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RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/18/2005 7:53:17 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

"The best slaves are not the born-submissives, but strong Dominant people who make a conscious choice to put the needs and service of another as their highest priority." (Sheryl Dee) I so very much agree with that statement.


Oh I like it too!

- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to MsPurrmeow)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/19/2005 10:46:55 AM   
blue^elf


Posts: 11
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline 		My best Domme friend here in Norway is now married to a Dom. I don't know if they would play together. They don't have a submissive now. But I do know that they are happy together. They are definitely both dominant. But the love they have for each other is more important to them than the D/s.

I talked a little with the Domme about this, because it obviously can seem a bit unusual that two dominants can live together. But it works for them. They have their dominant side, but in everyday life, I think they are living mostly vanilla, and are happy with that. They have both got many silly comments from other SM'ers who can't understand that they can't live together without one of them going submissive. But it feels natural for the couple. It's give and take, just like for any other couple.

The Dom is (as far as I know) straight, and the Domme is bisexual, so if they were going to get a submissive, it would probably be a femsub. Me being a male sub, I am just friends with them and am happy with that. :)

(in reply to fastlane)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/19/2005 11:55:01 AM   
UtopianRanger


Posts: 3251
Status: offline
quote:

I go more for tall, handsome, italian leather suit, slightly arrogant and smug. Now THERE is a fine catch! (in my evil opinion of course)


Forget the leather. How bout a real Sicilian, in a John Gotti style, shark-skin Gucci blazer, who would take you to an old-school Guinea joint and corece the owner {because he speaks a little of the language} into making sure we get the best table in the house? HAR!




- The Ranger

< Message edited by UtopianRanger -- 7/19/2005 12:17:50 PM >

_____________________________

"If you are going to win any battle, you have to do one thing. You have to make the mind run the body. Never let the body tell the mind what to do... the body is never tired if the mind is not tired."

-General George S. Patton


(in reply to LadyAngelika)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/19/2005 2:45:47 PM   
MsElle


Posts: 20
Joined: 4/1/2005
Status: offline 		First I'd have to say that YES it is very possible, and for me it is the only way. I have a dominant male partner and we have an amazing relationship that is not in any way fettered by ego or insecurity or power struggle - we have slaves that serve us both and that arrangement is completely satisfying for our dominant natures. I could never have a romantic relationship with a submissive, it's not about them being 'unequal' to me - everyone is equal as people - but the personality match would be very unbalanced and I would never feel it to be a true partnership.

The difficulty in having an arrangement like mine is that the D/s relationship is, for many submissives (and dominants as well I assume) also an inherently romantic/love-based one. For me that's simply not the case. But if you want a monogamous romantic relationship with your Mistress, then having a Mistress with a serious relationship with a Dom is going to inevitably lead to jealousy and unhappiness. It's also true that there are many male slaves who have hang ups about the idea of serving or submitting to a male, which is just an unfortunate reality, but the truly open-minded ones see serving my male partner as an extension of their service to me, and something that pleases me.

The real point here for me is that they are separate, but equally important, needs in my life. I need to have the matched personalities and equal partnership in a loving and committed, passionate, erotic, romantic relationship with another Dominant - but I also need to have the dynamic physical and psychological power exchange, the erotic fulfillment, and the kinky satisfaction of a Mistress/slave relationship with a submissive. Either one can simply never satisfy the other's role.

And as for Lady Angelika... I sooooo agree. I think of that as a dominant male who just needs an even more dominant female to put him in his place *evil grin* such fun!

~Elle

(in reply to LadyAngelika)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/19/2005 4:09:40 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: UtopianRanger

quote:

I go more for tall, handsome, italian leather suit, slightly arrogant and smug. Now THERE is a fine catch! (in my evil opinion of course)


Forget the leather. How bout a real Sicilian, in a John Gotti style, shark-skin Gucci blazer, who would take you to an old-school Guinea joint and corece the owner {because he speaks a little of the language} into making sure we get the best table in the house? HAR!

