Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: A question I need to ask about age play


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: A question I need to ask about age play Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 5:30:05 AM   
Copulo


Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline 		Thanks for the link Whiplashsmile, I read through the whole site and it is fairly informative. Obviously it is only one persons view but its the view of someone who is really into this and wishes for others to understand her thoughts.
I obviously read the section ‘The Difference between Paedophilia and Ageplay and just wanted to quote some of her words.
A person who is involved in age play wants an Adult partner for consensual role-playing but no doubt the possibility that a paedophile (someone with paedophilia) may well be within the community of people who are involved in age play. Paedophiles can masquerade as age players. We do not support these people and we do not knowingly have anything to do with them.
 
It’s a little confusing for outsiders to take in because how the hell do we define the genuine players from the potential paedophiles?
I mean does it matter? Obviously to some people here, NO!

I totally accept that the ‘age player’ is in a genuine fantasy about being whatever age they choose to be and I think this is absolutely harmless but I think most would be horrified if daddy told them that actually they would prefer the real thing but it was just the law that was stopping them.
I had a long chat to my daddy friend about this on the phone this morning. He very much echoed what adoracat said about protection, adoring and cherishing and how very often that can lead to sexual but he said that the primary thing for him was to feel  an overwhelming need to please and protect. I asked him if he ever imagined she was a real UM and at first he laughed and said ‘now even if I did I would not tell you that would I? but on a serious note, NO never and if I ever did fantasise about that then I would pull out of this quicker than you could say Jack Shit and go and get me some help’.



(in reply to WhiplashSmile)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 5:45:06 AM   
MadRabbit


Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Copulo

It’s a little confusing for outsiders to take in because how the hell do we define the genuine players from the potential paedophiles?
I mean does it matter? Obviously to some people here, NO!


How do you tell the difference between an ethical sadistic player and an unethical one that could be diagnosed as a possible clincal sadist?

Genuine players, to me, would be someone who only does play, and a pedophile would be someone who goes out and actually has sex with children.

The actions determine what they are and not the sexual desire or fantasy.


quote:

ORIGINAL: Copulo
I totally accept that the ‘age player’ is in a genuine fantasy about being whatever age they choose to be and I think this is absolutely harmless but I think most would be horrified if daddy told them that actually they would prefer the real thing but it was just the law that was stopping them.



This is a excerpt from Jack Rinella's Column 17 "Sado-Mastery and Maso-Submission."

"....The first two are Sadism and Masochism, wherein sexual arousal is based on pain. In our subculture the fetish itself is highly constrained by our dedication to safety and to a “good trip.” Therefore our sadomasochism is altered by such things as preparation, warm-ups, sensitivity to the reaction of the bottom, safe-words, and aftercare. This, I maintain, is a good thing.

Actual sadism, on the other hand, would hardly include any of this. Instead the sadist would just as well inflict immediate, dangerous, and even deadly pain upon the person who would in fact become a victim rather than a partner. I write this because I can confess to what my fantasy life desires, with the full knowledge that I will not do such things. Not every fantasy ought to be explored to its more hideous depths...."
 
Now...lets take a poll to see how many people into S/M would not play with a well known figure like Jack Rinella based on his revelation that he actually prefers the real thing.

 

< Message edited by MadRabbit -- 6/2/2007 5:55:07 AM >

_____________________________

Advice for New Dominants
The Unpolitically Correct Lifestyle Definitions

Obama is NOT the Messiah! He's just a VERY NAUGHTY BOY

(in reply to Copulo)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 6:03:08 AM   
Copulo


Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

quote:

ORIGINAL: Copulo

Mad Rabbit should we accept these dark desires to have sex with small UM’s?



quote:

ORIGINAL: Copulo

My concern with saying its ok to have fantasies about 6 year olds and everyone saying ‘yes why not, that’s cool’ is that giving the wrong sort a green light for go to certain predators.


Should we accept people going out and raping kids? I firmly say "No" as will most people.

Should we accept people going out and murdering people? No

Should we accept people going out and raping people? No

But where do all these forms of play stem from?

Rape play...maybe from a fantasy to be raped or to rape.
Breath play...maybe from a fantasy to be suffocated or to suffocate
Sadism...maybe from a fantasy to make people cry and inflict pain on them
Masochism...maybe from a fantasy to be hurt and to suffer...
Snuff play...maybe from a fantasy to kill or be killed.

