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All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 8:44:18 AM

DominantJim

Posts: 43
Joined: 6/28/2007
Status: offline

Through my short travels here I've decided that the best way to find out about submissive women is to ask the dominant ones. Most of the submissive women are owned and seem to be either reluctant to give answers because of this, OR are bitchy as hell because they are owned and seem to feel that they don't need to show respect for other masters (mostly switches). So in order to attain an untainted answer I'm coming to you wonderful ladies. My question is what should I do to make myself irrisistable to the women on a site like this where most men abuse the system just to get laid. I am sincere in my quest to find a woman or women for me.

Post #: 1

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 10:20:44 AM

MstrssPassion

Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline

I took a look at your profile:

"A discreet Dominant Male, looking for a Submissive female or females to use."

discreet often translates to married &/or it refers to someone who is apprehensive... neither are favorable, you might want to find a better way to describe yourself. oh, & lose the "use"... this isn't going to win you any points.

"I am purely a sexual Dom/Master, looking for a female who is willing to service me in any way and be obedient."

This tends to sing out that your are looking for purely kinky sex hook-ups & most women don't respond well to being considered nothing more than damp places to park a penis, especially when they are told they will have to relocate to get laid. Most any woman can head to a corner pub in her local neighborhood & find sex. This passage also reads like you are very selfish/self serving (as well as the one above where you tell women you wish to use them)... maybe at your age you haven't quite learned that women respond better when they know they are desired, worthy & amount to more than a fuck. Those who are an easy fuck tend to be the ones that men will lose interest on shortly after the act. If you are going to send out hints that "Possibly carry on to something more stable" then you need to find a more sincere ways to express this. All I'm feeling from your words is that you are looking for no-strings, kinky sex, your way & that comes to you so you aren't bothered with details or travel.

"PS That is not my child I have none and am single."

You are not going to get a picture approved that includes a child in it. This is an adult site, even the mention of children (aka: unmentionables) is against Terms Of Service. Even if you did get the pic approved, it is not cool to have to explain the presence of unnecessary people in a single person's profile photo. The presence of a child is no different than the presence of female relative... though innocent, it would require explanation & most women don't want to be bothered with an explanation. Too often guys will crop out the woman in a photo & you will see the flip of her hair or his chopped off arm in what was once an embrace... doesn't translate well & often leads one to believe the person is attached rather than single. My best suggestion, get good picture of yourself, alone, in your typical everyday attire & smile nicely. Don't stage the pic & don't put it on too thick... just be natural.

_____________________________

MstrssPassion

(in reply to DominantJim)

Post #: 2

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 10:21:27 AM

MsCameron

Posts: 238
Joined: 10/14/2004
From: Ontario, Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DominantJim

Through my short travels here I've decided that the best way to find out about submissive women is to ask the dominant ones. Most of the submissive women are owned and seem to be either reluctant to give answers because of this, OR are bitchy as hell because they are owned and seem to feel that they don't need to show respect for other masters (mostly switches).

Huh??? You've been here what??..all of two days???

Maybe you should be posting this under the "ask a submissive" forum? Maybe you should be reading profiles from male dominants?

What do you think would happen if I asked male dominants what whould make me irresistible to a male sub? Or a sissy maid?

As far as submissives not showing respect to other Masters(?) mostly switches (?) I haven't a clue what your talking about. What are you saying? That most Masters are switches?

In my travels, which have been long, most respectful approaches are met with respectful answers.
Then there are those that would cheerfully smack you into next week no matter what.

Nobody is automatically due respect just because they've deemed themselves an almighty dominant.

Copied from your profile
I am purely a sexual Dom/Master, looking for a female who is willing to service me in any way and be obedient. Possibly carry on to something more stable, but still a Master/Slave relationship.

But you're not here to get laid? What does that mean? Sex and obedience first, possible stable relationship later?

