Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney?

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Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/6/2005 7:22:07 PM

sexysubbunny

Posts: 145
Status: offline

i have a question that i hope i might get some feedback from?
i have recently (1 mo ) ago have been chatting with emails from a Dom/Master, so he says!
i am wondering if he is for real or just playing games?
" I HAVE PROBABLY ALREADY ANSWERED MY OWN ??? TO YOU ALL "
but i will lay this out to you..........anyway!!

he ran accross my profile on AFF and initially emailed me saying he was interested! ok, we exchanged emails back and forth, with kind words, he more or less stated a demand that i either call Him "Sir" or "Mr. Williams" i can't get a first name from him.......he has promised to send me a face pic which i have been more than patient in waiting going on 3 wks now!
he says he wants to spend His summer with me.......well to say the least, the summer is dwindling away and we can't even connect online in a chat... he won't download messenger or any of them so we can connect!
He is somewhat "cocky" with me in His words and email talk that he does; and i have found it interesting ( to a point ) and there for a while i was liking it, but this has come to concern me very much, he stays away for days and will send me an email after i have gone to bed........on different places, AFF or ALT or yahoo mail!
Asking me about what toys i own or have, what i like in the lifestyle, but yet he won't share anything with me!
i am beginning to wonder if he just wants an intermittent online email scene with me and one that he can do when he finds the time for me.
i am beginning to feel non-interested and have sent him an email with my concerns to him! AS of today!
I have asked him kindly if he is trying to hide something and i asked why he is being so "secrative"....??
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
my intentions tell me he is not a real or genuine Dom!!
but one that plays games......but what is he getting out of it!?
he won't be getting anymore from me, as i have been turned off by this and have told him so!
i would just like your opinion as to what you all feel is happening?
He once quoted to me: "this is going to be FUN"..........

my search continues.........!! Just another one bites the dust!! LOL

have a nice evening and thanks in advance for your input!!

bunny

< Message edited by sexysubbunny -- 7/6/2005 7:26:20 PM >

_____________________________

~ SUBMISSION, it's my way of Life and it's Beautiful ~

Post #: 1

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/6/2005 7:26:00 PM

MistressFire70

Posts: 378
Joined: 7/25/2004
From: North Carolina
Status: offline

Bottom line...follow your gut. If he's creeping you out, then he's a creep! Unless you like creeps (which we can see you don't), there's not much of a match there. I hope you have better luck!

Fire

_____________________________

you have come to a great chasm. Jump. It's not as wide as you think.

(in reply to sexysubbunny)

Post #: 2

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/6/2005 7:26:56 PM

quietkitten

Posts: 1082
Joined: 2/5/2005
From: Alberta, Canada
Status: offline

Sounds pretty fishy

If he is not willling to give you any information and is demanding information from you, I would be suspecting he is not who he says he is.

(in reply to sexysubbunny)

Post #: 3

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/6/2005 7:31:54 PM

sexysubbunny

Posts: 145
Status: offline

hello mistressfire and quietkitten

i really do appreciate your advice here even more...! i have already made my decision with this phoney game player and i will not be his fool!
Your kind input means alot to me and i do hope to get more responses!!

Much thanks, bunny

_____________________________

~ SUBMISSION, it's my way of Life and it's Beautiful ~

(in reply to sexysubbunny)

Post #: 4

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/6/2005 7:35:46 PM

Atavist

Posts: 124
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline

Isn't it a bit odd to you when a guy "demands" that you call him "Master"????

(in reply to sexysubbunny)

Post #: 5

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/6/2005 7:45:53 PM

quietkitten

Posts: 1082
Joined: 2/5/2005
From: Alberta, Canada
Status: offline

No problem sexysubbunny and by the way .. welcome to the forums

(in reply to Atavist)

Post #: 6

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/6/2005 7:57:08 PM

EmeraldSlave2

Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

I would just ask myself "Is this how I want my life to be like for the next six months? 5 years? Forever?"

You seem to be attracted to this type though Sexy.

(in reply to sexysubbunny)

Post #: 7

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/6/2005 8:07:51 PM

sexysubbunny

Posts: 145
Status: offline

ahhhh yes it is, very much so!! i caught that right away and i felt it was ODD that he won't tell me his first name!!
ohhhhhhhhh gosh!!!!!!!!!!

all i can say is bunny is walking....................
far, far away !!
LOL................................