- The Ranger


I have to stop posting so late at night when I'm almost cross eyed. Fine fabric "Italian suits" and "Italian leather shoes". I'll save the Italian leather suits for the dungeon! ;)

And sure Ranger, when are you picking me up? <bats eyelashes sweetly>.

- LA


_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to UtopianRanger)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/19/2005 4:10:37 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

And as for Lady Angelika... I sooooo agree. I think of that as a dominant male who just needs an even more dominant female to put him in his place *evil grin* such fun!


So you are putting Tag in his place, huh? ;)

- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to MsElle)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/19/2005 4:22:18 PM   
MsElle


Posts: 20
Joined: 4/1/2005
Status: offline 		LOL - I didn't mean him. Surely you jest ;)

~MsElle

(in reply to LadyAngelika)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/19/2005 8:32:46 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsElle
And as for Lady Angelika... I sooooo agree. I think of that as a dominant male who just needs an even more dominant female to put him in his place *evil grin* such fun!
~Elle

It must be my inexperience... Some days I feel very much like an amateur, but I don't get the "putting a dominant personality in his place." I admit that there are plenty of men who when madly in love will do anything for his lady; and in that case, putting him in his place is as easy as telling him when to breathe and when to hold his breath... When not in that kind of relationship, I don't know how that works really... M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to MsElle)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/20/2005 6:29:34 PM   
fastlane


Posts: 2159
Joined: 5/26/2005
Status: offline 		I'm cooking Lasagne and taking off this suit, as I pop the cork of a fine wine....Damn, wish I could make someone whine tonight!

_____________________________

Just because it hurts, doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing.

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/21/2005 6:55:44 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsElle
And as for Lady Angelika... I sooooo agree. I think of that as a dominant male who just needs an even more dominant female to put him in his place *evil grin* such fun!
~Elle

It must be my inexperience... Some days I feel very much like an amateur, but I don't get the "putting a dominant personality in his place."


Think of it like a nice game of tug-o-war ;)

- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/21/2005 11:18:22 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika
quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig
but I don't get the "putting a dominant personality in his place."

Think of it like a nice game of tug-o-war ;)
- LA
I think I've done it... Felt a lot like manipulation and power struggles. I didn't like it much, especially since he would come back with "did you really mean what you said when..."
Thanks for the reply though, M

< Message edited by BlkTallFullfig -- 7/22/2005 2:25:31 AM >

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to LadyAngelika)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/22/2005 5:28:11 AM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika
quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig
but I don't get the "putting a dominant personality in his place."

Think of it like a nice game of tug-o-war ;)
- LA
I think I've done it... Felt a lot like manipulation and power struggles. I didn't like it much, especially since he would come back with "did you really mean what you said when..."
Thanks for the reply though, M

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again? ;)
I admit it can feel like a power struggle. So did most of the relationships where I wasn't compatible with someone. But when you are matched with someone who is relatively dominant and compatible with you, you feel support, not struggle.

- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/22/2005 7:44:08 PM   
MsPurrmeow


Posts: 261
Joined: 10/30/2004
Status: offline 		It appears that the issue comes down to making a decision and working with it, without regard to egotism. I believe that people can function in a completely neutral sense. D/s roles do not dictate that someone is treating someone else like crap.

My issue comes up when people try to play power games where none are necessary. I do not have a NEED to dominate another person in my daily life or family. I do not "dominate" as a verb. Dominant is simply who I am. It is a tendency I have to take a position in a situation of simply handling the data and doing the things or making the tough decisions that are required for accomplishment. That does not make me dominant or submissive in my relationships, it simply makes me a partner.

The partner to whom I will be Dominant and Dominate(verb) is one with whom we have chosen that path as two strong human beings who care for one another. Without that, I am simply a partner and I will contribute in whatever capacity I can be.

(in reply to LadyAngelika)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/23/2005 1:04:09 AM   
MadameG


Posts: 8
Joined: 2/10/2005
Status: offline 		I am married to my co-dominant who runs our leather household with me. It is not easy but I prefer it to my submissives being my primary due to the power equality factor.

