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RE: A Show of Respect - 7/25/2007 3:38:46 PM

salilus

Posts: 201
Joined: 5/18/2007
Status: offline

Thank you all for the honest answers

This is my... issue... I think: most of what I've read here are things I do out of love and courtesy and not out of respect for a person. To me, there are different levels of respect, that are reserved for specific individuals. I wouldn't for instance, give the same respect to my best friend that I give to a college professor. And, I wouldn't give the same level of respect for a goofy, happy-go-lucky college professor as I would for one who was cool, calm, and in control of himself.

By the way, I have asked this of my owner; I know what he expects of me. The question is out of curiousity. Your sarcasm is noted and appreciated, however. ;)

(in reply to sleazybutterfly)

Post #: 21

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/25/2007 3:50:14 PM

slaveluci

Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: salilus
This is my... issue... I think: most of what I've read here are things I do out of love and courtesy and not out of respect for a person

Just a thought but love, courtesy, and respect don't have to be mutually exclusive

. I really thought hard about my answer to you before I posted it. As you asked, I didn't mention "getting naked" and I specifically didn't mention anything sexual. I mentioned things that I only do for Him and they are all done out of respect....respect for Him as my Owner and respect for His wishes - all of them.

Evidently, I don't know how to differentiate between love, courtesy, and respect as you are indicating? I really tried

. Sorry if it didn't help...............luci

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to salilus)

Post #: 22

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/25/2007 3:51:53 PM

TopinPa

Posts: 111
Joined: 6/11/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

I'll actually ask them questions and listen to the answers.

I can totally respect someone with good communication skills...it's so imporant

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 23

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/25/2007 4:00:10 PM

kyraofMists

Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: salilus
How do you show your respect to your top/owner/dominant/master/mistress/insert-honorific-here? What things do you do or say that make it utterly clear that you respect them?

I show my respect to him and our relationship by being obedient. The most disrespectful thing that I could do to him is disobey.

Knight's Kyra

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to salilus)

Post #: 24

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/25/2007 4:21:10 PM

IvyMorgan

Posts: 729
Joined: 7/5/2007
From: Midlands, UK
Status: offline

Someone I/we respect gets to see al of me/us.

(And I'm not meaning that in a taking my clothes off sense, I have DID.)

(in reply to kyraofMists)

Post #: 25

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/25/2007 4:54:13 PM

MadRabbit

Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: salilus

How do you show your respect to your top/owner/dominant/master/mistress/insert-honorific-here? What things do you do or say that make it utterly clear that you respect them?

Yeah...what L.A. said.

The main difference between people I respect and people I dont is the lack or prescense of listening and not just simply waiting for their next turn to speak.

I think of disrespect and respect to be kind of like emotions. You can sense them in people threw body language and mannerisms and the way they can act.

Much like you can sense when someone is anger instantly, you can kind of sense respect or the lack of it in people as well.

Its not a science. If someone has genuine respect for me, I will be able to tell. And if they dont, well...you can forget about obedience and listening.

_____________________________

Advice for New Dominants
The Unpolitically Correct Lifestyle Definitions

Obama is NOT the Messiah! He's just a VERY NAUGHTY BOY

(in reply to salilus)

Post #: 26

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/25/2007 5:04:08 PM

sleazybutterfly

Posts: 2801
Joined: 5/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: salilus

Thank you all for the honest answers

This is my... issue... I think: most of what I've read here are things I do out of love and courtesy and not out of respect for a person. To me, there are different levels of respect, that are reserved for specific individuals. I wouldn't for instance, give the same respect to my best friend that I give to a college professor. And, I wouldn't give the same level of respect for a goofy, happy-go-lucky college professor as I would for one who was cool, calm, and in control of himself.

By the way, I have asked this of my owner; I know what he expects of me. The question is out of curiousity. Your sarcasm is noted and appreciated, however. ;)

Was I sarcastic and I didn't realize it? I mean don't get me wrong, I can be..but usually I realize it.

Assuming that was a fast reply and not to me.