People have the fantasies because they have desires. Without desire, there would be no fantasy and without fantasy, people wouldnt want to go out and participating in all the kind of "play".

To think that people who are into ethical sadism dont fantasize about hurting people or even...hurting people in a real non consent situation doesnt ring true to me at all. Many sadists I have talked to share these kind of fantasies with me. No more than people who are into rape play dont fantasize about actually being raped. I have sadistic tendacies and I can assure you the fantasy of "Pure Sadism" isnt one that is foreign to me.

I cerainly dont fantasize about the "play"...consentual, pre negotiated scenes where women are just pretending to be controlled by me. I fantasize and have desires about actually controlling women.

Should we past harsh judgements over these people based on fanatical views of right and wrong and say "Its wrong to have these desires!" when its been widely stated by modern psychiarists that there is no way to change a person's sexual desires?

Having desires and fealings dont make a person wrong in my eyes, because both arent subject to rationality. Actions determine whether someone is ethical or unethical. I have times when I feal like walking up to someone and punching them in the face. I have times when someone irritates me so bad I think to myself "Gee, I can just kill that person" and an image of me killing them will flash threw my brain.

You cant control how you feal or what you desire, but you can control what you do based on those actions or fealings. Sadists cant stop their fantasies and desires about hurting people and making them cry in the context of "Pure Sadism", but they find a safe and sane outlet for it in the realm of ethical sadism.

This is has nothing to do with being cool or "tolerating everyone". Nobody is encouraging that we go out and act our fantasies to the complete fullness and extreme of them.
But you can control who you play with. You can be selective. The daddy I spoke to this morning told me he was in the chat room on another site the other day when a woman piped up ‘ok guys, who wants to come over and spank my UM’s’ she was asked why she wanted that and her reply was ‘cos it turns me on’. Perhaps someone jumped at the chance, we will never know but I would of thought that 99.9% of those guys would tell her she needs help. Perhaps she didn’t mean it and was just testing the room but what signal is that giving out? clearly it was encouragement.


But this idea that we should tell them its not okay to simply have the desires and make them feal guilty for something thats not in the spectrum of human rational is false and not solving anything. All its doing is creating some a lifetime of guilt and anguish over internal wiring they cant change and doing absolutely nothing to stop them from committing the unethical acts.

Not accepting or accepting the desire will have zero impact on the desire itself if it cannot be cured by any modern psychiatric means. Finding an outlet for the desire thats ethical so it doesnt lead to unethical behavior is a solution.

Putting up a big unwelcome sign to anyone who is into age play simply because it stems from pedophilia and exiling them is only going to make them go out and find an unethical means to satisfy that desire.


And I have not said anything of the sort. I have said that I understand age play to a degree and I have said that most people into age play are doing it for the right reasons.

So...yes....we should accept people who have desires for pedophilia...just as much as we accept people who have desires and fantasies about rape, snuff, suffocation, torture, castration, branding, forced slavery and whatever dark desire the human brain can conjur.
and perhaps your right but if they do have paedophilic fantasies then they at least owe it to their partner to let them make an informed decision as to weather they want to go ahead or not.


But we shouldnt accept people who actaully go out and have sex with children, rape, kill, suffocate, torture, castrate, brand, or force people into slavery.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Copulo

We reach out to a huge audience of people and not everyone is grounded.


Then we should never talk about snuff, rape, suffocation, or sadistic desires as being okay because it might encourage people to do unethical things.

As I read your posts, this seems to be more about your personal crusade against pedophilia and not about sexual desires in a logical and scientific way.


Its not a crusade. Yes go ahead and put me down, make me look pathetic and get personal because that’s the quickest way to win this debate.
It is something that concerns me and it is something that concerns many many people I have spoken to. I am the only one that has dared to voice this.

I am a bit annoyed how it seems you arent even really reading what I am trying to say and trying to brand me as someone in support of fucking children.
But that is your assumption not mine. I never for a moment stated this about you. I have in fact read very clearly everything you have written and I have read it more than once.
I agree with you that we can not control our fantasies and therefore we can not be guilty for what we fantasise about but once this is out in the open and someone feels comfortable enough to talk with other like minded people about having such fantasies I believe and this is only MHO that we start to get onto more dodgy ground.






