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RE: Is God a Woman? - 9/30/2007 7:47:23 PM

Rule

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TNstepsout
Does God masturbate? Yes, that's what caused the Big Bang.

There never was a big bang, but otherwise the statement is correct. According to mythology the Creator brought forth Creation by masturbating. This is a profound concept, both cosmologically and spiritually as well as theologically.

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 9/30/2007 7:48:26 PM

Alumbrado

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quote:

All that matters is living a good life and being happy, and if it helps someone to do that by way of believing in quarks, fairies or the jolly green giant, it doesnt matter.

Well, in the matter of Twain, it apparently helped him to deal with the death of his older daughter and the illnesses of his younger one and his wife (among other misfortunes), to blast God as a malevolent thug, and Christians as fools or hypocrites.

From what comfortable armchair do people get the right to whine about being offended by how others view such things?

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 9/30/2007 7:50:38 PM

dcnovice

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quote:

All that matters is living a good life and being happy, and if it helps someone to do that by way of believing in quarks, fairies or the jolly green giant, it doesnt matter.

I think it can matter if people argue that their beliefs should be the basis of public policy, a phenomenon not unknown in the United States.

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 9/30/2007 7:52:05 PM

SusanofO

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Rule: I just thought it was funny.

It may be a profound concept, but in my admittedly limited human experience, it also insinuates that the God/Godess is a biological being, that reacts with physical consequences. And people can make of that whatever they will, I suppose.

P.S. I always love it when people seriously try to figure this kind of thing out.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 9/30/2007 7:55:04 PM >

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 9/30/2007 7:53:03 PM

dcnovice

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quote:

Now, can we please get back to our discussion of ogling women's tits?

Women have tits too?

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 9/30/2007 8:04:41 PM

CuriousLord

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quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice
quote:

Now, can we please get back to our discussion of ogling women's tits?

Women have tits too?

Yeah, tits are pretty common these days. Considering the greater survival rate of females, the prevalence of obesity, the increasingly common boobs jobs, and the transexual revolution, boobs are everywhere.

Hell, soon, trees are going to start manifesting breasts. Why? I don't know. Maybe they'll start soaking up all the fatty cells in the ground, gaining man-boob-ish offshoots. Perhaps some future president will see fit to grant boob jobs in a blaze of universal heathcare and environmentalism. Maybe some geek will create nanobots to alter tree DNA to do so, just like they create computer viruses today. Maybe the sexual deviance of humans will grow to the point that we're just screwing anything there is, and trees are made to be more.. sensual. Maybe we'll all start living in a virtual reality-like MMORPG, and the GM's will decide to create a booby day in which all the objects suddenly take on breasts, where milk spills out of the nipples which coat the ground. But, point being, there will be boobs, and lots of 'em.

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 9/30/2007 8:10:09 PM

SunnyTawse

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Doesn't it sem a bit anthropomorphic to assign gender to the Divine?

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certainty is a ridiculous one. -- Voltaire

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 9/30/2007 8:44:43 PM

CuriousLord

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People assume that a divine creature, capable of creating the intracies of the universe, would find us to more interesting than we find amoeba. That assumption alone is vulgar enough to make the gender consideration nearly look reasonable by contrast.

Maybe we're eatting God's brain, so he's paying attention to us now?

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 9/30/2007 8:47:23 PM

SunnyTawse

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quote:

ORIGINAL: CuriousLord

People assume that a divine creature, capable of creating the intracies of the universe, would find us to more interesting than we find amoeba. That assumption alone is vulgar enough to make the gender consideration nearly look reasonable by contrast.

I suppose.

I liked some of your other posts on the subject as well.

Sunny

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 9/30/2007 9:50:11 PM

Sinergy

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SunnyTawse

Doesn't it sem a bit anthropomorphic to assign gender to the Divine?

I forget who the quote is attributed to, but it was once said that Mankind for all his wisdom had a strange
prediliction for worshipping Gods with all the attributes of a spoiled 2 year old.

Anthropomorphize that!

Sinergy

p.s. By the way, your statement was spot on as far as Im concerned.

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 9/30/2007 10:03:14 PM

domiguy

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I know for a fact that God is a woman....In fact it was myself and a few of my buddies that coined the phrase "The Big Bang"...It was after a few drinks and God was just hanging out at this stanky dive bar....You would think that God would be a tad bit more attractive...Anywhoo, one thing led to another and we got a sleazy motel room on Lincoln Avenue...Did you know that God has the word "SLACKER" tattooed right above her ass? We all gave her a good shot...I mean how many chances are you gonna get to pound the almighty in the tail?

