cross-dressing

cross-dressing (Full Version)

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wldchld -> cross-dressing (7/8/2007 8:58:14 AM)
Just wanted feed back on cross-dressing. I see it pop up in different threads, like feminization, and some of the strap-on threads. I normally see a lot of negative response to the idea from a lot of the doms. I personally enjoy it. But as of yet have found a partner who would be comfortable with the idea. So any thoughts?

earthycouple -> RE: cross-dressing (7/8/2007 9:11:07 AM)
I enjoy dressing a male if he has a certain look. I can't give you more than that, because I can't describe the look, I know it when I see it. I don't desire to force femme anyone. What I will say is one of the very hottest scenes I've ever enjoyed was with a cross dresser who is right here on this very site...it was a few years ago before a local dungeon closed and we both had an amazing time. It was sexy, charging, hot and lusty.

CrimsonMoan -> RE: cross-dressing (7/8/2007 9:21:11 AM)
I am in agreement with Earthy, which is usually a regular thing :-P I have dressed 3 subs up before adn it was because they had a rather feminie build and look to them.had a fair number of people fooled and was a bunch of fun. all of them hand rather long hair so spent some time embracing my girly side with the curling iron and hair spray. I love doing it but I also love that they love it

nickymaz -> RE: cross-dressing (7/8/2007 9:29:09 AM)
This has been a fantasy for mine for a very long time, never actually got to do it but I would like to some day. It does seem like there are a lot of women out there who have no intrest in this, and are in fact pretty disgusted by it. I can understand that. But you do have a smaller group that is 100% gung ho for feminization. There are a lot of websites out there that cater to this, sissify.com comes to mind. I've been thinking, why aren't more women involved in this lifestyle. It seems like our society is becoming very execpting of women assuming leadership in relationships and many other arenas (politics, business etc). To me it just seems this is just about every woman's dream, and I don't understand why female domination isn't more mainstream. It's the de facto for so many 'vanilla' relationships today, why not go all out?

Lashra -> RE: cross-dressing (7/8/2007 2:29:12 PM)
Yes, My sub is very comfortable with cross dressing and I enjoy him doing so. It makes shopping trips so much more enjoyable. [:D] He looks very sexy in his schoolgirl outfit and his legs are perfect for thigh hi's. Very sexy. ~Lashra

Trampler -> RE: cross-dressing (7/8/2007 6:26:42 PM)
while I find the idea amusing and even sexy dressing my sub for a party, it doesn't do anything for me long term. I don't know why. It doesn't disgust me though. I am all for someone dressing as comfortably as they can. though on a side note, just this past weekend met 2 CD's that I am attracted to, though saw them as guys, not guys who look like women. lol

tobeshi -> RE: cross-dressing (7/9/2007 6:39:32 AM)
If this lifestyle were approached with more of an open mind and a realization of what is really being offerred by some of the sub and what can be accomplished by the dom, it would be much more acceptable and desired. For the serious participants, with the right individuals this lifestyle is a win-win arrangement and exchange. Sadly, a large number of the cd/tv/t? devotees receive an unfair reputation as being only a self serving, I, me, my group. This and the mockery of womanhood by a few has cast an unfavorable light on our group as a whole. These week-end wantabe women need to weeded out and recatagorized. Keeping one`s priorities straight, realizing that we are here first to serve ( being dressed or not) and remembering that it is not our wants and desires that come first could go a long way. It seems that unless one is fortunate enough to already be involved with or is extremely lucky enough to gain favor from an understanding mistress we will remain bottom feeders in this food chain.

MamaDomme -> RE: cross-dressing (7/9/2007 9:37:14 AM)
I have had previous partners that dressed-- one I had never ever seen as a male-- always dressed as a woman. It was fabulous! I like to dress my submissives sometimes-- but it's not something that I choose to do on a regular basis.

thetammyjo -> RE: cross-dressing (7/9/2007 10:08:17 AM)
Personally, for me, these fetishes feel like they re-enforcing gender typing that casts the feminine as passive and submissive. I have trained and owned one cross-dresser in my years of doing this. When he dressed up, we went out as sisters and as co-tops. That to me was very cool because he saw feminine as empowering.

