I thought you didn't like me (Full Version)

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mistoferin -> I thought you didn't like me (5/10/2007 8:09:12 PM)

I was at a lifestyle gathering having lots of fun talking with a group of people. Later in the evening one girl said to me "Wow, you're soooo much different than I thought you were." I said how so? "You're really funny, down to earth and easy to get along with. You're warm and friendly and not stuck up and well.....you're not a bitch". Rather shocked I looked at her and asked her where on earth she would have gotten those impressions, had we met before? She said no, but you were pretty hard on me on a thread on collarme and well...."I thought you didn't like me". She went on to say that she was really intimidated at the thought of meeting me.

Well in all honesty, I didn't remember what she was referring to. It had been awhile ago and when I got home I looked it up. I didn't see where I was particularly hard on her....I did disagree with her opinion on something though. There were also several threads that I found where I was in agreement with her.

Do you feel that because someone disagrees with you here on collarme that they "don't like you"? Do you think that if someone else's opinion is different it's a personal thing between you and they?



ownedgirlie -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/10/2007 8:10:27 PM)

It depends how they deliver the message.



spanklette -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/10/2007 8:15:57 PM)

Nah...as long as there aren't any personal insults, I consider debate a helathy thing. If our opinions vary then I enjoy learning about other people's perspectives, even if they don't change mine....sometimes, rarely, but sometimes they do.
 
In an online forum, no, I don't really think people are making a personal judgement on me based on my thoughts...maybe they are, but I have not found that to be so in our local community.



earthycouple -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/10/2007 8:34:18 PM)

I simply don't worry about it.  If you like me you do, if you don't you don't...I can't change that and don't have the energy to expend to try.



Eruditegirl -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/10/2007 8:37:39 PM)

It's the internet....so a few words of advice from someone I don't know or will most likely never meet...although greatly appreciated advice...and I sincerly listen/read the advice...but it doesn't affect me in a way of..."Oh they don't like me"...or "I don't like them"...that would be more on a personal level...and even then...I have to respect a person before there thoughts/opinion of me have any validity....there are 3 Doms on here whose opinions I would take on a personal level...2 because I have meet them and it has moved beyond the internet...and 1 just because he is an arrogant shit...but gives excellent advice....



MistressLorelei -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/10/2007 8:46:10 PM)

I think there are people who may have no interest in getting to know me further, based on my opinions/views/etc on the boards here, but I don't think someone who has only read a few comments on a message board can legitimately not like someone.... and if they do, then I could care less.

IMO, someone hung up on being popular online, or one who be upset to be 'un-liked' in an on-line forum likely has self-esteem issues.




mstrjx -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/10/2007 8:51:03 PM)

I think to date I've only met one person from CM first.  That's been pretty cool so far.

Whether I will meet others in passing over the next months/years might have more to do with Lifestyle events than anything.  Not too many people here know who I am, or what I look like.  But I don't think I've done any bridge-burning by any of my posts.

I don't know of anyone I would try to avoid.  In some cases, that's saying a LOT!

Jeff



TheHeretic -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/10/2007 9:28:02 PM)

      That's why I turned in my paddles for debate purposes.  I've met a few other people who are on CM, but none yet who are active in the same forums I tend to hang in.  You develop an impression of other posters, but what shows up on the monitor is a pretty limited view of the whole person.

    



marieToo -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/10/2007 9:54:18 PM)

 I think most often someone just genuinely disagrees with another person and it doesn't mean they dont like them. 

When someone disagrees with me personally, I dont sit here thinking that they must dislike me.  In most cases, I would feel that they think I'm debate-worthy, in other cases someone is just hedging for an argument from someone...anyone. 

In my case, those who dislike me, pretty much avoid or ignore me, which I think is  the best course of action for anyone who doesnt like someone.



szobras -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/10/2007 10:14:36 PM)

Do you feel that because someone disagrees with you here on collarme that they "don't like you"?
No
Do you think that if someone else's opinion is different it's a personal thing between you and they?
Not unless they make it apparent,and I accept it to be so.



N4SDChastity -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/10/2007 10:17:12 PM)

I've had a few people (nope, no  names) come at me accusing me of being "mean," or not liking them, or haveing something personal against them, based on comments I've mde on the forums.  I try to inform them that, for the most part, I try to be humorous, where I feel it's needed.  Also, in those istances where I do respond in a more serious vein, it is because the topic did not easily lend itself to my brand of humor, or, my opinion was more deeply felt.  Either way, just because I have a different opinion doesn't mean I hate you, quite the contrary, I'm more inclined to like people who challenge my view, and provide me with a venue to "prove" my convictions.  In those instances, I do my level best to put forth my arguments (or disagreements with your arguments) in as straight-forward and dispassionate a manner as I can muster. 