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 9/30/2007 10:04:40 PM

Vendaval

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Then why don't men have their dicks on their chins?

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 9/30/2007 10:19:59 PM

domiguy

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she doesn't dig clitoral stimulation...And she smokes Lucky Strikes unfiltered.

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 9/30/2007 10:21:10 PM

foolishguy

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SusanofO

quote:

ORIGINAL: TNstepsout
Does God masturbate? Yes, that's what caused the Big Bang.

I really liked this.

- Susan

I also found that very, very funny. Is the universe then the ejaculate of God? Brothers and sisters we cum together today in peace and humility. It’s an idea that really sticks with me.

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 10/1/2007 1:01:56 AM

meatcleaver

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There is no god so the question is irrelevent.

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 10/1/2007 3:01:39 AM

Rule

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quote:

ORIGINAL: CuriousLord
People assume that a divine creature, capable of creating the intracies of the universe, would find us more interesting than we find amoeba.

Amoebae are fascinating.

quote:

ORIGINAL: meatcleaver
There is no god so the question is irrelevent.

Nevertheless when all is said and done all creatures, whether amoebae or men, will be judged by the God of the Dead and their parts be reincarnated according to their merit - or send into eternal oblivion.

< Message edited by Rule -- 10/1/2007 3:47:18 AM >

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 10/1/2007 3:42:36 AM

LadyEllen

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Alumbrado

quote:

All that matters is living a good life and being happy, and if it helps someone to do that by way of believing in quarks, fairies or the jolly green giant, it doesnt matter.

Well, in the matter of Twain, it apparently helped him to deal with the death of his older daughter and the illnesses of his younger one and his wife (among other misfortunes), to blast God as a malevolent thug, and Christians as fools or hypocrites.

From what comfortable armchair do people get the right to whine about being offended by how others view such things?

Exactly - if it helps, and it doesnt affect anyone else who doesnt want to get involved, its fine.

Given my view of the regrettably omnisicient, simple minded foreign cult, thats as much as I'd best say, probably.

Thing is, life is full of shit. Science can tell us how deep the shit is, can tell us what the shit is and can provide a raft on which to bypass most of the shit. But only religion can attempt the illusion of making the shit stink much less.

E

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 10/1/2007 3:48:42 AM

LadyEllen

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quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice

quote:

All that matters is living a good life and being happy, and if it helps someone to do that by way of believing in quarks, fairies or the jolly green giant, it doesnt matter.

I think it can matter if people argue that their beliefs should be the basis of public policy, a phenomenon not unknown in the United States.

Sadly, this is the case the world over and has been a theme in the west since Constantine the Bastard became Roman emperor.

E

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 10/1/2007 4:21:05 AM

meatcleaver

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Rule

quote:

ORIGINAL: meatcleaver
There is no god so the question is irrelevent.

Nevertheless when all is said and done all creatures, whether amoebae or men, will be judged by the God of the Dead and their parts be reincarnated according to their merit - or send into eternal oblivion.

The god of the dead doesn't exist and as an allegory is rather irrelevent, everything is in a state of flux and the material of which we comprise will disperse. At our age we are already made of completely different atoms to that of which we were made of when we were born. If your mind doesn't exist, you don't exist for all intents and purposes.

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RE: Is God a Woman? - 10/1/2007 5:10:29 AM

Rule

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quote:

ORIGINAL: meatcleaver
The god of the dead doesn't exist

That is a pretty definitive statement. Do you have any arguments to support it?

According to world mythology people used to interact with his incarnation in our universe. Ever tried to google him?

quote:

ORIGINAL: meatcleaver
and as an allegory is rather irrelevant

The theological and spiritual implications of his incarnations in our universe are profoundly allegorically relevant.

quote:

ORIGINAL: meatcleaver
, everything is in a state of flux and the material of which we comprise will disperse. At our age we are already made of completely different atoms to that of which we were made of when we were born. If your mind doesn't exist, you don't exist for all intents and purposes.

Nevertheless the mind does have a continuous existence, despite the atoms of our brains all having been exchanged for others many times. So the phenomenon of the mind is not static and inert and dead, nor dependent upon a particular configuration of atoms.

The old-fashioned idea that organisms are newtonian automatons has been surpassed since about a century. That was when a new kid on the block did away with that unimaginative and non-viable idea. This new kid goes by the name of Quantum Mechanics. Yes, everything is in a state of flux, alive.

< Message edited by Rule -- 10/1/2007 5:13:06 AM >

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