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RE: Help im Desperate - 8/18/2007 9:31:14 AM   
severin37


Posts: 17
Joined: 5/30/2006
Status: offline 		yeah i agree with akasha also that i have to probably meet someone who is vanilla but has some kink and then move into a D/s relationship

however i am at a point right now when i am craving a realtime experience just to know whether or not this is fantasy or something i will like

so the orginal question still stands, is there anybody who has been to a pro-domme and would like to give me some info on how it went with your first meeting?

(in reply to UR2Badored)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/18/2007 9:57:18 AM   
Grlwithboy


Posts: 655
Joined: 2/8/2005
Status: offline 		I haven't been to one but I was one. If I were a young SM virgin who wanted to go the pro route I would:

Not make initial contact while turned on. Get it out of your system, and then think with the big head when you pick up the phone or email.
I would ditch on anyone who treated any and all communication as a scene. That may be great for wankers and for the jaded adrenaline junkie, but you should be treated with care and respect as long as you'd like to be.
While it isn't dating, it's fair to expect to *like* your pro, just like you should *like* your primary care physician at least a little. Chemistry is a valid thing to hope for. Likewise, she'll have more fun if you're likeable and interesting, and when she has fun, the scene has a kind of authenticity that makes the transactional nature of the beast a secondary thought, not the primary one, just like you shouldn't be thinking about the bill tucking into a stellar spread at Aquavit.
You will get more individual attention from someone who is an independent.I would consider an independent with her own, well-reviewed space, or an Indie who rents from the houses (they have good facilities) -- I would NOT as a novice opt for play in a hotel room. Houses are generally safe for client and provider, but can be a little impersonal and rushed in flavor (with some exceptions)
You're not going to find reviews of people here. I'm also not going to name names among my esteemed ex colleagues. Google is your friend in this, and your wits.

< Message edited by Grlwithboy -- 8/18/2007 9:59:28 AM >

(in reply to severin37)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/18/2007 10:39:02 AM   
earthycouple


Posts: 4462
Joined: 2/19/2006
Status: offline 		The variables are too great to even begin to give you an idea of what your experience will be vs. anyone else's.

If for example I am a pro (I'm not) how I interact with you, brand new, self claiming little to no experience will be different than what I do with those who have experiences.


_____________________________

D~

Seeking, searching, hoping, living, loving, jumping. So what's new with you?

(in reply to Grlwithboy)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/18/2007 12:09:35 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		Desperation, is never pretty

Jeff

(in reply to severin37)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/18/2007 12:33:24 PM   
severin37


Posts: 17
Joined: 5/30/2006
Status: offline 		alright i get it i shouldnt have used the word desperate

i just want answers of whether or not visiting  a pro for my first realtime would be a good idea

(in reply to Jeffff)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/18/2007 12:43:35 PM   
earthycouple


Posts: 4462
Joined: 2/19/2006
Status: offline 		asked and answered....look at post #23

_____________________________

D~

Seeking, searching, hoping, living, loving, jumping. So what's new with you?

(in reply to severin37)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/19/2007 5:36:56 AM   
trustingsubHF


Posts: 34
Joined: 8/19/2007
From: VA
Status: offline 		saying that you are desperate shows signs of weakness, making you a prime 'victim' for a financial Domme.

_____________________________

...never make Someone a priority when you are simply being viewed as an option...




~Owned property of HF~


(in reply to UR2Badored)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/19/2007 12:35:12 PM   
SirMIkeSD


Posts: 613
Joined: 3/16/2007
From: San Diego, Ca
Status: offline 		I agree with vagabondduo go to www.drkdesyre.com 

Caryl does a great job with her site, she has resources all over the US as well the many for the rest of the world.  Get involved in yout local community and you will find someone to play with.  I know there is a group in SC called SC Lock.  I no nothing about them personally but look them up and see what you can find out.

Mike


(in reply to UR2Badored)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/19/2007 5:42:04 PM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: severin37

no its not that

the first time i wrote im desperate was this thread

i just want realtime and the only people that are real on this site are the pro dommes because that is their business.  everyone else is either online, financial, lesbian, or much older than me.