LadyClaudiaVan -> RE: cross-dressing (7/9/2007 10:16:55 AM)
I would have to say that its always been a bewilderment why some very much dislike it. Feminization has nothing to do with depicting femaleness as unfavorable or undesirable and really it is nothing more complex than breaking down the male ego and machismo with taboos that men had to face growing up, such as "real men don't wear panties", "real men don't do their nails and makeup", etc. etc. Feminization breaks men out of that 'real man' template and teaches them some much needed humility and is healthy for growth and maturity.

LotusSong -> RE: cross-dressing (7/9/2007 11:08:00 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: earthycouple I enjoy dressing a male if he has a certain look. I can't give you more than that, because I can't describe the look, I know it when I see it. .. like John Mark Carr? :)

LadyPact -> RE: cross-dressing (7/9/2007 1:56:52 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: tobeshi If this lifestyle were approached with more of an open mind and a realization of what is really being offerred by some of the sub and what can be accomplished by the dom, it would be much more acceptable and desired. For the serious participants, with the right individuals this lifestyle is a win-win arrangement and exchange. Sadly, a large number of the cd/tv/t? devotees receive an unfair reputation as being only a self serving, I, me, my group. This and the mockery of womanhood by a few has cast an unfavorable light on our group as a whole. These week-end wantabe women need to weeded out and recatagorized. Keeping one`s priorities straight, realizing that we are here first to serve ( being dressed or not) and remembering that it is not our wants and desires that come first could go a long way. It seems that unless one is fortunate enough to already be involved with or is extremely lucky enough to gain favor from an understanding mistress we will remain bottom feeders in this food chain. I don't consider Myself closed-minded on too many topics, but on this one, I'll agree with you that I am. It holds no interest for Me, no attraction, no spark whatsoever. In the case of many CD's, it is more about the feminization. Translated to his fetish over and above My domination. If his "being dressed or not" has no effect on his submission, then why would this be a necessary activity? Wouldn't the fact that he would have the want/need to dress surpass My desires in the first place?

tobeshi -> RE: cross-dressing (7/9/2007 3:07:58 PM)
LadyPact, I`m sorry that you feel that way and do understand your bias. In fact given my limited contact and exposure with others like myself, I might eveen feel the same way. For far too many of us you are right that dressing seem to be the only and primary concern. For others though dressing is just part of who we are. It is by no means all of nor should we be completely defined or judged by this one character trait. It has been part of me for along time. I did not ask for it and I can`t change it. I have accepted it as part of my individual personality make-up and embrace it as much as any other facet that makes me ...me; just as is being submissive. It seems almost everyone involved with this lifestyle prefers to wear or not to wear certain types of clothing or costumes. This is just mine. It is not an attempt to belittle, cheapen or in any way to insult women. I do not do it 24/7/365 in fact the amount of time I am dressed is fractional and pales in comparison to the time I spend as being traditional. I do enjoy it but did not realize that it was wrong to do so. I had assumed that as much as one may enjoy being a dom and another enjoying being a sub, the arrangement could and should be rewarding for both. If one has raised children or animals the results of positive reenforcement are readily visible. Your desires and will should always come first. I don`t see how knowing or exposing someone`s weakness occassionaly and indulging it is so bad? I pet my dog and give him a treat when he does good. shi

Elorin -> RE: cross-dressing (7/9/2007 3:18:46 PM)
I love crossdressers in many aspects. I dislike crossdressers who are looking for one thing but claim to be another in approaching me. I dislike "forcing" someone to crossdress unless it is a pre-negotiated clear cut role play scene. I have no agenda to force any male to wear woment's clothing against their will, and I have no desire to take a masculine man, strip away his masculininty and turn him into a woman. I am happy to help someone who wants to explore femininity, women's clothing, sensuality, and bisexual fantasies through crossdressing. I love to go shopping with a crossdresser for whom it's all about wearing women's clothing and nothing else. ~E

