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DarkDreams123 -> RE: Better for D/s? (5/10/2007 7:54:19 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: puella
Can a person, even if in a potentially destructive and unhappy relationship, be a better person because of some aspect of that relationship (perhaps in this case extreme devotion and power exchange) than if in a ‘healthy space’ (how wildly empowered and new agey of me, eh?) alone?
Greetings puella,
I have been reading your thread and thinking about what you and the others have been saying. I have a bit of a "contrary" point of view on this.
What's so wrong with admitting that there were some good things to a relationship that, ultimately, had to be ended. I know that you are aware enough to see that relationships are complex things: they aren't entirely either good or bad, but a mixture of the two. When we say a relationship is "bad", we usually don't mean that it is all bad, but that the bad outweighs the good.
It sounds to me like you have just a little touch of hubris in you that you don't want to admit that being in a relationship might bring out the best in you. I think this is true for most of us. Being in a relationship, even if it is not an ideal one, challenges us to move outside of ourselves. It gives us someone to focus our "good intentions" on. Why should this realization cause you dismay unless it is your pride that is suffering?
I hope that my "tone" is not perceived by you as harsh; it is not meant to be so.
I wish you well.
-DarkDreams
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