Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

The Hard Way


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Polls and Other Random Stupidity >> The Hard Way Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 1:48:28 PM   
LDRandAstarte


Posts: 504
Joined: 12/31/2005
Status: offline 		What are some of the things you have learned "The hard way" in your life....


For instance I have learned;

1. Don't pee on the spark plug of a running lawnmower! This was the only time I have ever "heard" my eyelids slamming shut!

2. Masturbating with BenGay is only for the stoutest of men!

_____________________________

When I die, I want to go like my grandpa who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming in terror like the other three passengers in his car.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 1:50:21 PM   
sappatoti


Posts: 14844
Joined: 10/30/2006
From: the edge of darkness...
Status: offline 		Touching the high voltage section of a CRT-based television that hasn't been sufficiently drained will send a 160 lb man flying backwards for a distance of about 10 feet.

_____________________________

Never mind the man on the edge of the darkness... he means no harm...

"Community, Identity, Stability." ~ A Brave New World, Aldous Huxley, 1932

If you don't like my attitude, QUIT TALKING TO ME!

(in reply to LDRandAstarte)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 1:58:25 PM   
cuffnspankme


Posts: 2812
Joined: 6/14/2007
Status: offline 		Never ask *Is that all you have* or anything along those lines if you are receiving a beating, it leads to some very unwanted results...

_____________________________

I do not know why it is, but the condition of slavery makes a woman very beautiful. It removes inhibitions to the manifestation of her femininity and her deepest needs.

(in reply to sappatoti)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 2:00:16 PM   
FullCircle


Posts: 5713
Joined: 11/24/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LDRandAstarte
1. Don't pee on the spark plug of a running lawnmower! This was the only time I have ever "heard" my eyelids slamming shut!


Begs the question: why did you pee on your lawnmower?

I learnt that baking soda isn’t the same as caster sugar.

_____________________________

∞ ﮒuקּƹɼ ƾɛϰưϫԼ Ƨωιϯϲћ.

(in reply to LDRandAstarte)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 2:08:12 PM   
darchChylde


Posts: 5279
Joined: 9/28/2006
From: Warm Springs, GA but i live in San Francisco.
Status: offline 		never say "i'm bored" to your Dominant

and never assume that She forgot anything (goes for vanilla too)


_____________________________

I'm the man your mother warned you about...
if only to keep me to herself.

I'm a male dominant switch whose experienced as a poly sub to a dominant woman
.
Where the fuck do I post?

Proud Owner and Protector of chyldeschylde.

(in reply to FullCircle)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 2:17:19 PM   
LDRandAstarte


Posts: 504
Joined: 12/31/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FullCircle

quote:

ORIGINAL: LDRandAstarte
1. Don't pee on the spark plug of a running lawnmower! This was the only time I have ever "heard" my eyelids slamming shut!


Begs the question: why did you pee on your lawnmower?

I learnt that baking soda isn’t the same as caster sugar.


I was about 6yo, I really can not remember the thought processes that went into my actions, but the end result was unforgetable.

_____________________________

When I die, I want to go like my grandpa who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming in terror like the other three passengers in his car.

(in reply to FullCircle)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 2:24:37 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		I learned that my horse really would follow me  in jumping across a ditch he was afraid was going to swallow him alive.

I had not counted on him following quite that closely.........

After I jumped I turned to see if he was indeed following. I cannot tell you how fast my life flashed before my eyes as I looked up to see him in mid jump, over me, trying to do the horse splits to avoid landing on me, as he looked down between his front legs with a shocked look on his horse face.

I got so lucky, only a fractured collar bone and a torn shirt.


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to LDRandAstarte)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 2:25:36 PM   
e01n


Posts: 1472
Status: offline 		Well, I think it's from the same episode as "Never whistle while your pissing"

Hard Lesson #1: Chef is right. Even when you can prove him wrong, Chef is right.
Hard Lesson #2: Chef is always Chef, even when wearing a Speedo or other plum smuggler...
Hard Lesson #3: Chefs know how to get good range and force when throwing their knives, but not always accuracy.
Hard Lesson #4: It's better to be accurate than forceful when throwing a 12" kitchen knife
Hard Lesson #5: Restaurant people are some of the kinkiest on the planet and most are kinkier than you can dream of being...

< Message edited by e01n -- 8/20/2007 2:54:31 PM >

(in reply to LDRandAstarte)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 2:27:09 PM   
HydroMaster


Posts: 4786
Joined: 9/24/2005
Status: offline 		When checking the electric fences on your uncle's ranch be ABSOLUTELY sure he turned them off.

_____________________________

I walk the lonely road,
the only one that I have ever known.

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 2:29:10 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		Ohhhh, that reminds me. When trying to fix the electric fence quickly, in the rain, it is better to walk the mile down and shut it off, rather than try to rely on wet leather gloves to deaden the zap.

