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RE: older and larger subs - 10/3/2007 10:16:43 AM   
xoxi


Posts: 1066
Status: offline 		That is SUCH an excellent point desertdancer.

I'm one of those girls who loves the blond/light brown hair and blue or green eyes.  The clean cut 'All-American' (or Canadian or British or Australian) look just makes me melt inside.  I also like guys to have some meat on them - not obese but definitely a solid frame, broad shoulders, a bit of muscle and so on.  I know a girl who likes the COMPLETE opposite...tall skinny anorexic swarthy guys with bonus points if they're goth or punk.

So naturally I absolutely LOVE going to the clubs with her.  We will NEVER fight over a guy...ever!  And I love you too for not liking my 'type' because it leaves more for me

I think the OP should in a way be happy that so many people are up front with their preferences because it means she won't be stuck in a dead end relationship with a guy who doesn't appreciate her when she happens to meet the guy who thinks she is sex incarnate.  I'm personally glad when I don't waste my time (and my emotions) getting attached to someone who really is only killing time with me.

(in reply to desertdancer)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: older and larger subs - 10/3/2007 10:43:46 AM   
sweetNsmartBBW


Posts: 167
Joined: 5/16/2007
Status: offline 		I think that the bias toward younger and thinner is not a bdsm thing- but a general societal thing that spills over into BDSM.  In most people's eyes younger + thinnner= healther and more desirable.  Not true for all people- but it's what folks are conditioned to believe.  We are bombarded every day- through marketing, media, and entertainment- to idealize women that are super slim and young.    

Go back a few centureies and look at the "ideal"- when being thin and tanned meant you were poor and out working the fields.  Back then, most men preferred buxom, pale, larger women. Being plump in those times sign of good breeding and affluence  - after all, being inside and well fed meant you were a woman of leisure and means.  Check out the Rubenesque paintings; what we now consider a bbw was very attractive and those women were likely the most sought after of all. 

Personally, I'm don't dwell on it much.  Both age and weight discrimination are realities; but what matters is how I feel about myself.    I put "bbw" in my screen name so that folks that have a hang-up about it can pass me by- it screens out a lot of people I would prefer not to chat with anyway.   I happen to love the person I am...and any Dominant that I could imagine being with would never see my weight as a hindrance.

(in reply to xoxi)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: older and larger subs - 10/3/2007 11:56:35 AM   
MasterFerry


Posts: 3
Joined: 9/27/2006
Status: offline 		I hear mostly that subs want an older Master. Size doesn't matter to me. A BBW in bodybodage is very beautiful.

(in reply to sweetNsmartBBW)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: older and larger subs - 10/3/2007 12:16:44 PM   
sweetNsmartBBW


Posts: 167
Joined: 5/16/2007
Status: offline 		I think You may be right- many subs do want an older Master.  Somehow it seems many translate age into wisdom and the ability to lead; which I'm sure is true with some Dom's, and not so true with others.  For me, age is a factor mostly in regards to being at a compatible place in life- not sure I'd have similar goals, interests, or commonalities with a much younger (or older) Dominant.  

(in reply to MasterFerry)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: older and larger subs - 10/3/2007 12:35:40 PM   
SlaveOwnerDave


Posts: 113
Joined: 8/22/2007
From: Petaluma, CA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetNsmartBBW

I think You may be right- many subs do want an older Master. Somehow it seems many translate age into wisdom and the ability to lead; which I'm sure is true with some Dom's, and not so true with others. For me, age is a factor mostly in regards to being at a compatible place in life- not sure I'd have similar goals, interests, or commonalities with a much younger (or older) Dominant.

The desire for older Owners/Masters/Mistresses is not really about wisdom, or leadership ability, per se. It is about them having more life-experience. They also tend to be more relaxed--or able to fake it--than younger folks.

Older people SHOULD have developed good coping mechanisms, better understanding for the wants and needs of others, a better ability to listen to complaints/errors without creating a big scene, etc., than they had when younger. I guess that does add up to wisdom and leadership. [I knew that all the time. I was just testing Me!]

I recently told someone "I would rather have had more life and less experience!". But One has what One has. The end.

But if you find a young Man who is good... GRAB!
Slave Owner Dave

_____________________________

Intelligence, Logic, and Reason are useful--but only when used!

http://www.experienceproject.com/about/masterdavidgoodmen
http://Master-Dave.LiveJournal.com/
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(in reply to sweetNsmartBBW)
Profile   Post #: 65
RE: older and larger subs - 10/3/2007 2:00:44 PM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline 		my desire for an older Master has absolutely nothing to do with wisdom, leadership ability, life experience, relaxed personality, ability to fake it, coping mechanisms or anything else that that comes from the neck...

it has 99% to do with sex...older men, in general, are less concerned with getting off and getting off...and if they are not they are way too clingy because they are making up for the fact that they suck in bed and aren't willing to learn or compensate with other things, you have hands and they made toys for a reason....

give me a 21 year old guy that is as good as good as the 50 year old guy i fooled around with friday, and i will marry him tonight...cause...umm yea...lol...but that might just be my horny little kitty talking...

chelle


_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to SlaveOwnerDave)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: older and larger subs - 10/3/2007 2:02:45 PM   
MstrFrank


Posts: 1
Joined: 9/23/2007
Status: offline 		I definitely prefer older BBW subs.  They seem to have so much to offer and love.

