RE: It broke off in his butt

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SeeksOnlyOne -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 7:54:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DianeB269 Keep the jokes coming cuz, I'm gonna make him read this thread later. Diane as he is reading this, walk into the room, with the broken strap on, and a tube of super glue, mumbling something like "i wonder if they have enough jokes for a chapter 2?"

DianeB269 -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 7:56:11 AM)
I have a feeling this will never end. lol Diane

SeeksOnlyOne -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 7:56:20 AM)
[sm=biggrin.gif][sm=biggrin.gif][sm=biggrin.gif][sm=biggrin.gif][sm=biggrin.gif] quote: ORIGINAL: LadyEllen The other evening, strap on tied I took my subby for a ride But soon we heard this eery snap That sent him into quite a flap "Its broken off!" he moaned and cried And sure enough it was inside I could have laughed, but that were cruel Instead I searched round for a tool To extricate it, get it out But all his running had no doubt Loosened it, and out it popped Straight onto the floor it flopped The lesson here is check your toys Before you use them on your boys E

LadyEllen -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 8:07:09 AM)
Would this count as rectile dysfunction? E

chiaThePet -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 8:13:58 AM)
BrokeBack Mountain The Sequel A Definite Dildon't Strapon/Strapoff I'm Sorry, It Was An Assident Lost, The Season Premiere, Dark Cavern Hey Asshole, Give It Back chia* (the pet)

LadyEllen -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 8:27:31 AM)
You know how women are always asking "does my butt look big in this?" Well, at least he can now sympathise. Albeit he'll have to ask "does this look big in my butt?" E

beargonewild -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 8:32:51 AM)
I guess them's the breaks eh?

LadyEllen -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 8:33:13 AM)
This poor guy has taken a lot of stick. I wouldnt be surprised if he gets annoyed and forms a splinter group, although whether he can get off his ass to do anything right now is in doubt. E

LadyEllen -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 8:42:58 AM)
I want to know how it just fell out? I mean, Lemmiwinks and Paris Hilton never just fell out of Mr Slave..... is there nothing of educational value on TV these days? E

LadyEllen -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 8:49:05 AM)
Mind you, youre really lucky to have him you know? Most guys I know are a lot more anally retentive than that. E

LadyEllen -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 8:50:55 AM)
Hey - am I on my own here? You should all know by now, you only get out what you put in. E

MstrssPassion -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 8:54:47 AM)
I recounted a story similar to this on darkChylde's Oops thread a couple days ago: quote: ORIGINAL: MstrssPassion I got a good one but oops wasn't the exact words used... it was more like, "well, that has never happened before" We were having a rather intimate scene that included anal play with a couple of eggs. When I removed the eggs, one came out fine & the other came out with no egg on the end of the wire... that is when I said "well, that has never happened before". She was immediately alarmed & inquired as to what is not suppose to happen? I showed her the wire without the egg. She began to panic & I told her.... calm down, it will be ok & directed her to the bathroom & told her to sit on the toilet. She was still very alarmed so I told her it was VERY important that she follow my instructions so we could remove it. I told her first she needed to tuck her thumbs into her armpits... then begin to move her elbows up & down.... then lastly, cluck like a chicken. LOL

Driver1961 -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 8:59:05 AM)
He dips His lid to all; Ah, I could tell you all a similar story but a tampon is not the same however the solution is similar......... 1. Settle Petal! 2. 'There is only one possible exit' 3. 'Lay up into the stirrup position' 4. 'Breathe slowly and deeply' 5. 'Settle Petal, I said SETTLE!' (Ignore looking for the chook head) 6. 'Bear down and PUSH!' (Whisper gently and wipe forehead with facetowel) 7. ' When will we hold the Christening Party?'

spankmepink11 -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 9:05:24 AM)
Similar story here, although it was a ginger root....and it DID all come out in the end....

DrkJourney -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 9:06:56 AM)
oh thanks SO much DianaB, I just spewed water all over my screen....sigh...lol And Ellen you need to quit....lol The guys at work should be scared now ....I"m always threatening to break my foot off in their ass.....this is close...lol I hope your sub is doing well...all jokes aside that had to be traumatic

Trampler -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 9:19:36 AM)
That is the perfect title for this thread. I was writing an email to sub that I had a date with last night, and saw that flash by, I was like wtf? and finally got to the message boards, barely managed to curb my curiousity so I could savor the moment, and was not disapointed!! heheheheheehe. What are some of the other strap-on stories? I have used one once, but he liked it alittle to much. shoulda got a much bigger one. evil laugh

LadyHugs -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 9:20:35 AM)
Dear DianeB269, Ladies and Gentlemen; I agree in always checking out your equipment. Anything man-made has to be weaker than what is created by nature. That is why I check out men--make sure their phallus won't break off--[Chuckles] ---Aren't we ladies and gentlemen glad the human phallus doesn't 'break off' --LOL Respectfully submitted with a lot of humor, Lady Hugs

LadyEllen -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 9:24:25 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DrkJourney And Ellen you need to quit....lol What? You think I'm pushing it a bit too much now? Time to break off you mean? E

LadyEllen -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 9:27:12 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyHugs ---Aren't we ladies and gentlemen glad the human phallus doesn't 'break off' --LOL Respectfully submitted with a lot of humor, Lady Hugs well, that depends who youre asking........ personally speaking, it sounds like it might be a good thing. E

Vendaval -> RE: It broke off in his butt (7/4/2007 10:10:39 AM)
No doubt the fear made him clench his buttcheeks tighter which kept it from moving outwards and so he became yet more afraid and... This almost sounds like childbirth, "Just relax and push out on the breaths, now hold my hand tight!" Think I need coffee because my brain cannot decide whether this mental image is absurdly funny or wickedly bizarre. (Wanders down to the kitchen for some instant buzz)

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