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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/6/2007 3:20:05 PM

NorthernGent

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SusanofO

NorthernGent: Oh yeah. Quite possibly that's true, I agree.

- Susan

'Dunno, don't know the bloke, but it's a possibility.

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/6/2007 3:27:40 PM

Stephann

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Hi caitlyn,

What you forgot to fill us in with is "are you enjoying it?"

If you're having fun too, then why worry about it? Unless you're planning to run for President someday

Think of it this way; would you rather he be an opera box commando? Or dragging you to every auto convention in West Texas? I'd say it sounds like you're having a lot of fun, and thinking you shouldn't. Hell, you mentioned once that you've even gotten up there and shaken it.

If it gets old, tell him it's getting old. Having worked in a club, I know the regulars end up seeing the people there as 'bar friends' and less as 'sex fantasies.' It sounds like this guy is like that. Roll with it, and have a blast; just be careful with the cameras.

Stephan

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/6/2007 5:47:45 PM

SusanofO

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All due respect, but I got the impression she thought it was fine for awhile, but "enough is enough" already. I also had the impression that his assuming she'd not mind, and not asking her if it did, bothered her a little. I could be wrong about that, though.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 9/6/2007 5:49:38 PM >

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/6/2007 6:10:59 PM

Stephann

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SusanofO

All due respect, but I got the impression she thought it was fine for awhile, but "enough is enough" already. I also had the impression that his assuming she'd not mind, and not asking her if it did, bothered her a little. I could be wrong about that, though.

- Susan

Hi Susan,

It's all quite possible. Yet everything I've ever seen from caitlyn's posts suggest that she's pretty capable of saying "I'm sick of this" either directly, or by just ducking his company.

Nothing in her posts said "I'm not enjoying myself" that I could see. I think it's more to do with the social stigma (yes, even here in Texas) against a man who spends more than one night a month in a strip club, who (gasp) even brings his date to a strip club.

I've had three dates off hand, that I brought to a strip club. Each date went very, very well. Each was rather early in the relationship, and each relationship lasted a good long while. Yet, aside from my time working as a DJ in one, I never visited any frequently enough to be 'known by name.'

So the vibe I get, is questioning if she's supposed to think this is strange. If you have to ask... well, it probably isn't. Especially this early on. If it does become an old hat, she can just tell him "time for us to do something different tonight."

Warm regards,

Stephan

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/6/2007 6:17:06 PM

SusanofO

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You could be right, I agree, Stephann. I wasn't completely clear on how she felt about it all, and my own ideas of what I'd do in that situation could well be coloring my POV.

I think maybe I was being "protective", too, because I have a niece who is exactly caitlyn's age.

In any case, I hope she gets something out of this thread, and the situation works out well for her, and-or she learns something from it.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 9/6/2007 6:19:28 PM >

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/6/2007 6:27:04 PM

SugarMyChurro

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I agree with SusanofO (Post #23) for now - without further clarification from the OP.

Caitlyn:

Is this vanilla or Dom-sub? I think it makes a difference. Part of what's at stake is simply this, Caitlyn: do you want to continue with someone that wants those things? Would you beg his collar? Etc. Is it a small price or a big price to pay for a man whose company you enjoy so well? Maybe you just don't want to be included in these outings?

This is also the same with anyone that has an interest you don't share, or maybe can only handle in small quantities. My slave is an avid online gamer (Warcraft or some shit) and while I am interested in her adventures and allow her time to indulge that interest, it does nearly nothing for me. So it's time that is allowed and which we knowingly spend apart.

But I encourage these private hobbies. It allows me time for my own interests also.

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/6/2007 6:36:19 PM

leatherette

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Hi,

No it isn't bizzarro, you know that. The fact that is bothering you enough to feel concern is the question, ya know?

There must be something about: the way he ALWAYS ends up there, is a regular, spills cash all over or.. maybe he needs to "look down" on a girl.. in a not so good way.. could be a "red flag" stirring inside that you just don't have enough information yet.

Now, I like strip clubs. Think it is hot to go with a man on a date to one. I love it when the girls fuss over us girls...
I'm sure he is proud to show you off, has fantasies of you up there, with another woman etc..

