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RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 9:08:50 AM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		If I want to have penetrative sex, then it does not put me in a submissive positon. It is still my desire getting there, and it is by submitting to my desire whenever and wherever I want it that makes Fox submissive to me. I control the situation, and do not lose that control JUST because he is inside me, or becasue I have an orgasm. IF he is bound, blinf folded and I decide to take him that way, I cant imagine how anyone could see him as the dominant part of that.
Does using a dildo to get off make you submissive? No, course not. So, why would using your submissive to get off be any different? You are still using him to do it, he is just along for the ride.

DV


_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
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*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

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Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 10:43:04 AM   
Pyrrsefanie


Posts: 1222
Joined: 9/18/2007
From: NEW HAMPSHAAAAAAH!
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DominantJenny

Not that you haven't already been shocked out of your socks by now, but I generally prefer the missionary position. Why? Excuse me, but I get to lay back and enjoy while he does all the work. Works for me.


Quoted for motherfucking truth.

What can I say... I'm lazy.


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Read my series, Taking Jessica, on http://www.akashaweb.com !

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RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 10:45:48 AM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline 		Another tired sexist stereotype.

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RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 11:53:52 AM   
MladyHathor


Posts: 510
Joined: 4/6/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chezzy71

I would be shocked if any Domina actually enjoyed the missionary position....or doggie style for that matter although that can be fun...it is not a pre-conceived notion either..a Domina belongs on top..that's my story and i am sticking to it.


Be careful of assumptions and generalizations dear, your lack of gag therapy is showing.

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RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 12:16:17 PM   
chezzy71


Posts: 412
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Status: offline 		I guess ceases never wonder do they??

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RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 12:16:45 PM   
ElanSubdued


Posts: 1511
Status: offline 		hands0n0knees,

quote:

hands0n0knees to ShaktiSama:
I, like any good Nietzschean, accept the fictionality of the metaphysical activity/passivity opposition.  But, as you say, it has been a cultural signifier of submission throughout history: naval culture, prison culture, molly houses, ancient Greek pedagogy, and so on.


You know Mr. Knees, sometimes it's much more poignant to be succinct and direct.  Just tell Shakti you think she's hot.  The rest of us already know she is and that you think so too. :-)

Elan.

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RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 12:27:53 PM   
Vestonika


Posts: 95
Joined: 12/23/2007
Status: offline 		domme's who let males fuck them...?

that's not a domme that's a self-indulgent weak bitch.

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Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 12:30:28 PM   
ElanSubdued


Posts: 1511
Status: offline 		Silverbunny,

I'll reply to your key theme by quoting Shawn:

quote:

Why would a dominant woman deny herself something that she finds pleasurable?  Isn't she supposed to be in control of her own desires?  Isn't she supposed to do as she pleases?


In case it's not obvious why I quoted Shawn, in my opinion, no act in the domain of "what it is that we do" is inherently dominant or submissive.  Rather, it's whatever the partners desire and communicate it to be.  Therefore, if a Domina decides she wants to be penetrated, doggie style, in the ass (note, I've thrown in some ass fucking just for extra rhetorical, juxtaposed, machismo), I see nothing submissive about this.  Nor, when her submissive complies as she requests, do I see any role and/or power reversal for the submissive.

Hope this provides insight into your quandary. :-)

Elan.

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RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 12:34:15 PM   
ElanSubdued


Posts: 1511
Status: offline 		Vestonika,

quote:

domme's who let males fuck them...?

that's not a domme that's a self-indulgent weak bitch.


Qualifier:  in your, obviously humble, opinion.

Elan.

(in reply to Vestonika)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 12:43:17 PM   
BOUNTYHUNTER


Posts: 9259
Joined: 2/5/2004
Status: offline 		This is a crock of bull.I have had sex with many very Dom woman at varierous time in my life,does this mean they are submissive to me,maybe but I think the stikma of the LS that says you can't be pentrated or enjoy sex with a sub that brings them my way...I am married to a Domme/Mistress,Yes shes is submissive in our bed.. We enjoy sex when every and however I want it..She has no problem with pentration by the man she loves..

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RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 1:12:07 PM   
TermsConditions


Posts: 446
Joined: 11/13/2007
Status: offline 		I'd push this question further and maybe it should be another thread...but is there such a thing an an "Inherently Submissive" act?

Fer instance a Dom woman performing oral on a male sub? Isn't performing oral an act of submission? My limited experience includes a lengthy relationship with a very Dommish woman that totally turned that idea upside down.

Though I did not understand anything about D / s at the time I understood she was in complete control and only after several hours of intense buildup would she allow me release.

This went on daily for two years. It ended when I realized I had not seen friends or family for months, I was getting 2-3 hours of sleep a night and that she had been dressing me in Garanimals. I freaked and bolted. 

Point is any act done properly can demonstrate Domination.