MC

Edited for spelling.. and a high 5 to MstrssPassion :)

< Message edited by MsCameron -- 6/30/2007 10:26:56 AM >

_____________________________

I'm reaching for the random or what ever will bewilder me.
And following our will and wind we may just go where no one's been.
We'll ride the spiral to the end and may just go where no one's been.
Spiral out. Keep going, going...
Lateralis.Tool

(in reply to DominantJim)

Post #: 3

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 10:24:19 AM

MsKatHouston

Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline

First you have an uphill battle because most women on this site, dominant or submissive, are quite jaded because of all the HNG's who send us mail. That being said, when contacting someone for the first time, showing sincerity, tact and a big dose of manners will get you far. Be up front and honest in your profile. Be polite. Read the profiles that interest you fully and write to the individual. Do not write mass emails. Personalize a first email. Tell the lady why you were attracted to her profile. Do not concentrate on the sexual or scene aspects but moreso on the woman herself. Tell what you have to offer.

Second, there is no such thing as irresistable. You will have qualities that appeal to some, not others. So, make sure you are not setting unrealistic expectations for yourself. You will not be irresistable. Go into this knowing that.

Next, take "rejection" gracefully. A no reply from a woman should be taken as a "no". Move on. A bitchy response is also a "no". Move on. Understand that nobody owes you anything. It would be nice to get some common courtesy but the fact of the matter is, you will not always get it. Just accept that not everyone will be warm and fuzzy or even polite. Move on.

Regarding your profile, I do see some issues that may hamper your progress. First, you state clearly that you are not into any pain aspects and are primarily looking for the sexual. Is that it? What about control? This would be a first red flag to me as a woman because, frankly, women can get laid with just about anyone. Many here are looking for a little more. See if you can expand on the other aspects in your profile so it does not seem like you are looking for just kinky sex. If that really is all you are looking for, you might have a harder time finding a compatible partner. Not impossible, mind you but more difficult.

quote:

PS That is not my child I have none and am single.

What is this about? Do you have a pic in your profile that has a child? If so, remove it. You probably do not have permission to have posted that in the first place and no parent would want a pic of their child on an adult site such as this. Crop the photo if you need to but make sure you do not have anyone underage in there. I also think this is against the TOS.

Good luck.

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to DominantJim)

Post #: 4

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 11:15:58 AM

imthatacheyouhav

Posts: 1259
Joined: 4/16/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsKatHouston

First you have an uphill battle because most women on this site, dominant or submissive, are quite jaded because of all the HNG's who send us mail. That being said, when contacting someone for the first time, showing sincerity, tact and a big dose of manners will get you far. Be up front and honest in your profile. Be polite. Read the profiles that interest you fully and write to the individual. Do not write mass emails. Personalize a first email. Tell the lady why you were attracted to her profile. Do not concentrate on the sexual or scene aspects but moreso on the woman herself. Tell what you have to offer.

Second, there is no such thing as irresistable. You will have qualities that appeal to some, not others. So, make sure you are not setting unrealistic expectations for yourself. You will not be irresistable. Go into this knowing that.

Next, take "rejection" gracefully. A no reply from a woman should be taken as a "no". Move on. A bitchy response is also a "no". Move on. Understand that nobody owes you anything. It would be nice to get some common courtesy but the fact of the matter is, you will not always get it. Just accept that not everyone will be warm and fuzzy or even polite. Move on.

Regarding your profile, I do see some issues that may hamper your progress. First, you state clearly that you are not into any pain aspects and are primarily looking for the sexual. Is that it? What about control? This would be a first red flag to me as a woman because, frankly, women can get laid with just about anyone. Many here are looking for a little more. See if you can expand on the other aspects in your profile so it does not seem like you are looking for just kinky sex. If that really is all you are looking for, you might have a harder time finding a compatible partner. Not impossible, mind you but more difficult.

quote:

PS That is not my child I have none and am single.

What is this about? Do you have a pic in your profile that has a child? If so, remove it. You probably do not have permission to have posted that in the first place and no parent would want a pic of their child on an adult site such as this. Crop the photo if you need to but make sure you do not have anyone underage in there. I also think this is against the TOS.

Good luck.

Ladies and Gentlemen...you have just seen the perfect response to this OP....holy shit....

