Plan B

Plan B (Full Version)

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puella -> Plan B (5/3/2007 9:09:42 PM)
So who out here has a Plan B or person B.... If you are plan or person B... how do you feel about it... By 'plan B' I mean.... the person you reconcile yourself to, or the person you turn to when your heart is broken and you resort to knowing you will never really get what you really want... just the shit you settle for... What kind of masochism/sadism is Plan B?

SimplyMichael -> RE: Plan B (5/3/2007 9:12:51 PM)
Puella, You are a fabulous woman and it is really too bad you don't know it. Anyone who thinks of you as plan B is an asshole.

spanklette -> RE: Plan B (5/3/2007 9:14:41 PM)
I wish I could tell you that I have a Plan A... As far as being someone else's Plan B, I'm not sure that's something I could deal with from a confidence standpoint. I don't think I would like the feeling of being someone's go to person, as a last resort. That's an emotional masochism level that wouldn't be healthy for me.

hisannabelle -> RE: Plan B (5/3/2007 9:23:51 PM)
when i read the thread title i thought this was going to be on emergency birth control ;) quote: ORIGINAL: spanklette As far as being someone else's Plan B, I'm not sure that's something I could deal with from a confidence standpoint. I don't think I would like the feeling of being someone's go to person, as a last resort. That's an emotional masochism level that wouldn't be healthy for me. i'm with spanklette on this one. i've been someone's plan b before, and i don't like it. i don't have a "plan b." and i agree with simplymichael as well...puella, you are a plan a girl. you are too lovely to be anyone's second fiddle. annabelle.

BondageTopJere -> RE: Plan B (5/3/2007 9:27:02 PM)
Lol, if only I had this problem, because getting to the Plan B person require having actaully had a Plan A one at some point.

IrishMist -> RE: Plan B (5/3/2007 9:43:41 PM)
quote: What kind of masochism/sadism is Plan B? the kind that slowly and methodically destroys the soul and spirit.

Sirandlittle1 -> RE: Plan B (5/3/2007 9:46:03 PM)
To all you plan B's out there. People can only treat you as a plan b, for as long as you allow them to! Vote with your feet, or put up and shut up. You decide your worth, not another. little1

juliaoceania -> RE: Plan B (5/3/2007 9:49:40 PM)
I have had someone attempt to keep me as a plan B, but I got a life[;)]. Seriously, if someone came to me everytime they broke up with someone else expecting me to pick up their pieces I wouldn't go there. I had a plan B when I was on the rebound from my marriage. It is a really wrong thing to do, and I have regretted it more than once. I was young and hurting and alone. I swore I would never do that again, and so far I have remained true to that. Many times people start out as plan B, but end up being anything but that. It does happen, especially when both people are using each other for a plan B, and surprisingly enough figure out they are each other's A. It happened to my mom. After she lost my father, she started dating a divorcee. They ended up together for over 20 years, until he passed away too.... Neither were a plan A, they were just trying to get along in the world a day at a time... it happens.

MagiksSlave -> RE: Plan B (5/3/2007 10:00:16 PM)
I dont play secent fiddle, why should I, when there is a first chair some where out there for me!!! Magik's slave

Elorin -> RE: Plan B (5/3/2007 10:12:34 PM)
Well...see being poly, I currently have Plan A...he's the one I go to when Plan B never works out (subs, females, other lovers). But while I have good friends who have been a shoulder to cry on when relationships fail, I don't have on steady person that I cry to. But then I tend to have long relationships, never done the '2 or 3 months' and then it is over thing. ~E

canupleaseme -> RE: Plan B (5/3/2007 11:05:52 PM)
The only time Ive ever had a plan B was the last year of my marraige. My plan didnt involve another person though. I think if I was someones plan B it would wear me down. Never be second best, life is way to short

sublizzie -> RE: Plan B (5/4/2007 12:35:05 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: juliaoceania Many times people start out as plan B, but end up being anything but that. It does happen, especially when both people are using each other for a plan B, and surprisingly enough figure out they are each other's A. Sometimes you think you are someone's Plan B but find out that, amazingly, you were their Plan A all along. They just thought you had them as your Plan B so they didn't try very hard even though they were your Plan A too. Sometimes it's all communication, communication, communication.

Vendaval -> RE: Plan B (5/4/2007 2:25:24 AM)
I second what Simply Michael said. [:D]

Quivver -> RE: Plan B (5/4/2007 2:42:32 AM)
I have always been someone who's used the alphabetic plan system. Plan A is that mythical creature I search for, who most likely doesnt exist. Plan B is who ever can/will/does come as close as possible to Plan A. Plan C is my reality and where I spend most of my time. It's where all the realizations that at where I am in life that I may need to alter Plans A and B. But this plan doesnt include settling for at all. This is where I try to build strength in myself and better myself in ways that assist in realizing I'll be ok when none of the damn plans work out. On the flip side of that. It's the reality of my Plan C that helps me avoid being Plan B to another.

m0rgan -> RE: Plan B (5/4/2007 2:48:18 AM)
theres a plan??

Aileen68 -> RE: Plan B (5/4/2007 2:56:29 AM)
I've had relationships with plan b people. At the time and the place, they were plan a. I've been a plan b for one and a plan c for another. I didn't mind being plan b since they were also my plan b, but I didn't like being plan c. I felt like an afterthought most of the times with him. That was confusing.

windchymes -> RE: Plan B (5/4/2007 4:17:14 AM)
I've been Plan B a couple times and, at the risk of sounding all melodramatic, it almost destroyed me. Took me a long time to get self-confidence back and get rid of self-loathing for allowing it to happen. I feel an overwhelming sense of "there must be something wrong with me, why wasn't I good enough?"...and so on Now, at the first whiff of suspicion that I may be a Plan B, I'm out that door so fast, hoping the door WILL hit me in the ass, because it will help me get away even faster! [:)] I won't be anybody's back-up plan!

IrishMist -> RE: Plan B (5/4/2007 4:25:50 AM)
I willingly placed myself in a position to be 'plan B'; and like you said wind, it slowly destroys the spirit and the soul. Never again.

MstrssPassion -> RE: Plan B (5/4/2007 4:34:07 AM)
{fast reply} I don't have this sort of plan B in my life over a decade ago I made a commitment to self, to never settle for anything or anyone who is less than best for me because of this I could never be a plan b & any plan b that would have existed would have been eliminated

puella -> RE: Plan B (5/4/2007 5:31:44 AM)
Hello Elorin, I think you are nibbling aound the edges of something really interesting (and what really prompted my question.. I was not necessarily getting super personal with this post, I just thought it would make interesting conversation and ideas surface.. but thanks to everyone for the love, heh!) So you do utilze a plan B person now and again.. it would be interesting to hear from a plan B person in a similar situation ... there is a lot of darkness immediately associated with being a plan B (on my part as well).. I wonder if there are those who are happy and fulfilled with that place?

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