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Aimtoplease101 -> RE: Dommes And Body Image (10/2/2007 11:29:21 PM)
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This isn't a new thought, but I figured I'd chime in anyway.
People can be very cruel and hurtful when making comments about another's body image, and women seem to be particularly sensitized to such criticism in our culture.
However, it is very true-- as many here have already stated-- that how you act and what you do is a lot more critical to determine how sexy and attractive you are than mere physical presentation. Someone once said that the largest sex organ is the brain, and he or she hit it on the mark.
One of the advantages of D/s play is that many subs will become fetishistically enthralled with a Domme's body, regardless of whether it meets traditional cultural norms of beauty. Thus, for instance, many subs are attracted by BBW Dommes. The Domme is beautiful and sexy in the sub's eyes and mind, regardless of how she might be judged in a vanilla beauty contest.
One outside limit on this might be if a physical issue actually impedes a Domme's ability to engage in a particular activity ("I can't whip you-- I'd have a heart attack"). But the more pernicious threat seems to be that the Domme's own insecurities about her physical presentation create inhibitions that prevent from doing things that both she-- and the sub-- really want to do or have done. For instance, I've never been with a Domme whose feet, ass, legs, etc., I wouldn't love to worship. But I've had Dommes reluctant to let me do those things largely because of her own body image concerns. It's a shame, but it is a real factor that impedes some persons' ability to enjoy themselves.
I don't have any insights as to how to overcome these issues, other than to be willing to take a risk and see what happens. Subs are probably the last people in the world from whom you have anything to fear as far as body image criticism. We worship you as you are, and are greatful for the gift of access to your body when and how you choose to grant it.
Regards, ATP
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