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ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

Well Level, it seems that a lot of people have no problem with it, but they have not been on the receiving end of it ... yet. That is the problem with people that out others and think that they are doing something noble even, they are loose cannons and the next person they may righteously believe needs outing is their neighbor, me, or even you....and it isn't kosher.

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ORIGINAL: Aileen68

Mmmmm...Satan's hot.  That tail.  That trident.
I'd meet him in a hotel room for a meet and beat.

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ORIGINAL: Aileen68

Yeah, but then who do you blame when you fuck up?

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ORIGINAL: domiguy

To all of you who have chimed in support.....Do you really think it is appropriate behavior to have your partner recieve a massage from someone that they have flirted with especially if this massage is not given in your presence?

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ORIGINAL: Sinergy

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ORIGINAL: domiguy

To all of you who have chimed in support.....Do you really think it is appropriate behavior to have your partner recieve a massage from someone that they have flirted with especially if this massage is not given in your presence?

It is a question of trust, really.  I would wonder "Do I trust my partner enough to let this happen?"

Probably, but then most of the women I know are fully capable of setting excellent and clear boundaries and backing them up with a tremendous, almost brutal, ass-kicking of the transgressor if their boundaries are not respected.  When I say brutal, I mean flattened testicles and smashed facial bones.  This is not about technique, really, it is about going into the fight with the same attitude a cat has when it doesnt want that bath.  It goes tasmanian devil trying to defend itself.

If it ends up being something the two got into consensually, that is a whole different kettle of fish, and standing all Domly on my soapbox ranting about how wrong it is will not stop my partner from running off and bumping uglies with this other person.

I am not sure I am chiming in my support.  Was there an aspect of consensuality about it, or did you set a clear boundary that was stepped on by some abusive jackass?  If it was the former, I imagine it is time to take a long hard look at the OPs own behavior and figure out a way to not get in this position again.  If it was the latter, look me up on the other side and I will recommend where to go to learn how to deliver brutal ass-kickings of abusive assholes.

Just me, etc.

Sinergy

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ORIGINAL: domiguy

My dearest Sinergy,

First off, I don't believe that I stood on a "domly soapbox".....If I did come across in that manner than I hoped I appeared magnificent!!!...Nonetheless, when the op suggested the fact that there was to be a massage performed...I recalled the scene from Pulp Fiction....Not because it is funny,which it is, but that it held relevance to the conversation.

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ORIGINAL: domiguy

For a tit shot or two.

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ORIGINAL: HutchGarahl

Well, first off....there's nothing wrong with getting a massage from anyone be it a friend or whoever.

Now..crossing lines. You told this friend the guidelines....you say he crossed them..can I ask just what it was he did? Like did he touch your Sensative places as you call them? I'm just curious as to what exactly it was that he did to cross a line Cause to tell ya the truth hun....unless you open your legs, he ain't gonna touch unless he forced ya and then that's called rape. He supposed to be massaging your back right? Therefore no need to go anywhere else.

Ok, so now you say you removed yourself...so how is it he crossed another line? So he sent a mail saying you are turned on...it's words on a computer. Did you get turned on? The answer to this problem is simple...take him off your list and don't respond to him. And no matter what it was....a real friend would never overstep boundries given.

Sorry if i'm sounding harsh...but maybe you need to stop and take a look at the fact of you being a flirt as you say...might be the cause of this guy going over boundries. While overstepping one's boundries is wrong, I will agree...but if someone is gonna flirt so much, then they best expect the other to return the favor.

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ORIGINAL: domiguy
Didn't anyone ever see Pulp Fiction?

Jules: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa... stop right there. Eatin' a bitch out, and givin' a bitch a foot massage ain't even the same fuckin' thing.
Vincent: It's not. It's the same ballpark.
Jules: Ain't no fuckin' ballpark neither. Now look, maybe your method of massage differs from mine, but, you know, touchin' his wife's feet, and stickin' your tongue in her Holiest of Holies, ain't the same fuckin' ballpark, it ain't the same league, it ain't even the same fuckin' sport. Look, foot massages don't mean shit.
Vincent: Have you ever given a foot massage?
Jules: [scoffs] Don't be tellin' me about foot massages. I'm the foot fuckin' master.
Vincent: Given a lot of 'em?
Jules: Shit yeah. I got my technique down and everything, I don't be ticklin' or nothin'.
Vincent: Would you give a guy a foot massage?
[Jules gives Vincent a long look, realizing he's been set up]
Jules: Fuck you.
Vincent: You give them a lot?
Jules: Fuck you.
Vincent: You know, I'm getting kinda tired. I could use a foot massage myself.
Jules: Man, you best back off, I'm gittin' a little pissed here
Jules: Look, just because I don't be givin' no man a foot massage don't make it right for Marsellus to throw Antwan into a glass motherfuckin' house fuckin' up the way the nigger talks. Motherfucker do that shit to me, he better paralyze my ass cuz I'll kill the motherfucker, know what I'm sayin'?
Vincent: I ain't saying it's right. But you're saying a foot massage don't mean nothing, and I'm saying it does. Now look, I've given a million ladies a million foot massages, and they all meant something. We act like they don't, but they do, and that's what's so fucking cool about them. There's a sensuous thing going on where you don't talk about it, but you know it, she knows it, fucking Marsellus knew it, and Antwan should have fucking better known better. I mean, that's his fucking wife, man. He can't be expected to have a sense of humor about that shit. You know what I'm saying?
Jules: That's an interesting point. Come on, let's get into character.

A massage is never harmless when given by someone you are not paying or have never fucked.