And you know this because you've experienced all of the local RT BDSM groups and communities available to you, and now a prodom is your only option left?  That's pretty impressive....

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to severin37)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/19/2007 5:45:13 PM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: severin37

alright i get it i shouldnt have used the word desperate

i just want answers of whether or not visiting  a pro for my first realtime would be a good idea


Personally, I found the disparaging remarks that you made about others not to your liking the most attractive thing about you.  It's no wonder you have so many people beating your doors down to help you find what you seek.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to severin37)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/19/2007 6:57:29 PM   
littlesarbonn


Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline 		(fast reply, not to MisPandora's post)

ORIGINAL: severin37

alright i get it i shouldnt have used the word desperate

i just want answers of whether or not visiting  a pro for my first realtime would be a good idea


What I find fascinating is that I actually answered this question, and I'm a submissive who has, oh I don't know, a "tad" bit of experience in this area. It sometimes seems like all of my posts are "stealth" posts because they'll be ignored as people continue petty arguments over irrelevant things (well, that usually in other threads...this one I think people are kind of justified for taking the OP a bit negatively).

Anyway, you might want to actually reread this thread and see some of the posts where people actually did give you information. Some of us post under several screen names, so it's not always where you expect (have to keep changing names to keep ahead of the law and dominant women who are CONSTANTLY trying to kidnap me and do all sorts of mean things to me...wait a minute!...why am I hiding???).


_____________________________

<---- FYI, this picture looks JUST like me


http://www.littlesarbonn.com/Stickman/Stickman.htm
The Adventures of Stickman and the Unemployed Lego Spaceman

(in reply to MisPandora)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/20/2007 10:33:13 AM   
SnugasaBug


Posts: 49
Joined: 6/11/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: vagabondduo

Go to www.drkdesyre.com/
 
Click on "HERE"
Click on "Meet People"
Click on "Organizations and Contacts"
Then Click on SC....for South Carolina
 