_____________________________

~ SUBMISSION, it's my way of Life and it's Beautiful ~

(in reply to Atavist)

Post #: 8

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/6/2005 8:11:40 PM

sexysubbunny

Posts: 145
Status: offline

hi emerald
but i must say i do catch on quickly since my ONE bad situation!
i see red flags all the time now............i just wanted to share this with you all and hear your input!!
oh believe, me i seen it right away and i wouldnt say that this bunny would ever desire to have a Dom/Master of this sort, she respects herself too much to allow BS like this from anyone!

thanks for your sharing with me emerald!

my future holds the "attraction" of a Good and HONEST Dom/Master from here on out!!
a hard lesson was learned!!

but it made me stronger because of it!

_____________________________

~ SUBMISSION, it's my way of Life and it's Beautiful ~

(in reply to EmeraldSlave2)

Post #: 9

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/6/2005 8:44:17 PM

Kinkypupper

Posts: 713
Joined: 9/26/2004
From: Portland oregon
Status: offline

He may be more phoney then real. Or he is a newbe and has gotten wet feet.

The biggest key is that there is no photo. and no intent on his part to be more communicative..
My guess he is a wanna be who is married...

sorry :-(

_____________________________

Phil Moulton
A Sensual Touch
Locopony Racing
Portland Oregon

(in reply to sexysubbunny)

Post #: 10

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/6/2005 8:56:47 PM

slatyb

Posts: 43
Joined: 1/17/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexysubbunny

i have a question that i hope i might get some feedback from?
i have recently (1 mo ) ago have been chatting with emails from a Dom/Master, so he says!
i am wondering if he is for real or just playing games?
" I HAVE PROBABLY ALREADY ANSWERED MY OWN ??? TO YOU ALL "
but i will lay this out to you..........anyway!!

he ran accross my profile on AFF and initially emailed me saying he was interested! ok, we exchanged emails back and forth, with kind words, he more or less stated a demand that i either call Him "Sir" or "Mr. Williams" i can't get a first name from him.......he has promised to send me a face pic which i have been more than patient in waiting going on 3 wks now!

There isn't some special set of rules that you can apply to separate the "Real Doms" from the rest. Nor are "Real Doms" some special class of people who are exempt from extending normal courtesies to strangers.

Right now, you have no relationship with this guy, and you should expect common courtesy until you have a mutual agreement to do something else. So far, what you know is that he has failed to keep his promise to send a picture, and is generally witholding information that would normally have been exchanged by now. Your feeling is that this guy is bad news. You should listen to your feelings.

(in reply to sexysubbunny)

Post #: 11

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/7/2005 5:43:48 AM

Youcantmakemeeee

Posts: 36
Joined: 7/4/2005
Status: offline

After reading your post, it was obvious that you did indeed answer your own question. So, I suppose you're looking for validation regarding your feelings.

First, let me say that there is no one way in D/s. What may work for one may be completely out of the question for another. Whether someone is really dominant/submissive/switch is subjective. With that said however there are certain things one might want to disect a little more.

Any man that insists I call him Sir, Mr., or any other such title without a deeper foundation that just talking online or on the phone is not my idea of what I want in a dominant, even if I had his first name or picture. I don't just call anyone those things and the dominant that I want to be with will see that and appreciate that I haven't been running around doing so. This is not to say that others who do this are wrong. They simply are looking for something different than I am. No biggie.

One of my biggest pet peeves is when someone says they will do something and then doesn't follow through. I wouldn't have waited this long for a picture. It costs less than twenty dollars to go buy a disposable camera and get the pictures on a cd to upload on one's computer.

I also wouldn't be with someone who asked more from me than he himself would give.

What he is doing is anyone's guess. We can't really know his life or his thoughts. But his behavior does tell you something or else you wouldn't have had so many concerns. I agree with the others, trust your judgement and don't waste your time.

C.

______________

"Then he said my name, ..., and I understood what gives cats the urge to purr."

(in reply to sexysubbunny)

Post #: 12

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/7/2005 6:40:10 AM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Atavist

Isn't it a bit odd to you when a guy "demands" that you call him "Master"????

Exactly my thoughts. It happens to be a pet peeve of mine. You're a sub, not his sub. My view has always been that until something is negotiated a Dom has no right to make demands. I also view "Sir" as a sign of respect, and I won't use it until you've earned my respect. And Master....well, I don't call anyone Master except the one who is my Master.

My instinct is that he's a wannabe. But, I really hate when someone says "true" Dom or sub. What I consider to be an ideal Dom isprobably different than yours, so therefore there is no "true" Dom.

