Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: another day another thought


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: another day another thought Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: another day another thought - 7/4/2007 7:59:31 AM   
sadomasokisti


Posts: 221
Joined: 10/20/2005
From: Iceland
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: instynctive

I would/might give them a taste of physical punishment, but most likely switch tactics in mid-stride and explore other options, such as denial or sensory deprivation.  Perhaps a little cage time while being subjected to "Kenny G's Greatest Hits".  Perhaps overall refusal to play.

There are boundless options for the creative sadistic mind...



Kenny G is definitely a hard limit

_____________________________


Pain is good. Extreme pain is extremely good

(in reply to instynctive)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: another day another thought - 7/4/2007 8:03:28 AM   
GhitaAmati


Posts: 3263
Joined: 5/30/2007
Status: offline
quote:

I would prefer my partners to be adult, self analyzing and intelligent enough not to need punishment.


Then maybe we differ in what we call "punishment" I see any need for correction as punishment, and seeing as how most subs I know arent mind readers, at some point they will need to be corrected for not doing the exact right thing. Its part of the learnign process. No one I know, can consistantly hear a set of rules once, and ALWAYS follow all of them from that moment forward. Habits are something that take time to develop.

< Message edited by GhitaAmati -- 7/4/2007 8:06:39 AM >

(in reply to earthycouple)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: another day another thought - 7/4/2007 8:07:59 AM   
amiciaN


Posts: 228
Joined: 1/20/2007
Status: offline
As someone who craves pain play, I can state that for me, physical punishment definately still works!  First of all, the mindset is definitely the primary factor, but there is usually also a difference in the actual delivery.  Most pain play scenes start slowly and build up, however with effective punishment this was not the case in my experience.  Effective physical punishments for me require full on 'maximum' blows from the start, need to come in quick succession and be limited in number.  The whole thing is over and done with so quickly there is no time to process the pain into anything but pain.  Coupled with the mindset of disappointing one's Dominant, it can make for a pretty miserable pain slut and yet deprive them of any rewards for that misery outside of the inherent value of the correction to the overall relationship to start with and the emotional release of guilt from being punished.

As always, this is just my opinion based on my own understanding and experieces.  ymmv


_____________________________

NChaka's amicia

I have never been lifted so high as when I kneel at His feet.

(in reply to instynctive)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: another day another thought - 7/4/2007 8:11:59 AM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

windchimes wrote:

You wish!!!  LMAO!



All right, young lady, you're on detention!
 
quote:

little miss four paddles wrote:
 
Is Nirvana too strong of a word?

 
bandit, that would be accurate, I'd say
 
quote:

lighthearted wrote:
 
oh, honestly!


No chicken seizure salad for you!

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to earthycouple)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: another day another thought - 7/4/2007 8:16:54 AM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GhitaAmati

Personally, Im against using physical pain as punishment, even if the sub isnt a plain slut, but to talk from the other side, yes I have had physical pain used on me as punishment and trust me I knew it was punishment and didnt enjoy it one bit because I knew that He was doing it because he was dissapointed in me and was correcting me.

Level, I agree in that if you are "constantly" punishing, something else is wrong in the relationship, but I think any relationship is going to have bumps at some point. The best trained sub in the world could forget something someday, and need to be reminded of her protocols and her place. Just because we know what to do, if we dont continuosly practice is, somethings slip our minds...

I am a self proclaimed pain slut, in fact, in my current relationship, that is our entire dynamic, we scene, He is a Top, Im a bottom, no other D/s dynamic in place whatsoever. When we arent playing, we have an equal marriage. I know that if I was in a position to be with my former Sir, even though I know all the rules he expects of me, I would be struggling like heck to actually do them, its been years. And if I made a mistake, I would expect to be corrected. Even though I enjoy pain, a sharp smack to the hand would be all it would take to remind me that I did something wrong and I would be devastated. Its all in where our mind is when it happens.


(and Level, if the entire world thought like you did, youd never be able to get your perfect partner because the rest of the world would have gotten to them first)



Ghita, I agree about bumps occuring, and in correction, but as I think you allude to in another post, some see correction as punishment, but I don't.
 
On the final point; I'm the best me around, so even if everyone thought like me, there would still only be one me ; now, as to whether anyone else considers that a good thing......
 
 

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to GhitaAmati)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: another day another thought - 7/4/2007 8:21:27 AM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: najla12

if a slave/sub enjoys extreme pain, can/is phyical punishment effective?


Withdrawing it can be very effective punishment.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to najla12)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: another day another thought - 7/4/2007 8:22:26 AM   
cuddleheart50


Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
Status: offline
Punishment= Spanking....Yes!

_____________________________

Dance like no one is watching,
Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.


(in reply to Level)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: another day another thought - 7/4/2007 8:27:27 AM   
Driver1961


Posts: 459
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

Ghita, I agree about bumps occuring, and in correction, but as I think you allude to in another post, some see correction as punishment, but I don't
 
I agree, to call correction as punishment is to call all criticism as negative.  The OP was questioning 'punishment' to a pain-slut which means punishment as consequence from displeasure. I stand by my previous post.  I try to lead growth by furthering the Dynamic not creating actions that can obliterate it

_____________________________

Dance as though nobody is watching!

(in reply to Level)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: another day another thought - 7/4/2007 8:29:26 AM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
His hand is his hand, whether he's enjoying himself or correcting.  A slap to the face can spin me into sub-space or make me cringe deeply from the inside, depending on the motivation behind it.  Just as a biting word can, just as an implement...etc.

I'll agree with those who spoke of the mindset.