You will see 2 BDSM organizations in your town.  I suggest you find the time to become involved with these groups.  If you don't, then perhaps you aren't so very desperate afterall. 

~~~~~~~~~~~
This listing ROCKS!

(in reply to vagabondduo)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/20/2007 10:46:57 AM   
SnugasaBug


Posts: 49
Joined: 6/11/2007
Status: offline 		Not me, but I know of one who did.  What happened for him, was he was so focused on reliving that one time experience, that he had a hard time, being open minded to the variety available. He has since, left the lifestyle, go figure.

Snug

(in reply to severin37)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/20/2007 10:50:05 AM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: severin37

   im a novice that really has no realtime experience.  i have been trying on this site but it seems like it wont work unless i go to a financial domme which i will not do because i think they are stupid little girls.  so i am left with the option of visiting a prodomme and actually getting a realtime domination session.  it might be desperation but i feel like that is the only way right now to get some realtime.

so my question is has anyone here ever gone to a pro domme for their first experience and how was it like?  also if you have gone to a pro domme anyways, what was it like?



I haven't ever been to a pro domme. But my guess is that the ones worth paying aren't hurting for clients so your opinion of them had better not be condesending or they won't bother with you.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to severin37)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/20/2007 10:53:33 AM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: severin37

you cant tell me im the error cause you dont know my experience

all the women around my area are too old, financiall, or lesbian

the only women that i have connected with are online and i want some realtime which leads to me finding a pro



God forbid you have to actually be patient to get a relationship worth having. No, we don't know your experience. But I do know that some people don't find a fulfilling relationship until they are in their thirties or forties, or even later. As a 21 year old male sub, you aren't really in short supply. Stop focusing on everyone else and start focusing on you. What makes you special. What can you provide that no one else can? What makes you worth spending time with?

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to severin37)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/20/2007 12:33:20 PM   
heartfeltsub


Posts: 1641
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline 		There are some really good real time groups in SC, a couple right in Columbia. However it appears from this thread that you have your mind closed to those possibilities, even though there are younger people in those groups, having been a member of T3WD myself. There is also a poster on here called EvilGeoff who helps with that group.

heartfelt

_____________________________

Life is an exciting business, and most exciting when it is lived for others.

Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.

Life is either a great adventure or nothing.

Helen Keller

50 NZ points

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/20/2007 12:52:02 PM   
fieryangel21


Posts: 40
Joined: 8/17/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: severin37

the "stupid little girls" is a reference to all the financial dommes out there that want doormats to pay for everything

and i have searched the munches online and i dont want to be around middle aged people who have done all sorts of stuff

i would be out of place and really uncomfortable

i think the best answer is visiting a young experienced professional who knows what she is doing.

plus no one has answered my orginal question which was are there any subs who have been to a pro and what was it like on your first session with her?



You want experience, but you don't want to be around experienced people because it will make you uncomfortable? If you really want this, you'll have to get over that. And you're not going to find anybody young and experienced. I am a Domme, and I am 21 years old. I am confident in knowing what I like and dislike because I have spent a lot of time exploring these things. But by no means do I consider myself exceptionally experienced. I'm too young. I didn't decide I wanted to be a Domme at 12, for crying out loud. That definitely doesn't mean I don't know what I'm doing.

I'm also sort of offended that you think we're all lesbians. I am only actively searching for a female sub, not because I'm gay (I am very much bisexual), but because I prefer women. I also believe that no one is answering your question because they are too shocked by the immaturity behind it. How old are you? Are you even 18?

Do yourself a favor. Put down the shovel, stop digging, and maybe we'll help you out of that nice deep hole you're now in and have a mature conversation with you.

_____________________________

Angel


I always find myself wondering when signing on to the public computers on campus, "Do you really care about my personal settings, or are you just programmed to say that?"

(in reply to severin37)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/20/2007 1:34:00 PM   
darchChylde


Posts: 5279
Joined: 9/28/2006
From: Warm Springs, GA but i live in San Francisco.
Status: offline 		what's wrong with older women?  how much lifestyle experience are you expecting from a 25 year old?  yes, i'm hitting the stereotypes here, but i am also going from my own experience; but older women tend to be more tender and considerate to their partner's needs and confident (not bitchy) about getting their own needs met

if you are looking for sexual, a woman who takes care of herself can have firm smooth skin well into their 50s; i have a 60 year old ex, ok she's older now, who's hair was thick and lustrous, her breasts large and firm, her skin smooth and soft, and her sex drive left me drained and intimidated

i'd say, delete your profile because you made a bad impression; then write a new profile (add a pic if you can, it's a plus)... tell a little about your vanilla life, your wants and needs in the scene and out... also, in the future; try saying what you don't like without making a derogatory comment about the people who fall into those categories... a bad attitude will leave you desperate for a long time


_____________________________

I'm the man your mother warned you about...
if only to keep me to herself.

I'm a male dominant switch whose experienced as a poly sub to a dominant woman
.
Where the fuck do I post?

Proud Owner and Protector of chyldeschylde.

(in reply to UR2Badored)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/20/2007 2:40:38 PM   
peppermint


Posts: 5170
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline
quote:

This listing ROCKS!


I'm glad the listing was helpful to someone. 

(in reply to SnugasaBug)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Help im Desperate - 8/20/2007 5:02:26 PM   
Cuckme4Life


Posts: 168
Joined: 7/8/2005
From: MentallyDeranged,Tn.
Status: offline 		I get the impression that Older Dommes causes you to have a OOHHHH YUCKKKK mentality.
I have served only 2 Dommes in my lifetime. Both were OLDER and i am better for it.  Dont knock it. Older Dommes are where its at. This i promise from experience. My first had 18 years on me. My second had 20.

_____________________________

"Face Your Fears, Live Your Dreams!"-- Nike Corporation

"I will banish them from my kingdom"--- King Willie Herenton, Memphis Tn. Mayor (choke)

(in reply to peppermint)
Profile   Post #: 40
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