B~

(in reply to Atavist)

Post #: 13

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/7/2005 8:09:44 AM

Gemeni

Posts: 255
Joined: 2/19/2005
Status: offline

"Real" Doms have enough confidence to pursue things in the correct order.

Friends first.

Then lovers if it goes that far.

Then defined roles.

Anyone who puts the cart before the horse is usually an ass.

(in reply to OsideGirl)

Post #: 14

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/7/2005 8:11:46 AM

subcheryl

Posts: 280
Joined: 11/2/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: slatyb

[

Right now, you have no relationship with this guy, and you should expect common courtesy until you have a mutual agreement to do something else. So far, what you know is that he has failed to keep his promise to send a picture, and is generally witholding information that would normally have been exchanged by now. Your feeling is that this guy is bad news. You should listen to your feelings.

Bunny this is another good pt., by the way I wrote to you on the otherside, if he can't keep a simple promise of sending a pic, will he be able to keep more important promises to you. I know this isn't your kind hugs from me to you

(in reply to slatyb)

Post #: 15

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/7/2005 11:53:27 AM

hullman

Posts: 12
Joined: 7/6/2005
Status: offline

hi there is he real NO WAY as a true dom i would want to know about you first to see how you project yourself, also swap photos so we would know who we are talking to.
it makes me sick these players who ruin it for us true doms and also scares the subs seeking there do, as they lose confidence for a while, i would say ive nothing to hide go and see my profile and if you dont like thats ok

master hullman

(in reply to subcheryl)

Post #: 16

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/7/2005 12:55:05 PM

MHOO314

Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline

remember, until you agree that any one--sub or dominant is who you chose--you are still looking, there is no obligation for you to acquiese until you get some assurances that this person is real. I am so with all these responses though--be very careful, there are lots of weirdos out there.

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor

(in reply to Atavist)

Post #: 17

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/7/2005 1:03:47 PM

LadyKim

Posts: 191
Joined: 11/11/2004
Status: offline

As in everything, there could be legitimate explanations for everything he has done.

With that said, people who demand the use of a title being used are usually fairly new to the role, online players that use the cyber title to get their jollies cause they are too scared to try real time, lack confidence in who or what they are, or just plain fakes.

Reading the information you provided left me thinking he's married and using this as a forum to fill some void in that relationship; however, without really knowing I couldn't say for sure if that is the case.

Most people that are serious in this lifestyle know that trust and respect are two componants that have to be built not fabricated. It is pretty obvious by your post that you are not feeling either of those for him, so it would not appear he is the right person for you.

So does it really matter if he's real or fake?

(in reply to MHOO314)

Post #: 18

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/7/2005 5:52:58 PM

sexysubbunny

Posts: 145
Status: offline

a big thank you to everyone who has posted a comment to my concerns on this board!
yes, i believe i was looking for validation in my fears that he was not for real!
my short, but to the point email to him now 4 days ago....has left him with no response and so that proves even more to me......he was hiding something, "maybe a wife"............something not good and something that i Don't want in my Dom........... the RED FLAGS flew and this bunny ran!!

thank you all so much for your honesty and thougths here!
they are very much apprecaited!

PS: hello my sweet sister sub Cheryl, so sweet of you to respond here!!
i hear ya girl........a man of his Word is very important to me and broken promises make me sick!
your kindness is apprecaited dear sister...........thank you!!
i'll see you on the "otheside"...................winks....

bunny

< Message edited by sexysubbunny -- 7/7/2005 5:56:30 PM >

_____________________________

~ SUBMISSION, it's my way of Life and it's Beautiful ~

(in reply to sexysubbunny)

Post #: 19

RE: Is he a Real True Dom/Master or a phoney? - 7/7/2005 9:17:34 PM

Mani2005

Posts: 4
Joined: 4/19/2005
Status: offline

I don't think the right question is whether he is a "Real True Dom/Master or a phoney". That requires a judgment that you are in no place to make. The real question, is this ever going to go anywhere? One reason it may not is because he is a phoney. But he might be very real and true, and simply not interested in you. Or he may enjoy toying with you, cat-and-mouse-like.

That being said: surely you are getting nothing from this relationship so far. If that is so, then tell him simply and straightforwardly: "Dominate me, or don't". Bring the issue to a head. It isn't that hard to do.

(in reply to sexysubbunny)

Post #: 20

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