(in reply to MadRabbit)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 6:10:15 AM   
Copulo


Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

quote:

ORIGINAL: Copulo

It’s a little confusing for outsiders to take in because how the hell do we define the genuine players from the potential paedophiles?
I mean does it matter? Obviously to some people here, NO!


How do you tell the difference between an ethical sadistic player and an unethical one that could be diagnosed as a possible clincal sadist?
We cant! But if we could then I think the majority of us would refuse to play with a clinically diagnosed Sadist because of the psychopathic element!


Genuine players, to me, would be someone who only does play, and a pedophile would be someone who goes out and actually has sex with children.

Yes your right to a degree but I would not be prepared to have a guy in my house with my daughters that told me he had continual fantasies about someone their age

The actions determine what they are and not the sexual desire or fantasy.


quote:

ORIGINAL: Copulo
I totally accept that the ‘age player’ is in a genuine fantasy about being whatever age they choose to be and I think this is absolutely harmless but I think most would be horrified if daddy told them that actually they would prefer the real thing but it was just the law that was stopping them.



This is a excerpt from Jack Rinella's Column 17 "Sado-Mastery and Maso-Submission."

"....The first two are Sadism and Masochism, wherein sexual arousal is based on pain. In our subculture the fetish itself is highly constrained by our dedication to safety and to a “good trip.” Therefore our sadomasochism is altered by such things as preparation, warm-ups, sensitivity to the reaction of the bottom, safe-words, and aftercare. This, I maintain, is a good thing.

Actual sadism, on the other hand, would hardly include any of this. Instead the sadist would just as well inflict immediate, dangerous, and even deadly pain upon the person who would in fact become a victim rather than a partner. I write this because I can confess to what my fantasy life desires, with the full knowledge that I will not do such things. Not every fantasy ought to be explored to its more hideous depths...."
 
Now...lets take a poll to see how many people into S/M would not play with a well known figure like Jack Rinella based on his revelation that he actually prefers the real thing.

 

(in reply to MadRabbit)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 6:12:54 AM   
WhiplashSmile


Posts: 1472
Joined: 6/8/2004
Status: offline 		Copulo,
I really enjoy threads such as this because they help open up people's minds and clear up any misconceptions.  I've been wrapping my mind around Daddy/Daughter relationships and Age play a little more.  I find as I've grown older I have more of a natural Daddy side to me.  

I started off doing BDSM play activities when I was 13 years old with my Best Friend The Girl Next Door.  Actually BDSM was a natural progression from Childhood Role playing into more.. well adult kinky things without the sex.  Games we played slowly took on their own BDSM form.   Drawing turned into Body Art, Magic Tricks, Rope Escape Tricks turned into bondage, Dripping Candle wax from making kewl candle holders turned into Body Wax play.. Ummm.. so many activities that I did as a kid.. that evolved into BDSM things.  S&M activities started to come into play as well.  

Needless to say.. I can simply tap into these earlier experiences and I find a well of reliving these things out in Age play. 

Teaching my little Girl magic tricks, making candles, drawing, playing board games and everything else.. and manage to slip or transform it into BDSM play.  Just being able to mentally tap into my own experiences.. WOW..  I'm really liking this idea a lot.  WOW... 

On the flip side, I had some really awesome and interesting Experiences with a Domme.  This relationship was set in motion by a couple of friends we had in common.   Actually, they thought it would be an interesting experience trying to fix her and I up. They failed to mention to me she was a Domme and failed to mention to her I was a Dom.   Only common interests we were aware of at the time was BDSM.  We met and there was a Big Spark that went off, and it was rather interesting how we managed to naturally negotiate work everything out.  We did some interesting spins on typical scene play... things I've never done since in fact.  #Sigh!#  

I've been trying to indentify all the aspects of things I enjoyed doing in the past, along with things I have an interest in doing. Age play is something I have an interest in exploring more and doing.     

(in reply to Copulo)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 7:11:48 AM   
Copulo


Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Indemnis

Lady, everyone who has these fantasies is not going to act on them in an unhealthy way.  Just because you happened to know a pedo at one point doesn't mean every single person who has these fantasies is the same guy.  Generalise much?


Wow Im kind of knocked back by your intelligent response!!!

Did I say everyone?
Not everyone will act out but what if one does? Just one, that’s all that’s needed.

Give out one liners much do we?

