RE: lies, falsehoods and honesty

RE: lies, falsehoods and honesty (Full Version)

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Celeste43 -> RE: lies, falsehoods and honesty (5/30/2007 5:10:54 AM)
I wouldn't respond either. You want a bifem to serve you and your wife. There is zero info on her, at the very least you should link to her profile. You don't talk about what you can give a sub, you aren't even explicit enough for someone to know if you seek service, s & m, sex or whatever.

crouchingtigress -> RE: lies, falsehoods and honesty (5/30/2007 6:47:18 AM)
i find it fascinating at the amount of men and some women who find it necessary to put you in your place for whining. i thought we were evolving out of the macho, "tough it up" "boys dont cry" bullshit. personally i am ok with what does seem to me as wining. but i would invite you to see that there are many other solutions to your problem that dont involve feeling powerless, going victim and casting blame.

Faramir -> RE: lies, falsehoods and honesty (5/30/2007 8:07:52 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: crouchingtigress i thought we were evolving out of the macho, "tough it up" "boys dont cry" bullshit. Boys do cry--over truely sorrowful things. When my best friend weeps because his wife and his children are dead, and he will never change his baby girls diaper again, never see his son continue grow, when he talks to me of dream after dream of diving down into the deepest parts of the ocean to find his wife and finding keyrings and loose change in the sand, but never her, never her--I cry too. That's sorrow. What is unseemly, and shows a truely self-centered lack of regard of others, is a self-pit inspired because other people don't want to be your poly omega slave. That's disgusting. If someone came here wishing to mossierate over something truely sorrowful, a real burden, a real hardshiop, that person would have found ready ears and sympathetic hearts. Instead we have, "Wahhhhhhhh!! People that don't do just what I want are liars and false! Wahhhhhhhhh!" We forgive an over-bearing, towering egocentricity in babies and little children, because they are in the process of moving out of that state wherein their own needs are the constellations that dominate the sky. They are moving towards a place where they see others around them as just as real. What we forgive in a baby, we find shameful in a grown woman or man. The idea that "toughness" is a virtue (a crude way of talking about virtues like bearing and endurance) isn't bullshit. Keeping your cool, and bearing dissapointment is a good thing. The bullshit is what you wrote--that acting like an adult, with regard for other people's rights and choices, can be dismissed as "macho bullshit."

MellowSir -> RE: lies, falsehoods and honesty (5/30/2007 8:19:47 AM)
In a perfect world the men would as get as many hits as the women lol, equality my ass, pussy=power, simple as that unless the guy's a eunuch, just keep a sense of humor about it, even tho I've been as frustrated as the next guy, there's still humor in it :)

OsideGirl -> RE: lies, falsehoods and honesty (5/30/2007 9:17:03 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Celeste43 I wouldn't respond either. You want a bifem to serve you and your wife. There is zero info on her, at the very least you should link to her profile. You don't talk about what you can give a sub, you aren't even explicit enough for someone to know if you seek service, s & m, sex or whatever. I agree Celeste. As a submissive, I'd look at that profile and say to myself, "There's no room for me in that equation". He's getting pissy because submissives who are interested in Poly aren't reading his emails or responding. They're interested in Dom/Domme couples, after all. But, the reality is that even as a poly situation goes, that is a really convoluted one. 1) You have a Dom in love with Domme who has her own sub that the Dom doesn't play with. 2) The Dom wants his own sub and he keeps contradicting whether that sub will serve both Dom and Domme or just Dom. 3) The Domme will have influence over the Dom/sub relationship whether that sub serves the Domme or not, because the Domme is the one in a relationship with the Dom. 4) Never gives an idea of what role the suubmissive will fill, other than serve primarily me, and possibly her". I think some of the men on this site have the mentality that if you're looking and they decide that you're what they're looking for......it's a done deal. When the reality is that even though some are looking, they may not be looking for you or your situation.

MyMastersOwn -> RE: lies, falsehoods and honesty (5/30/2007 9:39:04 AM)
<fast Reply here> Just remember this...and you'll be ok... You're Damned If You...Damned If You Don't... So Dammit.. You're Are Damned.. So Dammit Just Do What You Want.... Simple.. Easy... And life moves right along.

crouchingtigress -> RE: lies, falsehoods and honesty (5/30/2007 9:49:58 AM)
Faramar, i think you make a very good point, about true sorrow, i am sorry for your friends loss and impressed at your vulnerability in sharing that story. and i liked your first post very much as well. i also thought he was having a pity party and told him so. what i was finding fascinating was human dynamics, how there is the odd sort of bullying that was going on, that seemed unconstuctive...more like picking on him and calling him names like in the school yard, rather then offering him a chance to see that he was coming from a loosing position and telling him how he could change that. i appreciated both your posts, i esp liked the "no one owes you a fucking thing" and the fact that he was making it worse by defending it, you seem to be coming from a constructive place, and your words bulged and throbbed just like you muscles...and i hope made an impression. but why do we feel the need to pick on folks when study after study show that it is non an effective way to shift behavior? when research and common sense and our own life experience tells us that folks learn better and faster in a supportive environment. i think human nature is fascinating, the jockeying for top position even on these boards is very interesting to watch, and what i ireally find interesting is how easily you can see through what a persons intention is, weather it is purely self promoting, or coming from a place of offering up the best wisdom they have ...or a medly. there are many dads that still to this day beat their sons to toughen them up, they dont know any better, i cant judge them, and when those kids grow up and beat their sons i cant judge that either, but what i can do, is to show that person how they can be much more effective at their goal of education of thier offspring into a truly great man, by other methods that they themselves might not have thought of. ....so thats what i try to do. i think that self mastery, and "bearing dissapointment and endurance" are virtues myself, and very important in becoming a solid person and a solid integris Dom, in fact i think self mastery is the pen ultimate of all virtues, and life long commitment, that you can "work out" every day and soon have a strong, toned, sexy mind that serves you and humanity in a way that the unselfmastered, flabby mind...never can.

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