_____________________________

*if you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything*
**collared July 22 2007 by LordKen**

(in reply to MsKatHouston)

Post #: 5

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 11:52:08 AM

CutieMouse

Posts: 81
Status: offline

Your profile reads as if you are looking to have an affair- which is rarely a desireable option for a woman, given that it means getting the leftover dregs of the girlfriend/spouse. I also agree with the ladies above, who feel the term "use" is a bit distasteful. I don't even read the profile as being that of a kinky sensualist/dominant man (which you very well may be), as much as that of a mid-20s guy looking for easy sex.

It might also help to realize that your disinterests will weed out some of the submissive gene pool- those who are interested in masochism, medical play, etc- as you have no interest in such things. Actually, weeding those candidates out early on is a good thing.

The whole concept of seeking someone who will serve you sexually and do anything you ask is lovely and everyone has a right to their needs, wants, and desires; however, what exactly do you have to give in exchange for such wild and abandonded devotion? Overall the profile strikes me as being not as sketchy as some of the less fortunate ones I've come across (points for that), but still somewhat empty given that you are apparently open to the idea of a LTR/relocation is an option, etc.

(in reply to imthatacheyouhav)

Post #: 6

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 11:52:49 AM

MsCameron

Posts: 238
Joined: 10/14/2004
From: Ontario, Canada
Status: offline

Agreed, it was very good.

I'd edit my own again if I could.. Boy, am I crabby today :(

MC

_____________________________

I'm reaching for the random or what ever will bewilder me.
And following our will and wind we may just go where no one's been.
We'll ride the spiral to the end and may just go where no one's been.
Spiral out. Keep going, going...
Lateralis.Tool

(in reply to imthatacheyouhav)

Post #: 7

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 11:57:25 AM

MsSonnetMarwood

Posts: 1898
Joined: 2/10/2005
From: Eastern Shore, Maryland
Status: offline

If you don't want to come across as one of the HNG masses online that are just looking to get laid any way they can.....then don't act like it.

Thus far, you're not doing so well at that.

_____________________________

~Ms. Sonnet Marwood~

Deja Moo: The feeling you've heard this bull somewhere before.

(in reply to MsCameron)

Post #: 8

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 12:44:03 PM

SDFemDom4cuck

Posts: 2809
Joined: 5/23/2005
From: P'burgh PA
Status: offline

I'm still a little confused as to how asking Dominant Women will help to make him irresistible to submissives? Perhaps I'm just having a Blonde day today.

quote:

Throughout my short travels (time) here, I've decided that the best way to find out about submissive women is to ask the Dominant ones. Most of the submissive women are owned and seem to be either reluctant to give answers because of this; OR (caps are unneccesary) they are bitchy as hell because they are owned (redundant) and seem to feel that they don't need to show respect for other masters. (or they are mostly switches). Not to assume anything but I think that is the point you were attempting to make in regard to submissive switches. I was a bit confused there. So in order to attain (obtain) an untainted answer; I'm coming to you wonderful ladies.

(Paragraph break)My question is what should I do to make myself irrisistable (irresistible)to the women on a site like this where most of the men abuse the system just to get laid.? I am sincere in my quest to find a (the) woman or women for me.

The above is written with the intent of being helpful. I will say that spell check and the use of proper grammar and punctuation are always our friends. They help a great deal in making a good first impression. Ok, I'm also a spelling and grammar Nazi, I admit it.

PS. Respect isn't something that is implied or automatic simply because one slaps on a label of being Dominant.

< Message edited by SDFemDom4cuck -- 6/30/2007 12:45:38 PM >

_____________________________

Ms Jo

She dealt her pretty words like Blades -
How glittering they shone -
And every One unbared a Nerve
Or wantoned with a Bone -

I want a sensitive man - one who'll cry when I hit him.

(in reply to DominantJim)

Post #: 9

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 1:06:01 PM

littlesarbonn

Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsSonnetMarwood

If you don't want to come across as one of the HNG masses online that are just looking to get laid any way they can.....then don't act like it.

Thus far, you're not doing so well at that.

This leaves me confused. What about those of us who are HNG masses online that are just looking to get laid in any way we can? I feel so discriminated against.