(in reply to Indemnis)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 7:58:15 AM   
Faramir


Posts: 1043
Joined: 2/12/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Copulo

quote:

ORIGINAL: Indemnis

Lady, everyone who has these fantasies is not going to act on them in an unhealthy way.  Just because you happened to know a pedo at one point doesn't mean every single person who has these fantasies is the same guy.  Generalise much?


Wow Im kind of knocked back by your intelligent response!!!

Did I say everyone?
Not everyone will act out but what if one does? Just one, that’s all that’s needed.

Give out one liners much do we?



Well, you're a bigot and a hypocrite, expressing over and over again how the things you like are ok, and the things that you don't prefer are bad, and using the same standard, inconsistently applied, to do so.  Your position is shameful and ludicrous, so a bunch have pointed it out carefully and thoughtfully--Indemnis just tossed out a great one liner that sums up how silly your generalizations are.

A different rhetorical approach, but just as valid.

Obviously you are not going to let go of your cherished bigotry, and will continue to defend it again and again by saying essentially "Nuh-uh!"  So have fun being a sick, twisted person who has dangerous fantasies.  Hopefully you'll end up in an institution someday!

PS Actually, lots and lots and lots of girls crave breath play from me, perhaps because I have snuff fantasies.  So what you said there was pretty damn stupid and idiotic.
Like it or not thats the facts




_____________________________

True masters, true subs and slaves, X many years in the lifestyle, Old Guard this and High Protocol that--it's like a convention of D&D nerds were allowed to have sex once, and they decided to make a religion out of it.

(in reply to Copulo)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 8:11:05 AM   
darkinshadows


Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline
What would the thought be about women and men who have this fantasy as the child/that they are the child and so a dominant  'acts out' the scenario for them -  Does this make them paedophiles in yours/peoples eyes?  It isn't always the people giving, it is the receiving also, but sofar the postings seem very centred on the behaviour of male dominants who have this as a fetish on females. (I am not trying to divert or hijack the thread - it seems to be relevant IMO)
 
Peace
 
(edit because my typos SUCK today)


< Message edited by darkinshadows -- 6/2/2007 8:12:06 AM >

_____________________________
.dark.



...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to Copulo)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 8:22:35 AM   
Elorin


Posts: 970
Joined: 8/22/2004
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit
This is a excerpt from Jack Rinella's Column 17 "Sado-Mastery and Maso-Submission."

"....The first two are Sadism and Masochism, wherein sexual arousal is based on pain. In our subculture the fetish itself is highly constrained by our dedication to safety and to a “good trip.” Therefore our sadomasochism is altered by such things as preparation, warm-ups, sensitivity to the reaction of the bottom, safe-words, and aftercare. This, I maintain, is a good thing.

Actual sadism, on the other hand, would hardly include any of this. Instead the sadist would just as well inflict immediate, dangerous, and even deadly pain upon the person who would in fact become a victim rather than a partner. I write this because I can confess to what my fantasy life desires, with the full knowledge that I will not do such things. Not every fantasy ought to be explored to its more hideous depths...."
 
Now...lets take a poll to see how many people into S/M would not play with a well known figure like Jack Rinella based on his revelation that he actually prefers the real thing.


Jack didn't say he prefers the "real thing"." Jack said he can confess his fantasy life desires. He fantasizes about the real thing...with the full knowledge that [he] will not do such things.

_____________________________

'cause when i look down /i just miss all the good stuff / when i look up / i just trip over things

(in reply to MadRabbit)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 9:17:16 AM   
Copulo


Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: darkinshadows

What would the thought be about women and men who have this fantasy as the child/that they are the child and so a dominant  'acts out' the scenario for them -  Does this make them paedophiles in yours/peoples eyes?  It isn't always the people giving, it is the receiving also, but sofar the postings seem very centred on the behaviour of male dominants who have this as a fetish on females. (I am not trying to divert or hijack the thread - it seems to be relevant IMO)
 
Peace
 
(edit because my typos SUCK today)



Why would it? If an adult fantasises about being abused by her/his daddy then I would call it an incestuous fantasy more than anything else. If I was to fantasise about being an UM and having sex with an adult then I would not in any way be having paedophilic thoughts.
If I were a man or woman for that matter having sex with someone who was in their own head an Um and I was roleplaying a part with them then surely I am an age player
but if I were a man/woman that was having sex with someone who was in their own head an UM so that I could get as near to my rl fantasy of having sex with an UM then I would question where my heads at.