BUT... if you are worried - just see what develops as you have fun etc. Clearly: you are no prude, so that isn't an issue. There has got to be an underlying nagging ...something, right?

There are people addicted to porn, strip joints, hookers + and MUST have that stimulation. It could be his kink.

No way to know yet. You will know. You'll know how you feel. What his passion or insecurity is... a month is not long enough to know the truth or make any judgement or decision.

Do talk to him.

Best of luck! leatherette

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/6/2007 6:39:37 PM

shyinini

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Caitlyn... you are so freekin funny sweetie....

does he get ya drunk first or wait till the end?

shy, once D's whore

I got smart tho !

Sir's cherished cumsucking girl

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/6/2007 6:47:31 PM

UtopianRanger

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quote:

ORIGINAL: caitlyn

I can't remember ever asking for advice or opinions about personal matters on this board, so perhaps I will be spared the 'drama queen' tag.

I've been seeing this new guy for a little over a month, ... and he loves, loves, loves, him 'some strip club. He has a VIP pass to several very swank clubs in the Houston area, and whenever we go out, we usually end up there ... not that we don't go other places, as a matter of fact this guy breaks my old record for dates that take me to cool places ... but we always seem to end up at a strip club, in the VIP area, with me getting shitfaced, and both of us getting a bunch of table dances from various dancers.

I don't even know what to think of this. It might be weird, and it might be not. I'll admit that the first time we went, I felt a little strange ... everyone knows him, and it's clear he's a regular. This isn't the first guy I've dated that's a 'Titty-Bar Commando", but he's the first one that seemed bent of taking me along, and doing whatever he can to get me felt up by every girl in the place. All this, keeping in mind that he's a super classy, educated man that treats me like any girl would die to be treated.

I'm lost. Does anyone think this is mucho-bizarro? Is there some message that I'm missing? Is this just good clean fun, and I shouldn't be bothered in the least?

Sorry for the personal post ... I'm not quite sure I have anyone in my life I would enjoy talking this over with ... if you get my drift.

As someone who owned a sports bar for nearly ten years that sat down the street from topless club - I liken the male clientele to the skanky girls with crooked teeth and tattoo’s who gave lap dances and rubbed up against a barber pole.

I never took any of my lady friends there.

- R

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/6/2007 9:22:25 PM

SusanofO

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I've seen some pretty classy looking Strip clubs in Las Vegas, but generally (in the town I am from anyway) they are not exactly upper-crust kinds of bars (maybe they are a lot nicer in Houston, I dunno), and yeah, in my town also, the women who work in them have hot bodies covered with things like tattoos, and may be missing teeth.

Maybe this is his "hobby" but like SMC said, that doesn't mean you necessarily have to share it every time he goes there, does it?

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 9/6/2007 10:00:16 PM >

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/6/2007 9:34:00 PM

slaveboyforyou

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They are all sleaze pits around here. Strip clubs aren't allowed to sell alcohol, only set ups here. So the only time I ever went to them was when I was younger with friends. We went to get hammered cheaply, and to make general asses out of ourselves. We even used to make bets on who would start a fight or get us kicked out first. I would never dream of taking a date to one of them. I would not take pride in being a known regular when I walked in the door.

< Message edited by slaveboyforyou -- 9/6/2007 9:35:09 PM >

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/6/2007 9:46:22 PM

caitlyn

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I'm very impressed with the range and depth of the responses, and would like to thank everyone that participated.

I can't say that I'm freaked out or bothered. It's his money, and I always seem to have a great time, so it's no worries. I guess where I come from, is wondering if it's a little strange or even disfunctional ... keeping in mind that 'disfunctional relationships' is my middle name.

Many of the responses were accurate representations of my feelings. I think in the end, I'm going to choose to not be judgmental, and go with the flow. I don't think I'll say anything to him. That comes a little too close to the inner truth for me ... I really only date at all, because I want to party and not have to drive.

< Message edited by caitlyn -- 9/6/2007 9:47:57 PM >

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/6/2007 9:48:05 PM

SusanofO

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Well good luck caitlyn. Have fun.

- Susan

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/6/2007 9:50:27 PM

caitlyn

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SusanofO
Well good luck caitlyn. Have fun.

I bet you never thought I was this shallow. At least I gave Mother Theresa half a chance.