_____________________________

<---- FYI, this picture looks JUST like me

http://www.littlesarbonn.com/Stickman/Stickman.htm
The Adventures of Stickman and the Unemployed Lego Spaceman

(in reply to MsSonnetMarwood)

Post #: 10

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 1:09:08 PM

slaveluci

Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DominantJim
Through my short travels here I've decided that the best way to find out about submissive women is to ask the dominant ones

quote:

Most of the submissive women are owned and seem to be either reluctant to give answers because of this, OR are bitchy as hell because they are owned and seem to feel that they don't need to show respect for other masters (mostly switches)

quote:

So in order to attain an untainted answer I'm coming to you wonderful ladies. My question is what should I do to make myself irrisistable to the women on a site like this where most men abuse the system just to get laid. I am sincere in my quest to find a woman or women for me.

Well, you may need to take this with a grain of salt as I am one of those "bitchy as hell" "owned" ones with no respect

but I would suggest that one way to make yourself "irresistable" would be to NOT make such broad, incorrect assumptions about all women. First of all, asking dominant women to find out about submissive ones doesn't make a whole lot of sense. It wouldn't make much sense to ask me how dominant women think, that's for sure. Secondly, women who are owned and don't bow down to other doms are probably doing what they are told and expected to do by their OWN doms/masters. I know that's the case for me. If I started deferring and submitting to any other one, I'd be in serious trouble. Lastly, though my answer may be "tainted" as I'm owned and not dominant, let me circle back to what I said above. Appealing to women here just might require you to stop assuming that all dominant women think alike or that all submissive women do either. That is sooooooooo not the case

............slave luci

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to DominantJim)

Post #: 11

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 1:13:51 PM

Grlwithboy

Posts: 655
Joined: 2/8/2005
Status: offline

didn't you get the girl memo?

And if anyone figures out the secret of femsub irresistability please pass it along to me, too, thanks in advance. I thought the perfume I have on would do it.

(in reply to slaveluci)

Post #: 12

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 1:22:41 PM

MsKatHouston

Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline

quote:

First of all, asking dominant women to find out about submissive ones doesn't make a whole lot of sense. It wouldn't make much sense to ask me how dominant women think, that's for sure.

Yes, I was rather curious about this one myself.

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to slaveluci)

Post #: 13

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 1:22:54 PM

sambamanslilgirl

Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline

to answer your question - your profile was a major turn off for me after viewing you when you viewed mine (i must have been one of those bitchy owned submissives you're whining about) - it screamed only here looking for kinky sex no matter how sincere you made it to be.

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...

...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to DominantJim)

Post #: 14

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 1:29:11 PM

Lockit

Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline

Ok... I am going to try to tread lightly here because of my huge mess last night... time out for Lockit... but I do have something to say to you DominantJim. What I did last night is not your fault in any way. I stepped into that myself and I will pay the price. I confused you with someone else... as frustrating as you are... but not as sexually insulting as you are. He caught my wrath at you.

I found your posts from yesterday offensive... and troll like. I have been frustrated in my personal life with many things and I was escaping here on the boards... my problem... should have kept my mouth shut... but since you are here again... back at it... insulting and pointing fingers... I have to say something.

You have been tagged... you are clearly showing exactly what you are and I am so glad I didn't have to say it... but since I blamed another man for your actions... I just figured I better let you know how pissed I was at your postings. I will leave it at that.

I am at fault for responding period and maybe shouldn't be doing this one... but I think you get my award of a troll with attitude. As for what I am.... lol... we shall see what I am called and such in the aftermath of last night. lol I stand ready to face the music... but damn you all have to admit... when I f up... I do it well!

(in reply to Grlwithboy)

Post #: 15

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 2:20:42 PM

Politesub53

Posts: 14862
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline

So is it just male submissives that are irresistible then ?

Smirks very sweetly

(in reply to Lockit)

Post #: 16

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 3:02:26 PM

MagiksSlave

Posts: 2768
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline

I am a sub so maybe this will sound "bitchy" but there is no way to be irresistable, there will always be those that find you very resistabel because face it we are all so different NOTHING apeals to all of us.. Oh and might I suggest not putting down the very female subs you seek.. most dont find that Irresistable... just a thought.