(in reply to darkinshadows)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 9:48:36 AM   
MadRabbit


Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Elorin

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit
This is a excerpt from Jack Rinella's Column 17 "Sado-Mastery and Maso-Submission."

"....The first two are Sadism and Masochism, wherein sexual arousal is based on pain. In our subculture the fetish itself is highly constrained by our dedication to safety and to a “good trip.” Therefore our sadomasochism is altered by such things as preparation, warm-ups, sensitivity to the reaction of the bottom, safe-words, and aftercare. This, I maintain, is a good thing.

Actual sadism, on the other hand, would hardly include any of this. Instead the sadist would just as well inflict immediate, dangerous, and even deadly pain upon the person who would in fact become a victim rather than a partner. I write this because I can confess to what my fantasy life desires, with the full knowledge that I will not do such things. Not every fantasy ought to be explored to its more hideous depths...."
 
Now...lets take a poll to see how many people into S/M would not play with a well known figure like Jack Rinella based on his revelation that he actually prefers the real thing.


Jack didn't say he prefers the "real thing"." Jack said he can confess his fantasy life desires. He fantasizes about the real thing...with the full knowledge that [he] will not do such things.


Thats fair enough and very true, but this began with people who just have the desires and fantasies and drifted over to people who actually want to go out and do it. I just want able to keep up with who we are debating about at that point.

_____________________________

Advice for New Dominants
The Unpolitically Correct Lifestyle Definitions

Obama is NOT the Messiah! He's just a VERY NAUGHTY BOY

(in reply to Elorin)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 10:05:45 AM   
salilus


Posts: 201
Joined: 5/18/2007
Status: offline 		Sometimes, a person may have been abused when they were a child and age playing as an adult helps them work through it. I don't really understand how that works because I wasn't abused.

I didn't have a childhood. I didn't get to have friends and play with toys. My mother didn't like children so I was never allowed to act like one.

I've recently developed this theory (with regards to myself only), that because I didn't have a childhood, I didn't learn a lot of the things most people do when they're a kid. For instance, I learned at a very early age to feel responsible and guilty for a lot of things that really shouldn't have been laid on me. When I am 'little' with my Daddy, however, I'm learning not to feel guilty for things (I am responsible for stuff - the things he allows). And learning not to feel guilty when I'm little, seems to be helping me in the adult areas of my life (work). I'm more balanced and focused and I feel less stressed when things don't go as planned.

So, in having a 'second childhood' with my Daddy and having it become a very GOOD childhood, I'm becoming a healthier adult.

This was never my intention. I just happened to realise it recently.

There are reasons that we do the things we do. Sometimes, they are the right reasons, sometimes they are not.

(in reply to Copulo)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 10:37:32 AM   
maisyjayne


Posts: 8
Joined: 9/27/2006
Status: offline 		A very interesting thread, sadly hijacked by people who would like to sling personal insults, I feel a very valuable question was asked earlier on which didn't get answered, it would give us a little insight into a way of thinking, Faramir I wonder if you might do us all the honour of answering  me this, When playing with your girl what exactly was it that made you insanely hot??  maybe Im not reading your post in the way you intended! but I don't feel this explained to us whether you got hot over what happened to her or you got hot over helping her with this fantasy. I think these are two very different things.

(in reply to MadRabbit)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 11:10:01 AM   
CitizenCane


Posts: 349
Joined: 3/11/2005
Status: offline 		I'm just going to take a moment to try to outline some distinctions that I think might be useful here. It seems to me that there are at least three very different things that are being conflated in this discussion:
1) Age Play- in which consenting adults, aware that they themselves, and their partners, are adults, adopt some child-like behaviours with or without a sexual component.
2) Paedophilia- in which adults sexually exploit people they know to be children BECAUSE they are children.
3) Individuals with traumatic dissociation whose 'child selves' manifest as self-percieved children, but may be perceived by their partners as simple Age Players.

Some of the concern that people feel about the first category is that it may mask the second two categories, both of which are connected to child abuse.  This strikes me as legitimate concern, but not as a reason to condemen age play. Obviously, BDSM can mask sociopathy, and people should be appropriately careful in choosing their partners.  In either case, one needs to observe the real dynamics of an individual to assess whether they are a dangerous, mentally ill criminal-in-the-making, or just someone exploring different areas of sexual/emotional satisfaction.