Miss Simone

(in reply to fastlane)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/23/2005 9:02:37 PM   
Kindred2Evil


Posts: 227
Joined: 4/16/2005
Status: offline 		I'm married to a Dom and we've found a way to make it all work. We've been together for about 4 years now. It took some doing, a lot of communication, but we found our middle ground. The house is mine, I do as I please with it, he takes care of the yardwork, and things of that nature. I'm actually a very spoiled woman *laughs* He cooks, he'll do dishes and laundry just like I do. We tend to split everything pretty fairly for the most part. I think it's all a matter of how you go about things. I was married previously to a very submissive man, to be honest, it wore me out. The marriage didn't last as long as we'd dated.
As with any relationship, communication is key

_____________________________

Her touch is on the breeze that brushes your cheek, Her voice rides the thunder as the storm breaks, Her tears will clean your heartache when the rains come, Her sun will light the darkest times when you feel alone...She is the Goddess.

(in reply to MadameG)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/24/2005 11:52:36 PM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SadisticPrincess

Actually, I am only content with another dominant as a romantic partner. How else is a partnership of equals really possible? It works quite well, really.


I find the same thing myself. I've had a dominant as a partner and we were truly, partners in crime. Made co-topping scenes that much more of a mindfuck to many, since we thought as one.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to SadisticPrincess)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/25/2005 5:19:19 AM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

My issue comes up when people try to play power games where none are necessary. I do not have a NEED to dominate another person in my daily life or family. I do not "dominate" as a verb. Dominant is simply who I am.


Very well said. I share this perspective with you 100%!

- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to MsPurrmeow)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/25/2005 3:08:52 PM   
TiNeedsHouseboy


Posts: 145
Joined: 4/24/2005
From: Big Apple blossom blown to The Windy City
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: UtopianRanger
Forget the leather. How bout a real Sicilian, in a John Gotti style, shark-skin Gucci blazer, who would take you to an old-school Guinea joint and corece the owner {because he speaks a little of the language} into making sure we get the best table in the house? HAR!
- The Ranger


And har-har-hardy-har-har to you!


Per my post elsewhere about not needing a sub to spend money to demo his attachment, why would I need you to take me, when I can go to "Spaghetti Park" in Queens, and take myself to just such a place? I know the food and service are fabulous. It's "family" owned -- a la "The Godfather" sorta family.

For those of you outside the New York City area, Spaghetti Park is a small area in Corona (a town in Queens -- one of New York City's boroughs), where men still play bocci in the park.

When I brought my sidekick/boyfriend/partner to New York to meet my parents, guess where they chose to go to dinner?

~ Ti ~

P.S. I adore their veal rollatini. How are your veal rollatini creation talents?
(Far more impressive/meaningful if you can cook and serve it to me, as opposed to buying it at a restaurant.)


(in reply to LadyAngelika)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/25/2005 5:48:24 PM   
UtopianRanger


Posts: 3251
Status: offline 		Ok......You can go to ''Spaghetti Park'' and I'll take Lady A to Spark's in midtown. HAR!

As far as the veal rollatini......The best you'll get out me right now is a little tortellini with butter and parmesan, and pot roast cooked slow on the ole' Webber - I hate to disappoint you.

Cooking is not my forte, but knowing where the good cooks are, is! And since I don't mind the expense, I'm down for a good eating place every chance I get.


- The Ranger

< Message edited by UtopianRanger -- 7/25/2005 5:49:41 PM >

_____________________________

"If you are going to win any battle, you have to do one thing. You have to make the mind run the body. Never let the body tell the mind what to do... the body is never tired if the mind is not tired."

-General George S. Patton


(in reply to TiNeedsHouseboy)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Femdommes and Male Domes - 7/25/2005 6:14:13 PM   
fastlane


Posts: 2159
Joined: 5/26/2005
Status: offline 		I've never been more confused in my life.
Well except for that time I thought she was a she and she was a he.


_____________________________

Just because it hurts, doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing.

(in reply to UtopianRanger)
Profile   Post #: 40
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