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: older and larger subs - 10/3/2007 10:12:36 PM   
kc692


Posts: 3701
Joined: 3/24/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

I just find it amusing that so many people on here think I have a low self esteem. Nobody seemed to think that when I only wore expensive designer clothes and spent hours in front of the mirror every day making sure my makeup was flawless and every hair was in place.


Ummmmm, some (not all, and certainly not me) would say that a sign of low self esteem in fact is spending hours in front of the mirror and making sure the outward experience was flawless to mask the interior.

Disclaimer: this was not directed at you just the remark, because that was actually covered in the psych classes I took in high school.  As I said, of course there are exceptions to every rule.
edited for a typo and to add a smiley

< Message edited by kc692 -- 10/3/2007 10:16:20 PM >

_____________________________

Anyone can overpower; not many can INSPIRE.....

This is only MY opinion. If it's not yours, let's agree in advance to agree to disagree, OR, you can just get the fuck over what I had to say:)

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: older and larger subs - 10/3/2007 10:34:45 PM   
defiantbadgirl


Posts: 2988
Joined: 11/14/2005
Status: offline 		Exactly my point.

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Only in the United States is the health of the people secondary to making money. If this is what "capitalism" is about, I'll take socialism any day of the week.


Collared by MartinSpankalot May 13 2008

(in reply to kc692)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: older and larger subs - 10/3/2007 10:51:30 PM   
kc692


Posts: 3701
Joined: 3/24/2005
Status: offline 		  OK

_____________________________

Anyone can overpower; not many can INSPIRE.....

This is only MY opinion. If it's not yours, let's agree in advance to agree to disagree, OR, you can just get the fuck over what I had to say:)

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: older and larger subs - 10/4/2007 11:26:09 AM   
biracalsub4wmDom


Posts: 109
Joined: 7/26/2007
From: Illinois
Status: offline 		i am 33 years old, and also consider myself BBW, or, i like to say "pleasingly plump" at ....5'4", 225lb.  my personal preference in a man is one that is definately taller than me, but not necisarrily bigger than me.  even though i am overweight, i like fit to average size men.  i'm sort of whimpy, so they can usually ALWAYS overpower me.  As far as age....i personally LOVE younger men.  i always have.  even in highschool, my senior year i had a MAD crush on a freshman boy.  lol  at 33, i could definately submit to a younger Dom.  25 - 40 is the age range i prefer.  if they are on the young end of that scale, it's all good to me, as long as they are STRONG, mature, and know what they want, and are looking for the same things I am.  :) 

_____________________________

blessings...

biracialsub

***Please respect that I am OWNED & not seeking a Master. Thank You***




(in reply to kc692)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: older and larger subs - 10/4/2007 11:43:02 AM   
YourhandMyAss


Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		Yes. Every one does. Wasn't it you, some threads ago who said any one you would date had to have all his natural teeth and all his natural hair? and could not be balding?

Why do you get to demand that,and someone don't get to demand skinny, or not middle age or what ever they don't get to demand?
quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

I like Doms with dark hair and tattoos. Everyone has their preferences.

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: older and larger subs - 10/4/2007 12:19:57 PM   
velvetears


Posts: 2933
Joined: 6/19/2006
Status: offline 		FR

i think many people consider age, weight, as well as other factors (having any kind of mental illness or being on meds as in another thread going on) but many don't.  i have preferences in what i like, i think we all do.  i always state up front i am a bbw because i know it is a limit many men have.  i suppose as i get older the pool of men will shrink from what it would be if i were 27 but that's natural and i accept that. i wouldn't prefer a man to be younger anyway, although i did go out with a dom 10 years my junior for about a year, when i was in my late 30's.  i don't let preferences hold me back - they are just guide posts for me. 

The last dom i was involved with (only 6 months) was very thin and not tall, only 5ft8 (average), not in my "preference range*.  i never had the feeling when we were together my weight bothered him, although if it were a perfect world i would suppose he would "choose" an average weight person.  We were a good match because we complimented each other SM wise.   i did used to wonder what others thought when they saw us together when we went to clubs and such, being there was such a dosparity in our weights, i mean he was very thin - i was almost double him. 


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(in reply to YourhandMyAss)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: older and larger subs - 10/4/2007 12:55:54 PM   
Lumus


Posts: 5968
Joined: 9/16/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

Right now there's a thread in Ask A Mistress about male subs preferring older bbw Dommes. It seems to be generating alot of positive responses. I was wondering how many Doms out there prefer older bbw subs?