I like EVERYBODY...  YOU'RE next!!!



HutchGarahl -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/10/2007 10:46:29 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin
Do you feel that because someone disagrees with you here on collarme that they "don't like you"?

No

Do you think that if someone else's opinion is different it's a personal thing between you and they?

No


Not sure how anyone can dislike someone they've never actually met. There are a few ladies here who I hold their advice in high regards because they have shown sensability and care for the people they talk to. There are a few guys here who I hold in the same manner. Although one guy seems to be a pompous ass at times, he does give great advice. Then we have the troll who tends to delight everyone. :) But normally, I don't dislike anyone till they give me reason to.



RavenMuse -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/11/2007 1:01:42 AM)

I can agree with a person I dislike, I can disagree with a person I like. It isn't wether we see eye to eye about certain issues but rather what their personality seems to be that determines wether I like them or not.



MistressSassy66 -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/11/2007 1:14:18 AM)

If someone disagrees with Me all it means is they have a different way of looking at things than I do.Its no big deal unless they think their way is the only way or
they insult Me personally for not thinking they are right.

I'm not here to be popular and post away until I have some cool title.

I'm here to help people through My real life experiences that I get in part by being a Pro-Domina and in part by being a Lifestyle Domina.

An added benefit is that it lets potential submissives know where I stand and quite a few have commented they like My posts.

So I'm here to stay and enjoy the benefits I get from reading posts and
meeting all the awesome submissives that I do.
Even if it doesnt work out its a learning experience and you can always use those.




MaamJay -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/11/2007 1:21:19 AM)

There are a few people here that I probably wouldn't like to meet because they have shown themselves to readily resort to being spiteful to others and take things to an unnecessarily personal level. I know we wouldn't have a remotely compatible world view and life's too short to spend it arguing! However, that said, I would relish meeting most people here because they are capable of making rational replies and are interesting in sharing ideas, whether I agree with them or not has nothing to do with like or dislike.

At least the girl saw a different side of the OP anyway!

Maam Jay aka violet[A]



Copulo -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/11/2007 1:53:43 AM)

I think it depends on one mood. If my mood is not good then I sometimes mistake something as a personal jibe, if my mood is good then I would probably see nothing in that same post. The written word is a powerful thing as it can be read in so many different ways.
There is a huge difference between disagreeing and silly sarcasm. Disagreements lead to debate and are healthy but sarcasms can cut deeply and are often used as a form of bullying.
If we all sat here and agreed with one another then we would have very boring posts. The whole point is to get opinions. I must admit though that when the girl brigade clique come out in force to protect each other, regardless of weather they actually agree or not, I find that very shallow.
I do find the people who bitch on the boards are often very different in real life. Boards give some people a confidence that they lack in reality.
I was friends (real life) with a female that continually bitched to others on the boards. There was no rhyme nor reason for picking out her victims other than she saw them as weak and homed in on that weakness. Last year I told her to her face that I had made a decision to drop our friendship. I told her that her nasty ways on the boards (towards others) was nothing less than bullying and that I did not mix with bullies. She was very upset that I could do this, but that was her issue and not mine.

I have no qualms whatsoever when I meet someone in rl who have been nasty (not necessarily to me) on the boards, in asking them why they behave in such a way.



MstrssPassion -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/11/2007 4:59:59 AM)

Do you feel that because someone disagrees with you here on collarme that they "don't like you"?

No

Do you think that if someone else's opinion is different it's a personal thing between you and they?

No


I don't handle people with kid gloves. I figure if they are going to be so overly sensitive about mere words on the screen, how the heck are they going to deal with me (or others) in a real time situation where parties disagree. Disagreement is a very real fact of life & to think different is going to cause a great deal of grief in life.



imtempting -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/11/2007 5:17:44 AM)

If you set out to make people like you on  a internet forum then you may aswell not be here as you would have nothing of importance to say.

I've pissed off many, many people but many if any will ever meet me so I may aswell say what I think no matter what harm it will cause.



sambamanslilgirl -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/11/2007 5:20:30 AM)

not here to be liked, popular or part of a "clique".  it doesn't matter to me whether you agree or disagree with my opinions ...i'm merely here to express my opinions, meet others and have some fun. though there are a select few i do admire and respect here on the forums.



PrincessEllie -> RE: I thought you didn't like me (5/11/2007 5:37:53 AM)

I try not to take anything that's said to me on the internet too hard.But sometimes when I'm ganged up on in a thread, I feel hurt and disliked. What can I say, I'm a sub! I don't like people being vexed with me.



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