4:50:45 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddyDeSade
One of these girls said that if a girl enjoys the experience it stops being rape. And then goes on to define enjoys the experience as having an orgasm. Then I hear the other girl say no one would ever orgasm during rape.


What she's essentially saying is that someone you find extremely attractive and have killer chemistry with, yet will not have sex with, can force himself on you and if your body reacts to that chemistry, it means you're into it.  HA!  That's ridiculous.  Not all physical reactions are willing, and it is entirely possible to orgasm during rape.  Does that mean it's not rape?  Of course not.  It's rape.  It's just not as brutal as it could have been.  It's still brutal.

It sounds like these girls have lived very sheltered lives, and possibly have a problem saying no to men.  Possessing intelligence does not preclude that they use it.




selfbnd411 -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 4:58:12 PM)

quote:


How could educated young ladies of maybe 20-21 in university be so foolish?


I would challenge the notion that many 20-21 year olds in a University are educated.




FirmhandKY -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 5:02:29 PM)

Lack of consent defines rape, not lack of pleasure.

FirmKY




hisannabelle -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 5:06:00 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CuriousLord

I've known a lot of rape victims.  Most have, to their utter abhorance, orgasmed.

The worst part about rape is how it screws the body and mind.  The body loves it- just like sex or masturbation.  It's the mind that deplores it.  (Unless, of course, the rapist is just really sucky.  Then both body and mind hate it, which, if you ask me, is a lot easier on the victim psycologically.)


i agree wholeheartedly.

did my body respond during my rape? yes. is it still an abhorrent violation of both body and mind? yes. just because i got wet didn't mean i wanted it to happen. that part of it makes it -worse-, actually.

daddydesade, the sad thing is that people think all kinds of stupid shit about rape - like if you dress a certain way, or act a certain way, you must be asking for it, for example. rape is still rape, no matter how many people try to make it sound prettier or less of a terrible, awful thing because of circumstances. i don't know if it's stupidity, ignorance, maybe denial of how devastating rape can be, but unfortunately people always have and probably always will try to minimize it by saying things like this.




NakedOnMyChain -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 5:19:22 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: selfbnd411

quote:


How could educated young ladies of maybe 20-21 in university be so foolish?


I would challenge the notion that many 20-21 year olds in a University are educated.


I agree, but I don't think the ante is high enough, considering it's a sure win.




slaveluci -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 6:16:57 PM)

If enjoying such physical sensations means you liked it and it wasn't wrong, i guess that means all the little children who are molested really wanted it?  Sometimes biology simply takes over and we as humans enjoy such sensations even though what is happening to us is wrong and criminal.  "Liking" those feelings doesn't mean it's not rape..................slave luci 




velvetears -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 6:31:30 PM)

Rape is about violence and control, not sex (which is the vehicle of that violence and control).  It also entails violating a person in a sexual manner.  i doubt that any woman, even if she orgasmed during rape, enjoys the experience.  Physiological responses cannot be helped, but that doesn't mean the victim wanted or responded to the experience emotionally/mentally. 

If i go outside and it's cold out my nipples will get hard - does that mean cold weather turns me on? 




CuriousLord -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 6:49:08 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: velvetears

Rape is about violence and control, not sex


Not to pick on you, I just hate this line.  It's so cliche and it's not accurate!

Rape can be about violence and control and not sex.
Rape can be about sex.
It can swing either way.  Or both.  It's freaking rape.




velvetears -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 7:19:49 PM)

It is accurate - read the research.




Sinergy -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 7:25:57 PM)

 
I have worked with 100s of rape survivors.

The wisdom (or lack of) that I have gleaned from them is that the major personal issue is not orgasming during the rape, enjoying the rape, whatever.  While that impacts her psyche somewhat, it is not the major issue.

It is the loss of control.  The non-consensual sense she is left with that she had no choice in the matter.

When those have had physical enjoyment of the act, it simply worsens the sense of loss of control and rape of her self-worth from having her choice ripped from her by the rapist.

Sinergy

p.s.  I am feeling rather happy tonight, I was mean to high schoolers today, and 2/3 of the graduates of the high school I am a mock assailant at are graduates of our program, and the fact that I feel tired and beaten up by those vicious harridans helps me to believe that a world where rape and violence against humans might someday exist.




CuriousLord -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 7:42:52 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: velvetears

It is accurate - read the research.


Cite the research.

I disagree from first hand research.  I find alleged and uncited sources a dubious claim base.




Hanable -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 7:43:26 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: FirmhandKY

Lack of consent defines rape, not lack of pleasure.

FirmKY


i agree totally... consent or the lack there of defines wether its rape or not.. not the pleasure the victum gets out of it. if someone cums it means there body is doing what is saposed to. ther persona has very little say if any wether they cum or not. and besides just because i fantasie about being raped or anything else does not mean id like it when/if it ever happens.

H >:)




Sinergy -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 7:45:42 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: velvetears

It is accurate - read the research.


Uh, CuriousLord is correct.

It is rape.

On the other hand, I dont think it is sex.

Susan Brownmiller, "Men, Women, and Rape."

Let me know if you need dozens of other sources after you finish that book.

Sinergy




farglebargle -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 7:47:51 PM)

I think we agree that central to the definition of "Rape" ( as opposed to role-playing ) is the concept of "the use of ones person without their consent"

Then, is it Inherently Evil?

It is an act so abhorrent to our sense of Right and Moral so that it is ALWAYS WRONG, and there simply cannot be any excuse for it, ever?





MissDiscipline -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 7:55:46 PM)

My question ... Is it rape if he likes it ? Is it possible to rape my male sub if I force him to endure   my strap on and he starts enjoying it?




CuriousLord -> RE: Is it rape if she likes it? (5/3/2007 8:02:15 PM)

As others have said, this is based on consent.  Knowing he's your sub, I can only assume that he consents.  So, no, it's not rape.

If he has a limit against strap-ons, and you do it to him anyway, then, yes, it's rape.




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