Although I don't have much background in this particular subject, I would think it generally preferable for someone with paedophilic tendencies to displace them into age play than to simply suppress them- suppression doesn't seem to be an effective 'treatment'. The key would be having a partner who is a reasonably healthy adult, and not one that ends up enabling actual child molesting.

My own concern with the last category is that simply replaying scenes of their own molestation or rape as children does not aid in the healing of people with traumatic dissociation, and often adds to their problems.  While a 'daddy' having sex with an adult 'little girl' is not really molesting her, in the case of the deeply dissociative, it may well appear that way to the 'child'.  This is unlikely to do either individual or their relationship any good.  While these are issues that people suffering from traumatic dissociation must confront in order to heal, it's important that they happen in a broader context of therapy and support.


(in reply to maisyjayne)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 11:22:35 AM   
darkinshadows


Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Copulo

quote:

ORIGINAL: darkinshadows

What would the thought be about women and men who have this fantasy as the child/that they are the child and so a dominant  'acts out' the scenario for them -  Does this make them paedophiles in yours/peoples eyes?  It isn't always the people giving, it is the receiving also, but sofar the postings seem very centred on the behaviour of male dominants who have this as a fetish on females. (I am not trying to divert or hijack the thread - it seems to be relevant IMO)
 
Peace
 
(edit because my typos SUCK today)



Why would it? If an adult fantasises about being abused by her/his daddy then I would call it an incestuous fantasy more than anything else. If I was to fantasise about being an UM and having sex with an adult then I would not in any way be having paedophilic thoughts.
If I were a man or woman for that matter having sex with someone who was in their own head an Um and I was roleplaying a part with them then surely I am an age player
but if I were a man/woman that was having sex with someone who was in their own head an UM so that I could get as near to my rl fantasy of having sex with an UM then I would question where my heads at.


I didn't mention abuse and didnt specifically mention daddy/mummy roles - just any little/adult/age fantasy play.
I don't really see ageplay as defined specifically as incest play either unless the 'child' is the viewing the 'adult' and/or visa versa as their parent and not all relationships of the Daddy/girl/mummy/boy are so inclined.
(example - I call my Boy 'my Boy', but he isn't my Boy - it is a term of endearment.)
 
I was thinking more of your last scenario - I just wondered why people see the 'adult' fantasisng as a paedophile and not so much the 'child' - but rather - question the 'childs' intent/head?
 
Peace


_____________________________
.dark.



...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to Copulo)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 11:35:39 AM   
Copulo


Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: darkinshadows

I didn't mention abuse and didnt specifically mention daddy/mummy roles - just any little/adult/age fantasy play.
I don't really see ageplay as defined specifically as incest play either unless the 'child' is the viewing the 'adult' and/or visa versa as their parent and not all relationships of the Daddy/girl/mummy/boy are so inclined.
(example - I call my Boy 'my Boy', but he isn't my Boy - it is a term of endearment.)
 
I was thinking more of your last scenario - I just wondered why people see the 'adult' fantasisng as a paedophile and not so much the 'child' - but rather - question the 'childs' intent/head?
 
Peace



I think if an adult was abused as an UM or was just made to grow up too quickly as someone here pointed out, then its probably very natural to have a fantasy role as an UM. Its playing out what perhaps they felt they missed out on. It’s a safe place to be.


(in reply to darkinshadows)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 11:52:29 AM   
Copulo


Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline 		Thank you CitizenCane I think you make a good point here and one that is perhaps debatable and worth food for thought.
Like you I think there are many thousands of age players that are doing this with good intention but unfortunately there is a minority that are not.
The whole point of my post was perhaps to talk about that small minority but it seems that certain people have become highly offended and even to an extent lost all control of good reasoning.
If I could have a doughnut for every person that has uttered the words ‘age play is sick’ I would weigh 500 lbs. I don’t ever agree with those people and hopefully I try to educate them into being more tolerant into believing that 95% of the time its just consensual adult fun but like yourself I feel there is a shadow ( a small minority) that have a recognized medical condition.

(in reply to Copulo)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 11:55:52 AM   
WhiplashSmile


Posts: 1472
Joined: 6/8/2004
Status: offline 		Since this is a heated subject, I thought I see if I could find any resources of worthy value on the internet. 
After all this subject has probally been beat to death by others before us. Right?

Here's an interesting read that breaks Age Play down into different categories..
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ageplay

There are basically two types of Ageplay
1. Regressive ageplay
2. Sexual Ageplay

I think many people have been having a bitch of a time seperating the two from each other in the message boards here.