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/6/2007 9:54:16 PM

SusanofO

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Yes (I appreciated that, too, btw)

No, I think you're 21 and want to have a good time. When I was 21 all I did, practically, was go to bars. I am amazed I am still living at my ripe old age, as a matter of fact. Enjoy yourself - that is what being 21 is a lot about, IMO.

Just remember not to burn too many brain cells out via alcohol embibing. It would be a shame, IMO, to let that amazing brain of yours waste away.

Ah well, enough lecturing. Hope you enjoy yourself, caitlyn.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 9/6/2007 9:59:26 PM >

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/6/2007 9:57:16 PM

domiguy

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I'm a fucking prude....I just don't dig strip joints...They can be fun every now and again....It is a much more enjoyable experience if I go with a woman....Personally I dig the sleezy strip joints....The kind that when the stripper hangs from the pole that it is likely that it might snap. Cellulite is mandatory, stretch marks the routine and track marks are applauded. The smell of old booze and gutter snatch oozes through the place like a urinal gone bad.

As I catch their toothless grins, I keep telling myself that they are all paying their way through med school and to stop being such a judgmental prick.

Oh by the way, Caitlyn, nice catch.

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/6/2007 10:20:51 PM

luckydog1

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Maybe the guy wants you to dance for him at home.

Possible answer also, do you know where he gets his money? It is possible he is slinging Blow (or something) when he stops in, while you are shitfaced with a hot chick gyrating in your face.

I noticed something interesting about strip clubs a few years ago. I was working as a Personal assistant (part time) for a disabled 50 year old man. He had been wheelchair bound his entire life, but was 100% functioning mentally--So my my job was to assist him in doing what he wanted, not encourage (make) him make good choices. And what he liked to was drink Tequila, sing Kareoke, and watch strippers. We have both kinds of Strip Clubs here in Anchorage--Incredibly Hot women many of whom are actually in school and toothless crack whores that are not erotic at all. He liked Pjs (Nasty Toothless biker bitches), I was nervous sitting down in there, So I pushed for him to go to a better one. The hot girls were incredibly rude and insulting to him, one actually refused to look at him or take his money. while the Pjs girls loved the guy and doted on him( he was cheap with his bills also, so they were not being nice for $).

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/6/2007 10:32:21 PM

SusanofO

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I can imagine that happening, sorry to say. Okay, yay for the toothless crack whore strippers, then. I realize we are all people, and some of them undoubtedly have hearts of gold. I am sorry if I sounded judgmental, I should not have been. Sorry (really).

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 9/6/2007 10:33:51 PM >

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/7/2007 12:36:13 AM

UtopianRanger

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quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

I'm a fucking prude....I just don't dig strip joints...They can be fun every now and again....It is a much more enjoyable experience if I go with a woman....Personally I dig the sleezy strip joints....The kind that when the stripper hangs from the pole that it is likely that it might snap. Cellulite is mandatory, stretch marks the routine and track marks are applauded. The smell of old booze and gutter snatch oozes through the place like a urinal gone bad.

As I catch their toothless grins, I keep telling myself that they are all paying their way through med school and to stop being such a judgmental prick.

Oh by the way, Caitlyn, nice catch.

Well gosh golly darn gee......

If we all could only be as cool as you - You're my absolute hero, dude

- R

_____________________________

"If you are going to win any battle, you have to do one thing. You have to make the mind run the body. Never let the body tell the mind what to do... the body is never tired if the mind is not tired."

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RE: Personal: Advice, Opinions or Whatever ... - 9/7/2007 2:43:51 AM

SugarMyChurro

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FWIW, I have been to some strip clubs in Texas and the women there were very nice looking in terms of what the clientele would have wanted and expected. I did not see toothless grins nor any significant tattooing. The girl's looked like "girl next door" types. Most were slightly too slender for me, but I would imagine that most of them were perfect for everyone else.

Personally, I don't like strip clubs much at all. The arrangement is simply too artificial and forced for my tastes.

But the last time I was a strip club I was with an ex-girlfriend (my girlfriend at that time) and she really enjoyed the experience a lot. She was hot as hell by the time we got home.

So there's no rules here. I just think it's a matter of what one likes or dislikes.

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