< Message edited by TermsConditions -- 5/8/2008 1:31:27 PM >

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RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 1:21:42 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Vestonika

domme's who let males fuck them...?

that's not a domme that's a self-indulgent weak bitch.

I was about to ask you out, but then I noticed that you Hard Limit mathematics.  I guess we're not compatible after all.


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RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 1:32:20 PM   
ShaktiSama


Posts: 1674
Joined: 8/13/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ElanSubdued
You know Mr. Knees, sometimes it's much more poignant to be succinct and direct.  Just tell Shakti you think she's hot.  The rest of us already know she is and that you think so too. :-)


*snort*  Speak for yourself, Elan! 

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RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 1:37:42 PM   
TermsConditions


Posts: 446
Joined: 11/13/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ShaktiSama

quote:

ORIGINAL: ElanSubdued
You know Mr. Knees, sometimes it's much more poignant to be succinct and direct.  Just tell Shakti you think she's hot.  The rest of us already know she is and that you think so too. :-)


*snort*  Speak for yourself, Elan! 


Apocalyptic shades of Conrad!

"...teh hotness...teh...hotness...teh...hotness...."

But I *want* to get out of the boat....

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TnC
Married, Novice Subbish-Type Person
and rider of the Drama Llama.

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RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 1:59:59 PM   
ElanSubdued


Posts: 1511
Status: offline
quote:

ShaktiSama:
*snort*  Speak for yourself, Elan! 


Nice try Shakti, but it won't work.  You're even sexier when you snort.  We *all* know this too. :-)

Elan.

< Message edited by ElanSubdued -- 5/8/2008 2:02:16 PM >

(in reply to ShaktiSama)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 2:39:46 PM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Vestonika

domme's who let males fuck them...?

that's not a domme that's a self-indulgent weak bitch.

Self indulgent, hell yeah... its one of the perks of being a DOMME!

Just becasue you are a lesbian doesnt mean those of us who enjoy males are weak. It means we enjoy what we enjoy.
You'll get over yourself soon enough, I am sure.

Personally, I think any Dominant who limits themseves by what someone else says they should or shouldnt do is weak... but thats my opinion. The whole reason for being the Dominant party is becasue you enjoy being the one who is in charge, not taking orders.

DV


_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to Vestonika)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 2:54:30 PM   
aidan


Posts: 904
Joined: 5/28/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ElanSubdued

quote:

ShaktiSama:
*snort*  Speak for yourself, Elan! 


Nice try Shakti, but it won't work.  You're even sexier when you snort.  We *all* know this too. :-)

Elan.

Mmmm, it's true. She's loverly when she makes grunting noises. :-p

But, yeah. This whole thing about penetration being submissive or dominant is an old, old trope of BDSM communities. Older than any of us, I'd mainge.

Fact is, it's all in how ya do it.

Her being pushed up against a wall while he snarls mean things to her and hits her and tweaks her nipples: probably dominant penetration.

Him being straddled while she slaps him, tugs his hair and calls him nasty names when he cries: probably submissive penetration.

Yay for subjective interpreations of objective experience!


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RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 3:55:41 PM   
Politesub53


Posts: 14862
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TermsConditions

I'd push this question further and maybe it should be another thread...but is there such a thing an an "Inherently Submissive" act?



Yes Terms, its called "Washing the dishes" 

(in reply to TermsConditions)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 4:12:57 PM   
hopelessfool


Posts: 988
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		I dont think any act in its self is submissive or dominant. Even giving orders or demanding something of another. If my (Imaginary) Owner wants to fuck me he does as such. If I want to be fucked I would beg for it accordingly. Because He allows me the pleasure of being penitrated is he submitting to me? No. Hes showing me hes the one in control because hes telling me when where how and such If he rubs my feet after a long day at work is he submitting to me? No Hes caring for his pet the way he sees fit. The "Doing that makes you undomly or unsubly" is just someone trying to force everyone into their own opinion or veiw. Personally I live in my own little world on my own little planet and nothing no one says save my owner is going to change that.

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RE: Is Penetration Inherently Submissive? - 5/8/2008 5:04:27 PM   
hands0n0knees


Posts: 80
Joined: 2/19/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ElanSubdued

hands0n0knees,

quote:

hands0n0knees to ShaktiSama:
I, like any good Nietzschean, accept the fictionality of the metaphysical activity/passivity opposition.  But, as you say, it has been a cultural signifier of submission throughout history: naval culture, prison culture, molly houses, ancient Greek pedagogy, and so on.


You know Mr. Knees, sometimes it's much more poignant to be succinct and direct.  Just tell Shakti you think she's hot.  The rest of us already know she is and that you think so too. :-)

Elan.


That was extremely succinct.  You're lucky I didn't add footnotes.  I would have done, but my wheelbarrow was due back at the library

I actually find obscurantist terrorism very comforting, and I practise it whenever I can.  It would be like leaving the womb again if I took your advice.  So I will say good day, sir.

(in reply to ElanSubdued)
Profile   Post #: 60
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