Here's the breakdown
  • Regressive ageplay
    • Reparenting
    • Ageplay roles
      • Infantilism 
      • Juvenilism
      • Adolescentism
      • Guardianship  

    • Inner child therapy

  • Sexual ageplay

Sexual Ageplay, the area of great concern and heated debate is classified as a form of edgeplay.  Note that Adolescentism is most common role for Sexual Ageplay.  Many because it involves fantasies with teenagers (ages 13+).   

When it comes to ageplay, it's apparent that there are a number of reasons why people become involved it in.  I think people should be aware of the motivations and roles when talking about age play with prospective partners.

When it comes to sexual age play it's apparent the Ageplay role has a major impact.  There's a big difference between living out fantasies of having sex a 16 year verses a 6 year old let alone fantasies involving sex with a toddler,  yikes talk about edgeplay.

Regressive ageplay is clearly not about sex.  It's about simply being a child again.

Here's this link again, I think this might help clear a few things up...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ageplay




(in reply to Copulo)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 2:49:07 PM   
Faramir


Posts: 1043
Joined: 2/12/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: maisyjayne
Faramir I wonder if you might do us all the honour of answering  me this, When playing with your girl what exactly was it that made you insanely hot??  maybe Im not reading your post in the way you intended! but I don't feel this explained to us whether you got hot over what happened to her or you got hot over helping her with this fantasy. I think these are two very different things.


What happened to her didn't arouse me--it made me sad, angry and wish somehow I could help her.  I wept for the child she was, for the harm she suffered, and even more than the abuse, the silencing her family did to keep that abuse secret.  That struck me as even more sinful and more damaging than the abuse itself.

What was hot was our interaction, her response to me.  When I screamed at her, knocked her around the room, she responded with a sexual frenzy and devoted compliance that touched my sexuality exactly and perfectly in the right spot.  Not close, not sorta, but right where I am.  When I grabbed her by the throat, yanked this lithe young dancer in the air and slammed her against the wall, jammed my hand under her school skirt and found her "knickers" soaked, saw in her eyes complete acquiesence, I was on fire in response.  For most of the night she was shaking in terror and lust, sick with a desire to be good for me, fuck back, suck, spread her cheeks fo rme, do anything.  That incredible, compliant and sexualized response makes me catch on fire also.

I don't even know what that was--it wasn't ageplay.  My ageplay, what I fantasize about, and have role-played with partners, is she's my 17 year old daughter, sexual and in love with Daddy, so hot for her Daddy she fantasizes about his cock at school and masturbates in the bathroom stalls thinking about what it would be like to please him.  Totally hakneyed but man that works for me.

What I did with this girl was more like rape-play than age-play to me, although she was clearly in a little space.

The bottom line for me here is that Copulo is full of crap, making this arbitrary distiction between a kink she doesn't have and kink's she has.  I do fantasize a lot about teenage girls--that does not make me a rapist.  Two nights ago an"18" year old girl contacted me here at CM, we chatted for a while, turns out she's 16.  I'm not a rapist, and since a 16 year old girl can't give consent, that was the end of our conversation.

You know what the punchline is?  I looked at her profile today--she's owned now with a Master.  I wonder if he is as open as I am about ageplay?  Or did she decide to lie?

_____________________________

True masters, true subs and slaves, X many years in the lifestyle, Old Guard this and High Protocol that--it's like a convention of D&D nerds were allowed to have sex once, and they decided to make a religion out of it.

(in reply to maisyjayne)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: A question I need to ask about age play - 6/2/2007 4:51:19 PM   
Copulo


Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline 		Thanks for the links Whiplashsmile. The thread is in fact only getting heated by one person and Im ignoring him because I can only debate with people that can remain in control. Anger and spitting venom never helps anyone and unfortunately puts other people off from posting their view.

I can understand all these categories, especially regressive. For someone who has been through abuse then shadow play can be very therapeutic if done with the right person.

If we are unfortunate enough to have a nonse as a father then we Will Suffer and the pendulum will swing in many directions as to the sort of therapy one needs to get on with their lives. Some will choose the route of age play (and by no means am I saying that all age players were abused) whilst others will choose other routes. All is good if done with understanding and a sane mind.


(in reply to Faramir)
Profile   Post #: 60
Page:   <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: A question I need to ask about age play Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.109