Magik's slave

_____________________________

If you’re going through hell keep on moving
don't slow down
if you’re scared dont show it
you might get out
before the devil even knows your there.

-Rodney Atkins-

(in reply to Politesub53)

Post #: 17

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 3:11:54 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DominantJim

Through my short travels here I've decided that the best way to find out about submissive women is to ask the dominant ones. Most of the submissive women are owned and seem to be either reluctant to give answers because of this, OR are bitchy as hell because they are owned and seem to feel that they don't need to show respect for other masters (mostly switches). So in order to attain an untainted answer I'm coming to you wonderful ladies. My question is what should I do to make myself irrisistable to the women on a site like this where most men abuse the system just to get laid. I am sincere in my quest to find a woman or women for me.

All right.. from the point of view of a submissive woman (since that is group you are trying to get):

A) Don't assume dominant women would be looking for same things as submissive women
B) Realize that respect is earned. Nobody owes it to you. Merely claiming the title "master" doesn't earn any beyond the respect you are given as a living being with feelings.
C) The phrase "I am purely a sexual Dom/Master" would disclude you from my search. I'm not looking for a purely sexual dom/master. I desire a man who is dominant both inside and outside the bedroom and I would not be desperate enough to settle for less. Not sass - just the truth.
D) That you mention discreet makes me wonder if you are married or something. I refuse to help someone cheat so that would be a red flag for me.

Now, the fact that you respect dominant women says a lot for you and I would consider that a very good thing. Still, the discreet and the purely sexual factors would completely exclude you for me and most of the sub/slave women I know. Sorry if this bothers you, but is the truth.

Edited for typo

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 6/30/2007 3:21:18 PM >

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to DominantJim)

Post #: 18

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 3:19:27 PM

MagiksSlave

Posts: 2768
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: DominantJim

Through my short travels here I've decided that the best way to find out about submissive women is to ask the dominant ones. Most of the submissive women are owned and seem to be either reluctant to give answers because of this, OR are bitchy as hell because they are owned and seem to feel that they don't need to show respect for other masters (mostly switches). So in order to attain an untainted answer I'm coming to you wonderful ladies. My question is what should I do to make myself irrisistable to the women on a site like this where most men abuse the system just to get laid. I am sincere in my quest to find a woman or women for me.

All right.. from the point of view of a submissive woman (since that is group you are trying to get):

A) Don't assume dominant women would be looking for same things as submissive women
B) Realize that respect is earned. Nobody owes it to you. Merely claiming the title "master" doesn't earn any beyond the respect you are given as a living being with feelings.
C) The phrase "I am purely a sexual Dom/Master" would disclude you from my search. I'm not looking for a purely sexual dom/master. I desire a man who is dominate both inside and outside the bedroom and I would not be desperate enough to settle for less. Not sass - just the truth.
D) That you mention discreet makes me wonder if you are married or something. I refuse to help someone cheat so that would be a red flag for me.

Now, the fact that you respect dominant women says a lot for you and I would consider that a very good thing. Still, the discreet and the purely sexual factors would completely exclude you for me and most of the sub/slave women I know. Sorry if this bothers you, but is the truth.

He may show respect for Domanent females but he shows total disrespect for submissive females so really its a wash.. in fact I think it comes out in the negative becuase he is showing disrespect for the very thing he seeks.

Magik's slave

_____________________________

If you’re going through hell keep on moving
don't slow down
if you’re scared dont show it
you might get out
before the devil even knows your there.

-Rodney Atkins-

(in reply to AquaticSub)

Post #: 19

RE: All you smart Ladies - 6/30/2007 3:24:11 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave

He may show respect for Domanent females but he shows total disrespect for submissive females so really its a wash.. in fact I think it comes out in the negative becuase he is showing disrespect for the very thing he seeks.

Magik's slave

Well, to be specific he is being disrespectful of owned subs and slaves. The problem is that we were all unowned at some point and hence we know what we were looking for and what made our owners irrisistable to us. I would think this would be useful information since sometimes single people think they want one thing, but once they get it they realize what they actually want is very different.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to MagiksSlave)

Post #: 20

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