_____________________________

~Flutterby
~Curvylicious
Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, she became a butterfly.
Life is not a popularity contest, it's better to be hated for what you believe, than loved for a lie.

(in reply to salilus)

Post #: 27

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/25/2007 6:00:12 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

And it's one of my favorite things in life that I don't have to actually listen in order to make someone think I'm listening. I have no problem making someone falsely believe I respect them in order to make my life easier.

Unless I actually respect them, then it's important that they know the truth. And interestingly enough, the one's I actually respect tend to be the ones who can tell the difference pretty darn easily.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to sleazybutterfly)

Post #: 28

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/25/2007 7:38:15 PM

BossyShoeBitch

Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
Status: offline

I agree wholeheartedly with LA, Domiguy, Luci, et al..

I listen, I try to my level best to really hear everything he is saying to me (and with my life, it's really hard to do that sometimes!)
I seek out (and follow) his advice. Not because of a label but because he is by far, one of the most insightful and level headed people I have ever known (I have only known one other person as insightful as he and I lost them many years ago).

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

And it's one of my favorite things in life that I don't have to actually listen in order to make someone think I'm listening. I have no problem making someone falsely believe I respect them in order to make my life easier.

Unless I actually respect them, then it's important that they know the truth. And interestingly enough, the one's I actually respect tend to be the ones who can tell the difference pretty darn easily.

ROTFLMAO!! How true!

_____________________________

A clever man can get out of situations a wise man never gets into...
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 29

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/25/2007 7:48:42 PM

MadRabbit

Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline

At one point in my life, I didnt respect anyone, not even myself.

Coincedentally, I didnt listen to anyone, not even myself.

_____________________________

Advice for New Dominants
The Unpolitically Correct Lifestyle Definitions

Obama is NOT the Messiah! He's just a VERY NAUGHTY BOY

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)

Post #: 30

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/25/2007 8:30:25 PM

salilus

Posts: 201
Joined: 5/18/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sleazybutterfly

quote:

ORIGINAL: salilus

Thank you all for the honest answers

This is my... issue... I think: most of what I've read here are things I do out of love and courtesy and not out of respect for a person. To me, there are different levels of respect, that are reserved for specific individuals. I wouldn't for instance, give the same respect to my best friend that I give to a college professor. And, I wouldn't give the same level of respect for a goofy, happy-go-lucky college professor as I would for one who was cool, calm, and in control of himself.

By the way, I have asked this of my owner; I know what he expects of me. The question is out of curiousity. Your sarcasm is noted and appreciated, however. ;)

Was I sarcastic and I didn't realize it? I mean don't get me wrong, I can be..but usually I realize it.

Assuming that was a fast reply and not to me.

Yes, it was just a fast reply.

I just think sarcasm, while common, is rather cute... even when I do it.

(in reply to sleazybutterfly)

Post #: 31

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/25/2007 8:37:24 PM

salilus

Posts: 201
Joined: 5/18/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveluci

quote:

ORIGINAL: salilus
This is my... issue... I think: most of what I've read here are things I do out of love and courtesy and not out of respect for a person

Just a thought but love, courtesy, and respect don't have to be mutually exclusive. I really thought hard about my answer to you before I posted it. As you asked, I didn't mention "getting naked" and I specifically didn't mention anything sexual. I mentioned things that I only do for Him and they are all done out of respect....respect for Him as my Owner and respect for His wishes - all of them.

Evidently, I don't know how to differentiate between love, courtesy, and respect as you are indicating? I really tried. Sorry if it didn't help...............luci

I didn't say it didn't help... even though, I wasn't really looking for help, honestly. This was a question I got thinking about and had the spare time to make a random post in a bdsm themed area on the internet. I was looking for a difference in opinions because I realised my idea of respect was... unusual after talking with my owner and a close friend. I think I'm not respectful because I don't do the things that equate respect in my mind.

If anything, I'm the one that can't seem to differentiate between love, courtesy and respect.

(in reply to slaveluci)

Post #: 32

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/25/2007 9:13:29 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

Maybe because too many focus on what they DO rather than what IS? I can respect someone I hate, I can respect someone I loathe, I can respect someone in ways and have no respect for them in other ways.