Grlwithboy -> RE: cross-dressing (7/9/2007 3:34:26 PM)
I like crossdressers, but they should like being dressed. I don't want to tell them to do it, make them do it, constantly have to reinforce that they should do it - I will happily work with a dressed male, with a male with or without matching feminine persona, however he wants to cut it. I will deal with the submissive on the terms he/she presents himself/herself on. I will also happily work with female bodied bois. I don't find anything selfish if they feel better about their bodies if they're packing and dressed, but I don't think that's the basis for the scene or of much interest in itself.

wldchld -> RE: cross-dressing (7/9/2007 3:45:44 PM)
thanks very much for all the positive feed back.

thetammyjo -> RE: cross-dressing (7/9/2007 4:00:48 PM)
I have a follow up question to those who do cross dress and say it isn't a comment on women. Could you be submissive if you were not crossed dressed or do you feel that you need the cross dressing to help you feel submissive? If it helps you feel submissive can you then understand why some of us feel that it is a commentary on gender roles?

Lockit -> RE: cross-dressing (7/9/2007 5:14:43 PM)
I am very new to this and am still in a processing mode. I see many benefits and yet because I don't understand much of it I don't feel that I would be able to address this in a relationship at this point. I was happy to see this thread, as I am trying to understand so that I don't jump into something I am not prepared for or knowledgeable about. I have had a number of emails and have had no problem in communicating with or being friends with someone who cross dresses, but I did get one email I could not answer because I had no idea what to say in response to what was said. I wouldn't wish to do any harm in my ignorance. This thread has reminded me that I need to email him back and was negligent in the situation... but I still have no idea what to say to him. So thank you for this thread! I wish you well in your search wldchld!

wldchld -> RE: cross-dressing (7/9/2007 8:44:27 PM)
I hope I did this right, never actually responded to just one person on a thread. I actually feel that cross-dressing at least for me hasnt much to do with submission. I truly enjoy it. I'd like to say that women are so very lucky to be able to wear the types of panties and lingerie that they do wear. It truly just expounds upon the womans natural beauty. I think that for me, being able to slip into cute boy shorts or a sexy little number thong is so comfortable and sexy. Men are just limited to boxers, so very dull. I would hope to one day just find a woman who wouldn't mind if I was wearing panties just like her. The material, the colors, patterns, etc etc. And, I do feel that the gender bending involved is very relaxing and stimulating. Hope this makes sense.

thetammyjo -> RE: cross-dressing (7/10/2007 5:49:37 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: wldchld I hope I did this right, never actually responded to just one person on a thread. I actually feel that cross-dressing at least for me hasnt much to do with submission. I truly enjoy it. I'd like to say that women are so very lucky to be able to wear the types of panties and lingerie that they do wear. It truly just expounds upon the womans natural beauty. I think that for me, being able to slip into cute boy shorts or a sexy little number thong is so comfortable and sexy. Men are just limited to boxers, so very dull. I would hope to one day just find a woman who wouldn't mind if I was wearing panties just like her. The material, the colors, patterns, etc etc. And, I do feel that the gender bending involved is very relaxing and stimulating. Hope this makes sense. That's a great answer. It demonstrates that for you the dressing is separate from the submission and more a reflection of the limitations of acceptable men's clothing, if I'm understanding you correctly. In that regard I fully agree. I think it is very sad that men are limited in colors and fabrics that are ok (according to society or their training). Frankly except for some basic biological and body form differences that might be taken into account for some clothing, fabric and color do not have any innate gender or sex. Look at the world of other animals. Males tend to be more colorful there so why the reverse with us bloody humans? I must say though that I have a lot respect for men who then take different colors and fabric and use them instead of simply replacing them with garments originally designed for women. So when Tom takes weeks to find more colorful socks for himself or Fox hunts around for silky briefs or boxers I see that as their attempt to recreate men's clothing and tackle what is acceptable for men head-on. I do respect and understand your opinion about color and fabric though, wldchld. I say good on you for refusing to only use those that are 'acceptable' to the general society.

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