Read through the thread [up to this point! ] and there's not much commentary to offer, other than a response to the initial post, so:

I've said in a few other posts [they're here...somewhere...] that I don't judge by looks and never have.  This is true, and carries on to the extent that I don't have much fashion sense, nor do I care much about which way my hair is brushed.  I just don't think about looks at all.

Now, that's not to say I don't acknowledge them - I'm not blind.

I have been with older and younger, and the vast majority was larger than me.  I was stuck at 150 pounds for over a decade, only recently crept up 10 pounds [and stabilized].  I'd estimate the average weight of the women I've been with, D/s or vanilla, at around 220 pounds - my more cynical friends have referred to me as a "chubby chaser". [I don't like the term, personally.]

My current girl, on the other hand...well, she's under 5 foot and under 100 pounds.  She's not physically like anyone I've ever been with prior.  I don't love her any less, or more, for her size or age [which is within a year of me - prior to her, most were between 7 years younger up to 3 years older than me].

What counts is what we mean to each other.  That's all that matters, and to hell with the rest.



_____________________________

<Talk to educate; listen to learn.>

~ the other half of "L&L" ~

I have been dubbed the Rainmaker. Do not make me take your water for my tribe.

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)
Profile   Post #: 74
RE: older and larger subs - 10/4/2007 3:56:19 PM   
blueeyespup


Posts: 13
Joined: 10/1/2007
From: Canada
Status: offline 		Okay I know this post has a million responses already but I just wanted to add my opinion, which may or may not have already been stated.

Personally, I don't think there is anything wrong with men having body type preferences or expectations of their subs.  Especially a Dominant man, it seems like it would be in their nature to have a good idea of what it is they want.  Just like us girls have preferences when it comes to Men.  And it may seem unfair that Dominant men tend to prefer younger women, but the same could be said the other way around... that it's unfair to the younger Dominant Men, that submissive women tend to prefer older Men.  

Anyway, accroding to many of the profiles I have read since joining this site, age and body type are not the most important thing to a lot of  the men here, and even if it were, you probably wouldn't wanna get involved with those type of men anyway right?

I think BBWs are beautiful and many men  think so as well.  Just as petite women are beautiful.  All women are beautiful!  And although I am new to all this, i do know that submission comes from within, so hopefully men recognize that, its got nothing to do with what's on the outside.  I am sure alot of them have the barbie doll fantasy that a few girls here mentioned, but fantasy isn't always a reality... most guys realize that i think.  Can't blame them though, barbie is pretty hawt :)   As for age, that's just a state of mind.  And the other ladies on here are right, you are still young.  Good luck in your search ~ if you are searching that is!~

*kisses*

blue eyes.


(in reply to defiantbadgirl)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: older and larger subs - 10/9/2007 7:52:07 PM   
slaveelle


Posts: 116
Joined: 9/28/2007
From: Australia
Status: offline 		Cries@being called a what was it. oh yea. upstraight rude. Hmm i like to think that im being liked for me, not my weight or size, and being judged before i even get a chance to say anything or even you getting to know me...well im kinda  torn. Ok, so what do i have to do now,,,,gain weight?..

_____________________________

"No bond is stronger than that of the Beast"

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)
Profile   Post #: 76
RE: older and larger subs - 10/10/2007 10:32:52 AM   
DarkDaddyZ


Posts: 805
Joined: 4/7/2006
Status: offline 		My age window is 26-60.  And I prefer bigger women (BBW) period. I do play with and have had relationships with those who are smaller.  But big girls make me go gaa-gaa! One of my (vanilla) promotions is Big Girl parties nationwide.

Z-


_____________________________

"Flirting is part of the job description." DJ Jesus (Lucy Daughter Of The Devil)

Vanilla Official Music Page http://www.myspace.com/djzulu

(in reply to PsychoticWolf)
Profile   Post #: 77
RE: older and larger subs - 10/10/2007 11:21:01 AM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline 		26 - 60?  *sniffles* what about super cute 24 year old sex kittens

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to DarkDaddyZ)
Profile   Post #: 78
RE: older and larger subs - 10/10/2007 11:23:53 AM   
BOUNTYHUNTER


Posts: 9259
Joined: 2/5/2004
Status: offline 		Thats works for me...lol.. BUT if I only seek a purely service slave I seek older more experienced one.....

_____________________________

US going to hell in a hand basket/

(in reply to chellekitty)
Profile   Post #: 79
RE: older and larger subs - 10/10/2007 3:33:07 PM   
NControlofU


Posts: 204
Joined: 11/14/2005
Status: offline 		I prefer a slave close to my age.  Mine is 51 and I am almost 56.  We're very compatible, know the same music, movies an remember the same events from when we were growing up.  As for size, I prefer a more voluptuous figure.  I never cared for skinny but don't have an attraction to extra large women.

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)
Profile   Post #: 80
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