PS:  I wanted to add that I think there is a difference between correction and punishment.  For me, correction is the act of redirecting whatever it is I am thinking, saying or doing, either by telling me or physically moving me, or maybe with a quick flick of his hand to get my attention.  Punishment is suffering a consequence of disobeying, that is longer lasting, more severe, expresses his displeasure, and comes with a lot of conversation and ends with an essay on the subject.

< Message edited by ownedgirlie -- 7/4/2007 8:36:51 AM >

(in reply to najla12)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: another day another thought - 7/4/2007 8:34:27 AM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cuddleheart50

Punishment= Spanking....Yes!


I'm shocked that you'd think that, shocked!

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to cuddleheart50)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: another day another thought - 7/4/2007 9:18:37 AM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
Some will say no because you're giving the person something they enjoy. Some say yes because your intent behind what you are doing is different. I suggest asking the partner. If they lie, it will soon be evident.

Master Fire

< Message edited by MasterFireMaam -- 7/4/2007 9:19:22 AM >


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to najla12)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: another day another thought - 7/4/2007 10:15:53 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: najla12
if a slave/sub enjoys extreme pain, can/is phyical punishment effective?

Yes.

One of the biggest myths is that if you like pain, you can't be punished with pain.

It's about the mindset.  If the person is internalizing the pain as wrong and bad and a sign of something that needs to change, then it is effective.  If the person is not internalizing, then nothing will make a difference.

And trust me, there's always a way to go above a masochists pain/pleasure threshhold.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to najla12)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: another day another thought - 7/4/2007 10:21:09 AM   
SlaveBlutarsky


Posts: 491
Joined: 10/10/2005
From: Upstate, NY
Status: offline
For me, I like pain, but not extreme, and there are implements that I just cannot stand, so physical punishment is still effective. In all reality though, the mental aspect of letting my partner down is much more powerful a punishment for me. It can feel like my world is collapsing around me sometimes, which I don't know is a good or bad thing.


_____________________________

Strong for all, weak for one

(in reply to earthycouple)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: another day another thought - 7/4/2007 12:06:46 PM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline
for me....pain=reward...i don't want to mess up this connection in my head...and on top of that, since i was little corpral punishment only made me disassociate...i get pain i don't like, i dissapear...out of body experience...or so it seems...
also like it was mentioned, i can beat myself up much worse than any physical punishment...i do sometimes need the release of like a written punishment or a time out...it allows me to be punished for a set time and be done with it..otherwise i will continue for way to long
doesn't work for everyone but it works for me..

(in reply to SlaveBlutarsky)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: another day another thought - 7/4/2007 12:09:59 PM   
imthatacheyouhav


Posts: 1259
Joined: 4/16/2007
Status: offline
i am a masochist, and yet physical punishment is effective on me. Its the "punishment" part of it that makes the energy different...and NO fun for me.

< Message edited by imthatacheyouhav -- 7/4/2007 12:10:13 PM >


_____________________________

*if you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything*
**collared July 22 2007 by LordKen**

(in reply to najla12)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: another day another thought - 7/4/2007 12:17:45 PM   
proudsub


Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline
quote:

I sooooo want to be punished by Instynctive


If you want it then how can that be considered punishment.  IMHO punishment should be used to correct or change a behavior, something unpleasant associated with the behavior.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan


(in reply to GhitaAmati)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: another day another thought - 7/4/2007 6:48:28 PM   
LadyHeart


Posts: 561
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: najla12

if a slave/sub enjoys extreme pain, can/is phyical punishment effective?


I can take a huge amount of pain on my back, but touch my arse and that to me is "bad" pain. Master therefore punishes me with the cane. I really hate it, and will do almost anything to avoid it. There are always spots that hurt "bad" - like the backs of the legs or the soles of the feet. Physical punishment can be very effective, even with pain sluts. Just find the spot they DON'T like
:))
LH

_____________________________

"BDSM is not an excuse for bad manners."

(in reply to najla12)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: another day another thought - 7/6/2007 12:58:28 PM   
earthycouple


Posts: 4462
Joined: 2/19/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GhitaAmati

quote:

I would prefer my partners to be adult, self analyzing and intelligent enough not to need punishment.


Then maybe we differ in what we call "punishment" I see any need for correction as punishment, and seeing as how most subs I know arent mind readers, at some point they will need to be corrected for not doing the exact right thing. Its part of the learnign process. No one I know, can consistantly hear a set of rules once, and ALWAYS follow all of them from that moment forward. Habits are something that take time to develop.


I don't and never will see "correction" as "punishment" they are two different animals in my opinion.  Correction for me is saying "no the jelly goes on the top shelf" or "I didn't want it that way, I want it this way" or even "why did you do that, it's not what I wanted". 

Punishment is more along the lines of a horrible error committed either deliberately or without thinking first...um such as....um...wow having a hard time coming up with one...how about deliberate disrespect.  That would encourage me to discipline via some means of miserable activity.

_____________________________

D~

Seeking, searching, hoping, living, loving, jumping. So what's new with you?

(in reply to GhitaAmati)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: another day another thought - 7/6/2007 8:26:31 PM   
TexasMaam


Posts: 1467
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline
Nope.  Shunning, withholding, and denial work best. TM

_____________________________

~ My opinions are not necessarily those of the management... ~

(in reply to najla12)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: another day another thought - 7/6/2007 8:28:22 PM   
Mystique567


Posts: 273
Joined: 6/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

quote:

ORIGINAL: bandit25

I think Level is right. 


And, if more people wrote that, thought that, really dwelled upon it, and accepted it, how nice would the world be?


lol very nice for level indeed

(in reply to Level)
Profile   Post #: 40
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2] 3   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: another day another thought Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.109