When taking the quicker route, stepping through the two strands of electric fence wire, rather than going down and throught the gate. If you should stagger a bit, while barefoot in wet grass, and your bare leg just happens to touch one of the strands, it is NOT a good idea to grab a metal fence post to steady yourself....... barefeet, wet grass, electricity, and metal pole.........bad combo. bad bad baaaaaaaaaaaaad.


< Message edited by LaTigresse -- 8/20/2007 2:31:31 PM >

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to HydroMaster)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 2:31:58 PM   
philosophy


Posts: 5284
Joined: 2/15/2004
Status: offline 		...in theatre, being good at improvisation is no substitute for learning the bloody lines.........

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 2:39:46 PM   
beargonewild


Posts: 22716
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		Never sass back at your mom, even mumbling the sarcasm, their hearing is perfect along with their backhand!



_____________________________

Do Not Rile da Chosen Bear

Promiscuous boy you already know
That I’m all yours what you waiting for?

Resident MANWHORE ~1000 Bear pts~

10 NZ points
Whips~n~Cuffs

(in reply to philosophy)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 3:41:08 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		Which reminds me of one my kids learned.

Never assume that because mom is outside and you are inside, she cannot hear you. Then assuming it is safe to swear at one another while arguing over which Saturday morning cartoons to watch.

Followed closely by......Do not tell mom "mmmmmmmmm, that soap tastes good!" after getting your mouth soaped for swearing. You will get a second helping.




_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to beargonewild)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 3:51:54 PM   
HydroMaster


Posts: 4786
Joined: 9/24/2005
Status: offline 		Playing hide and go seek at night wearing all black and masks sometimes attracts unwanted police attention

_____________________________

I walk the lonely road,
the only one that I have ever known.

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 4:07:53 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		Laughing, well yeah, I suppose it might!

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to HydroMaster)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 4:12:56 PM   
callistaIn


Posts: 62
Status: offline 		I learned that the guage on the gas tank is always accurate

that when you use scissors to cut a cord; especially when it's plugged in; you can expect to become up close and personal with a wall ( or in my case, a window )

that telling your parents to shut up is not the way to go about gaining permission for something

that when Master/Mistress says be quiet; they really mean it.

that admitting to a police officer that you spent the afternoon drinking; after he has pulled you over for speeding; is NOT the way to get out of a ticket

just to name a few

best of wishes

callie

(in reply to LDRandAstarte)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 4:29:36 PM   
cautiousiasub


Posts: 199
Joined: 10/17/2005
Status: offline 		Speaking of police officers:

Asking one if they know what those lights on the top of their car are for will only make them mad and therefore look for a reason to ticket you.

Telling them that you thought they followed you to the gas station for donuts will accomplish the same thing.

(in reply to callistaIn)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 5:35:57 PM   
sublimelysensual


Posts: 298
Joined: 7/25/2005
Status: offline 		1. No matter how "shock-proof" you are, your children will always have the ability to shock you with things that come out of their mouth...
 
2. Human beings can fly when running at the correct speed and getting the help of an unseen hole to take off from...
 
3. Betting against Murphy's Law is about the same as betting against the house in a casino..there's a slight chance you may win, but if you do, it's a fluke, and there will be payback...
 
-a

_____________________________

"To make oneself an object, to make oneself passive, is a very different thing from being a passive object." -Simone De Beauvoir -'The Second Sex'

(in reply to cautiousiasub)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 5:43:26 PM   
e01n


Posts: 1472
Status: offline 		A couple of quick cop lessons:
--The Jedi Mind Trick *does* work on them... but only if you're prepared with something to distract them while patting you down *before* they get to the pocket in which you're holding...
--Cops are either Subs who top or Doms who sub, and never switch anything.
--Never clean your house while wearing a balaclava over your face "because of allergies" while the blinds are open.
--"Libertarian" = "pot head" to most patrol cops. So pamphlets for the LP = drug paraphernalia to them.
--Be nice to them. They richly deserve it, given the shit they get handed most of the time.

(in reply to sublimelysensual)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: The Hard Way - 8/20/2007 6:15:40 PM   
thornhappy


Posts: 8596
Joined: 12/16/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: HydroMaster

When checking the electric fences on your uncle's ranch be ABSOLUTELY sure he turned them off.

Several cousins of mine can state: never pee on the electric fence.

Thornhappy's commandments: 
Touch not the spark plug wire on a running engine.
Touch not the screws on that 110VAC plug.  (That buzzing sensation...ewwww.)
Touch not the 300 VDC power supply on the repeater, with one hand on the rack.  (All I could do was squawk for a few minutes after.)

thornhappy


(in reply to HydroMaster)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Polls and Other Random Stupidity >> The Hard Way Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094