It's not really an all or nothing concept for me. So just because I DO something for a person, doesn't necessarily mean anything about THEM. Just like my limits don't change because of the person I'm with. It's all about ME, how I perceive them, how I intake them into my life.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to sleazybutterfly)

Post #: 33

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/26/2007 7:40:28 AM

slaveish

Posts: 1086
Joined: 2/19/2007
Status: offline

~Fast Reply~

I always always always keep in mind that I am representing Him, whether at work, at the grocery store, or wherever I am, whatever I'm doing. If a situation calls for being more patient than I would ordinarily be, I am more patient. If I have to be tougher than I would be on my own, that is what I do. I show him my respect by bringing him honor through my actions and words, even when he would not know about them.

_____________________________

You only lose what you cling to. ~~Gautama Sidharta

If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other. ~~Mother Teresa

(in reply to sleazybutterfly)

Post #: 34

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/26/2007 7:54:37 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

Maybe because too many focus on what they DO rather than what IS? I can respect someone I hate, I can respect someone I loathe, I can respect someone in ways and have no respect for them in other ways.

It's not really an all or nothing concept for me. So just because I DO something for a person, doesn't necessarily mean anything about THEM. Just like my limits don't change because of the person I'm with. It's all about ME, how I perceive them, how I intake them into my life.

LA, I just love how you, so often, manage to write what I was struggling to even think. Then I stop and think, yeah what she wrote!

In all years and all the jobs, I have only ever respected one boss. Yet I have always gotten stellar reviews, promotions, pay increases, etc etc. Another way to describe it, I often waited tables at swanky restaurants because the tips were awsome. I didn't have to respect the patrons to give them excellent service. I did it because it was my job, I did it very well, and I benefited from doing well. Service and physical tasks certainly do not, in themself, equal respect.

I am reminded of that website you once posted a link to......women writing their secret thoughts about their husbands. I would imagine the greater percentage of their spouses have no clue what the women's feelings really are because their actions at home do not show it.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 35

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/26/2007 7:57:56 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

LOL True Wife Confession! I stopped reading it because it just got really whiny without any of the good shockers.

You guys are giving me too much forum love! I'm grateful for it, but you know, now I really DO think I know it all ;)

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Post #: 36

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/26/2007 8:07:12 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

Well you do know alot. I know I have gained alot of respect for your knowledge and common sense approach to a vast array of topics on here.

On the flip side, I am sure someone will come along with some sharp stick trying to poke holes in your inflating head.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 37

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/26/2007 8:54:37 AM

ownedgirlie

Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

As has already been stated by another, the best way I can show my respect to my Master is to obey him. Nothing shows disrespect to him and his ownership of me stronger than if I do not obey.

(in reply to salilus)

Post #: 38

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/26/2007 10:19:39 AM

imthatacheyouhav

Posts: 1259
Joined: 4/16/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

As has already been stated by another, the best way I can show my respect to my Master is to obey him. Nothing shows disrespect to him and his ownership of me stronger than if I do not obey.

I couldn't agree more....Well said ownedgirlie....

_____________________________

*if you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything*
**collared July 22 2007 by LordKen**

(in reply to ownedgirlie)

Post #: 39

RE: A Show of Respect - 7/26/2007 10:48:34 AM

MisPandora

Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline

Respect is demonstrated in rather simple ways in my world.

My word is respected by understanding what I say or instruct, and by carrying out my instructions and doing what I have requested. If a subject doesn't grasp what I'm asking or saying, politely asking for more explanation is appreciated. You respect my words by heeding them.

My time is respected by paying attention, by being attentive to what needs to be accomplished when I'm not around, and by showing appreciation of the time that I extend to you. You respect my time by being present in your service to me.

I could go on, showing how respect is shown with personal space, physical self, etc. I think this should start to illustrate that it's really in the actions and inactions that someone actually respects or disrespects you. It goes far beyond the lip service that one might be extended, and is actually demonstrated as a tangible "thing".

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to salilus)

Post #: 40

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